A family spiralling out of control.
A child forced to grow up too fast.
Is there any room left for a young girl to find herself?
Book Two ‘Childhood’
Chapter 8 – Sanctuary
Author's Note: Cassandra may have escaped the immediate threat from her family, but now she must face the uncertainty of the unknown. I hope you are all enjoying Cassandra’s story as much as I am in writing it. As ever please be tolerant of my failings, and forthright with your criticism. ~Persephone
Photo by Christopher Campbell on Unsplash
© Persephone 2019
Cassandra sat miserably on the transit back into LA. She felt horribly alone once she had turned her ‘phone off again. She also slipped on an oversize pair of sunglasses she’d bought from a street vendor to hide the redness of her eyes.
Right now she could imagine Kath and Aunt Megan sitting together on the couch in Aunt Megan’s apartment, reading the letters that had been so hard to write. Would they hate her? Would they be embarrassed to have her in their family?
It was probably best she wasn’t there, Cassie decided. That way she was spared the looks of recrimination, the arguments and the demands to stop. To go back to pretending to be someone she wasn’t. This way was best. She’d kept her promise to Mom. Kath was safe and Cassie’s last memories were of being trusted and loved by her little sis, not despised and an embarrassment.
Thirty minutes later she hopped off the transit at Union station and made the fifteen-minute walk to the LAPD headquarters. Screwing up her courage and with the biggest smile she could manage, she pushed her way into the building’s foyer and headed for the reception while cops swirled around her. Cassie noticed the lady receptionist was busy on a call, so thankfully dropped the bulky envelope on the desk in front of her, turned on her heel and marched swiftly out.
Twenty-five minutes later Cassandra was standing out front from the Chinatown Metro station, having taken a few moments in a public restroom to pull her hair back into a ponytail, change her top and transfer the contents of her gym bag to an old back pack. She was about to turn her disposable phone back on just as she caught sight of Michael’s pick up. Within moments she slipped into the passenger’s seat.
“Let’s go somewhere we can talk,” was all she said.
They ended up in a Denny’s near MacArthur Park.
Once they both had soda’s in front of them, Michael pinned her to the seat with a stare. “So Cass. Talk to me.”
Hesitantly at first, then with increasing desperation, Cassandra told him everything. The blood spattered clothes, the baseball bat, the video footage, even the video testimony she had recorded of herself on Friday, before her father and brothers had got home.
“I know you said no more spying, but I had to know.’ Cassie whispered fiercely. “And once I knew, family or no family, I knew what I had to do. Anything else would have been betrayal. Of Charlie. Of you, Peter, your folks. Of Mom. What they did was evil!”
Michael’s eye’s softened as she slumped back, exhausted, in her seat. “You’ve been incredibly brave Cassie. It’s now time to let other’s pick up the burden and get you safe.”
“Safe?” She snorted. “If I go home having run, they’ll be out on bail in a few days and kill me, or at least beat me to a bloody pulp so I’d be too afraid to offer testimony. If I stay with Aunt Megan, they’ll still be out on bail and come to Pasadena, then do the same, and probably to Kath and Aunt Megan as well. If I go to the cops, they’ll turn me over to Children’s Services. Do you know what happens to trans kids placed with them, despite all their fancy diversity statements? I’d prefer to go home and die quickly than face that.”
“I can take you home with me? You can stay with Mom and Dad for a few days…”
Cassie shook her head. “If I do that, what do you think a defense attorney would do to my testimony? They’d all walk. Charlie would be in even more danger and I’d still be running for my life. If I was lucky.”
Michael narrowed his eyes in thought, then began to grin as an idea struck him. “You ready for a walk on the wild side li’l sis?” He asked, then pulled his ‘phone out.
“Are you sure about this?” Cassandra asked as Michael pulled up outside an expensive looking property in Silver Lake, less than two miles north of MacArthur Park. “I mean, why would this lady help me?”
“Because she started out just like you. Because she’s a passionate supporter of LGBT children’s rights, and most of all because I was able to stop her getting attacked the same way those fuckers did to Charlie. She owes me and keeps reminding me of that. Come on Cassie. I promise, Paris is going to love you.” Then he jumped out and walked round to open her door.
“Uh, thank you.” Cassie blushed.
“Don’t get used to it. Little sisters only get treated like this on special occasions.” Michael teased, then led the way to the front door.
“Michael! How’s my very favorite Marine? And what’s with you sounding all dark and mysterious on the ‘phone? Come on in. Cheryl won’t be back for a few hours I’m afraid.” A tall glamorous blonde rushed out and bussed Michael heartily on each cheek.
Unembarrassed, Michael threw an arm around her waist and turned her to see Cassie. “Paris, I’d like to introduce you to Cassandra.”
“Uh, hi Paris.” Cassie managed to squeak out.
The lady smiled and quirked an eyebrow at Michael.
“Let’s get inside and I’ll tell you the whole story.”
A few minutes later Cassie was sitting nervously next to Michael with a glass of ice water clasped in her hands.
“You heard about Charlie?” Michael asked.
Paris’ face scrunched up in anger. “I hope they get the bastards who did it and throw away the key! Charlie is the sweetest boy. He wouldn’t harm a fly.”
“Paris? They are about to get what’s coming to them in the next day or so. Their names are Brian, Sean and James McCarrick, Martin Johansson and David Younger.”
“So why haven’t the police already picked the scumbags up?” Paris demanded, her eyes flashing.
