I am repeating the afterword to my story "How I Became Crossgender" because I feel this is a better location for discussing questions, I hope it raises. Is Charli(e) crossgender? What is the danger/advantage of a cis-gender person pretending to be crossgender? What should the role of mental health professionals be?
Afterword
I do not see Charlie as transgender. To me, he is a cisgender male who grew up in femaleland. He is fluent speaking and acting feminine. When faced with the monumental task of moving into the real world, he finds himself more comfortable in the female role. I see this as simular to growing up speaking French and choosing a bilingual school rather than an English only. I think that girl is the right short term decision because it’s hard to get an education while in a continued state of fear.
I think the mental health professionals in the story are skating on thin ice, by intentionally misdiagnosing Charlie, even if the intent is to manipulate the situation to, in their minds, improve it for Charlie. My view is that this is akin to prescribing off label medication, not because they understand what it does or how it works or are aware of the side effects, but because they hope it might work. I would argue that people should be free to choose their gender presentation (clothes, hairstyle, vocal presentation, etcetera) freely and have the world accept that presentation, regardless of how close to an imaginary ideal it is. This decision should not require health official approval. But the real problem is the world acceptance.
I don’t have any answers here, only what I hope are good questions. I hope they get you thinking and generate some good discussion.
Comments
The way im seeing things
Is he is more gender neutral/Androgynous although more on the feminine side yes biologically male mentally leaning more female. Could it be the way he was raised? Environmental? The answer is possibly. Or it could be genetics. Whos to say science? Nothing is exact & what is normal? Womho defines normal? Society? Whatvif they are wrong? Whos to say they are wrong? Ifcyou speek up your an out cast for rocking the boat. Yes Charlie WOULD have a problem with public school as a boy or as a girl. In a private school well therecare ALWAYS those who think they are better then anyone else due to money, who daddy knows in office (the list goes on & on).
Love Samantha Renée Heart.
Cross Gender
I haven't finished your story yet simply because I get triggered and have to take a break. From your explanation, I think you are right on, and what you say is closely parallel to my own experience. I am not saying that there is no such thing as Transgender, only that I was not one.
I fired my lesbian mental health counselor of a decade because her counsel had become abusive. It suddenly dawned on me that she was attempting to control my thinking. This is no reflection on the LGBT folk at all, only that I am not one of that set.
At 72 no big change is possible after I've been doing this for 15 years.
Mental Health providers in the early 2000s had no idea how to deal with childhood abuse, and PTSD they didn't even know about. Had I been compliant, I'd have stayed on very heavy doses of Celexa, Wellbutrin and Trazodone and would have died of Kidney failure or would weigh 300 lbs. These days, I take a very light dose of Trazodone to sleep, and may discontinue that soon. The heavy drug doses were stopped in early 2008.
A few facts with no intention to "blame" anyone. I am XXY, and was raised as a girl until my stepfather stopped it. He and my brothers were such awful examples of males that I hated them and when I found out, hated being one. I was married to a man hater woman for 39 years who I had hoped that I could help. She'd been raped and abused as a child. I learned that you can't fix someone who does not believe they are broke.
For reasons I can not explain, I absolutely pass as a woman, this from several genetic XX women. I am not my best friend.
Given the incentive and experience, it seems clear that a male within the female size range can easily live as a woman.
Now, I will finish your story.
Thank you.
Gwen
I learned that you can't fix someone who does not believe they a
I lerned that you can't help anyone, who doesn't want help. Psychology always tries to fix people, as it was started to re-integrate those who do no fit into the general idea of society. I'd call that emotional rape.
Where woud the world be without those misfits like Gallileo and company? Still living in caves, I suppose, like some people mentally do even now.
Who sais that the "misfits" aren't the avant garde?
Monique.
Monique S
Non-op transition
Thanks, Gwen, I appreciate your thoughtful, and unique perspective.
I agree too much emphasis is placed on surgical transition. I feel the world would be better if non-op transitions were better accepted, either full-time or part-time (crossdress or as I prefer social transgender [to emphasize gender role in social interaction over clothes]).