I quickly noticed my laughter had a rather manic edge to it that I did not like at all, so I stopped.

"Melvin, go take a bath. Now, please."

Melvin, who had still been dancing in victory, stopped with a suddenly sheepish expression.

"Sorry."

Despite myself, I softened. The kid brought out the worst in me, really.

"It's fine, OK? It's fine. Just... go bathe. you stink a bit."

He nodded and ran back inside his own home. For a brief moment I wondered where his parents were, then dismissed the thought in favor of more immediate concerns. At least now I knew why they were all calling me a lady, though the Muse thing still made no sense.

Made perfect sense to be ultra polite to someone who could dump a lightning bolt on your head. And the term lady here was obviously meant as a salve to the ego. I turned to Ed, who was still poking the dinosaur with his sword.

"It's dead you know, you made very sure."

He nodded with some puzzlement still evident.

"Indeed, though I've no doubt your spell was the true culprit behind the beast's demise. I was simply wondering how good an armor the hide would make. And also whether or not the beast is good to eat."

He must have seen something in my expression.

"What my lady? We don't want it going to waste, do we?"

No, I guess we can't have that. Besides, how would we bury the thing?

"I guess not... just check it for parasites before you go cooking it. Not fond of eating worms."

"A good point. alright you men, get some ropes! We'll drag this thing out of town and cook it there!"

Shudder. Was I the only one that had sanity left? Well judging by the amount of foot dragging as Ed's 'help' threw ropes around the carcass and oxen were brought and harnessed into place, I might not be. though I guess eating it is a better option than burying all of it. Ed only had one deputy, hmm....

"Mayor Conratty?"

Oddly enough for all the of the crowd's low grade roar, the minute I spoke up with a polite tone and only a bit more force than normal, I was heard immediately. The crowd had upon my approach, stifled itself almost completely. No doubt I would be fully ostrasized by nightfall. I shook my head - there were more important things to worry about than my social life.

"Yes lady Muse, what is it?"

"Mayor, Ed only has one deputy."

"Yes, Karl. a bright young lad as I recall, fresh out of college...."

"Yes Mayor, but maybe we need to help them both. I think we should set a watch."

He cocked his head, looking like nothing so much as a turkey in that moment - confused and flightless, with little recourse save waddling and clucking. Or whatever sound turkeys actually make.

"A watch?"

"Yes, a watch. People watching the woods and plains from the outskirts of town to make sure that another predator can't sneak up and attack our friends and neighbors without timely response from us. As it stands, we are nearly defenseless."

The change from bird to calculating politician was immediate and remarkable.

"An excellent suggestion! Philip, find Karl, tell him to pick some men! Good stout men! We can watch at the corners...."

I left the planning session without a word; I had to find Vigo. He wasn't anywhere in the crowd, but well beyond it at the well, back to the stones that made it. Hunched and miserable, unless I missed my guess.

"Vigo."

"N-lady Muse."

"Don't worry, the house isn't as bad as it looks. I think only one room is affected, and maybe the supports for the upper story where the head came in."

"Thank goodness for that - what was it lady Muse?"

Well confusion was a better sight than shell shock, and it seemed to be the order of the day anyway.

"A kind of dinosaur. A T-Rex I think. Remember 'Jurassic Park'?"

"but... how did it get here? I mean one minute I'm looking for my entertainment center, the next there is a face through it. I didn't even the thing come up, though I wasn't really listening for it. I mean, who expects to be attacked by a dinosaur?"

"Well safe to say not a soul worried about it before today. Was there anyone else at home?"

He looked at me oddly for a moment.

"I live alone lady Muse, you know that."

So certain circumstances didn't seem to change. Vigo seemed a small sample to draw from, but he was merely the last. I'd been noting wedding rings, who left and entered certain houses, and oft stolen glances between certain participants. I now felt safe in assuming that marriages, trysts, and any other arrangements survived whatever had happened this morning. Which meant that Vigo's surviving relatives should be states away, and beyond any immediate help we could give or receive.

But you can't take such things for granted when you wake up a wisp of a girl. I was suffering from a severe lack of information, but I was sure of one thing. There were others like me out there, rare as a transformation like mine seemed to
be.

Hopefully there were no worse.

For all I knew, that dinosaur was a dog yesterday. Hey wait, that was a good thought! Vigo had two german shepherds yesterday. Where were they now?

"Vigo, where are your dogs?"

"I don't know, they used to be inside with me, but they lit out when the dinosaur hit the house. Didn't even try to protect me, the cowards."

