Chapter 29

My first day of school. Eve and Gem wished me luck. Laura, on the other hand, took great care with me. We debated over whether it would be better to wear a wig or go with my striking short sides and pink middle. She was worried that it would draw some negative attention and so suggested a wig that was obviously a wig. It would still draw attention, but would allow me to take it off during gym and on a different day use a different wig that was less attention drawing.

Then my hair could be part of my fashion statement and accepted more readily. I only vaguely understood what she was talking about. Laura already had quite a collection of wigs and chose a snow white wig and had me practice fixing it myself. It went with a white bra, white shirt and black jeans. Very black and white.

Makeup was understated so it wouldn't need much to retouch. It was only when she was handing me the lipstick and mascara that she realised that I didn't have a handbag. Her handbag selection was astounding. I think she was a collector. I had to try all the black ones on until it passed the both comfortable and stylish test. Then she helped me fill it, knowing that I would have no clue what should be in it. The tampons and pads didn't surprise me. The extra two pairs of panties, just in case, did. Normally, she recommended one pair of panties and some supplies even if I wasn't due on. It was a girl code type of thing. It was likely that at some point in time you would find yourself caught short and the same was true for all girls, so having extra to help someone out was a good idea.

This was when she discovered that I also didn't have a purse, money or a phone. She chastised me for not asking or mentioning them. She dug through and found a suitable purse and put some cash in it. She told me she would sort out the phone for tomorrow. She also told me that if I wanted or needed anything I should just ask for it. She knew I was not after her for her money and I was going to be her daughter after all. She also suggested that I not start my business back up with Katie. To do so would present a risk that I didn't need to take. She had plenty of money so why take that risk.

I did feel a bit guilty for taking up so much of her time. She did seem to enjoy dressing me up, like a live barbie doll and I found myself smiling throughout the process. She wanted to go with me in the car, but knew that would be a mistake. So she gave me a kiss and a cuddle before sending me off in the limo. Since I had no phone the limo would be waiting from three pm, when the school was due to finish. I was going to be arriving early since I had a session with Dr Barn every morning until we worked out how well I coped.

My half hour with Dr Barn was not at all what I expected. We didn't go over the assault or any of my anxiety about men. She just wanted me to talk about myself. That was really awkward. I knew very little of Richard's life, so I had two choices. Stonewall her or talk about my life as Dillan, but call myself Richard. Stonewalling her would probably be the best option. I just couldn't bring myself to be that rude though. I just hoped that she didn't or couldn't check some of the things that I was saying against Richards real experiences. If she did, I could claim that I was lying because I didn't feel comfortable talking about it. Although, unless she was already suspicious, why would you question the names of my best friends and how would you. Since Richard had gone to an all boys school, I had to not talk about any of my girl friends. Surprisingly, that left me with very few boys to talk about. I knew the girls in my class quite well. The boys I only seemed to interact with during sport.

I was quite relieved when that was over and I could head to the principal's receptionist to get my schedule. Waiting for me with the receptionist was a tall, very skinny girl dressed very fashionably with heavy makeup. Her name was Ashley and she was a sophomore like me, with some of the same classes. She guided me to my first class while interrogating me. I could tell what she was interested in. In this school of the wealthy, your social standing depended on a number of things and the most important was how rich your family was. By telling her that I was staying with my Aunt who was working for someone wealthy, without divulging any names, her interest in me faded. My accent was hilarious, apparently. She asked about my parents and when I told her that I had lost them recently she offered me fake sympathy. That killed any possibility of a friendship. She guided me to a seat and then went elsewhere so that there was no obvious connection between us. She sat amongst other girls of a similar type and whispered about me. I could tell by the glances they all gave me. At the end of the class she was going to take me to the next one, but I told her, I considered her duty done and I could find my own way. She gratefully sped off.

Fortunately, I had enough academically to occupy myself. Maths was a breeze, English literature was fine, but it was about a book I hadn't read, and I was starting late in the year so there was a lot for me to catch up on. US history was interesting and I enjoyed it, however, again I had a big catch up ahead of me. I didn't manage to get Piano so I had a very boring Typing lesson before I could escape to lunch. I was very behind in typing as well, but no one was taking it seriously, so I didn't think that would be a problem.

The cafeteria was very interesting. The food was pretty good and I chose a nice pasta dish. Ashley and her group were all eating salads. The next question was where to sit. Lunch seemed to be a time you gathered by group. I wondered around with my tray trying to work out where I should sit. If there had been an empty table I probably would have just sat there. I did feel stares hitting me from all sides which is quite intimidating. I stayed away from any collections of large boys and found a girl sitting on her own. Her eyes were puffy, suggesting a recent bout of crying and she was sitting in a slumped dejected posture. Even so I thought she looked beautiful. I gently placed my tray opposite her and sat down. I have always hated seeing someone upset with an almost instinctive need to make them feel better. Jen had called it my paternal personality. I guess now I will have to call it my maternal sense.

She glanced up at me with a flick of her eyes before they went back to her food. “Are you new here?” She almost whispered, but I could still hear a faint French accent.

“Yes, my first day.” I replied brightly.

“That explains it.” She said morosely. “You're better off not associating with me.”

I was about to reply when I felt a hand on my shoulder. “Sophia, can I have a quick word.” Ashley said.

“Oh, hi Ashley. Sure, how can I help you?”

Ashley tried to suggest with her head movement that I needed to step away from the table to talk to her, but I pretended to not understand her. Keeping my expression open as if waiting for her to speak. Seeing that I was not responding how she had hoped, instead she brought her head really close to my ear. “She was one of those girls in the video of the gay room.” Then she looked at me expectantly.

I really didn't know how to respond to that. What I was thinking was...and.....because there had to be something else, surely. I mean, in this day and age being gay wasn't that big a deal and we were in California which I thought was pretty tolerant. So I carried on looking at Ashley expectantly, waiting for the rest. She just huffed, threw her hands up as if to say, well, I did my best and stalked off.

The girl in front of me kept looking at her plate. I thought I saw her eyes begin to tear up, but she blinked them back. I wanted to help this girl. I wanted to make her feel better. She was in a world of misery. Obviously she had wanted to keep this part of herself private and having it revealed in the way that it had, must have really hit her self esteem. I needed to do something, the question was what. I could whisper to her that I was a lesbian too. Then I thought, if I whispered it, that would also imply that there was something wrong with it. If I said it in a normal voice, yes that would indicate that I didn't see anything wrong with it, but there were enough people in hearing distance that I would be outing myself to the school. I knew that would cause me grief. Maybe it was short sighted of me, maybe I should have thought of something else that would cheer her up or let her know that she wasn't alone and there was nothing to be ashamed of.

I stuck my hand out. “Hi, I'm Sophia or Soph to my friends. I am a lesbian.” I didn't shout it and I didn't whisper, I just said it in what I would consider a normal tone of voice.

She looked up at me in shock.

I looked her in the eyes and then pointedly looked at my hand as if to say 'don't leave me hanging'. She tentatively reached forwards. “I'm Rochelle. Chelle to my friends.” She said in a tone slightly above a whisper. “You shouldn't have done that.”

“It's the truth and I'm not ashamed of it. Admittedly, I didn't really want to discuss it in public. I mean it is a private matter, not something that should concern anyone else.”

She looked at me a bit puzzled. “Then why did you say it?”

I leaned forwards gazing into her eyes. “I wanted to see you smile.” And there it was, a smile, gone so quick that if I wasn't looking for it, I wouldn't have seen it. “Mission accomplished.” I said softly.