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Kit and Kin
by poetheather |
Takeshi Saito was a quiet student who kept his head down in Ravencrest High School trying to get along. But strange things happen in this small town and the spotlight finds those who would rather hide. So Takeshi finds himself pulled from his happy geek corner to somewhere else, somewhere he is not sure of.
January 21
Making it inside, Maeko shook her head. Maggie was really something else. She had not expected that kind of reaction from the girl who had bloomed last fall, but then again they had had a different dynamic before with the whole guy/ girl thing so that could account for everything. It was kind of weird when she thought about it. Maybe this was a taste of what her parents meant by the whole ‘living a girl’s life’ business. The way she had to relate to Wallace was different and the way she was relating to Maggie was different and that had nothing to do with who she was but with the body she was wearing. That required some consideration and a bit of reframing as to how she saw reality.
She spotted Uncle Satoshi standing in the living room. “Oh hey, Aunt Chiharu is here.”
He grinned and hefted the suitcase that was part of his cover for the next part of this deception. “Okay. Well gotta go. You take care of yourself Maeko. And if you need any help with the local Fae or anything, give me a call. I can talk to the Princess and she can overrule them in nothing flat.”
She blinked a few times. That was a strange notion. “Really?”
“Well, if Morgan thinks it’s a good idea and not really overstepping her bounds then yeah. She likes me. I’m helpful.” He gathered her up in a big hug. “You take care, no joke. Play your part. Be smart. Saitos are smart, that’s why we live so long.”
With a smile, she kissed him on the cheek and said, “Thanks Uncle Satoshi. Talk to you later.”
He took his suitcase and put on a hangdog expression, heading outside, calling out, “Bye haha! Bye mom!”
The door closed behind him and the little family was finally truly alone for the first time since this whole thing began at the family’s compound up in the hills. Her mothers moved over to her and enveloped her in a big hug, enveloping her in warmth and love. After a few moments, they released her and Maeko said, “So, I suppose I should see to my room?”
“That sounds good.” replied her mom. “There is probably some tinkering to be done.”
Heading upstairs, her kasa casually asked, “So do you have any idea what you want your room to look like now that you are no longer a guy?”
“Not really? I figure I should try and make it look California and teen girl and maybe… uhm… a bit lesbian.” She ended her sentence a bit hesitantly, wondering if they were going to catch that last part.
“Wait what? Did we miss something?” asked her kasa, surprised by this new wrinkle in the situation. Two pairs of eyes turned onto Maeko, demanding clarification.
“Uhm… well… you see… it’s like this, Maggie asked for a reason why “MOM” and I were fighting and Wallace was sort of flirting with me and I really needed something on the serious side that got me here and managed to shut down Wallace at the same time because that is a world of ewww, so I sort of told them that I had been dating or rather seeing someone against “MOM”s wishes and she is a punkskatergirlwhowasintodrugs.” Maeko ended in a rush, blushing furiously and looking down at the very fascinating carpet in the hallway.
There was a moment of quiet as that whole tirade got translated and then her parents started laughing. Maeko frowned as her mothers sort of fell against each other in their evident enjoyment of this whole thing. Between gasps, her mother said, “That’s beautiful. You being all googly eyed over some punk girl into drugs. Oh my God… that… so damn funny.”
Her kasa wiped tears from her eyes and reached out, drawing Maeko into a hug, kissing her temple. “I adore you baby. You do know that right?”
Maeko cocked her head and tried to make sense out of the two adults. “What’s so funny?”
Wiping tears from their eyes, the two adults were shaking their heads, still trying to bring themselves under some sort of control after that revelation. “It is a perfect story baby.” commented her haha, trying to control her snickering. “It has outrage, indignation and all the things that fit for sending your child across the country to relatives. Let me guess, because you are such a sweet kid, you made it a bit clear that it was the drugs that got you sent here and not the fact that you were a lesbian?”
“Well, yeah… I mean what’s wrong with being a lesbian?” Maeko was clearly confused again at this point.
Her mothers were being weird again and that was not helping with her ability to understand all of this.
Her mothers hugged her again, kissing her lovingly. “Nothing baby, nothing at all.”
The trio of vixens opened the door to her room and went inside. Looking around they all tried to figure out what needed to change to best reflect the change in tenants. There were a variety of posters on the wall that did clearly did not go with the personality that they had created and she had modified but she was still at a loss for what to do with everything. Looking at all of this she was hit with the enormity of the task of how one rebuilt their life to actually reflect who they were once they had changed genders. Her mind threatened to Blue Screen of Death and she needed to think of some way to deal with this. “Uhm… help?”
“Why don’t we start with getting your old clothes out and your posters down? That sounds easy, right? Don’t try to go too far ahead or you will panic.” suggested her haha gently, resting a hand on her shoulder.
