Horizons of the Heart
By Melange
Copyright © 2013 Melange
All Rights Reserved.
Synopsis
Jaden learns some interesting things at the Convocation of Magi. Mirena and Rhyce enjoys a rare day without rain. Stann goes exploring, but digs himself too deep. Oleander and Jaden makes a disturbing discovery.
Flashback: A young Jaden waves his mother off as she goes on an important assignment.
Chapter 15: Sunless Sonata
sing a song to me
give me arms wide open
JADEN
Their feet made a soft padding noise as they raced down the hallway. The long carpet that kept the floor warm went almost the entire length from the dining room to the great balcony overlooking the steep mountainside. The doors to the balcony were always closed, to keep the chill of the mountain outside, no matter the season. Talraman was seldom a warm place.
“Dragon breath! You’re dead!” The black-haired girl made a roaring noise while holding out her arms stiffly as if they were wings and she was soaring.
“Nu-uh! I’m a golem, just like Master Whiskers!” The boy with the same hair and ears as his sister crossed his arms in front of his body as a shield.
“You’re stupid! Dragonfire melts golems!” The girl’s voice rose another octave, refusing to be beaten by such cheap tricks.
“No it doesn’t! Papa told me so!”
“Liar!”
“Cheater!” The boy tried not to let his sister get the last word in this time too.
The door next to the balcony opened up and a white-haired woman stepped out into the hallway with an expression of mixed amusement and annoyance. The children hadn’t noticed her yet, too focused on trying to shout louder than the other sibling. She crossed her arms and donned a stern mask.
“Lilya, Jaden! Garda’s fires, what are you doing?” Their mother put her hands on her hips and leaned forward when she had grabbed their full attention. “You know I was talking with councilman Ilduste today. It’s very important, and we can’t hear each other with all this yelling.”
“Well, I won,” Lilya declared proudly. She always strived to be the strongest, after all.
“No, you didn-“ her brother began, but was interrupted by their mother before it started another shouting match.
“Either play in your rooms, or go to one of your friends. Now, shoo, you hellions!” She kept her strict expression. Garen wanted rules in this household, and she would do her best to make sure their children understood that.
“Yes, mommy!” The girl, a year older than the boy, turned around and headed back to her room. Though she sometimes forgot herself, Lilya never had a problem with following the rules.
Her son remained in the hallway and looked at her with those big, brown eyes. He could probably use a bath.
“Did you want something, Jay?” She knelt down as the young boy ran into her arms.
“Lilya called me stupid, mommy!” Jaden burrowed his face into her grey and silver robe.
“Well, that’s because you are, Jay.” His mother said, remorselessly.
“What?!”
When Jaden looked up at his mother’s face, her serious expression slipped and showed her real self. Her special face she only showed her children sometimes, to Jaden more than his sister. His mother’s smile was all the warmth he ever needed.
“Got you there, my little raindrop.” She ran a hand through that black hair both her children had from their father. She couldn’t help but wonder about what people they would grow up into, but she had no doubt in that they would bring a breath of fresh air into the rigid society of the Lacunai. They may have their father’s colours, but they had her heart.
Before Jaden could reply, the man she had been talking with left the Tarasov’s receiving room with a soft whisper of his midnight robes and cleared his throat.
“Irissa? It’s time for us to leave now. We need the Dancing Tempest to handle the negotiations with the ambassador of Skyreach Eternal,” the aging man said, gesturing at the balcony doors. That was the way the children’s parents often arrived at their home.
“Oh, of course councilman. I’ll be just a moment,” Irissa nodded at the grey-haired mystic, and then turned back to the child in her arms. “Jaden? I want you to tell your father that I left for my big meeting as soon as he comes home.”
“Okay. When is he coming home?” Jaden tried to hold on a bit longer, but he had to let go when his mother stood back up.
“Who knows? Those dragons sure take their time talking sometimes, don’t they?” She snuck him another smile when the councilman wasn’t looking, and winked. She had already discussed her own trip with Garen, but giving their son an ‘important mission’ would make the boy feel better. “Be nice to your sister and aunt Sabel while I’m gone.”
“I wish you wouldn’t go, mommy.”
“I’ll be back before you know it, raindrop,” Irissa waved at her youngest child and joined the older man by the balcony doors. The chill of the mountain air rushed in with a wind as soon as the doors opened.
Irissa turned and waved at Jaden one more time, before she reached within and embraced her inner spirit. Her features became translucent and windblown as her feet left the ground, regretting how their duties so often kept them away from their children. Irissa of the Dancing Tempest floated away into the blue sky
The din of many conversations was loud enough that it was hard to make yourself heard in the main gathering hall. Some groups had already begun to make use of the several more private rooms set aside for such business. Eventually, a functionary that looked vaguely similar to the one who had taken Jaden’s name earlier struck a bell and announced that the first debate of the day was about to being in the auditorium, followed by the presentation on the latest expedition to the other continent by the esteemed Rune Seeker Sarzall.
“I wouldn’t mind sitting in on the debate, Mystic Hetagon,” Kellen confessed with an almost eager expression. “I understand it is Spellsinger Inadra, who apprenticed under Mirria herself, debating the ethics of mercenary magic with a spokesperson of the Arcane Order.”
“Yes, it will no doubt prove a very interesting discussion. They sent Torem Khemar to handle her. You know they’re expecting trouble when putting up a dwarf defence speaker. Let us go see what the conclusion will be.” Alam stroked his chin in thought, keeping a neutral face. His wings shifted a little as he changed his stance. “Lilya? No doubt you want to catch up with your brother. We will meet up here after the debate is over.”
“As you wish, Lord Protector,” the hard-eyed woman bowed her head. She glanced up after a while when Oleander hadn’t made a move to leave their side.
“Hi, I’m-“
“Apprentice! Come along now. Leave those two alone,” Kellen bellowed over the noise of dozens of magicians comparing their crafts.
“But-“
“Attend your master, girl!” Lilya hissed. She appeared offended by the disrespect Oleander was showing her ‘master’.
The redhead frowned a little, then looked up at Jaden and smiled. For a second, he thought she was going to say something else, but she just gave him a little wave before hurrying after the two men. The crowd willingly parted when Alam and Kellen walked forward. Jaden gave his friends one last longing look, before turning back to face the music.
“Lilya,” he began.
“Don’t you ‘Lilya’ me, you… you waste of skin!” She managed to restrain herself, just barely. His sister always had more of their father’s temper than he had. “Do you have any idea how ashamed we were when you just disappeared overnight?”
“I wrote a letter…”
“Burn the letter! You owe us more than that. What broke inside your head, and made you abandon all pretence at honour and just slink away from your duty?”
“You know what, Lil. You must’ve heard what… happened,” Jaden felt the embarrassment flush his face; if not for the veil, that is. He couldn’t get over how much the same they looked now, were it not for his disguise. They stood eye to eye, same hair, same ears. The eyes told a different tale now, though. His had only grown more golden, while Lilya’s sought the essence of stone.
“The mountain gives no more than what we’re expected to carry, Jay. But you dropped it at our feet, and now we had to carry it for you!” Lilya clenched her fists over and over, as if she was fighting a desire to pick her brother up and shake some sense into him. No violence would be tolerated at the convocation, however. That would get her expelled, and banned from future gatherings. “Show some bloody spine for once. Tarasovs don’t run, we stand and do what need doing.”
“You sound like dad, Lil.” Jaden searched his sister’s face for the girl she had been before.
“I’ll take that as a compliment. I expect you to return with us once we’re done here.” Lilya crossed her arms over her surcoat, pushing up the family crest that was draped across her chest.
“I… I can’t. I’ve got my friends here, and we’re doing… things.” He lied awkwardly. Several other lines had appeared in his head, unbidden, but it was bad enough lying to Lilya as it was, without starting to make up things completely.
“Dragon dung, Jay! I can see right through you. I always could.” Her finger was barely an inch from his chest, where the illusion just barely covered reality. The pupils of her hard amber eyes seemed narrower than normal, almost lizard-like. She had begun to drift, too. “There are only so many chances you’ll get, even with family. You need to stop burning bridges right now, or things will end up very badly for you.”
That hit him right in the heart. He was pushing everyone away. Mom, dad, Lil, his friends. Before he even knew what was happening, it all came rushing up. He covered his face with his hands as his shoulders shook.
The gathering hall was mostly empty, as magicians had left for private chambers, or the larger rooms where scheduled events took place. The ones who remained for various reasons, gave the siblings the privacy they needed. Nobody enjoyed seeing people weep in public.
Lilya watched her brother cry for a while, and then felt her shoulders slump down. She hesitated for a moment before hugged him close, feeling the illusion pass through her arms. It didn’t surprise her one bit. Nothing could stand up against her gaze, after all. It revealed the threads of magic with the same ease it showed the essence of stone inside every living thing, just waiting to be awakened.
“Jay, you’re a dummy.” She said, sighing at the scene he was causing.
“I know.”
“Happy birthday too, I guess,” Lilya said offhandedly.
“You remembered?” Jaden pulled back a bit so he could see her face. She still looked angry.
“Of course. It’s because I’m not stupid, like you.” She looked him over critically. “By the mountain, Jay, what are you wearing?”
"Something is wrong with me, Lil. I'm drifting too fast." How could she think about clothes right now?
"All the more reason for you to come back with us," Lilya squeezed his shoulders where she still held onto him.
"I can't. Didn't you hear what dad wants me to do?" Jaden didn’t want to think about that. Forget honour, there was no dignity in that.
"I wouldn't worry about father if I were you. Mother's furious with you for just leaving like that."
"Oh." Their mother was mostly calm like a cloudless sky, but once her ire had been awakened, it was thunder and lightning. Literally.
"We had bad weather for a week."
"I don't want this, Lil. I really, really don't want this." Jaden awkwardly touched a hand to his chest above his heart.
"Tough. This is who you are. What are you going to do about it?" His sister was all about tough love, which was made worse by how she often forgot the ‘love’ part of it.
"I thought that... Maybe here at the convocation, I could find some way of reversing this."
"Rejecting your spirit? That's unheard of, Jay." Lilya looked at him with something close to disdain. The bond between the mystic and the spirit was, well, sacred. Jaden was approaching blasphemy by Lacunai standards.
"I have to try something. I'm... losing myself." He had to try to make her see, somehow. There was something deeply wrong with his bond. Or right. Maybe it was too right?
Lilya let her hands fall to her side and regarded him silently with those stony eyes. She pursed her mouth in thought, which was a good sign. That meant she was considering it, at least.
"Please, Lil."
"Fine. Never say I didn't do anything for you. I'll run interference back home, but unless you're back by midwinter I'll hunt you down and drag you back myself. I've got your new scent now." She leaned forward and glared a bit to make her point. Jaden hugged his sister again, causing her to roll her eyes. "That just feels weird now, with you squishing up against me like that."