“Because Cassandra only dropped off the evidence at the LAPD headquarters a little under two hours ago. Details of the blood spattered clothing, the bat used in the attack, video with full audio of the fu...’suspects’ planning and preparing for the attack, cleaning up after, and bragging to each other about what they did. Along with testimony about long term homophobic attitudes with repeated threats to life.”
Paris turned her gaze with considerable interest to a visibly cowering Cassandra. “And how did you get all that sweetie?” She asked.
Michael answered for her. “Because Brian McCarrick is her father, and Sean and Jimmy are her brothers.” Paris gasped even as Michael continued, “she truly has been working under cover for more than a year trying to protect Charlie. You see, the name on her birth certificate reads Carl McCarrick.” He reached out and hugged Cassie to him. “She’s a ‘little sister’ Paris, she’s in danger, and right now she needs your help.”
When Michael finally left to get home he gave Cassie another hug. “You’re safe here Cassie, you can trust Paris and her partner. I’ll be back in a few days in person. In the meantime, keep all your ‘phones off without the SIM cards. Promise?”
When Cassie nodded he leant in to kiss her forehead, before turning and heading for his pickup.
At the same time in Pasadena a distraught Kath was curled up in her aunt’s arms.
“But why Aunty Meg? I wouldn’t have hated him..her. I love her!”
“I don’t know sweetie. I can only guess that she was trying to do the best she could for you, for us. She was probably terrified. You know what your Grampa was like. You told me what your dad shouted when he stopped Sean attacking Ca..ssandra.” Megan gently stroked Kath’s hair.
“But we could have protected hi..er. We could! Why run away? Doesn’t he, she, love us?”
Aunt Megan sighed. “You know she does sweetie. Don’t ever ever forget that. So much that she ran to keep you safe.”
Kath refused to accept that answer. “But Dad and the guys will be locked up. Then we’d all be safe.”
“It’s not that simple sweetie. First it takes time for something like this to come to trial. That means they could be out on bail for months maybe, and free to come and go as they want. Then there’s the family and friends of those other two boys. They will still be free to come looking for Ca..ssie. The first place they will look will be here.”
“But the police will protect us won’t they?”
“They can’t be everywhere honey. And we can’t stay hiding inside the apartment all day every day either.”
“I want her home Aunty.” Kath wailed.
“So do I sweetie, so do I.”
Cheryl and Paris’s home in Silver Lake appeared massive to Cassandra as she was given a guided tour. The closet in the room she was shown was almost as big as her bedroom back in Harbor City, and its bathroom was bigger than their family one!
“Okay honey, if you want to settle in and rest for a while that’s fine. Dinner will be at seven after Cheryl gets home from the salon. Will you be able to find your way back down to the kitchen?” Paris asked.
“Um, have you got a map?”
Paris let out a peal of laughter. “Michael was right, you are precious!”
“Ma’am, if it’s okay with you, do you mind if I come and help with fixing dinner?”
“It’s Paris, not ma’am Cassie. Makes me feel like my grandmother. I was just going to order something in, but sure, I could do with the company. Come on then.”
Nervously at first, then with increasing confidence as Paris just kept nodding her approval to Cassie’s explorations, Cassie rummaged through the cupboards and fridge/freezer in Paris’ kitchen.
“Do you and Cheryl like Fettuccine Alfredo Con Pollo? I can fix it with a salad?” She asked.
“You can cook that?” Paris eyes went wide.
“I’ve been doing the cooking at home for the last year and a half. My Aunt Megan taught me.” Cassie told her proudly.
Dinner was a success, with both women praising Cassandra’s cooking to the heavens.
“I’m going to ban you from the kitchen.” Cheryl declared jokingly. “If I keep eating like this I’ll be the size of a house. Do you think you can do smaller portions?”
“Um, I’m used to cooking for three guys who shifted food from their plates so fast I thought of giving them shovels rather than forks. I guess I can try.”
At the end of the meal Cassandra stood to clear the table, only to be waved back to her seat.
“Rules of the house. Cook doesn’t clean.” Paris told her. “Chill out here, then we’ll discuss what’s going to happen over the next week or two.”
Five minutes later she and Cheryl returned to find Cassie fidgeting in her seat.
“Relax hun. It’s like we discussed with Michael. We are going to keep you safe and below the radar here, until we know what’s happening with your father and brothers. Both of us are in awe of your bravery. And what you did for Michael’s brother Charlie? Wow! I can see why Michael adopted you as his little sister.” Paris told her.
“Um, Paris?” Cassie asked tentatively. She still wasn’t sure about this strong, self-confident woman who Michael had left her with, despite his assurances. She couldn’t believe Paris had once been like her. “Michael mentioned something about you having been in a similar position as Charlie. Can I ask about it?”
Paris frowned as Cheryl reached over to rub her partner’s shoulders.
When she saw that, Cassie immediately tried to apologize, but Paris waved it away. “No, I’ll tell you. It’ll help you understand Michael better. And why we are so willing to help you.” She let out a long breath. “I was nineteen, and going to the same youth support group meetings Charlie was at. I’d only started my transition the year before.” She choked back a bitter laugh. “My Mom and Dad weren’t exactly supportive, but I guess you know all about that?” She cocked an eye towards Cassie who ducked a nod in return.
“Well, in walks Charlie. Twelve years old and cute as a button, only to be followed by his hunky big bro. The gay guys’ eyes lit up when they saw Michael, only to have their hopes come crashing down when they realized he was there for his brother, not himself.” She giggled at the memory. “The thing was, he wasn’t uncomfortable or nervy or anything. He was just Michael. Not a judgmental bone in his body. We all liked him, and used him to get a hetero guy’s take on things.” Paris smiled at the memory. Then the smile leached away.
