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Running in the house, I went to the bathroom and did my business. I went to my room and pulled off my sweater, then headed back down stairs.
"Uh, Dad?" I began.
He looked over at me with the begining of a smile "What, Pumpkin?"
"Ah, nothing." I just sat on the couch and flipped on the TV.
Dad came over and sat beside me. "Pumpkin, you were very charming tonight. Thank you. I know I don't say that often enough."
I looked at him and grinned. He was right. We seemed to just tolerate each other lately. Tonight was different for both of us. Still, there was one question I had to ask. "Uh, Daddy, why did that man and his son think I was a girl?"
Dad looked at me, then looked away. I heard him sniffle and he quickly got up and walked out of the room. I sat there not knowing what was what. Had I asked a dumb question? I had to know.
I started to get off the couch as dad came back in the room. "Bed time, Pumpkin." was said.
I stood and headed for my room, but as I hugged him goodnight, he held out his hand to me and said "Here, wear this tonight."
I took the proffered item and went to my room. I went to the bathroom and peed, then after washing my hands, I brushed my teeth. I took my hair brush and went into my room. I took off my t-shirt and pants and got out a clean pair of undies. I rehung the pants and the Tee went into the dirty clothes along with the dirty undies and socks. My shoes were lined up in my closet. I reached for the item that Dad had handed me and allowed it to unfold. I turned it right side up and saw it was a sleep shirt. I thought 'What the heck' and put it on. Of course it did have a weird collar, but dad wanted me to sleep in it, so. I sat in front of my mirror and brushed my hair. Mom used to do mine and I would do hers. I had long hair cause hers looked so pretty and I wanted to look like her.
Thinking about her made me cry and I got in bed and hugged my pillow to me. I sobbed thinking about how much I missed mom. 'Why God, why did she have to die?' I wondered as I fell asleep.
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Comments
This is really getting interesting.
When Joey was brushing his hair, and thought about how his mother used to brush his the same way, and he brushed hers and he wanted to look just like her, the inner workings of being a girl are born. Not to mention he was wearing the sleepshirt with the funny collar his dad had given him to wear to bed. I can't wait to see how this turns out.
Be strong, because it is in our strength that we can heal.
Love & Hugs,
Barbara
"With confidence and forbearance, we will have the strength to move forward."
Love & hugs,
Barbara
"If I have to be this girl in me, Then I have the right to be."
Something very strange is going on here
Calling his son Pumpkin, the night *shirt* add in Dad's odd reactions and tears in his eyes. ""Lucy, you need do some 'xplaining."
Is some weird magic going on here and dad can't stop it or is behind it? Or does the boy resemble his late mom? Is he even a boy? Mom has been gone some time and dad was distant until of late. Is the child of indeterminate sex, inter sex or whatever and they decided to wait and let him/her choose then mom dies and dad retreats in mourning for a few years?
The coworker thinks the child is a girl as does waiter and the man's boy.
Innocent, twisted, whatever the true plot, this is very interesting.
John in Wauwatosa
John in Wauwatosa
What we sometimes can's perceive about ourselves....
...others can help us to do so.
How does a parent answer a "son's" question about why he is being treated or mistaken for a girl? Talk about uncomfortable! The fact that the father isn't forcing his child to be 'masculine' speaks volumes about this loving, gentle, open-minded man.
Obviously Joey is projecting an identity that is being perceived as female by the world at large, but the child is naively unaware of this situation. How do you protect your child in these circumstances? I'd bet that the father's heartsick with worry that his child will be attacked, or at least not accepted, especially after so recently losing his wife. I wonder who he confides in, from whom he gets advice about how to support his child? I'd venture to guess the confidant would be more likely female, if not intersexed. It'd be more difficult to find a male friend who would support the dad letting the child find his/her own way, I think - maybe a psychologist? Like the child, the father has a difficult and dangerous road to tread; luckily for Joey they seem to be together on this journey of growing self awareness and identity realization.
At first I was wary of the father's motives, but as I thought about it, he never told Joey what to wear to dinner, but made the child think about what s/he thought was appropriate. The family dynamic, the 'boy' being called Pumpkin, is also revealing - what boy that age wouldn't protest such a term of endearment, especially from the dad? The nightgown being so easily accepted makes me think that not only did it please Joey's sensibilities, but that s/he trusts the father - there is a great deal of trust between these two.
This is getting very interesting!
YW
PS - I'll have to look back at that posting about gender specific pronouns! This comment was difficult/awkward to write clearly!
He conquers who endures. ~ Persius
Grief
Okay, grief makes people do strange things.
-- Daphne Xu (a page of contents)