"Yeah, I know," Jaden laughed a little.
"You're lucky you have that minor veil. You're all blotchy right now."
"Garda's fires," Jaden cursed softly and wiped at his eyes. No one would see his face. No one except Lilya, that is.
"You sound like mother when you say that," Lilya commented coolly. Or was she amused? It was getting harder to tell.
"Well, she-"
"No, I mean, you literally sound like her. A cheap veil like that can't handle voices." She sniffed at the embroidered nymph kerchief tied around his head, in the guise of that nondescript hat.
"It wasn't cheap; I had to trade in my Talraman blade-"
"You did what?" Lilya's eyes flashed dangerously. "Why, I ought to petrify you where you stand! Father had promised that sword to me, since you were unfit for a protector’s duty. But you ran away with it! Where is it now?"
"I sold it in a curiosity tent outside Tier. Some Etrian trader with a lot of enchanted items, uh, and perfumes." Did he still have that bottle? He remembered enjoying that scent.
"Blight and bloody boggarts." Lilya rubbed her face to keep from strangling her brother. She finally settled on shooting him another angry glare. "That's just one more thing you owe me now, Jay. If I can't get it back, I'll find myself a statue to hang my clothes on. Hint. Hint."
Jaden sincerely hoped his sister would be able to find it. It wasn’t a very special sword. It was one of a hundred just like it, made to arm the Talraman protectors during the time when the mountain citadel was at war with the entire world. But it had been with the family ever since those long gone days, and trading it away hadn't been his proudest moment.
Their shouting hadn’t gone unnoticed however. A peacekeeping functionary eventually approached them, with a concerned expression. Once he recognised one of them as a member of the Mystics’ delegation, he kept a respectful — or fearful — distance.
"Is everything alright here, sir? Some of the guests feared an altercation might be imminent."
"No, everything's fine. Thank you. My sister is just telling me about her, uh-" Jaden glanced at his sister, their sibling bond waking up after having been asleep for a long time.
"Statue collection." Lilya said resolutely, in the same way a rector of Melat pronounced judgment upon the guilty.
"Right. Her statues?" Jaden winced a little.
"I... see. Very well. Try to keep it civil, would you kindly? We wouldn't want to have to ask you to leave."
"Of course. My apologies." Jaden tried to smooth things over.
"Walk away, human." Lilya frowned at the functionary. There would apparently be no smoothening.
The man did, with the studied patience of someone who had worked as a servant to nobles and other entitled people for most of his life.
"'Human'? Lil, we're human too, you know?" Jaden reminded his sister.
"Only about two fifth, by my count," Lilya shrugged a little. She always needed to be right.
"At least we're not elves." He pointed out.
"Actually..." Always needed to be right.
The sun was breaking through the clouds, and reached down with rays of warmth to the people in Farcrest’s streets. From her seat by the window, Mirena could see a woman passing by who unconsciously turned her head a bit upward to catch more of the light. Everyone sought the light in their own way.
“It seems a shame to spend the morning cooped up in the Old Hog,” Mirena told Stann, who was lazily pulling strips of meat from a piece of chicken and waving them in front of the innkeeper’s dog.
The spotty mutt tilted its head to the side, causing its long ears to swing a bit, but then lay back down by Rhyce’s feet. The archer hid a faint, lopsided smirk as he reached down and scratched its head.
“Thar is no better place t’ be, I’ll have yu know,” the dwarf wiped a hand on his leather apron and grabbed another mug from the tray to dry off. “Exceptin’ the emerald halls of the kingdom below.”
“No offense intended, keeper Turgar,” Mirena smiled at the stocky owner of the Old Hog Inn.
“Hmpf. And yu,” Turgar pointed a thick finger at Rhyce. “Give me back me fleabag! ‘e is supposed to be gerdin’, no rollin’ on the floor.”
The dog whined a little, and looked up at Rhyce.
“It is a nice day, for as long as it’ll last,” Stann commented, leaning forward a bit to be able to see out the window. “Maybe I should go see the sights of the city?”
“I feel like visiting the market again. There should still be a lot of activities on the day after the celebration,” Mirena mused, and brushed some stray hair back over an ear.
“I’ll come along,” said Rhyce. “I’ve been inside for too long anyway.”
The warrior bid the archer and the knight a pleasant trip, and headed off to explore. He had only looked at the nearby areas since they arrived, and felt like truly taking the measure of the capital of Alband in a way only a Northman could.
It really was a beautiful day. Many of the revellers from last night had begun to regain their senses, and had started to head outside as well. It wasn’t anywhere near as busy as last night, but Mirena and Rhyce found themselves having to wait their turns at some places. One street was even blocked off by two wagons heading opposite ways, with their drivers shouting at each other and generally causing a ruckus.
“That would never happen in Tier. The wagon streets were designed wide enough for two to pass side by side without having to resort to… to such profanities,” Mirena gestured back at the street they had just passed.
“Not every place has that luxury,” the archer said, as he held open the door to a jeweller’s shop. Mirena smiled and walked inside. “After all, while some aspire to gold, others will settle for coppers.”
“Witty, Rhyce,” Mirena approved with a small laugh. Tier was best known for its rich, almost golden stonework, and its high towers. Farcrest, on the other hand, started growing around a copper trade route.
While browsing the displays, Mirena thought again about last night. Before she left to serve the temple, she had resented her parents for making her go to such events, but now she found herself missing the music and the dancing. Maybe she would have to settle for copper, as well. To her surprise Rhyce had asked the storeowner to let him look closer at a slim silver chain of some sort. The archer held it in his hands for a moment, and then nodded to himself.
“That’s a very ladylike necklace, Rhyce. Who are you buying it for?” Mirena asked, as he was paying for his purchase.
“My wife,” Rhyce replied laconically, and glanced at the window to the street.
“Your-“ She followed his gaze, and lost her train of thought when a new customer stepped into the store. He was quite familiar, even though she only met him once before. She felt a smile claim her face. “Arim!”
“Eh? Oh, milady Mirena! What a surprise!” Her dancing partner from yesterday blinked a few times, and returned her smile in full. “It seemed like a nice day for a stroll, and here we are.”
“What are you doing here? Looking for a gift?” Mirena stepped closer, and failed to notice how her friend slipped past behind her, leaving the store.
“Yes. I mentioned how I had been left hanging as well, yesterday? Well, I thought I’d find a nice present for my niece once they show up.” Arim scratched the back of his neck, no doubt a little self-conscious to be caught in a shop catering to ladies’ jewellery by someone he had danced closely with just the other night.
“That’s very sweet of you. I’m sure she’ll love it. I can give you some suggestions, if you’d like?”
“Please! I’m not sure what girls like these days. Likely, I’d just buy something too expensive to make up for my lack of fine taste. My coins and I will be in your debt, for sure.” Arim laughed with some relief as tension ran out of his shoulders.
Outside the sun was drying up all the last drops of yesterday’s rain. Rhyce stood for a while, just looking at the blue sky. Then, he raised his hand with the silver chain. Some people passing by gave him a second look as he stood there, but soon a black bird swept down from the rooftops and carefully plucked the item from his fingers. It gathered itself and flew off again, heading west and inlands. Rhyce followed it with his eyes until he could no longer see it, and then he turned and walked the street alone.
Farcrest was a curious city. It wasn’t as sprawling as Etrana, what seemed to go on forever, or as resplendent as Tier, who sought to awe her visitors. Farcrest held onto good old Albander sense, but had simply scaled it up to fit a larger community. It was hard to be surprised by Farcrest. Streets led where they were supposed to go, and the different districts must have been planned ahead by some visionary architect of the ages. Or maybe the Albander had simply made a collective decision not to mess it up. Of all the capitals of the countries along the coast, Farcrest was no doubt the youngest, but after Alband breaking off from the empire, it had grown rapidly into the large city it was today. Stann could definitely appreciate a place like this.
Stann had spent most of the morning making his way around the other edges of the city, but aside from some fortifications there wasn’t a whole lot to see. It wasn’t until he decided to take the northern road back towards the inner city that he happened upon a large merchant’s wagon standing by the side of the street. He immediately recognised the style of a Northman wagon, and by the colours of their clothes, he’d bet his favourite throwing axe those were of the Ravenwing clan.
“Ho, blackfeathers!” Stann called out as he joined the small group of people inspecting the fine steel of the North.
“Well met, bloodsnow!” One of the older men replied, his dark blonde and grey hair braided back from his face. He probably had more hair on his chin than on his head.
“Showing the southerners how it’s done?” The winterheart warrior shouldered his way up to the front and grasped a heavy battle-axe in a hand. It was good, solid craftsmanship. He could almost feel the cold of his homeland inside that steel.
“Aye. The iron down here is so soft; we could use it to wipe our behinds!” The Ravenwing men laughed heartily.
Stann grinned as well, and looked across the rest of the people looking at the Northmen’s wares. He did a double-take when he saw the tapered ears rising out of silky blonde, almost white, hair. It framed a face that was cute for an elf, but beautiful to a human. She was inspecting some of the lighter blades, even holding one of them in her slender hands. He put on his best grin, and leaned casually against the side of the wagon.
“A lady after my own heart. Do you see anything you like?” Stann delivered his line with a wink.
The elven woman had the good grace to smile, even at such a crude pick-up line. She kept turning the slim blade over in her hands, though.
“Perhaps. I was too busy yesterday to visit these markets.” She had a wonderful, melodious voice too, and a very noticeable accent. “Preparations for our performance took priority, of course.”
“Ah, you’re part of the Sorun group?” Stann deduced as his eyes roamed a little. Not too much, though. He was a gentleman, after all.
“I’m with the Sona Sonorous, yes.” She admitted, one eyebrow pulling down a little as if she had touched something she rather she hadn’t.
“A heavy name for such a slender lady.” He was smoother than a greased boar. Some of the Ravenwing men groaned a little, but what did they know?
“It’s a translation. Some nuances might be lost.” The elven woman seemed undecided whether to put down the short sword, or use it.
“What do you call it in elf-speak?”
“Serecea Sonasirium” She said, reluctantly.
“Say something else in that tongue of yours?” Stann loved hearing the elves speak their own language. It felt like warm honey being poured into his ears.
“Perot.” With that, she firmly put the blade back on the pile.
“That was something dirty, wasn’t it?”
“Yes,” and with that, the elven woman left with a relieved smile.
Stann sighed as she walked away. That was one fine-looking woman. He was brought out of his budding fantasy when his countrymen gave him a slow applause.
“Well done, bloodsnow. That was inspiring.”
“Eh, shut your gaps,” Stann joked, and waved them off as he left as well. What did they know?