“Then came that night.”
Cheryl moved closer and put her arm around Paris’ waist.
“We were leaving the hall, like always, when a couple of SUVs came screeching up in the parking lot. It was bunch of guys from my old High School. How they knew I’d be there I have no idea, but there they were. Five of them between me and my car. Derek, the nightmare of my time at school, he just sneered at me and pulled out a knife. Didn’t say a word, just grinned as he walked towards me. I was frozen stiff I was so terrified. I just knew I was gonna to die, right there on the tarmac. Then out of nowhere Michael comes charging in. Took down two of the guys, then put himself between Derek and me. By then we could hear sirens getting closer. Derek swore and stabbed at Michael before running off. Michael just held his ground. Then, as soon as they were gone, he turned around and hugged me until the cops arrived. It wasn’t until then that anyone realized he’d been stabbed.” Paris stared straight into Cassie’s eyes. “He took a knife for me Cassie, and this is the first time I’ve had a chance to even begin to pay him back.”
All three of them were in tears by then, thinking about Michael’s courage and selflessness, and it took several minutes for everyone to compose themselves again.
“Anyway, enough of the history. Like I said we’re going to keep you safe. But that doesn’t mean keeping you locked up here out of sight and vegging in front of the cartoons for the next few weeks.”
“But if the police and everyone are looking for me…”
“Wrong answer!” Paris chortled. “They’re looking for Carl. We’re gonna hide you in plain sight, so welcome to Operation Three-Cee!” She declared triumphantly.
Both Cheryl and Cassie looked blankly at Paris until she threw up her arms in disgust. “C’mon guys, work with me here. Cassandra’s Complete Camouflage? Sheesh!”
As Paris explained it, Operation Three-Cee was the complete rebuild of Carl 1.0 into Cassandra 2.0. Hair, make up, voice, deportment, clothes, a little help ‘up top’. In fact everything a T girl her age could wish for.
“But I can’t let you do all that for me. It’s way too expensive!” Cassie complained.
“We’ll get by. This is for Michael.” Came the retort.
“No! If I need clothes and stuff I should pay for it. Heck, I need to order some more Spironolactone anyway, and Premarin now, I guess.”
Cheryl and Paris traded a look before turning back to Cassie. “Off the Internet?”
“I researched them first.” Cassie was immediately defensive. “It’s not like I could go to a doctor.”
Paris thought for a long moment before turning back to Cheryl. “Doctor Zeebowski?”
“Bloodwork, shots, scrips and limited ethics? Not cheap.” Cheryl replied.
“Um, guys? How ‘not cheap’?” Cassie asked.
“Sorry hun, but unless you’ve got eight to ten thou spare, you’re going to need our help.” Paris tried to let Cassie down gently.
She wasn’t expecting the girl to grin at her.
“Wait here.” She ordered, then took off up the stairs like a shot.
When she came back she was carrying an envelope like it was the Holy Grail. “I guess Michael never told you about my first business did he?” Cassie asked. “No? Well, I acquired a large stock of old comics when our neighbor moved away, and started selling them on eBay. All but a couple that I kept back for a rainy day. This one is ’Tales to Astonish’ issue 27 from 1962, in very good condition. If I went to a dealer I’d probably get at least twenty thousand dollars. Sold on eBay or something? Up to fifty thou I guess. Would you guys be interested in helping me turn this into cash? I’m happy to offer a ten percent commission over the first twenty thou to my agent.”
Cassie placed the comic carefully on a side table away from their drinks. “So, now we’ve solved the money problem, do you guys want to tell me about this Doctor Zeebowski and how you come to know him?”
Paris was the first to recover. “You are just a real bundle of surprises aren’t you young lady?” She laughed, then got serious again.
“I work for an actors’ agent here in Hollywood. Most of the time it’s just hustling the studios, looking after PR, wading through contracts and managing the client’s image. Occasionally however we need to provide some ‘special’ services. For example a little medical ‘booster’ to keep the client ticking along during a tough shoot. Nothing illegal!” She hastened to assure Cassie. “But maybe not what a doctor with your average HMO would be willing to prescribe. That’s where Doctor Zeebowski comes in. A number of agents and studios have used him. It’s just that we don’t like to admit it. You interested?”
“Heck yes!” Cassandra cheered, then paused. “Um, Paris? Do you know any other ‘interesting’ people? Like maybe someone who could get me an solid ID, like a driving license?” She asked hesitantly, wondering if she was being too pushy.
“I thought you were fourteen?”
“Like you said, they will be looking for Carl McCarrick, fourteen year old. If the ID said eighteen and had a different name that wouldn’t be an issue. It’s not as if I’m not planning on driving.”
“You are going to be the death of me missy!” Paris declared with a chuckle. Then the three of them settled down to plan out what else they could do to make Cassandra 2.0 a reality.
Cheryl and Paris cherished their Sunday mornings. It was the one day of the week when neither of them routinely worked, and a chance for a long snuggle followed by a leisurely brunch. Cheryl blinked sleepily while her partner still slumbered on, cuddled into her arms as the morning sun started peeking through the blinds. She loved seeing Paris’ hair a disordered mess fanning out over the pillow. Cheryl knew that Paris would curse it later, but Cheryl always enjoyed gently stroking and teasing it while her lover slept.
