Everybody struggles with life, even at the simplest times. My life just got flipped on its head, I had the choice to flip it or not, so I didn’t lose a family member or something like that… Well, I wish everyone in my family saw it like me.
I knock on my older brother’s door. “Hey Anthony, Mummy told me to tell you dinners ready, she also wants to know if you’ll be joining us at the table for dinner tonight?”
I heard a loud sigh coming from his room, “Tell mum I’ll be downstairs in about three minutes and I’ll eat at the table tonight.” I turn around and walk back downstairs with a huge smile on my face, I turn the corner to the kitchen, “Sweetie what got you so excited?” asks mummy as she gives me a hug from behind. I giggle the reply, “Well Anthony actually just spoke to me and you know what he said? He said he would eat at the table with us and daddy tonight.”
“Well isn’t that lovely darling?” mummy says to me, all I do in response is giggle and nod. “Now, go get ready from dinner darling, it’s almost finished cooking.”, I sigh then start running out the kitchen, “Ok Mummy I’ll be back in like five minutes.”
“She is so much happier and energetic like this, I’m so glad she told us how she was feeling.” My mother thinks to herself. In the bathroom a wash my hand, face and make sure my pigtails are still in tight. I walk into the dining room to find everyone sitting at the table waiting for me, I quickly take my seat. As I sit down Mummy and Daddy both get up to grab plates of food from the kitchen, while they’re in the kitchen I look over at Anthony who’s trying his hardest to ignore me. I ate my dinner quite quickly. “So, Daddy how was work today? Did you have fun?” I can see Anthony wince as I say the word, Daddy. “Well, work was…” “I’m going back to my room now,” Anthony mumbles as he heads to his room. “As I was saying work was fine sweetie.” Daddy replies. “Can I also go to my room please?”. Mummy and Daddy both sigh and nod, I get up and run up the stairs. Instead of walking into my room, I go over to Anthony’s door and knock. He grunts I take that as an invitation to go in. The surprised look on his face tells me he wasn’t expecting me to be the one at his door. “Anthony, why don’t you like me anymore?” I ask just louder than a whisper. He gives me a confused look, “Who told you that?”. “Well… umm… no one really told me I just kind of guessed because they way you’ve acted towards me since I became your sister. Do you not want me to be your sister?” I sniffle about to cry at the end of my sentence. He grabs me tight and says, “Of course I want you as my sister, it’s just a lot to get used to after having you as my brother for eleven years.”. I wipe my eyes, “It’s not like I’ve changed much it’s just I now wear different clothes to what a use to, but it’s still the same old me underneath.” He looks at me, “I know it’s just… wait no never mind, the last few days I haven’t shown you that I love or care for you so I’m gonna make it up to you by always making you feel wanted.” He kisses me on the forehead, I wrap my arms as tight as they go around his chest, “I love you, Anthony.” He looks down at the top of my head, “I love you too Jayde.” I giggle, that was the first time he has used my new name. After our hug, Anthony and I sit at his desk reading stories and playing games until I got to bed. “Goodnight Anthony see you in the morning.” He just waves at me. As I fall asleep I’ve got the biggest smile on my face I’ve ever had.
The End
This is my first story I’ve uploaded on here, so it’s probably really bad so if you have any advice or feedback feel free to leave a comment.
Jayde <3
Comments
not bad at all
cute & nice story, well written too
only advice I could give is; new paragraph for a new speaker
(but that could easily have been a html problem not a writing decision, so I'm not holding it against you)
so, well done, looking forwards to your next story
First Time
Nothing to be ashamed of. Keep going.
I like it
Because it speaks in an eleven year old's voice. It's simplified much as a child would look at things without dramatics. Just a kid asking her big brother what's wrong. There is an intuitive understanding by Jayde but not an overt one, that's left for her brother to explain. Who can resist sweet?
Commentator
Visit my Caption Blog: Dawn's Girly Site
Visit my Amazon Page: D R Jehs
Your first story
It's pretty good. Good enough to get my eyes watering. There is real dialogue. I liked it. Thank you.
One of these days I hope I get the courage to write a story and post it up here too. I haven't written a piece of fiction since my teens. Maybe. Some day.
'the biggest smile on my face "
wonderful! And welcome to Big Closet!
One of the mems
We teach in our support groups is no one really transitions alone. It is a family project
Paragraphing and blank lines
I liked the story; short but sweet. The only suggestion I have is to add a blank line between paragraphs so it isn't a solid block of text. The extra lines make it somewhat easier to read.
its sweet
very norman rockwell
ed
ed
sniff
Very sweet story.