As the first, but greatly anticipated debate was done for the day, the audience began to filter out through the doors to the auditorium, forming into small groups to discuss what they had taken from the argument between Spellsinger Inadra and Sorcerer Torem. While they were walking back to where the Tarasovs had been talking, Alam Hetagon and Kellen was talking about their own views about the separation between the magical traditions and the states.
“The division is artificial and unnatural. Magicians are members of their people and culture, so why should they be forced to be set apart from their homes?” Alam spoke not with anger, but with the intense surety of a believer.
“Magic is the most powerful force we know of. No individual state should command something like that. Rulers are but people too, and can make mistakes,” Kellen argued according to the position that had brought the convocation into being in the first place.
“We shall just have to agree, to disagree then, rune seeker,” the winged protector of the mountain nodded with an amused twitch on his lips. Talraman represented, to a degree, a lot of what the debate had been about. A place where magicians ruled. Magocracy was a scary concept to many.
Oleander had the look of someone pushed to their personal limits of sanity out of boredom, and welcomed the chance to hurry back to Jaden’s side. Lilya gave her a frown as the redhead joined them.
"Lilya, this is my friend Oleander," Jaden introduced the two women, not having had the chance to properly do so before.
"Right. The rune seeker's apprentice." Lilya crossed her arms again, standing with her weight evenly divided, as if facing down an opponent.
"Hi! We didn't get a chance to talk before, but I can't get over how much the two of you look alike." The redhead couldn’t help glancing between the two of them. The kinship was very obvious.
"You have no idea." The stony-eyed woman looked at her brother, her gaze piercing through the illusion.
"Uh, I guess not?" Oleander shrugged a little.
"I need to get back to my duties now," Lilya glanced over at the Lord Protector of Talraman, who was about to head off to their next appointment. He was motioning at her to come.
"Hey, wait! Can I see your battle-shape?"
"My what?" She stopped and turned back around.
"She means manifestation," Jaden translated, covering his face with a palm. Lilya stared at the cheeky, short redhead for a moment.
"You're Olman, right? Have you heard the expression 'don't draw your bow unless you intend to shoot'?" Lilya's voice took on a growling undertone towards the end.
"Sure, it's a- oh. Right."
Lilya Tarasov gave the short woman another pointed stare, then turned on her heel and stalked off to join her superior. She said something to Alam, but they couldn’t hear it over the noise of dozens of people talking around the gathering hall.
"Your sister, she's kind of intense, Jay." Oleander admitted.
"Yeah, she always was." But lately, it had just grown more so. Whatever had happened in her spirit quest, it had honed the hard part of her to a keen edge.
"I can't help but think I've seen her before, though, somewhere." Oleander tapped her lip with a finger in thought.
"That's probably unlikely." Jaden couldn’t imagine a situation where the two would run into one another, aside from places like these. His sister had never been the adventurous sort, and felt that travelling was a bother.
"You know, you two sound a lot alike too. How's that throat of yours?" The redhead gave Jaden a look of concern.
"It's, uh, getting better," Jaden forced his voice into a lower registry. Just one more thing to worry about. He took note of Alam’s clothes, though. A design that allowed for wings might come in handy in the future. He was getting very tired of ending up topless whenever he’s forced to do something he desperately wanted to avoid. It just seemed like an extra pinch of salt on a raw wound.
While Kellen happily went from room to room during the following hours, sometimes bringing Oleander along for an “educating experience” much to her protests, Jaden spent it talking with other magicians of many other traditions. Since his questions might raise some strange questions, especially coming from a mystic, he fell back on what felt natural — Jaden lied. Pretending to be an elven sorcerer interested in transformation magic was easier than he imagined, but he tried to avoid speaking with other sorcerers anyway, just in case there were some subtle tells he would miss.
Some of the men and women he managed to speak with, when he managed to catch them between events, would refer him to the Mystics’ envoy. Quite ironic, he had to admit, but they were considered to be the best “shapeshifters”.
One particular rune seeker mentioned seeing some very fascinating frescoes while conducting an exploratory dig outside Bul Isra, an elven city on the far side of the Sorun wildlands. According to those ancient texts there were a caste of elven magicians called the Arat Duar, who walked a path somewhere between the priests of the Five Temples, and the shamans of the North. Or, maybe the other way around, since the elven geomancers came well before either of the others. The inscriptions spoke of these elves who could use magic to alter both living things, and the inanimate.
“Though, I don’t know if any remnant of that ancient tradition even remains to this day,” the middle-aged orc-blooded woman concluded with a small academic sigh. “I’ve certainly not met any in my travels, or even heard about them from anywhere else than old ruins and forgotten tomes.”
“I see. Thank you for your time, seeker Morkgha.” Jaden bowed, and left with a mixed feeling of frustration in his stomach.
When he saw Kellen and the increasingly distressed Oleander again, it was in the early afternoon. The redhead ran to his side again, clutching his arm.
“Don’t let him take me to any more of those lectures, please! I take back anything bad I ever said about you stupid book-reading wizards. I don’t want to be an apprentice anymore, even a fake one!” She bared her teeth at Kellen. It wasn’t a smile, not really.
“Well, wasn’t all that interesting, little fox?” Kellen said magnanimously. “You’ve learned so much today, haven’t you?”
“Leave me alone, you monster!” She shot back. Oleander wasn’t much for the temptations of the ivory tower.
“Your loss. My colleagues here have invited me along for a little ‘shop talk’ after the last event now. Why don’t you, my dear apprentice, go sort your runes according to epoch?” The Northman’s comment earned a knowing nod and chuckle from the other rune seekers. It must be a common theme for many seekers in training.
Oleander stuck her tongue out once Kellen had turned his back and began to leave with his newfound friends. Jaden imagined it must be nice for the huge Northman to talk with people on his own level for a change. Jaden loved his friends, but he was smart enough to realise that none of them offered the kind of intellectual challenge Kellen no doubt sought.
“Are you hungry?” Jaden asked his remaining friend, who still had a hand around his wrist. When he looked down, she hurriedly let him go.
“Yeah, a bit. The snacks here were good, but I didn’t want to just camp out at a table and gobble them all up. People were starting to look at me like I was the weird one after my third trip to the tables.” Her breath smelled slightly of eggs and lemon.
“You are weird, Ollie.”
“Bite me, elfboy.”
“Ugh,” Jaden wanted to reach up and make sure his hat properly covered his ears again. He had let them out while pretending to be an elf earlier. “Hey, do you remember what we used to do in Etrana?”
“Want to head down to the harbour and watch the ships?” Oleander brightened like a star. Both she and Jaden had grown up far from the ocean, with ships only in stories. They had enjoyed several moments just watching the wind push those big boats out into the endless waves.
“We could get something to eat while we’re there.” They smiled at each other. Just like old times.
Those waves came crashing in from the same ocean they had seen so many, many miles to the south. It was humbling to realise how small they were in comparison to the deep blue. Several ships were docked, bearing flags from all over the world. Oleander pointed out an Olman vessel, probably hailing from Risan.
They had gotten a “worker’s lunch” from one of the taverns near the harbour. A piece of bread a little larger than a hand, stuffed with meat and greens. Oleander had even picked up a bottle of wine for them to share as they sat with their legs out over the pier, dangling above the water.
“Hey, do you want some fruit to go with that?” Oleander rummaged around in her satchel.
“Sure, I guess? What do you have?” Jaden took another bite out of his stuffed bread.
“This!” She shoved something up into his face. He recognised the shape of something he would rather forget all about. It made him remember a very bad day in his life.
“Get that out of my face, Ollie!” He tried to push her away.
“No, never!” She sounded triumphant now that she had found his weakness.
Jaden pushed her harder, and they fell over to the side, with her almost on top of him. Oleander met his eyes, and for a couple of heartbeats they were both silent, not knowing what to do. The rude whistling of a harbour worker caused the moment to pass, and Oleander slid away from him with a slight blush on her face. The workers grinned at the two young foreigners as they strolled past to their next job.
When Jaden sat back up, Oleander had taken a large bite out of her lunch and seemingly focused on that. He wasn’t sure what to feel about this. It felt strange. Did she like him, as in like-like him? Or was he just reading too much into an embarrassing situation? Also, when had he even bothered with thinking about these things?
"Isn't that the captain we saw yesterday?" Oleander pointed toward one of the large storage houses huddled together along the waterfront like weary old soldiers before their last battle.
"I think so, yeah," Jaden looked up from his half-finished piece of bread, and spotted the brightly clad Marsander seafarer urging his men to work quickly as they carried covered crates of widely different sizes to the waiting wagon. Strange that they hadn't anchored their ship closer to the storage, so they could bring the wares directly on board without having to use wagons.
"Aren't you curious what they're smuggling? Maybe it's Northern iron, since they're headed to
Marsantias?" The redhead speculated. The island nation didn't have large iron reserves of its own, and traded for many metals.
"What about drugs? Those merchants looked pretty shady back there," Jaden suggested, and threw a few pieces of bread to a crow that had hopped up on a nearby mooring pillar. It looked a little lonely, so he felt like feeding it for some reason.
"Eh, I don't know. That lot didn't look like Whitewater material to me. The Cartel takes umbrage with anyone trying to edge in on their business. Tier is not that far off, after all.”
"Either way, we should probably stay out of their way, Ollie." Jaden looked out over the waves crashing against the harbour side. The sea was a mystery to him, but he felt it was oddly calming as well. "The ocean breeze feels nice. We should do this more often."
"Yeah," Oleander peered up at him almost shyly and smiled. "We really should."
On a whim, Jaden opened his senses to the magical world, and looked out across the sea. The ocean wasn't magic in of itself, but it was as if he could see streams of light threading its way through the currents underneath the surface. Like rivers in the ocean. It was a subtle, but humbling display of the hidden pulse of the world.
A place where there is a river in the sky, came to his mind, but it hadn’t been his thought.
"Is that a cage they're carrying?" Oleander's voice sounded as if Jaden was underwater, a bit distorted and distant. The mundane world always took on a slightly unreal quality when he witnessed its magical reflection.
Jaden looked the way she was pointing again, back at the storage house. With his mystics' sight, he couldn't make out the details very well - it was all a grey blur. But the light of magic shone clearly within the cage, like a candle in the dark. Almost all the boxes the workers had stacked on the wagon held some sort of magic.
The magic inside the crates was moving. It was alive. The captain was transporting magical creatures.
"Ollie? Are you still curious about what's in those crates?" The Lacunai made pacts with willing creatures. He wasn’t sure what was going on here, however.
"Sure? Did you see something?" She peered at the place where the workers toiled away.
"Yeah. Let's sneak inside and take a closer look." Jaden tried not to listen to his instincts. They always caused him to end up in trouble.
"Alright! Now you're singing my song!"