She was not expecting the piercing scream that suddenly flooded the house. Without thinking Cheryl leapt from the bed, dumping Paris from her embrace. She ripped open the bedside drawer to snatch up her ‘phone and the can of mace they kept there, before sprinting down the landing. Again a child’s desperate scream echoed through the house, spurring Cheryl onwards. She smashed through the door of their young guest’s room and stared in panic to see the bed disordered and empty.
“Cassie!” She shouted, quartering in the room with her eyes. “Cassie!”
Then, in the corner, wedged between the dresser and the bathroom door she caught sight of a bundle of mewling, quivering blankets. Cheryl quickly scanned the room again for any threats, then swiftly stepped to clear the en suite as well. Once she was happy no one else was there Cheryl let out her breath and tossed both ‘phone and can onto the bed.
“Cassie?” She eased slowly towards the shivering, sobbing child, then dropped to her hands and knees. “Cassie honey? It’s me, Cheryl. You’re safe honey. It’s okay.” She murmured softly.
“It’s my fault. It’s all my fault. I’m evil. I’m a foul sinner.” Cassie whispered to herself between sobs.
Cheryl eased carefully alongside Cassandra. She tentatively eased her arm around the child’s shoulders. “No you’re not sweetie. You’re loving, brave and loyal, and a good person.”
“I’m not! It’s my fault Mom died. It was God’s punishment for me being a freak. I promised Mom I’d look after Kath, and then I ran away and deserted her. It’s my fault Charlie got hurt. I should have stayed home and stopped them.” Both her voice and the sobbing got louder as Cheryl tried to pull the child into her arms.
“I’m a coward, an evil freak. I failed everyone. I don’t even look like a girl. Grampa was right. I deserve to die and burn in Hell!” Cassie’s voice rose to a shriek just as Paris came into the room.
“CASSANDRA McCARRICK! STOP THAT RIGHT NOW YOUNG LADY!” Paris’ loud bark shocked both Cheryl and Cassie to stillness. Paris dropped to her knees in front of the two of them.
“LOOK AT ME CASSANDRA.” Paris demanded. Her voice stern and uncompromising.
Guiltily, a red rimmed eye peered out from the bundle Cheryl was hugging.
“Is Michael a bad person?” She continued.
Confused, Cassie shook her head.
“Do you think he would adopt you as his sister, care for you and work to keep you safe, if he thought you weren’t a good person too?”
Cassie dropped her head.
“No! I want an answer.”
“I guess not.” Cassie whispered.
“Who was it who got Kath away and took her to safety yesterday? Who was it who stood up for your sister when no one else would, even against your Dad? Who was it who risked herself to get the evidence to put Charlie’s attackers in jail?” Paris reached out to capture Cassie’s hands from within the blankets.
“Was your Grampa a medical doctor? Or a scientist who had studied Gender Dysphoria?” Paris continued, “or was he a nasty bitter old man who twisted the message of the Bible to suit himself and bully his congregation?” She huffed. “I already know the answer to that one. Michael told me all about your Grampa. Remember, my Mom and Dad believed the same cr…ud, and forced it down my throat too.” Paris let out a deep sigh.
“He lied to you Cassandra. He lied again and again. Bullying all the children, and the adults, in his church with his lies, over and over, until you started to believe what he told you. What he did to you was brainwashing. Cassie, believe me, that’s what happened to you. I should know. It was the same thing that happened to me.” Paris paused to capture Cassie’s eyes with her gaze once again.
“You are NOT evil. Your Grampa lied.”
“You are NOT a foul sinner. Your Grampa lied.”
“You are NOT going to Hell. Your Grampa lied.”
“God did NOT kill your Mom because of you.”
“You did NOT desert your sister. You got her to safety, then took a very brave choice to keep her safe, despite how much it hurt you.”
“Most of all, you are NOT a freak.” Paris squeezed Cassie’s hands to reinforce her message.
“Now let me tell you who you ARE. You are a very brave girl with a plumbing problem. Which we will get fixed. You have had a truly awful forty-eight hours that most adults couldn’t have coped with, but YOU did. You struggled to do the right thing and keep those you love safe, regardless of the cost to you. And YOU achieved it, ALL of it. And now this morning, it all came crashing home, didn’t it?”
Cassie let out a little whimper as she ducked her chin.
Paris’ eyes softened. “Sweetie. It’s okay, truly. To be honest I expected this last night. No one can keep going under the pressure you have had to deal with. Sometimes you have to let go. Cassie?” Paris squeezed again. “I’m glad you let go, here, with us. It means that at some deep level, you know you are safe here, and that you can trust Cheryl and I. It’s going to get better from here on Cassandra. I promise.” She grinned as she watched a glimmer of hope re-enter Cassie’s eyes. “Now, my knees are getting tired, so what do you say we get up and showered, then I rustle up my famous Eggs Benedict?”
Cassie shamefacedly made her appearance at breakfast just as Paris was serving up.
“I’m sorry for scaring you guys.”
“Hey! Enough of that. You needed it. We all get a bit emo at times. We’re allowed, we’re girls!” Cheryl snickered. “Anyway, dive in before Paris snags your plate from in front of you. She’s an Eggs Benedict addict.”
“I am NOT that bad!” Came the frosty response from the stove.
Cheryl leant over to Cassie and whispered loudly “Only every time she cooks them.”
“Harumph!”
After breakfast was cleared away Cassie was directed to stay at the table as the others grabbed paper and pens.