He dunked the well bucket over his face messily while I pondered. I couldn't blame the dogs, I don't think I'd protect him from dinosaurs either. But....

"Did the dogs sense anything?"

"Yeah they were barking and causing a fuss; that's why I looked out the window in the first place."

"Excellent; do me a favor?"

He turned to me, asking the question with his eyes before his mouth cracked open.

"What do you need, my lady?"

"Go find Karl, and tell him the watch needs dogs. At least 2 dogs with good senses per watch position set."

"Oh, good idea lady Muse! I'll go find him right now!"

And since you aren't really hurt, it'll keep you busy and out of the way. Not to mention less depressed because you're actually doing something pro-active. I stole a glance at Sylvia. Too bad I couldn't do that with everyone. suddenly there was too much noise. Just too many people, talking non stop about things they had no way of knowing about. I couldn't take one
more stupid theory about what had happened.

As before, none noticed me leaving; apparently I could be quiet when I wanted to be. Besides, I couldn't quite shake the idea that there were more clues back at my new/old house. The trip back took almost no time at all; even with the dress trying it's best to trip me, I could manage a respectable speed.

The outbuilding I had passed up earlier was the place to be now; it was a stable. No animals of any kind inside, sweet fresh hay on the stall floors and small tools designed to punch leather placed neatly in order on a large counter. Under that a few well made drawers held other tools of unfamiliar purpose, as well as a few items I understood. Like the curry brushes for example, obviously for horses. I didn't own any though, something I found odd.

I'd seen a few horses already here and there, they had seemed to take the place of cars. I had a car last night. but no horse or any other beast of burden today. So obviously this stable was meant for others. no need for fresh hay in a stable where the owner had no animals, unless said owner expected guests. There were no fences, so I did not own a pasture. the water trough was full, the water clear. Old rain water would be brackish, I'd think.

Though then again, the water may have just been poofed there like the rest of bizarro Amish-world. However out back, behind the stable was another well. This one was much smaller than the town well, with only room for one bucket at a time. The stone was white; I did not recognize it. It also didnt appear to be placed by any mason, instead appearing to have somehow raised
itself from the earth organically.

Evidence of magic perhaps? Something other than calling down destructive forces? But whose hand, mine or anothers?

Just beyond the well was an irrigated garden; no pictures or words, and too early in the season for me to find out what if anything was planted there by looking at the plants themselves. Not that I was an expert in plants. Just beyond the rather large garden were trees, apple and cherry. I knew both of those because in my childhood I had loved both fruits, and researched them with the idea of convincing my mother to plant a tree of each for pies and the like. Turned out that I couldn't even get her to give the planting idea a first thought, let alone a second. Trees of our own could not compete with store bought, it seemed.

After dad died, all thoughts of trees withered; I was a bit busy ensuring we had money to eat at all. But here they were, just as I had envisioned them so many years before. An apple to the left, and a good 60-70 feet away a cherry tree on the right. Both offering shade and little else at the moment, but both very welcome and exactly where I would have planted them. Both
about 8 to 10 years old.

The dark musty rabbit hole yawned before me for a moment; only it was a pitch black inky stretch with a sulfurous smell and unspeakable noises.

"N-Muse! You here?"

And just like that I was back. A little disoriented, I stumbled back towards the house. I knew who was calling me the very instant I heard the voice. It had changed slightly, into a deeper tenor than I strictly remembered last night, but I could still recognize it easily somehow. I could only hope the same thing were true for him. It was of course my drinking buddy. Matt Lockland, son of Brian and now default apprentice smith.

"Here Matt!"

I turned the corner of my new stable to find him approaching it. Tall (more tall than I was, but I was growing to expect that from everyone) with hair a sandy sort of brown and somewhat large liquid blue eyes, he was not quite as impressive as his father was muscle wise, but it was obvious he wasn't too far from it. Yesterday he was all of 5 foot 4 and maybe 150 soaking wet.

It looked good on him. Were my eyes as wide as his?

"So I sort of knew when I woke up you'd be different, but wow... actually seeing the difference is something else."

"Wait, you did? You knew I was different?"

I caught his arm and dragged him back towards the house, but not before he caught a glimpse of the trees. His eyes widened again, realizing the significance immediately. I just kept tugging, and soon enough he answered me.

"Well not exactly, but when dad mentioned a 'Lady Muse' I knew he meant you, and it sort of came out of nowhere. What's going on?"

I snorted - delicately. I don't think I was allowed to sound vulgar in any way anymore. And I don't know where that idea came from. Maybe I'd try later.