The workers were too busy to pay much attention to other folks just walking past the storage buildings. The captain kept their eyes on the cargo, making them fail to notice how two of those people, out on an afternoon stroll, ducked back around a corner. They were too into stacking the boxes to see the same two use the cover of a couple of large waiting crates to sneak inside their building.
It was somewhat poorly lit inside. A single oil lamp hung from a nail on a support post provided some illumination, and the wide open doors allowed some daylight to reach inside. Further inside, however, and the large front portion of the storage became clad in shadows. Oleander picked her way through the passages lined with whatever crates and boxes the merchants kept here, her eyes on an opening into a rear section. When a small group of workers returned inside for their next load, Jaden touched her arm and they crouched down until the sound of the men struggling back toward the door told them it was safe to continue.
Stepping around the inner wall, they relaxed a little. It looked like the men were focusing on the cargo closest to the doors for now, which should give them some time to poke around. Jaden’s eyes adapted to the darkness almost immediately, and now it was his time to lead as Oleander was still mostly feeling her way around. There were more boxes here, but also covered cages of different sizes.
“Hang on, Ollie. I’m going to take a peek,” he said, trusting she would know what he meant.
With the fading mundane colours, the presences inside the cages became vivid beacons. Magic was present in a lot of these boxes, as well. Jaden turned around to take in all of the back area. He stopped when he saw the large tree. It had been roughly prepared for transport with its branches and roots hacked off. He couldn’t look away from the woman lying on top of the tree, her green skin shimmering to his mystics’ sight, her hands caressing the bark. She was whispering something over and over. The dryad looked sickly, with sunken eyes and cheeks, and paid them no notice.
“What was that?” Oleander looked at the covered cage next to them. There was another rustling from behind the burlap. When she squatted down and lifted the cloth, she barely kept from swearing out loud when a lizard-like head peered back at her.
It was a reddish-brown creature with a long snout, small horns and bright yellow eyes. Its wings had been slashed to prevent flight, should it ever leave the cage.
“That’s a kosh-dars, a dracone.” Jaden explained, kneeling down as well. He couldn’t help the wave of sympathy for this small creature, distantly related to the dragons his father walked among.
On hearing him saying the name in the dragons’ language, the dracone raised its head with something close to a hopeful gleam in its eyes. It hissed a few times, but managed with difficultly to form draconic words. Jaden began to translate for Oleander’s benefit.
“Speak Great Ones’ tongue?”
“I do, friend. A bit.” Jaden concentrated on remembering the inflections and syntax of the ancient language.
“Come free us?”
Jaden looked at Oleander as he translated the dracone’s words. The redhead started to look sad.
“We didn’t even know they were here…” She mumbled.
“We were unaware of your plight, friend.”
The small dragon lowered its head down on its front claws again. It looked tired.
“Help us?”
“We will try. How did you come here?”
“They came to Serecea. Traps. Brought us on long water, and rolling wood. Been here for days. Don’t know. No sun.” The dracone closed its eyes, trying to save its strength.
“Serecea?” Oleander blinked.
“It’s the elven word for Sorun,” Jaden explained.
“This isn’t right, Jay. This is slavery.” She bit her lip.
“It’s murder, Ollie. That dryad over there is dying. They cut her roots, and sawed off her branches.” He glanced again at the green woman. She hugged the mutilated trunk of the tree as if she could keep it alive with her love alone.
“We need to do something!”
"I know, but without the others here, I'm not sure what we can do." Jaden looked around the room. His almost-gold eyes could pick up the details all too clearly in the darkness.
"Let's bust open the cages," Oleander pulled out her favoured three-tooth medium pick from her sleeve.
"Most of these guys don't look like they can run, let alone walk. We need a plan to get them out. We need Mirena and Rhyce, at least. All of us, really."
Before Oleander could reply, the dryad craned her head back a bit and stared sightlessly toward the roof.
“I can smell violets… Are we back at the grove again? Are we home?” Her voice was frail, but even in this state it reminded Jaden of sunlit, green fields and dewdrops falling off leaves.
The sound of footsteps coming toward the rear section put an end to their whispering. There were no other way out than through the front door, so they hid behind the dracone’s cage, with Jaden apologising as they let the cover fall back over the bars.
"Alright. Bring the wood, too. They pay good for that." The foreman directed the men to the dryad’s tree.
As the workers started to push the tree toward the separation wall, the dryad began to sing in a low voice, a soothing lullaby to her oak. Jaden and Oleander took the opportunity of their distraction to sneak out into the front part of the storage building. As they were about to step outside into the fresh air of the harbour, someone shouted from within.
"Hey, you! You are not allowed in here!" The foreman pointed at them, and began to walk their way with quick steps.
Oleander didn’t bother to wait for another reason, and broke into a run, grabbing Jaden by the hand and dragged him along. The man shouted at other workers to follow as he began to chase them. She ducked in between the buildings, dashing through the alleys that just about allowed a grown person. Oleander, having grown up on the streets, knew how to run and hide. Two quick turns on the back passages that made out the narrow spaces between the storage houses, and she found an unlocked door. Without checking first, they ducked through and hid as best as they could. The shelves and dirty shovels told them it was some sort of backdoor tool-locker.
"You realise we probably could've taken those workers, right? We've fought Kynians, for goodness sake!" Oleander slapped him on the arm, as if she hadn’t been the one to make a run for it to begin with.
"And a demon," Jaden reminded her.
"That too!"
"I doubt the city guard would be happy with us if we murdered a bunch of dockhands, though." The black-haired mystic pondered out loud.
"I didn't mean we should kill them, just knock them out!"
"There were like six of them, Ollie."
"So?" She didn’t seem to see the problem.
"That's not knock-out odds!" Jaden held up a few fingers to show the difference, but found himself one short. Fortunately, it was probably too dark for her to see it anyway.
"Well, what about your magic?" Oleander made some sounds she imagined represented magic in all its forms, and wiggled her fingers.
"All this is made out of wood. Burning down the entire harbour wouldn't make the guards any happier than the aforementioned bloody rampage."
"You've got that other thing, though, right?" She said, listening at the door.
"What... other thing?" Jaden stiffened in the poorly lit room. She couldn’t possibly know about… his condition, right?
"You know, that not-a-fish spell?"
"... what? Not a fi- oh, Noctophyx?" Jaden paused for a second. "It's really good against single opponents, but the effect is spread out if there's more than one. Against six, it would make it an even fight, but hardly guarantee us walking away."
"I hate even fights!" Dirty was the only way Oleander knew to do combat.
They heard people walking past the other side of the door, and then how one of them stopped and tried the handle.
Jaden didn't have time to think it through. He immediately changed the flow of magic through his veil. The illusion swelled as much as possible, growing a coarse beard and rolled-up sleeves. In the blink of an eye, he was the image of a harbour worker. As the door swung open and daylight rushed into the small side room, Jaden leaned forward and planted a big kiss on Oleander's lips. The double surprise reflected in her huge eyes.
"I found some- uh.." The heavyset man holding the door blinked a little.
"Hey, can't you see I'm busy?" Jaden shot back with the gruffest voice he could manage.
"Uh. Sorry." The man made as if to close the door on the couple, who were clearly having a private moment, when he turned back. "Did you see some young ones hustle through here?"
"I saw two elves hightailing it like dogs were on their scent," Jaden tried his best Albander accent. "Went upcoast. Now get out!"
"Sorry!" The man shut the door gingerly, and then shouted at his friends. "They went that way!"
Jaden and Oleander held their breaths and waited a couple of frantic heartbeats before talking at once.
"Ollie, I'm so sor-"
"Rotting ravens, Jay, wha-" Oleander began. They both trailed off at the same time. "You first."
"I didn't mean to do that, but it was the only thing I could think of," Jaden tried to explain.
"That's okay. I didn't mind." Her chest hurt a little. He hadn't wanted to kiss her. With an effort she swallowed her roiling thoughts for later, and waved at his different form. "But what's with this?"
"Oh. It's an illusion," The mystic explained.
"How long have you been able to do that?" Oleander hadn’t seen Jaden do anything like that before.
"Uh..." Time to lie! "Since picking up a magic scarf from the demon in Redwall. She used it to hide her true appearance."
"Oh. That makes sense. Why didn't you tell us about it?" She frowned a little. It was bad manners to keep loot to yourself. Well, unless it was her doing it, but that was different.
"I didn't know if it still worked. You girls did a number on her!"
"Heh. Yeah, we did," Oleander opened the door a crack and peered outside. "I think it's safe now."
"Okay. You head back and get the others," Jaden said. "I'll use my disguise to see if I can do something for those poor creatures in there."
"No, Jay! Not a chance! You're not ditching me again!" She stabbed him in the chest with a finger. It sunk into the yielding softness. "Woah, that thing is realistic."
"Uh. Yeah." Jaden's illusion of an overweight worker hid the true shape underneath, but the redhead's poke was painful to his sensitive chest. He fought the urge to rub it. "But you can't stay here. One of them was bound to have seen your carrot hair. There's not that many Olman girls up here."
"But..." She knew he was right. They had just been lucky when that man had pulled the door open. The next person who saw them might recognise her from earlier. She gave Jaden a harsh glare anyway. “Fine. I’ll go, but you had better stay out of trouble, you hear me?”
“I’ll try, Ollie.” No promises. That way he wouldn’t have to lie more than he already did.
“You’re not getting a good-luck kiss looking like that, though,” She suddenly flashed him a grin.
“What?” Jaden blinked.
Before he could say anything else, she slipped out of the door with a quick look to see if the coast was still clear. With that, she set off at a dead run back toward the craftsmen’s district.
With Oleander safely away, Jaden started back toward the storage house. At least, he thought he was going the right way. He hadn't paid as much attention as he should have when they were running, but instead focused on not tripping over things while following the redhead. He had to get used to how his body moved now, or he'd probably fall over in the worst situation possible.
A couple of other workers, not seeming like they were actively looking for someone, walked past him with barely a second glance. They carried some covered buckets, and Jaden decided he wasn't curious enough to think about what they were up to. His illusion allowed him to blend in like a chameleon, and that was enough for now.
Certain that he had been turned around at some point, Jaden took a moment to peek into the magical world once more. As the world became grey and faded, he immediately spotted threads converging on a building not too far off. It looked more or less ambient, like how a place tended to be stained by magic if exposed repeatedly over a long time. He wouldn't be sure until he got a closer look, so he approached as casually as he could, reminding himself to copy the trundling gait of the workers. It caused Jaden to stumble a little before he caught himself against a nearby wall. He had to stop for a moment and fight the sudden anger that surged up from within. Nothing was working the way it used to. He was clumsy, and everything was wrong. It was all that spirit’s fault!
A minute passed as he got his breathing under control again. The rage had passed quickly, as suddenly as it had appeared. It left a strange feeling in its wake, partially cleansed but also an echo of acceptance from the other side of his heart. As if something told him it was okay to feel. It was enough to allow him to return to his search.