“Plan of action!” Paris declared. “Operation Three-Cee is a go! So what do we do first?”
Cassie put her hand up. “Um, could I get a message to Kath and Aunt Megan please? Just to let them know I’m safe?”
“Not quite what I had in mind, but we should be able to do that. Do you have their email addresses? Yes? Okay, welcome to the murky world of press leaks. Of course I would NEVER do anything like this for a client,” Cheryl stifled a smirk at that. “but I’ve heard of these things called anonymous email services. You have a laptop? Great! Well, according to a friend,” Paris winked, “you go to a service like guerillamail.com and either cut and paste, or type your message directly into their website, and then hit send. Voila! Instant untraceable email!” She grinned.
“Now, I suggest that for the rest of this morning we let Cheryl loose with her garden shears and magic box of paints on your tender person and see if we can ‘reveal the inner you’ as the slimming ads go.” Paris decided. “Whilst that’s going on, I’m going to grab your measurements then go rampaging through the nearest mall to get you some snazzy threads!”
Cheryl rolled her eyes. “Don’t worry Cassie, she only thinks she’s a seventies rock chick sometimes. No one’s said ‘snazzy threads’ since Neil Sedaka had a number one.”
Cassie was momentarily derailed. “Uh, Who?”
“Seriously ancient Pop star.”
“So how come you’ve heard of him?”
Cheryl grimaced. “Dad Karaoke on road trips.”
“As I was saying,“ Paris continued, with a quick glare at her partner, “once you’re looking fabulous, we’re ready for Monday morning and the start of the shortest, most brutal charm school in history. You, my girl, will get your very own evil drill sergeant to put you through your paces. Namely Moi! ”
“And now she’s channelling Miss Piggy.” Cheryl whispered.
“After lunch we will be going for a drive to the bank, and then on to meet ‘my leetle friend’ with a camera and an interest in inventive artwork techniques. Any ideas on a name yet hun?”
Cassie bit her lip for a moment. “How does Cassandra Marie Metherick sound?” She suggested, spelling out the last name.
“Hm, in-ter-es-ting. Want to explain why you chose that?”
“Well, ‘Marie’ is from Mom, and ‘Metherick’ sounds and looks ‘sorta’ like McCarrick and is the same length, so if someone mishears it, or can’t read my writing it’s not my fault.” Cassie glanced shyly at the two women.
“Ooh, devious. I like it!” Cheryl clapped her hands.
“Moving on.” Paris continued, having jotted down the details. “For the rest of the week you can chill out and practice your girly bootcamp lessons while Cheryl and I are at work. We might head over to the mall one evening as well….”
“Uh, Paris, could I get a new pre-pay debit card for Cassie Metherick as well? Oh and a new disposable ‘phone? I really don’t want to use either of my current ‘phones again.”
“Good idea kiddo. Make it two ‘phones. We can also load up the new card from the proceeds of your comic once that’s sold and the medical and, ahem, ‘artwork’ bills are paid. Cheryl can you handle that?”
“If Cassie can talk me through what to do with the comic. Yeah, I think so.”
“Great! Now, Friday your new plastic should be ready. Would you mind a simple Cali ID with your age being eighteen, rather than a full driver’s license? If you look as young as you do, the Cops tend to look harder at full driver’s licenses, or anything showing you as over twenty one.”
“Uh, sure.”
“Right, final thing. I’ll set up a meeting with Doctor Zeebowski for Saturday morning so you can use your new ID. I’ll cover the costs for you. He’s used to that. We can then get everything from the pharmacy that afternoon. Any questions?”
Again Cassie raised her hand, looking nervously at her hosts. “Paris? Cheryl? When we go see Doctor Zeebowski? I wonder if…?”
“What is it hun? Go on, we won’t be upset.” Cheryl stroked her arm reassuringly.
“Well, we agreed hormones yeah?” She waited until they both nodded. “But if things go wrong and I end up getting caught by Children’s Services, they will force me to stop the Spiro and ‘mones won’t they?”
Paris nodded somberly. “They say they want to do what’s best for the child, but there’s a bunch of nasty old farts in there that absolutely will do everything they can to block any treatment for gender dysphoric kids in care. What are you thinking?”
“Well, two things. First if I’m on hormones and blockers ‘till I’m eighteen, there’s a risk of cancer of the balls isn’t there? Second, without the Spiro. I’ll get testosterone again. So, as I’ve sorta got money now, why not go for an orchidectomy? That way there’s no cancer risk, and nothing Children’s Services can stop later.” Cassie looked between them hopefully as they considered her bold suggestion.
Paris and Cheryl shared a long thoughtful glance, but it was Paris who eventually answered her.
“Cassie, sweetie? That’s a heck of a decision to make. But I can see your reasoning and, to be honest, I would have done exactly the same at your age if I’d had the chance. The problem is that, if Cheryl and I help you do this, we could both end up in Jail. Do you mind if we take a few days to think about this hun?”
Cassandra offered a quick smile of thanks as they wrapped up their planning session. It wasn’t the answer she’d hoped for, but she could see their concerns and they hadn’t said no. She could wait.
Meanwhile she had an email to write to the Munchkin.
By Sunday lunchtime Aunt Megan was bone tired. She hadn’t slept at all well last night, and the last twenty four hours had been incredibly stressful.
First was the panicked call from Brian McCarrick.
Then came the angry demands that she bring Kath straight back home, and disbelief that she didn’t know where Carl was. When she refused the first, and denied the second, the demands quickly turned to threats.