"Hmm... interesting, I have no such knowledge regarding any of you. And as for what's going on, your guess is as good as mine. Our world went to hell somehow, all I know."

Perhaps the knowledge regarding people being different only occured when the people you knew were, well, very different? I mean everyone else in town was human. The only certain thing was my list of questions today had just gotten beyond any sane mental length... I'd need to write them all down or something.

I had to drag Matt to a seat in the kitchen, and plunk him down in it. I started making tea for us for something to do.

"Wow, I didn't really want to look at much before I got here, but your kitchen kinda brings it all home, no pun intended."

"You didn't even look at your room? Bet that old Megadeath poster is something really funny today."

"Ugh, don't remind me, I saw it! It was a poster of the God of smithing."

Interesting....

"Oh? Do tell."

"Why? You think it might be relevant?"

I gave him his tea before answering.

"I think it all is. You woke up today a smith's apprentice, with a poster of the God of smiths hanging above your head. what did it say?"

"Vulcan bless our works. It mostly had pictures of a huge guy I assumed to be Vulcan doing forge things."

"Vulcan, huh?"

Wasn't that a roman name for the god of the forge?

"So you didn't have anything like that?"

I snapped back from ponderingsville. Only a year ago, I had posters of bands and the like still present throughout my own animal den. However I took them down in favor of some rather bland landscape prints that, I realized oddly enough, had not changed at all. I remembered seeing them where they had hung in my old house, crude nails rather than little hooks holding them up now, no doubt.

"No, my wall coverings are unchanged, at least to a casual eye. I'm willing to bet they are real paintings as opposed to reprints now. I doubt Guttenburg set up shop in this reality, at least not yet."

"Truer words were never spoken. Looked at your books yet?"

Dread found my core, and twisted it.

"No, only the one that replaced my computer. I take it you have?"

"Well I only own a few really, not the reader you are... and they are right next to my bed, so I couldn't help but see them. I had a few fantasy books, they seem to be the same, though I have a feeling we'd better read them to make sure. My non fiction has changed though. History books seem absolutely fine, but everything else non fiction is just weird. My chevy engine manual for example is now a treatise on how hot flames need to be to correct alloy certain metals, and how to stoke them."

"Ack... Now I don't even want to look. All those books I had."

I had almost no fiction in my mini library. Over half my books were books on laws around the world, or history. The other half were trash that I'd been meaning to get rid of for years. Now it might be interesting to see what those had become... or it might not. After all, Matt's fantasy books seemed unchanged. Hmm, a thought....

"What about the sci fi?"

He shook his head ruefully and drained his tea.

"Those, are a total loss. Nothing survived. Anything with guns, planes, space ships, any of it without being pure history is just gone. I don't know, maybe someone else's books survived, but mine didn't. And I loved me some Battlestar Gallactica books too."

I could sympathyze. If whatever happened were (Gods forbid) permanent, entire generations of people wouldn't know the works of Aasimov, or Bradbury for examples. Heck no guns meant even King would be gone!

I do think we could all live without Clancy, or Patterson however.

"Ok, I want to see your computer book."

My what? Why did dread clutch me again?

"My what?"

"The book your computer became. My computer became a sort of steam engine. Yours became a book. Something tells me there is a weird connection there."

"Really? A steam engine? What does it do?"

I led the way down the hall, leaving the kitchen fire low.

"Heats water currently; Not sure it works right. It's supposed to run a water pump. I didn't really look to hard at it, it wasn't important."

The unspoken thought was there here, and by default I, was important enough to drop everything. I couldn't really fault him for that; aside from my own ego, it was pretty obvious that to solve this thing we would all have to look for the out of place elements. I fit that bill.

I led the way into the den with a flourish.

"Here we are, that's it on the desk."

I took a look at some of the other titles I'd neglected this morning. History, history, periodical... oh hello. My trash might have just become something interesting.

"Got the key for this?"

I resolved to look at the new stuff later.

"Your guess is as good as mine."

"Hmm... I'd guess... around your neck."

I arched an eyebrow. He held his arms out as if I'd attack him.

"Hey, just a guess. Looks like a real old book, full of forbidden knowledge; where else would you keep it?"

I shrugged and fished about my neck, finding a very fine chain there. I pulled it up and lo and behold, a small silver or silver plated key. Very suspicious. I should have felt it before, if only by where it was resting.

"wow, you're good. That is, if this isn't a key to the bathroom or something."

"Do you even have a bathroom? We only have an outhouse, and it stinks."