As Jaden walked around the building looking for the entrance, he realised that this was different storage house than the one they had been inside earlier. Still, with the magic he had seen, there must be something going on in there.
A peek around the corner showed the large double doors, wide enough to allow a wagon inside. The doors were shut, though, and a figure was standing outside, clearly guarding it. The man guarding the door wore a hooded cloak, even during the summer day. Jaden squinted a little against the sun, and barely managed to hold back a surprised gasp. He saw the discolorations on the man's face and hands; the man showed signs of a mystic’s drift.
What was a Lacunai doing here? Was he a part of the delegation from Talraman? Or, was he a rogue mystic like Jaden? He couldn’t think of a good answer to those questions, but one fact remained: that mystic was guarding this building, and that meant that whatever was inside, was very important. Jaden looked around a little more, and saw a ladder propped against the other house just a little bit back the way he had come. His eyes went up toward the roof of the suspicious building, and a plan formed in his mind. Not a good plan, but a plan nevertheless.
Carefully, as quiet as he could, Jaden moved the ladder over and climbed up as far as it allowed. It wasn’t a tall ladder, but he could easily reach the roof from the top rung. He would have to pull himself up the last bit, though. It was a little tougher than he remembered, and there was an unexpected pain when his chest squished against the hard rooftop.
“Stupid breasts,” Jaden hissed as he rolled over on his back after finally managing to clamber the last bit. It had actually hurt.
The roof was not in the best of conditions, with cracks that allowed him to look inside. It was as poorly lit as the other buildings, but that was no problem for Jaden’s eyes. He could make out at least three people standing in an open space amid packaged goods. While not sure, two of them looked like the merchants Oleander and he had heard threatening the Marsander captain. The third man was clearly a little older with grey hair, but unusually tall. About Stann’s height, Jaden guessed, but only half his weight. Without hearing the conversation, he could only imagine what was going on down there. Not for the first time, Jaden wished he had Rhyce’s keen hearing.
Jaden tried crawling a little further up the roof to be able to get a better look at the third man, when a splintering noise underneath him caused a cold pit in his stomach. With a crack and a snap, the roof below his body broke apart and sent him plummeting into the dark storage building.
Jaden barely had time to scream before the impact on a crate drove the air from his lungs. He had managed to twist around during the fall, and landed on his back. The crash broke the wood apart, and sent out a cloud of spices in the room. Not able to draw breath at the moment, Jaden could instead hear the coughing of the men who got caught in the dust.
“What manner of treachery is this?” An angry Albander voice called out.
“I knew we couldn’t trust him, the Olman scum! Look, he brought elven assassins to our meeting!” A second voice. Jaden vaguely recognised the merchants from yesterday.
Wait, elf? Jaden’s eyes caught on a shred of creamy silk swaying in the ocean breeze as it found the hole in the roof. It had ripped on a sharp piece of broken wood. Her hand went to her head. Her veil!
“Now, look here,” a third voice called out. It sounded dry from coughing.
“No, you look! You might have your spellguard bitch, but we have something better!” The first merchant let out a shrill whistle. “Taseno! Leave no bodies!”
Jaden pushed herself to her feet. It was a little easier to move when she could see her arms and legs. The illusion always made things slightly too far away, or too close. Taseno, a mystic? She knew the family name. Not as old as the Tarasovs, but they had their share of powerful magicians over the years.
The doors tore open and the cloaked man walked inside. His form began to waver and expand, at the same time as liquid darkness poured forth from inside the cloak.
“You said this would be a private meeting, and you had a mystic beast lurk at your beck and call? You will regret double-crossing me, Hamos!” The Olman man cursed at the two merchants with his dry voice.
Jaden suddenly realised who the approaching mystic was. Nerak Taseno, bound to the Drowning Dark. If she revealed herself to be a mystic as well, Nerak would likely try to kill her anyway, to hide the fact that he was working outside the mountain. With Nerak’s spirit being what it was, Jaden realised that this was not a fight she could win. Both she and the Olman man would die, and disappear into the void. Only choice left was to run.
The grey-haired man seemed to have reached the same conclusions as Jaden, and backed away from the now ten foot tall monster of twisting gloom. They began to run in the same direction, away from the approaching darkness and the merchants’ cruel jeers. Their footsteps made a hollow noise as they ran across the floorboards.
“There’s a floor below!” The man called out.
“Won’t that trap us?” Jaden gasped back.
“Smuggler’s place. Old tunnels honeycomb the foundations of this city.”
“Got it!” Jaden checked to see if Nerak was following them. He was. “Back up a bit. Valignat!”
A concentrated blue-hot flame shot out from Jaden’s fist and seared a hole in the floor. Salamander fire burned hotter than most, and made quick work of the wood.
The man gave her a re-evaluating glance, but jumped down into the smouldering hole without missing a beat. The Drowning Dark was almost upon them, and there was no time to second guess their desperate plan.
Jaden landed heavily on the stone floor. Her legs hurt from the fall earlier, and even more so now, but she pushed it aside. It was time to man up. True to the Olman’s words, though, there was a sewer-like tunnel leading off into the dark, connected to this hidden cellar. They immediately pushed on. If it was such a maze down here, it was their best chance to lose their pursuers.
They ran for what felt like forever, but in reality probably only a few minutes. Jaden had to stop, since her left leg hurt too much to go on at this speed. There was a good chance she had sprained something. The man, not old, but definitely middle-aged, was breathing heavily as well. He apparently didn’t do a lot of running in his line of work. As their breaths settled, they listened intently down the tunnel they had come, but heard only drip-drops of water, and the faint whistling of a breeze.
“An interesting day,” the man concluded, once he felt like he could talk again. “I should have known better than to deal with Albander foxes.”
“I’m so sorry for, uh, dropping in on you like that,” Jaden knew the man was likely a criminal as well, but right now they had only each other to get out of this mess.
“If they already had a beast like that, they no doubt planned to use it. You just sped up their betrayal.” He straightened up, almost reaching the top of the tunnel with his sweat-matted hair. “Are you truly a spellguard? That might become useful.”
“Ral Sona company,” she easily lied. “Those two made threatening accusations against my employer.”
“Being more careful in choosing our partners is clearly the lesson of the day,” he said with that dry voice of his. It sounded familiar, now that she thought about it.
Jaden swallowed dryly. Now that she had the chance to look at him closely, she realised who the grey-haired man was. She hadn’t recognised him without his ceremonial robes, and the purple bubble.
“Shall we continue?” He asked, and motioned toward one of the tunnels splitting off from the main one.
The sky above the farm was overcast, but some sunlight trickled through in places. The black speck grew larger as it came closer, and circled the farm once before settling on one of the lower branches on the chestnut tree behind the farmhouse. In the shade under the leaves of the tree were two gravestones, a little worn by the weather, but with the names as clear as the day they were chiselled.
The crow jumped down from the branch onto one of the stones, and a ray of light sent a glimmer off the small silver necklace it carried in its beak. With a flap of its wings, it landed in front of the stone and put the necklace down on the ground. It dug through the fallen leaves from last year, showing a few other glittering pieces hidden by the seasons. Satisfied with the placement of the latest gift, it fluttered its wings once more, and let out a mournful call.
Comments
Story continues
to take many turns... When will Jaden finally stand up to her family, stand up to the sprite that has bonded to her and when will she be honest with herself? These are the questions and I think one of her friends will actually provide either a solution or an answer to one or all of those questions. Stay tuned as Melange takes us on that great journey.
SDom111
Men should be Men and the rest should be as feminine as they can be
It's one of those stories
That's very sweet of you to say, Dom!
Clearly, this reader has been peering into the crystal ball again! But, who knows what will happen in the next chapter?
... well, I know, but I'm not telling! (Until next week, that is :) )
Oh Wow!
I loved the bit with the necklace. However the business with the Lacuni buying mystical creatures have a sinister feel. It also suggests that is why the Warmaster is truly there. The question is he there investigating or there approving the purchase?
And Jaden gets her first real clue that there is magic that can help. However first she has to free the dragons and help that poor dryad. Then she can go hunt down those elves. Hmmm... I wonder if the Elven delegation would help free those enslaved? There were trapped on elven lands.
Just great stuff!
hugs
Grover
Glee!
There's certainly something rotten in the state of De- uh... Alband!
Can you feel those plots? Can you FEEL them? All the plots! :D
Poor Dryad is right
God it made me so sad, it reminds me of all the raping and pillaging mankind has done to our poor wildlife.
I am happy/sad that I do not have children, consequently. Everybody who has children always claim that it would be their little one who will be the next Einsteain or something, trying to justify having that one extra child. Good luck with that!
Less is more I say.
Kim
Themes
That scene was a little hard for me to write. So far I've covered light-hearted comedy (even some slapstick), a little action, adventure, and mystery. It's probably a good experience, though, to delve into some of the darker aspects of our history. Maybe in this world, we can do something different? :)
Within reason of course
There are some themes by common consent are there but are taboo or is so obvious that it serves no purpose to go into, eg incest, pedophilia etc. Those in my opinion should only be touched on in tangent and only for solid need in the story for it to be there. I have objected, and was censored for it, to incestuous behavior of the main protagonist of a story posted here where in my opinion really only served a very secondary background to the person which to me needlessly fouled up the story.
There are enough horrors and less than charitable parts of the human experience that is present without including too much of the extremes needlessly.
Kim
Oh, of course!
I didn't mean to dive into absolute misery and abject horror, Kimmieburger! I was thinking more along the lines of, "to appreciate the peaks, we have to be aware of the chasms". My story has, on the whole, been fairly positive. Sure, there's been pain, loss, death - but there's also been an abundance of friendship, love, and hope. I just wanted to make sure it's a balanced story, that recognised and acknowledges that there is, in fact, a lot of darkness in the world.
Just that, nothing more :)
I loved the new start to the next adventure.
I'm right back there to AD&D and adventuring in Waterdeep with the city adventure vibe to it.
So happy I took the time to get caught up:)
*Great Big Hugs*
Bailey Summers
Roll for initiative!
Cities offer so much in ways of interesting story locations. Markets, towers, bridges, harbours, taverns, and so on - they each provide a nice backdrop for a romantic scene or the random panicked flight from a horrible abomination bent on total consumption. You know, the usual :)
Mistaken Identity?
Wonderful story telling as always Melange. Neither the meeting with Jaden's sister nor the beginning of another adventure disappoint. Even if she did not intend it, she's broken cover and showed her now true form. It seems that the revelation to the group will be sooner rather than later. Maybe. In a land where magic is real the most obvious to us may not be what ends up happening. I look forward to your next chapter. Well done!
Exploring the impossibilities,
Jo Dora Webster on YouTube
Doom?