The first Pasadena PD officer had turned up at eleven o’clock that night. Megan had shown the young officer the videos on Cassie’s spare USB and handed over the sealed envelope, explaining that the LAPD officers might not have moved in to arrest the McCarricks yet.
After he left, promising to speak to his colleagues in LA, the calls from Brian started coming every hour. Eventually she silenced her ‘phone and checked her door and windows were locked and bolted. Then settled down into an uneasy half sleep, worried about her… nieces? Yes, she decided, her two nieces.
Right now she was blearily dragging herself to fix lunch, so Kath’s sudden excited squeal nearly made her drop her coffee mug.
“Aunty Meg! He.. I mean ‘she’ is safe. She’s written us!” Kath yelled as she dashed into the kitchen clutching her new laptop. “See! She’s safe!” Kath all but pushed the screen in front of Aunt Megan’s nose.
Dearest K,
I miss and love you and Aunt M so so much.
So you know it’s really me, you’re Munchkin and I’m 3B.
First, I’m safe. I mean really really safe.
The police now have the evidence. They should move soon I hope.
This email may look weird but it’s untraceable. I can email you but you can’t back. Sorry. I’m looking for a better system, but it will take time. I’ll write again real soon.
Lots and lots and lots of Love to you and Aunt M.
OXOXOXO to both of you.
C.
p.s. Don’t use or show the name in the letters I wrote to anyone except Aunt M. In fact, burn the letters.
p.p.s Shop around lots for comics. There’s lots of different prices ;)
p.p.p.s. I will be back. I promise. First got to deal with the courts and police and stuff so no guarantee on how soon.
p.p.p.p.s. Show this to Aunt M. Safer for her if she doesn’t get email from me directly ’til the cops, lawyers and CS Nazis are out the way.
p.p.p.p.p.s. Best delete this email as well.
Megan finished reading, carefully put her mug on the side. Then she wrapped her arms around a hyperactive Kathleen, closed her eyes and sagged into her grand niece’s excited hug with abject relief.
Tuesday evening brought Michael knocking on Paris’ front door.
“Hi guys. Sorry I haven’t been for a few days.” He bounded into the hall to give both Paris and Cheryl a hug. “I thought it best to stay away with all the cops rushing around back home.” Michael looked around inquisitively. “So where’s my li’l sis?” He asked.
Shyly, Cassandra peeked her head round from the kitchen. “Um, hi Michael.”
“Cassie! There you are! Come on out where I can get a look at you.”
Nervously she stepped into the living room area and looked down at herself uncertainly. She didn’t have any need to be. Cheryl had demonstrated her reputation as a top rated stylist, leaving Cassandra with a layered bob that perfectly framed her face. She’d also spent time teaching Cassie the basics of effective makeup, so the girl was already able to apply an elegant, understated look that made the most of her eyes; without resorting to the typical teen efforts requiring a plasterer’s trowel.
Michael smiled as he admired how natural she already looked. Wearing cut-off jeans and a tee, she was maybe a bit tomboyish, but no different from many of the teen girls he saw cruising the malls. Well, apart from that adorable shyness.
“Hey, looking good li’l sis. Doesn’t your big bro get a hug?” He asked holding out his arms.
A smile lit up Cassie’s face and she rushed into his embrace.
Paris noted the obvious friendly affection for the new girl in Michael’s eyes. ‘Yeah, he truly is a good guy.’ She smiled to herself.
She also noted the way Cassie had lit up at his praise, a look of hero worship on her face as she hugged him closely. Paris kept her face smooth. ‘Michael is going to have to be careful. It wouldn’t take much for Cassandra to become besotted with him.’ She decided, and resolved to have a quiet word with Michael about that later.
Eventually they all made themselves comfortable on the couches. Cassandra staying close to Michael’s side as they settled.
“So what news do you have for us?” Cheryl asked after serving everyone tea.
“Well, your old house was crawling with cops on Sunday. I didn’t see it, but when Peter came over he mentioned he’d counted half a dozen cruisers parked outside. “Your family…”
“NOT ‘my’ family!” Cassie interrupted hotly. “Kath and Aunt Megan are my family. Not those… animals!”
Michael draped an arm over her shoulders. “Okay, your birth father and brothers. That okay?” He asked with a glance, waiting a moment until she settled back down. “Anyway, they were arrested Sunday morning and the police started doing a number on the house. Yesterday they started interviewing all sorts of people. They came and spoke to Mom and Dad and also made arrangements to speak to Charlie.”
“Charlie?” Both Cassie and Paris yelped. “Is he awake? Is he going to be okay? How is he? When did he wake up? When can we see him?”
Their questions ran together so quickly that Michael had to hold up his hands in surrender. “Whoah ladies! Slow down. Yeah, they brought him out of the coma on Sunday. I got to see him last night. He’s not a pretty sight right now, but he’s fully alert and talking a bit when the pain meds let him. There’s some facial work he’s going to need another operation for later, but apart from that, he should make a full recovery. As for visiting, give him a week or so. He’ll be in hospital for a few weeks yet.”
Michael took a sip of his tea before continuing. “I wasn’t there when the cops came to speak to Mom and Dad. As I said, I’ve been keeping out of the way. However, they do want to talk to me, particularly about you Cassie.”
Cassie shivered. “What are you going to tell them?” She asked with a worried frown.
