Seven

I checked my closet. The bra and panty I hid in a bag on the closet shelf were still there. I wanted to go into the spare bedroom and look in the dresser drawer for the night gown. Either Mom or Sis changed the sheets. Neither acted unusual nor treated me different. I assumed it had to be Sis; Mom would have said something to me. I paced the room wondering what I should do.

There was a knock at the door.

“Yeah,” I didn’t open the door.

“If you are looking for the night gown, I put it in the top drawer."

I could tell by her voice, she felt uncomfortable. I didn’t know what to say. Should I just say thanks, and acknowledge I laid claim to the night gown? Should I act as if I didn’t know what she was talking about? Should I be silent?

“Is it OK if I come in?”

“Just a second,” I slipped my pants back on. “Come in”.

She opened the door and peeked in, “Do you want to talk?”

Being face to face with mom changed how I felt, “About what?” Playing stupid was silly.

“About you wearing a night gown and putting on your sister’s make-up,” She looked at me questioning, am I right. “Not to mention it looked like you tried on almost every outfit in the spare bedroom,” again that look.

I didn’t plan to cry. A tear ran down my cheek, “I’m sorry."
“For what?” She walked over and hugged me.

“I don’t know. I shouldn't, I’m a boy; I shouldn’t wear girl’s clothes,” I wiped my tears away.

“Do you know why you did?” She looked at my face. I saw a concerned mother.

“I don’t know why I did. I was curious,” I shrugged my shoulders. "After I started I couldn’t stop. Being a girl makes feel good."

“Interesting."

“What,” I expected a different reaction.

“You said being a girl, not dressing like a girl."

I thought she was splitting hairs, “Same thing."

She smiled, “I’m not sure how I would have reacted if I caught you in your sister’s clothes. I think I would have been upset. Since I discovered the hidden night gown I had time to do some reading." She brushed my hair back behind my ear, “From what I read there is a difference."

“What’s the difference?”

“A person who enjoys wearing the clothes is different from the person who enjoys being a female,” She motioned for me to sit.

I sat on the bed.

She went to the dresser and pulled out the night gown and handed it to me. I didn’t take it right away. She motioned for me to take it from her. I set it on the bed. “Why don’t you change; I’ll come back in a few minutes, then we can talk.”