Thanks Jo! :)
It's all those Nymphs fault, though. If they only wove their ratty silk kerchiefs a little sturdier, we wouldn't be in this situation! What IS the world coming to?
More specifically
... they are probably those Chinese Nymphs, outsourcing, tsk tsk ;)
Kim
Cheap knockoffs
That made me think. What country or culture in the world this story is taking place in, would have the reputation of making cheap or low-quality products meant to undercut a current market? Probably none, in the traditional sense, since this world is magic-reliant, and pre-industrial. I can't imagine mass production is any significant scale.
Though, the idea of the dwarves of Atun keeping a sweatshop of slave-goblins to churn out cheap "genuine dwarven jewellery", is more amusing that it should be :)
Oh I don't know
Why can't there be a concept of a spell that takes a lot of shortcuts (eg little power) to produce low quality spells to cheat the non-magical folks and such. That is already what seems to be implied. Maybe like the suppliers could be the Jawas of magic, to thoroughly confuse metaphors?
So how would cheap spells look in the magical sight, incoherent and insubstantial threads?
Oh and for mass production, maybe there is a magic barrel that one just throws ordinary stuff in to 'infuse' it with magical qualities in bulk. Not exactly ritual grade magical manufacturing, but...
Kim
Jawa spellsmiths!
First off: Utinni!
With that out of the way, I can totally imagine there being less scrupulous magicians who do take shortcuts with inferior materials and haphazard rituals to make a bigger profit out of their products - I just couldn't see if there would be a culture that people was automatically a little prejudiced against (Chinese knockoffs, Made in Taiwan, Danish umbrellas, things like that). I don't want to put it on the Olmans again. They have hard enough time as it is.
A cheap spell - some sort of enchantment the magician didn't bother doing right - would probably look frazzled and would unravel quicker than a properly cast one. All active magic requires some sort of maintenance from a magician, unless it has changed the very properties of an object (or creature). For instance, a magic sword would remain 'enchanted', but a magic lantern would eventually burn out.
I like your idea of a magic forge where you could just drop a heap of junk, and pull out some iffy-looking horseshoes ("Hamos? They're all backwards!"). I might even borrow that :P
Hmm...
Well, one way or another, you are gradually building up to the point where Jaden will have to reveal his/her changes to his/her friends. However, at the moment, it looks like that (emotional) arc is going to complete before the overt physical arcs do. What's your plan going forward? (Note: I'm not expecting you to answer that directly in the commentary, I'm simply asking it as a technical note.) Once you've brought that out into the open you'll have relieved a lot of the dynamic tension propelling the story. You've got other emotional elements in play, is one of them going to take over? Will the other emotional elements in play be strong enough to take over as a main driving arc?
Hm... Lilya is a Basilisk eh? That's certainly in keeping with the family's draconic tendencies. Also ... in keeping with my earlier "Stone" metaphor ;) Lilya's conversation with Jaden was pretty much what I had expected, but to be honest, I was a bit surprised at the level of sympathy she showed. I was actually expecting the moral indignation and outrage quotient to be a little higher from her.
Jaden's mother is still alive? Why did I have the impression she was deceased? Was I just completely wrong about that? That would certainly add an interesting emotional dynamic to the whole family interaction if she is still alive.
I appreciate the clarification as to who the two people Rhyce buried were, but the fact that he still buys his wife gifts is ... a bit morbid. Rhyce needs to learn to move on. Honoring the past is good, but living in it ... not so good.
I hope we're going to see more of Mirena's relationships with her family, that looks like a rich emotional vein to tap, though at this point it seems a bit more tangential to the main plot.
Obviously, one of the biggest post-reveal questions is going to be how Stann and Ollie will handle Jaden's changes.
On that subject, I'm going to have to give you the skeptical-eyebrow-raise with regard to the physical action that took place between Ollie and Jaden during this installment. Ollie actually notices how similar the voices of Jaden and "his" sister are. Ollie lands on top of Jaden, in an extremely intimate fashion during their impromptu picnic. Then they actually hug-and-kiss to distract the people pursuing them, and finally, she actually pokes Jaden in the breast after "he" admits to using an illusion to mask his features. I get that despite her street-wise ways Ollie is still supposed to be pretty young and naive with regard to male-female interactions, but my credulity is being strained by how oblivious she seems to be that Jaden has a female shape underneath "his" illusion. Now, some women aren't quite so ... obvious (physically) ... and you might not notice their breasts when you hug them, but ... you've made it clear that Jaden is pretty well endowed. I'm finding it increasingly hard to believe that Ollie (still) isn't putting two-and-two together.
The overt, physical action continues to be episodic in nature, but it does look like you're working to tie those threads into a larger whole as well which is good. An episodic story is fine up to a point, but I think it does need to come together eventually. The reappearance of the Sons of the Husk patriarch is good.
Has Jaden finally lost "his" illusion generating scarf? That would certainly force the issue the next time he encounters his friends. I have to wonder if you're teasing us though, perhaps "he'll" be able to repair it. Regardless of whether or not he can repair it, I suspect we may see an installment or two where he's "under cover" interacting more directly with the Sons of the Husk patriarch. Hmm....
I'm also a bit curious as to how he's going to resolve the whole family issue thing without breaking off completely into his own sub-story. A lot of my interest in the story is how he interacts with his friends, yet the family issues he discusses with his sister seem to be something he'll need to work out without them (his friends). Is there a way to bring his friends into that portion of the plot?
Anyway, them's the ideas off the top of my head ... enjoyable installment, looking forward to the next one.
Illusions and connections
Congratulations on pegging Lilya's spirit! :)
Oleander is the youngest one of the group, by a couple of years, but having grown up on the streets she is probably the least naive of the bunch (aside from Rhyce). Illusions can be a funny thing, though. If we have no reason to suspect anything, we often just buy into whatever our eyes tells us, even if some of our other senses tell us otherwise. Oleander and Jaden have also known each other for over a year as well, so I don't feel that she is constantly re-evaluating what kind of person Jaden is. Luckily for Jaden, Oleander poked an illusion of an overweight dockworker, and the soft flesh underneath more or less matched her expectations. She doesn't really know the limitations of illusions anyway.
But! I appreciate you pointing out a potential plot-(or character)-hole! If I ever end up rewriting earlier chapters, I might come back and make more of a point of how Jaden tries to avoid physical contact or why people seem to not notice anything :)
About the action? Don't worry. I've got a crazy feeling things might be connected somehow!
To answer your most pertinent question, however: My plan for going forward? Why, it's cake. Always cake.
I don't think...
I don't think you need to go back and make it any more obvious that Jaden is increasingly reticent about touching other people. I think you've already done a good job pointing that out, and in also showing the covert reactions from people as they either figure it out (in Rhyce's case) or misinterpret it (in Stann's case).
Ollie's reactions and obliviousness tend to stand out in contrast specifically because everyone else (just about) seems to have noticed that something funny is going on (though not necessarily what the specifics are or the motivations behind those specifics). You're right of course that people tend to use mental shorthand for the visual appearance of people they know, but .... Ollie is supposed to be a street-wise thief, she should have a high base "notice-check" roll.
It's certainly not completely outside the realm of possibility that Ollie would still be oblivious, I'm just pointing out that I'm skating pretty close to my personal credulity limit on the subject. Ollie's pretty interested in Jaden, and has had chances for some fairly tactile interactions. It looks to me like she should start figuring it out soon. Does she notice that other Lacunai Mystics tend to develop "marks" that give them a non-human (or at least "different than their original") appearance?
Ollie
I'm sure that Ollie did notice some discrepancy on Jaden part but did not put two and two together and come to ten yet. That will probably come when she'll thought that Lilya was in the bath a few days back.
I guest you can say that Jaden mother went missing possibly in the mission in the flashback.
You got to wonder is there any lasting effects form the crystal skull.
Avidly waiting to next week.
Peace and Love
tmf
The power of love is a
The power of love is a curious thing. Make one girl peek, make another girl blind. Change a thief to an inattentive woman. More than a feeling...
Lilya did mention that their mother was angry with Jaden for running away, so if she was missing, she has had time to get back :)
What? Any lingering effects from rubbing your hands all over an Obsidian Skull Death Idol? (That name alone!) Preposterous!
the encounter with her sister went better than I hoped
but her current situation is pretty scary ....
Siblings who play dragon-eats-you together, stay together
Maybe it's not as scary as the author is misleading us to think?
Maybe this was all an elaborate ruse to lead Jaden back to a surprise birthday party? With cake and dwarven firemen strippers?
dwarven fireman strippers?
gee, thanks. I'm NEVER gonna get that image out of my head now ....
Enjoy!
Those hairy chests, the thick thighs. The truly bulbous noses! Drink it in, Dorothy! :)
Did someone say Dwarven Strippers? = )
Are they pot-bellied to the point that they have to lift their tummies to expose themselves, or are they slimline? : )
Interesting chapter here.
Jaden and Ollie discovered people trading in magical creatures, Jaden lost his/her -- more her these days -- scarf or veil to hold illusions, and now she is with the leader of the bad guys they first ran into in the story. Sheesh.
I don't think Oleander is unobservant regarding Jaden as much as she is very interested in him on a girl to guy basis and is probably ignoring things that would have her alarm bells ringing with her about anyone else. She wants to ignore things that don't jibe with her own picture of Jaden from when they first met.
Family issues are important here with Jaden, and how to handle how his friends will deal with his 'new' look. But first she has to deal with being so close to the Sons of Husk. That was a surprise, by the way.
My thoughts are that the tension won't go once she actually reveals herself to her friends, though the hiding things will be done. But regaining their trust because he hid his problem so long, so the tension will continue, just in a different direction.
Very nice chapter here.
Maggie
Bells and blinds
I believe we've all turned a blind eye to some strange actions or flaws in people we care deeply about. We only see what we want to see, after all.
Also, boom! Surprise! It was a little hard for me to keep my mouth shut when some comments pointed out how short and arbitrary the Sons of Husk arc felt :D
Thanks for reading, and here's hoping some things will come to light next chapter!
You had that actually
You had that actually planned? So no Solo quest for fucks sake? :) Because it really read that way...
Olli seems a bit willfully oblivious. Makes me wonder if that's thanks to a certain obsidan death skull curse and the fact that Jaden absorbed the magic. Maybe she doesn't reallize because the curse is still working and influencing her and Jaden doesn't want her to realize?
Anyway, I like how you've made Jaden an unreliable narrator. It seemed like his sister was being an ass, in reality it seems he just ran away from home, stole her inheritance and just wasted it for this stupid illusion scarf. If I was her I would be pissed too. The guy really really overreacted, didn't he? His mother seems like a person who'd probably kicked his father's ass for even sugesting to use her son as an information whore. His sister didn't exactly seem fond of the idea either. Although she didn't seem to have an idea. Dear daddy probably didn't part with the reason why Jaden ran away. It certainly wasn't his transformation in itself as he seems quite aware that the best way to cure it would have been at their castle.