“We’ll talk about that in a bit after I’ve given you all the news. The cops wouldn’t tell Mom and Dad much except that all five of the ‘alleged attackers’ had appeared before the judge and been granted bail, which we were expecting. However, the story did make the local paper yesterday morning. Here.” Michael placed a copy on the coffee table where all three girls could see it. “The online version includes the usual police appeal for information and contact details. I copied that down for you as well.”
Cassandra sniffled as the sight of Moms name caught her eye. She wished they hadn’t dragged Mom’s memory into the article, feeling vaguely angry with the reporter who did so.
Beside her Michael went on. “I guess they have already spoken to your Aunt Megan, because they specifically asked Mom and Dad about where you were, but nothing about Kath. The investigating officers left a card for me to call and arrange to speak with them.” He handed Cassie a business card.
A frown furrowed her brow for a moment before Cassie took off upstairs. She came back a few moments later with a notepad and pen. “I guess I better get in touch and let them know I’m safe and don’t want to be found until those fu.., sorry, ‘alleged attackers’ are safely locked up.”
Cassie handed the card back to Michael. “Do we know how soon it will go to court?”
Paris jumped in at that. “It has to be under sixty days, but it may be faster if they try for a plea bargain.” She noticed everyone looking at her. “Hey, I work for a bunch of prima donna actors. No one claimed they were saints!” She snorted.
“Cassie?” Cheryl looked across at the girl. “The police may want you to give evidence honey. They may not be able to get a conviction without it.”
Cassandra’s frown returned. “If they can’t get a conviction with the video footage, the blood stained clothes and the baseball bat, covered with both their and Charlie’s DNA, they don’t deserve to be cops.” She declared firmly. “I included everything, as well as a video testimony and photographs of every step I took recovering all the evidence. What more could they want, other to put me on the stand to be ripped apart by a bunch of lawyer attack dogs, before dumping me on Children’s Services and forgetting about me?” She shuddered at the thought and then turned to Michael. “What are you going to tell them about me?”
Michael shrugged, then rehearsed his statement. “I haven’t heard from Carl since a week last Saturday when he left me a message about a threat to Charlie. He said he was away until Thursday, and I didn’t get back to Harbor City until Wednesday afternoon. Then, with everything going on with Charlie, I was busy. I tried to call him Sunday after Church when I heard about the arrests, but his phone was off.”
He watched the tension drain from Cassie’s body and tightened his arm around her shoulders. “Cassie, I said I’d keep you safe. Turning you over to the cops, and at the mercy of a bunch of lawyers, won’t be keeping you safe.”
That evening, after Michael had headed home, Cassie sat in front of her computer and composed another email to Kath, hopefully reassuring her and sending her love again. It felt so disconnected and wasn’t what she wanted, but right now it was the best she could do. That sent, she prepared another email using the police appeal address that Michael had provided. It was short and brutal.
From: [email protected]
Subject: Charlie Braybrooke attackers – witness
In the evidence pack I provided you, the red USB thumb drive has five files. File #3 shows my brother James shoving a baseball bat up his right sleeve. You will have found the bat behind the dryer in the cellar wrapped in a yellow garbage bag.
I am Carl McCarrick.
Despite doing my civic duty I don’t trust you to keep me safe.
I don’t trust the courts or lawyers, and I don’t trust Children’s Services.
I am safe, hidden from ALL Charlie’s attackers, and healthy.
Do NOT try and hunt me down. You have enough evidence.
I will be in touch again only when all five are convicted and in jail for a long time.
Cassie pasted the address and message into the browser window, paused a moment, then hit send. Now she just had to stay safe until her former family members, she refused to refer to them as ‘Brother’ or ‘Dad’, were all in jail. Then she could keep her promise to Mom.
And of course, she had a plan.
Comments
Nice Chapter
I didn't stay on Spiro long for the same reasons you give in the story. I found a Urologist that did the Orchiectomy for $1000.
I am very concerned that the assailants will attack Kath and her aunt eventually.
This is some nice work.
Gwen
Excellent chapter.
What you say about the police and S.S. (Never sure if S.S., stands for Social Services or Schutz-Staffel.)
In my book it mean't pretty much the same thing. To me Both Police and the S.S., were things to be avoided at any cost! Even if that cost amounted to injury or even death!!! Even with recent experiences with other children I have tried to help in latter days, I find over sixty-seven years of long bitter experiences that the care services remain essentially transphobic, homophobic and basically dishonest. I have documentary evidence of South Wales social workers blatantly lying to judges and falsifying medical evidence!!!
NEVER trust a social worker!! The police might (just might - only just might - be getting a little bit better but my jury is still out on that!) However, my advice about Social Workers still stands. Never, trust trust them!
Wow, thank you...
...for another great chapter.
This was luckily not in any way as traumatic as the previous two chapters.
Fabulous that Micheal had the contacts to provide a place for Cassie to be kept safe, and to feel like she has a support system and is truly being cared for.
Of course, they are out on bail, damn pathetic legal systems all over the fucking planet, not that this is real, but I have been in a situation where a trans friend of mine was beaten within an inch of death and the cops had all the proof for who did it. But because she was trans, according to them, she deserved it. I wonder if he spent more than a week in jail...
As always looking forward to the next chapter. Hopefully, these bastards will pay a hefty price for what they did to Charlie.
Thank you again.
but it is the rare moments of beauty and peace
in between the chaos,
That makes it worth living."
- Tertia Hill
This Story
This story keeps getting better and better with each chapter. I love the plot and the characters. You make me flock to the site every Monday and Friday as early as I can to catch a new chapter :).