I shook my head.

"Not sure what I've got. Didn't see an outhouse, but the bathroom has no toilet."

It took some time to work the chain around to see the clasp, it kept wanting to get caught in my ridiculous hair. But in no time I was staring at a simple clasp, very easy for my fingers to work. Larger fingers might have an issue with it though. the key fit smartly in the lock and turned easily with a loud click.

And as I opened the cover, sparkly dust took flight from the book, catching the dim light in a blinding rainbow effect. I blinked my eyes clear and met Matt's, doing the same.

"Not. One. Word."

"but, but... it's fairie dust!"

My small hands were around his large collar, pulling me up to his eye level, since I couldn't pull him down.

"One more word and it's a toad's life for you."

I had no idea how to make good my threat, but I'd find a way!

"Alright, alright your highness, don't get upset."

A glimpse of something... then it was gone. I yelled to cover the disquiet of those casual words.

"Don't call me that, jerk! This is serious. I am not some faerie princess, and if you don't drop it, you will be."

At that the book flipped pages violently while our eyes widened, coming to rest on the page: 'The spirit of matter and how it may be properly shaped by the strong mind'. I could feel my predatory grin split my face. Matt on the other hand, looked lost.

"What's it say?"

"You can't read it?"

He shook his head.

"That's some sort of elven, I can't read it. Though it makes sense that you're bilingual."

I frowned momentarily, then grinned again.

"The book decided to leap to the page regarding polymorphs. I don't think it likes your taunts."

Matt took a step back despite himself.

"OK OK I got it, no more teasing. Just don't let it magic me."

Heh.

"I don't think it can on it's own, it's merely telling me how. It's kind of interesting in it's way...."

Matt reached over me and shut the book in a hurry; I looked up at him, a bit confused. He shrugged but I could tell he was uneasy.

"Study time later, we both know you can do magic. What else should we be looking for?"

I sat down in my overstuffed chair, placing my feet on a footrest in conveniant reach with the ease of familiarity.

"Not sure; I think some of the answers are in homes like ours. like the books, and how our personal stuff has transformed, but I think the big answer of why is out there, in the worrld at large."

Matt seemed less than impressed with my sweeping gesture.

"Probably right, but where? How do we narrow down the search?"

"same way your basic scientist does when confronting a problem; trial and error. It's already big enough to warrant attention from the world, even if it's only affected us. And using the books as evidence, I don't think it has, I think it's a much larger phenomenon. The books suggest as much. If it's larger, even world affecting, then the entire world will be trying to
find a solution. From the best minds down to the mayor Conratty's of the world."

He pulled up a chair. I found myself wanting more tea, but I was comfortable. Sigh.

"So what do you think we should do?"

"What we will end up doing; just about anyone will be able to see that we won't get any answers at all if we sit pat here. We will need to mount an expedition past the town. The mayor and sheriff were already discussing one this morning in fact. It'll be filled with people that can be trusted, but who aren't vital to the performance of the town itself. To be honest, you might
be considered yourself. Though I'm not sure who will go or not. If there are more of those dinosaurs, then the list of people I'd trust to be able to survive out there is small."

"Good point. And I doubt I'd be considered for such a thing, my family is not on good terms with the Conrattys."

My mouth and the door opened at the same time. I shot up, disturbing my stool as a floating tea service came into view. Matt was somehow already behind me, a dagger out and pointed at the vague humanoid outline that could barely be made out in the dim light. a sort of phantom butler... ?

It served us tea, righted the stool, and left. I turned to Matt, took in his dagger... and laughed. Perhaps a touch of this morning's hysteria in it, but good cleansing laughter. Matt looked stubbornly angry for a moment, then laughed a bit himself.

"Sorry, and before you ask, no I didn't plan that. I guess I need to watch my stray thoughts around this pile of rocks. I wanted more tea."

"That was an honest to goodness phantom servant wasn't it? Just like in...."

I cut him off, laughter forgotten.

"Yes, just like in the game."

He leaned back in his chair.

"You know, for a tiny hot elf chick, you sure can make with the fear."

"Sorry."

"It's OK, I know where you're coming from. I bet they are loving this bullcrap though. I'd just as soon have a car."

Anger and hatred were buried just as quickly as they had surfaced, hopefully never to return. Though I knew better; we all have darkness and stupidity inside us. The trick is not to let it rule.

"Now see that's what I'm talking about; when you smile you really show a person what the phrase 'light up a room' means."

Was he hitting on me?!?