Fucked up family dynamics, I guess.
Thank you for writing this captivating story, I can't wait for the next chapter,
Beyogi
Plotty-plot-plot!
In the words of Rhyce "No one point of view can embrace reality at a glance". That's one of the reasons I like to shift perspectives in the story - Jaden sees the world in a specific way, and has feelings that colours that point of view. As does everyone else. Only by looking through several sets of eyes do we approach the truth :)
I have actually planned recurring arcs into a third book, for many figures already seen - and some we have not yet met. To me, it shows a more living world if the paths of its people coincide every so often. Also, there might be plots. Epic plots, even? Mmm? Perhaps?
So there, Beyogi! :P
Wow... you showed me
Wow... you showed me :D
Seriously though, I've something new to be worried about. I really hope there will be character development for Jaden as he seems to grow progressively immature - at least in the eyes of the reader - as we learn more about his backstory.
I really hope he doesn't end up somewhat like Ranma or certain Urban Fantasy heroines, where status quo is god and who're utterly incapable of learning out of their mistakes. I mean the reader/viewer sees the pattern at the wall, but the protagonists stumbles from one trap to he next. I doubt that's something you've planned, but I guess it can be all too alluring to an author to keep the faults of their characters.
Jaden has kind of reached the point where he himself should be able to see that hiding isn't worth it. I really hope that kind of thing is a one time event and won't repeat. It's reaching the point where I just want to scream at him. I just hope he'll "fess up".
Can't wait for my epic plots :)
Thank you for writing,
Beyogi
Plots? Plots!
All in the eyes of the beholder, I suppose :) Please keep in mind that we've only known Jaden for about two weeks at this point. It's not been that long from their ill-fated adventure in Tier that started off this chain of events. That's some pretty big changes for a person to get used to, even if they were aware of the possibilities (or, inevitability) beforehand.
We're all creatures of path-of-least-resistance. As long as hiding was an option, Jaden felt compelled to continue to do so to be able to keep everything the way it was (a form of status quo, I suppose?), even in the face of what was happening. Now, however, she finds herself unveiled and in some pretty dangerous circumstances, with a certain person she probably would have wanted to avoid bumping into again :)
Can you smell the plots? Can you smell them?
It's sadly starting to look
It's sadly starting to look like Jaden has, as Giles once said of Wesley on BTVS, "the emotional maturity of a blueberry scone." She ran away from home over an argument, she traded a priceless family heirloom for a scarf (which she's now lost) to facilitate her ever growing tendency to lie, she's building walls and mistrust with the people most likely to accept her, and, despite seeming to have acknowledged her changes at the end of the first book, we're back to denial not just being a river in Egypt. Lots of adventure potential, soon, and magical creatures to rescue and rehabilitate, but storming the castles seems like the easy part to fix, at this point. Write faster! :)
Scones grow up into pie
One of my favourite things with this story is the foibles of the main characters. Jaden lies, hides, is vain and immature, runs away from responsibility. The protagonist of Horizons of the Heart is not a very impressive person, and certainly does not fit the description of an epic hero. And that's okay! That's fun for me. Our positive qualities may elevate us, but our flaws makes us human :)
The first book was, as you said, more about Jaden lying to him or herself. What IS the value of truth, if we're not truthful with ourselves? Still, up until now, Jaden has always had a safety net to fall back on, and has been able to keep lying to everyone (including Jaden). I wonder what will happen now when that's been taken out of the picture? :)
Read more about it next week!
Okay ... BIG can of worms opened here
What are all these magical creatures intended for? And from the way they are being handled the smugglers/traffickers either don't know how to care for them or simply don't care.
Lost magic scarf? It's woman-up time Jaden.
As to Olie.
Does she have desires for Jaden the male or the true Jaden, Jaden the female, that her confused senses are telling her lies beneath the illusion?
Stann? What mess will he and Olie...no that's those long dead comedians... What trouble will Stann fall into?
The crow, Rhyce and the necklace was very touching and odd.
I seems to me the wife was killed by magic or the crows were her's and the child's familiars? Remember Rhyce has some magical ability. What is there to say his late wife and child did not?
They are way too intelligent even for a smart bird such as a crow. It is as if a portion of the wife and child live on in the birds.
Were they cursed and their minds/spirits forced into the birds and then their human bodies died? A magic spell to farsee though the crows gone horridly wrong?
I know many birds are attracted to shinny things but why bury them at the wife's grave?
Could that be why he went rogue? He knew they were trapped in animal forms, probably without any hope of release or even entering heaven thus he snapped?
The sister of Jaden? Her link is changing her but something of his sweet though OLDER and competitive sister remains.
From the flashback I get the impressions, as others here noted, the mom was different after her mission. IE to Jaden she died that day she left.
Still think dear old dragon-y dad needs a dope slap. He is self righteous to the point of arrogance. Hope the magical being poachers are in some way tied to him or to his arrogance and foolishness.
And Jaden needs to accept who she has become. His sister suspects, at least knows something is not right with Jaden. Her master sees straight though the deceptions I suspect. And possibly even approves of who Jaden is now, except for the subterfuge.
I also noticed her inner spirit, the link to her bond, is trying to help her accept her emotions and her body. Still wonder why she chose HIM to bond with.
I suspect much of why she thinks her body is clumsy is not just operator error, IE she is not used to it quite yet. But more of HE is trying to fight it. Jaden is trying deliberately to *drive* her body like it is still male and that does not work.
LOVED it that the sister implied there IS substantial Elvin blood in their family line.
One thing I have noticed. Despite Jaden's many flaws when push comes to shove she bites the bullet and does what she must to save them.
What trouble will our rune master and our Paladin get into?
BTW PLEASE tell me she does NOT look like a female Richard Boone.
-- obscure reference to old radio/B&W TV Western --
John in Wauwatosa
John in Wauwatosa
Actually Jaden's sister sees right through the illusion
... so she knows exactly what is happening at this point; Basilisk power.
Richard who? ;)
Kim
Basilisk powah!
That's right. You can't hide from sister dearest. She sees you.
All the worms!
... wait, what? I goggled Richard Boone, and he's some sort of Western actor? I'm not even sure what character you compared with this Boone bloke, but I can assure you that neither Jaden, nor Mirena, has a moustache and a pistol :)
In fact, an image that helped me shape the character Mirena can be found at this blog right here. As for Jaden, I imagine that this is a pretty close representation? (Both pictures shows dressed people, so don't worry :) )
Rhyce is ever full of mystery. Maybe the future will reveal more, or maybe he's said all he plans to for now? Who knows?
I had a bit of a giggle too when I had Lilya contradict her brother about the lack of elven blood in their family tree :P
Kellen and Mirena? They've got their own parts to play, for sure. Hopefully that does not include climbing around on tall, shifty-looking roofs. Mostly because Mirena can't climb in her armour, and Kellen will pull down a building before willingly getting to any height. Poor guy :)
I liked the possible Jaden image
but the metal bra on Mirena...
KINKY!
Oh, that was suit of armor?
Very lovely model BTW.
Though isn't much of hers a spiritual armor as a full coat of armor is unwieldy except as a shock troop on horseback?
John in Wauwatosa
John in Wauwatosa
Full Metal Smite-alist
No, Mirena is actually wearing a full plate mail armour whenever she has the chance to prepare before battle, with a closed helmet (with visor) and shield to boot. She doesn't believe in the concept of Female Fantasy Armour.
When not smiting evil, she enjoys wearing nice gowns, though. She probably has a lighter chain mail armour for when a full tin can is not practical. The fact that she can run around in her heavy armour just shows how much of a badass she is :)
That was WOW!
I don't get how I only just now discovered this story. Or maybe I don't. This way I had a nice long read. Just a little too long perhaps. I started reading it somewhat late in the evening yesterday and didn't finish it until nearly 8 AM in the morning. I just couldn't story reading. It was THAT great.
No. Make that amazing. Nah, not good enough. This story is AWESOME!!!
I love the way you write it. With the great backgrounds of all the main characters. The friendly banter in the group. The fun to read, but sometimes completely useless lectures we get from Kellen. The character quirks, like Stann's obsession with Elven barmaids or Ollie's cooking. Small scenes that might not advance the plot but do add to the atmosphere of the story and some extra depth to the characters. And I suspect that most of these small scenes will even play a bigger part in the overall plot of the story. The great way you write. Your writing style. Your way with words. Oh, and did I mention that I love the way you write? If feels like you put some thought into every single word you wrote, while it all still feel very very natural. If there is any more of you to read anywhere on the internet, please tell me where and I'll go read it.
As for the story plot and the characters. I have little to really add. Just that I'm rooting for a relationship between Ollie and Jay. I think they make a really cute couple. Jay is a little clueless and Ollie isn't quite sure how to be anything but a tomboy about it. But I like that. And of course, I'm always rooting for the lesbian couples. That's just who I am. It's also why I really hope that they can both get over the fact that they're both girls, even if I have a hunch that Ollie won't have any problem with that. Jay might though. Anyway, fingers crossed for them.
Now, did I mention that this story is AWESOME? And that you, Melange, are an AWESOME writer? If not, I'll say it again right here. Melange, you are an AWESOME writer of an AWESOME story. There.
Another thing is, I also really enjoy world building. I'm just no good at writing and I think the plots and characters I come up with always seem a little, hmmm, shallow? I guess shallow it the right word. It's what I really admire about your story. Awesome characters, awesome world building, awesome plot and awesome use of and play with words.
P.S. One small thing I noticed is that even though many of the characters are around 30 years old or so, we haven't had the occasion where any of them has run into anyone they know from before the story started. Except for Jaden of course when she ran into her sister. Is there a reason for that or is that just the way things happened?
P.P.S. Fingers crossed for some lovey dovey between Ollie and Jay.
P.P.P.S. Did I mention that this is an AWESOME story?
Go to sleep!
(grabs her hang-glider and flies away on the winds of praise) WHEEE~!
Making my readers happy warms all my heartplaces! This is the first time, though, I've stolen someone sleep like this :)
I'm afraid I'll have to let you down here, though: I've actually not written anything like this before. I'm pretty much a newbie writer, as these things go. While I could point you to some forum-threads where I've done some very minor storytelling before (in the range of maybe 4-5,000 words total or so), they're pretty disjointed and often co-written with friends. I had a ton of fun doing those, though, and you could say it was what really got me into appreciating being a part of the writing, rather than just a lurker.
Thanks for reading, and please stay tuned for the next chapters. They'll probably come out on Fridays from here on.
I couldn't help it. Honest.