OMG
A fantastic chapter. Carl is officially dead and Cassandra is living life. She did the right thing by protecting Kathleen and Megan the way she did. The demands of Brian would be correct. I am surprised that he didn't pound on Megan's door demanding Kath and Carl be returned to him. Yeah, He could do it know but risk revocation of his bond.
I would have loved to read the letter that Cassie wrote to Kath. Coming out is a hard thing. I did it by letter to my counselor. It was one of the hardest thing I have ever did but now glad I did.
So what is next for Cassie. Will she be hounded by the cops, for Carl to testify against the attackers. Will Cassie be there to see first hand her former father and brothers being hauled off for a long vacation in the gray bar motel?
Can't wait for next chapter(s) Kymmie
Great Chapter!
Michael definitely knows what he’s doing in hiding Cassie with people her “ family” would never think to look at. It’s also great that he hooked her up with Paris and Cheryl because they have the skills and experience to mold her into a young lady who no one would ever connect to Carl . As all of us expected , Aunt Megan and Kath have nothing but love for Cassandra and when they finally are reunited, it will be a joy to see them come together as a family . Aunt Megan believes and knows that she has two nieces and Kath knows and loves that she has a sister ! The sooner the 5 scumbags responsible for the attack are off the streets for good, the better it will be for all of them ! Cassie is right about the amount of evidence she provided the police. There should be more than enough to put them away without her even needing to testify in court . Cassie and Paris both understand that even in the supposedly more tolerant California child welfare system , there are undoubtedly , people with the ego and ideology that subscribe to the “no hormonal or blocker intervention “ theory for trans kids even if the medical evidence and opinions of people far more qualified have shown otherwise . With the expected windfall from the comic book sale , she should be able to more than cover her transition cost . I also have no doubt that her brilliant mind will also come up with more business ideas that will be even more lucrative with the help of Paris and Cheryl and their connections in Hollywood and among the high rolling crowd .
Another Americanism...
It would be called a Trash bag or garbage bag, not a bin liner. Otherwise this chapter is well done. As a curiosity, I looked up that issue. First issue featuring Ant-Man. Interesting. and it was as high as 1.5 million on a couple sites. (Presumably that's a near mint copy, but all in all that book might have been under valued by Cass.)
Another goodie
Yep, still enjoying the story. It's getting quite good. A real page turner.
Bail
So, for you legal experts out there, why have these foul pieces of biological material not been prosecuted as a hate crime? I believe the Feds can even weigh in on this for that.
https://www.fbi.gov/investigate/civil-rights/hate-crimes
Hate crime
Actually, we don't know what they were charged with. That decision belongs to the District Attorney, not the police. And, even if charged with a hate crime, they still could be granted bail. Unless the court believes they are flight risks, they probably would be granted bail, though it could be a very high amount.
Usually the US Attorney wouldn't prosecute charges duplicating state charges unless somehow they were acquitted in state court, and the US Attorney believed they deserved time in jail.This is what happened in the Rodney King case, but it was unusual at the time, and it still is.
I guess Cassie will now be
BBS - Best Big Sister.
This is a really great story, now I'm re-reading the Frozen Balance.
Cassie doesn't want to be a Bulletin Board Service :)
Actually Kath will come up with a new name for Cassie.
Three-Ess.
The bad news is that she won't tell Cassie what it stands for for ages. (three weeks on Monday)
Persephone
Non sum qualis eram
Oh no
She should have done more research on the police. Her "dad" probably is poker buddies with some of them. You cannot trust police, she should have went to the news, the evidence she gave is plenty but they want her so her "familyl" can get revenge on her.
Never trust cops, it's dangerous as fuck especially for a Trans girl. That might not be true world wide, I don't know but in the US, a good rule of thumb is ACAB
ACAB will keep you safe
I know who I am, I am me, and I like me ^^
Transgender, Gamer, Little, Princess, Therian and proud :D
BRILLIANT !!
Love, . . .you are ! Now back to reading a 3rd of the way thru this chapter !
johncorc1
Excellent chapter
All the right boxes were ticked so the complex chapter came alive for me. Cassie was just as believable, sly, and intelligent as she has been written throughout the story. Kath, Aunt Megan, and Michael et al. were also very well done.
I thought the copy of the newspaper clipping was especially well executed too. It looked extremely realistic to me, right down to the bleed through of the obverse type.
Great Story
Persephone I love this story. It is a little hard getting through the hateful parts without shedding a tear. Great job!
She seems to have covered all the bases well
Wonder if the prosecutor will stay competent, That is the weak link IMO.
Ooh!!
This is such a hard-to-put-down story! I’ve gotten really invested in Cassie’s character. Things are getting worse for her, but they’re also getting better at the same time. It’s funny how things work like that. I hope she and her sister can stay safe!! You’ve put together a really engaging story so far!!
A flower blooming
It's a sad testimony when people are hiding from the very people who try and help people, because of a few who would make a life miserable or put the person in harm's way.
It's also sad that if Cassie were to testify the defense would try and discredit her because she's TG, instead of advising their clients to plea due to the overwhelming evidence against them.
Michael is walking a fine line in saying he hasn't seen Carl. Officially Cassandra doesn't exist, so Michael would be lying if he says he hasn't seen Carl. But would this be any different than a person in witness protection?
Others have feelings too.
Taking this story in small doses, to make it last
Also, it's hard to read so much emotional material in one sitting.
I love Michael -- he's the man we wish so many men could be!
Kaleigh