"And when you blush you look especially cute."

He was, the rat - bastard!

"Out out out! I want some peace now, need to think without your constant teasing!"

He managed to look contrite, but I was pretty sure he was faking. I started shoving him out the den.

"Alright, sorry. I know, I'm going. It's a way to cope, you know? I'm pretty freaked out by all this. And you well, despite how you look, you're you. Normal.

And safe, you know he's thinking I'm safe to mess with. Wow, what could I say to that?

"I get it Matt, and I'd love to have you stay and chat all day, but I need some alone time to think."

"Yeah I get it. You won't stop thinking about it, and won't let the problem or weirdness or whatever rest unresolved. It's your nature, you can't let a mystery stand. Be back later and lock your door. You can never tell what people will do in a crisis."

I nodded as he strode out.

"Sound advice, see you later."

He waited till he heard my bolt slam home, then walked off, whistling. the street was empty except for him, but I didn't see any strange creatures lurking. Either there was nothing else or the watch was working. Then again, I'd heard no alarm, and I was out of shout range of the other parts of town.

Whoops, can't think of everything. It was probably fine. Now for the more important thing. I thought really hard about unexplored areas of my house. I was praying I didn't go low tech enough for a chamberpot, cause that is just gross. I'll reinvent the toilet if I have to! though... how DID a toilet work? something about a gasket flooding water down into a bowl when opened, and releasing a valve at the same time. I think.

Judging from Matt's own knowledge loss, I doubt even a plumber knows how a toilet works today. Depressing thought.

My thoughts of toiletry did have an effect. They summoned the phantom butler, who gestured me to follow him/her/it. that's it, I'm naming the thing. I mean it's a construct, not even a ghost. I don't remember casting the spell for it. I also don't remember seeing it this morning, which is a mild issue. Perhaps my disorganized thoughts and anything but calm mind had affected
it? It did seem summoned by my thoughts.

At any rate, it led me to what I had taken to be a hall closet my first time through. Perhaps because originally it had been a hall closet, next to the bathroom (which of course it still was). Opening it I recieved a mild shock. A small room with a porcelain bench and opposite, a porcelain sink. the bench of course, had a hole cut or shaped out of it in the center, and the sink was filled with water. There were no taps or pipe work anywhere I could see.

So an indoor outhouse? That sounds even worse than a chamber pot. Why didn't it stink? Oh well; I shut the door on the servant who thankfully hadn't followed me inside, and settled in. I had to go of course, and that was one of the reasons I wanted Matt out of the house. Knowing he was lurking with me trying to find a bathroom would have been... weird.

And of course porcelain is cold. Very cold, even on warm days it seems. But finally I got done and started to stand up, when the first of two rather immediate oddities struck me... quite literally. The first being water all over my new parts, as if just that region was inundated in sweetly scented (rose hips?) water. As I goggled and stood up to see where it was coming from, just like that I was dried. As if those same areas and only those, had been subjected to a blow dryer.

But there had been no heat, it was more as if the water was just encouraged to go elsewhere, with no clingy moisture left behind. Looking down I had caught a glimpse of a faint blue glow and a sighing gurgle acosted my ears at the same time. Of the urine or of any water, there was no sign; I couldn't see all the way down into the bench, but somehow I knew nothing was there
save maybe a bit of dust.

Hmm, magic toilet. Beats an outhouse any day of the week. Feeling fresh and clean I turned to the sink. There was lye soap next to the sink bowl and I grabbed it, dipped my hands into the water and lathered up. Technically I hadn't touched any - sensitive areas, but it never hurt to be clean, right? Besides, the sink is magical too, I just know it. They are companion
pieces after all.

I was right, after washing my hands I removed them from the water, and as soon as they were past six inches they were dry. Just like that, and even looking I hadn't seen how it was done. Just one moment wet, and the next dry. The soapy water was also just as suddenly markedly less soapy. As clean as if it had just been placed in the basin, in fact.

Downright handy. Now if I just knew how it was done. Or maybe I did, and needed to remember? Ugh, my head hurts just thinking of it all, and of course aspirin is a distant memory. Silly body needs satisfied for the moment, I went back to the den, grabbed my magic book and dragged it into the kitchen. Stupid thing was large and heavy. I brewed tea and opened it to the
first page:

"To my darling Muse on her naming day; may this enchanted book of profundities serve you well wherever you may roam. Love, father."

Well that was odd, my dad was the religious type. He'd have burned the new me at the stake. Second page:

'on the nature and spirit of fire.'

That's better.

(tbc)