Once I started reading I just had to know what was on the next page. Metaphorically speaking at least. I read on my iPad, which turned Book 1 into a single very long page. By the time I was done with Book 1 it was getting light outside, but I just couldn't resist reading the next 2 chapters either.
I'll eagerly wait for Friday to get here. I hope I can stave off the withdrawal symptoms until then. In the meantime I'll be shipping for an Ollie×Jay crossing. You never know what crossing you fingers and lighting a candle can do for such things.
Have fun writing the next parts of the story! If you have only half as much fun writing this as I had reading this then even Civ 5 will seem bland and boring in comparison. Keep up the good work in any case. And do you maybe have any tips for any other prospective writers?
Just... one more page!
Haha! I've actually not played Civilisation 5 for weeks now. My attention span tends to jump to the next shiny thing every other day or so :)
Tips for a new writer? I am a new writer! But if I had to pick some tidbits of dubious wisdom, it would probably be:
* Do your homework. A book, like a house, shouldn't be built on an unstable foundation. Make sure you've got your characters and setting more or less clear in your mind (and on file) by the time you start writing. More ideas will come as your world grows, but it will help a ton if you've got a solid ground to stand on before starting that first chapter.
* Imagine the end. Think about how you want your story to end. You have your protagonists, you have a rough idea of the plot - but how will it conclude? Having a set goal will make it a lot easier to keep yourself on track as you write toward that end. It might be a long journey, with lots of twists and turns, but knowing that end will be your lighthouse on a dark sea of creativity.
* Don't be afraid. You'll make mistakes, you'll find yourself with ideas that makes no sense, and you'll do things that seems obvious to you, but the readers will just find puzzling. And that's okay! That's perfectly alright. Every chapter is a learning experience. Take from the previous pages any lessons you can, and make the next one something you can be even more proud of!
* Be ready for inspiration. You can't force good ideas, or amazing plots, or interesting characters. They will come when they're ready, so make sure you have something to write on when the muse brings home a bucket of imagination. Keep a notepad by your bed, one in your purse, and everywhere else. Or just have a monstrous memory. And write it down as soon as you can! Nothing is worse than remembering you've forgotten an amazing thing.
Also, cake.
Cake?
I was under the impression that the cake was a lie. Damn Portal! So the cake wasn't a lie? :P
Thanks for the advice :D.
Tip of the cake
Any time, Angaratoling!
If you come to think of any other tips, let me know!
Have Gun Will, Travel was a HUGE western series
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3vP8zJKiqOY
Okay, now that is out of the way, what hornet's nest has Jaden and Olie stirred up?
Can the Dryad be and others be saved?
For what purpose, other than to make money, were they taken?
And what of our self conscious heroine. When will she reveal herself?
Without that scarf hiding her female body will be very difficult.
And what is the secret(s) behind Rhyce and the crows?
John in Wauwatosa
John in Wauwatosa
if she can
recover the scarf, and its long enough, why not wrap the breasts with it. if she can cross wrap the back it may allow her wings to deploy also.
hell of a cliff hanger there.
great chapter, thanks
Shreds of modesty
Sadly, the tatters of the mirage veil is stuck on a broken piece of roof planks on a storage house in the harbour, and Jaden is currently aimlessly following her new... friend around in forgotten tunnels under the city. Aside from that, Jaden's got a full set of poorly fitting clothes as it is, so it's not as if she's naked!
And while manifesting her spirit form often tend to ruin the clothes on her upper body as the wings burst out, Jaden really don't want to use that form. If she's pressed enough to call upon the inner spirit, any concerns for modesty are probably far from her mind at that point :)
Thanks for reading!
Well that's good
At least she doesn't turn all green and big and mindless and shreds AlL her clothes and winds up naked. Now that would be hard to explain :).
OTOH is she going to turn all red skinned too in 'normal' form as she drifts more and more? That would be moe of a problem then being a girl actually. In that case she might still need a mirage veil of some kind.
Kim
Drifting
All mystics who make regular use of their manifested form show more and more similarities to that shape, but at some point I imagine the changes will slow down and finally stop. Compare with daddy Garen, who has horns, some scales and claws - but is still of normal size and quite humanoid. Alam Hetagon has a bit of a fancy hairstyle and a pair of wings, but not much more than that to show of his gryphon form.
Then again, it has been mentioned that Jaden's case is somewhat strange, so who knows where the point of equilibrium will be? :)
Oh my
So, ummm, does Mrs. Tarasov get the, ummm, 'benefits' from the, erm, Dragon's 'contribution'?
^_^
Kim
All out of vanilla
I like to believe that an intimate relationship between two mystics will be, let's just say, quite spicy indeed! ;)
Well Jaden's spirit was
Well Jaden's spirit was rather humanoid in the first place. I'm not sure how alien demons really are, but Jaden still sleeps, still eats, still drinks and still loves. The only thing that has definitly changed is his appearance. Considering his father's changes those of Jaden might still be "less". In his case it just happens to be more obvious.
I'd also like to know if Jaden is really fully female now, or if he's still male "where it counts".
Demon anatomy
Demons is a grab-all term for ill-natured beings from other realities that cause mischief and disaster in the world of this story. For the purpose of most discussions, though, it's mostly used for the denizens of the Myriad Nether (a specific plane of reality). Are they humanoid? I like to imagine that some conform to our stereotypes of demonkind, whereas others are pretty alien.
As for how far the changes have gone with our luckless protagonist? Jaden really doesn't want to think about that too much right now. Too busy escaping from a class-mate void-beast together with a man that twice survived attempts to burn him alive!
i wasn't
thinking about right now but after you finish your current bout of murphy-ism and she has time to recover it. or is she going to be like from that old "clash of the titians" movie and just haphazardly loose powerful magical stuff all over the place?
Wardrobe malfunction
While I haven't seen that film, I can only imagine :)
As for Jaden, I'm sure she can find something better (anything, really) to use as a bikini-top than a ripped piece of silk. Whether it can be repaired or not, and if that would restore its magical properties, well, that remains to be seen.
I guess we'll have to... reeeaaad and find ooouuut! (sings and flails her arms)
not complaining but
now that I'm current I can only read as fast as you can write. so sing.., I mean write on!
Ow! The whip!
You bunch of slavedrivers! :)
I spent some time consulting my feelings about how to publish this story. For the first book, I had about two-thirds written once I began posting, and then I threw out a chapter every other day until it was completed. Now, I don't have that kind of buffer because I wanted to continue where I left off, so it's down to a chapter-a-week as I write them.
But I can't help but wonder about other authors I respect and enjoy reading, like Morpheus for instance. Is it preferable to finish the whole thing and post it as a single-book format, rather than chapters? I don't know. Maybe I'll do that for book three, but that would mean a month or more between the last chapter of book two, and the publishing of the third instalment.
Ponder-ponder-ponder.
Morpheus....
There are authors that work that way, but I believe Morpheus has a Yahoo group where he posts his stories on a part by part basis. Once he has finished his story, then he posts it on other story sites like this one and fictionmania.tv. He has done one story on a part by part basis here though AFAIK. I could be wrong in all this though, as I've never really found Morpheus' Yahoo group. I did try looking for it, but I was too unfamiliar with Yahoo to figure it out.
I don't really care much which method a writer uses. They each have their advantages and disadvantages. I'd say, work with whatever works best for you.
By drop or by flood
I suppose you're right, Angaratoling. I'll just continue experimenting until I find something I'm comfortable with - but that might have to wait until I'm finished with the Horizons of the Heart series.
Still, I have a lot of ideas and concepts, so it'll be fun to find out :D
The biggest problem with
posting as you go, is you can't easily go back and change things if a plot element pops that needs to be foreshadowed. Morpheus uses his Yahoo group to help him find such problems so he can go back and fix them.
If you can work by posting week by week then by all means continue. I'm addicted!
Hugs
Grover
Final polish
Oh dear. Yeah, that will certainly become a concern once the story becomes more complex. I can already now see some situations where I'd wanted to lay down more of a groundwork for future events...
Oh well! Once I'm finished with Jaden's journey, I'll just have to return to previous books and chapters and do the alterations then. Perhaps that will give previous readers a reason to go back and revisit the completed works, if they're curious about whether they can spot the changes or not? :)
writing
Morpheus has an established pattern and has all the habits necessary to churn out work. He's got what? Over 300 works now? A surprising number of which count as novel length. He can easily write in serial format and know exactly where he's going to end up (when working in a fiction format).
I wish I felt comfortable posting in serial format (I'd probably get at least some positive feedback which would be encouraging) but I don't really trust my ability to plot stuff. I write, quite a bit actually, but I tend to get bogged down and stall (mostly because I can't hammer out a good enough plot structure that will carry me through to the end of an idea). So ... I don't post anything, since I don't want to end up contributing to the vast volume of unfinished stuff out there on this, and many other sites.
I have one novel length-ish work I've been plinking away at for a couple of years now. I've probably put upwards of 80k words into it, but it needs major plot revisions, and a lot of that existing material will probably need to be discarded (which is painful, because I LIKE a lot of it, even though it simply doesn't fit my current conception of where I'm taking my plot). I think it was Stephen King who said "kill the pretty things" in reference to bits of writing that the author likes, but which simply don't fit.
I'm currently working on an entirely different project which has what I THINK is a tighter, better working plot which ... hopefully ... I'll be able to complete. However, I don't personally have any intention to ever post anything that I haven't actually FINISHED writing, simply because I don't trust myself enough. I am sure it was Stephen King who said "Write the first draft with the door closed, write the second with the door open", and that's pretty much what I feel I have to do to get anywhere. I HAVE to complete the first draft before I show anyone anything, because there's such a good chanced that I'll get bogged down and stop working on any given project.
I envy people who can actually write in serial format.
The joy of writing
Everyone writes in their own way, I suppose, and it's a whole process in finding that style that fits you best :)
Also, don't kill the pretty things - transplant them into a separate garden (or notepad), where you can keep them safe until you find a situation that suits them better! I have a big file where I keep things I think are amusing, or sweet, or interesting in some way. Some of it might be useful, some of it might not, but I can go back and reread it to get inspiration for other things.
When I write I tend to do a scene in pretty much stream-of-consciousness fashion first, writing what springs to mind. Then I'll revisit it once or twice as the chapter progresses, if I feel I should add or move something around. Finally, before actually posting, I reread it one final time (since I have to go through it anyway to add italicization tags and such), which often shows things I may have glossed over before.
I guess, in a way it comes down to how hard a critique you are on yourself? If you feel like it's alright to pursue perfection as an ideal, or a practical goal? :)
Remember, in writing (just as in painting), there are no mistakes - just happy little accidents you can always turn into something beautiful later on!
Such a good series.
I'm enjoying getting back to such an amazing story.
*Great Big Hugs*
Bailey Summers
No more so than its awesome readers!
Oh, hullo there Bailey-person! Thanks for saying so :)