Maeko nodded, clearly overwhelmed by the enormity of the task before her. There was no way that she could do this. After a few deep cleansing breaths, she started taking things out of her drawers and tossing them onto the bed, things she would never wear again. Some of it made her sad; as she liked some of the t-shirts and hoodies she had collected that had geeky sayings. The geek persona had not been a complete act, it had just been pushed a bit farther than it would have normally been. She did like the comics and the like just not to the extreme that she had felt she had needed to take things for the role. She even liked the girl who was working at the comic store as she really knew her stuff and was friendly. She was even nice to look at.
Things got divided, with a few of her posters and figurines making the cut, as a few things were determined to work for Maeko that had worked for Takeshi, mostly some of the cuter figurines and the Mia Hamm poster. There was another US Women’s Soccer poster as well that would probably work. A poster for The Avengers that focused on Black Widow was also kept because no one could think of a good reason not to keep it.
Once that was done, Maeko looked at the mostly bare walls and the mound of clothes that were not hers, not anymore. The weight of everything seemed to close in on her and she sat heavily on her bed as her knees threatened to give out. Tears started to fall and with some effort she managed to choke out, “Why did this happen…” before the sobs took over.
Her parents sat on either side of her on the bed and leaned in comfortingly, arms tight around her. Her mother said, “Let it out baby. You have been so brave facing this and I know it really sucks. We didn’t expect this to happen to you and we have been worried about you ever since. But boy or girl, you are still our baby and always will be. And despite everything, you still would be a werefox/ Kitsune mix at the end of the day.”
Her kasa leaned in and said, “I know this whole thing has to be rough on you baby. You are losing so much of who you are and it has to feel like you got nothing out of it.”
Pepper appeared and flew over, hugging Maeko’s head, burrowing into the girl’s auburn hair. “Don’t cry Foxgirl. I am really happy that I got to meet you and I get to follow you around and everything. You are the nicest foxgirl I have met!”
That got Maeko to snicker and helped slowly to work her out of the funk she had found herself in. Her haha nudged her and said, “Come on. We need to get the California Kid some sheets that fit her and other stuff for her room and a good coat. Grace, can you finish things in here?”
Her mother looked over everything and nodded with a slight smile. “Sure, I can take care of that. When you come back it will be ready for Maeko to move in and put her new mark on the world.”
Being helped up by both her parents, Maeko sighed very theatrically. “So I gotta go shopping?”
“Just relax and try to think of it this way. Like your cover you are going in to new stores to see mostly new things. This can be an adventure. Enjoy it.”
“Yes kasa. I will try.”
“Good. Now grab your purse and let’s get going. See you love.” Her parents kissed as Maeko grabbed her purse.
Once downstairs, she grabbed the coat that had been summoned for her by her Aunt and headed outside to the car so she could get it warmed up. Shortly her kasa came out and they headed into downtown to some of the shops that sold household goods. Getting a nice sheet set and comforter was one of the first purchases, as well as a long mirror and a few other items that her kasa said would come in useful. Then they hit one of the other stores, one that her mothers often shopped at, to pick up the coat and a couple of other pieces of clothing that were more fitting for the weather than the clothes that filled the suitcases. The long coat would help cover more of her while she headed to school and the slightly lighter California clothes would be fine once she got inside.
She remained aloof, not really engaging with anyone, like the plan meant for her to do, playing with her cell phone instead of interacting with a bunch of the sales people who were trying to meet the new girl. She did note that the store’s owner seemed to sniff a bit deeper as she was close by. That was a bit odd and instead of thinking about that she texted Maggie, ‘Sorry about earlier.’
A few minutes later her phone buzzed and she looked at it. It was Maggie. She smiled and read the text, ‘K Welcome 2 town.’
‘Thanks’
‘busy tomorrow?’
‘getting settled’
‘I will show you around town Monday’
‘Sounds great’
Maeko smiled happily. This was a nice development. Maybe Maggie and she would be able to become friends again. That would make this whole thing easier if she managed to make ‘new’ friends out of at least one of her old ones. Of course, there was no telling what and who she would be meeting Monday. As long as she was not bothered by the usual idiots it should all be good. Any day without bullying would be a good day in her opinion.
“Ready to go?”
“Yes Aunt Amane.” said Maeko in her best indignant teen tone.
They headed out to the car with their purchases and once safely in the car her kasa asked, “Is everything okay?”
“For the most part. It looks like I am becoming better friends with Maggie, which is cool but I think that Wallace was flirting with me.” admitted Maeko.
“That has to be hard. What about the whole guy code thing that says that you aren’t supposed to hit on their sister.”
Maeko rolled her eyes. Guy code? This wasn’t a TV sitcom. “I don’t know. I guess half-sister that didn’t grow up with me and that I never mentioned before doesn’t really count in his book. But ugh… kasa, it’s Wallace! I can’t possibly do that. That’s like incest or something.”
“He doesn’t know that baby. All he sees is a beautiful girl.”
“But I do.”
“Okay, but can you try to break it to him gently. You don’t want to hurt your friend. Even with telling him you are a lesbian does not mean that he’s going to stop hitting on you. And with you only being a sophomore that makes it even more likely that people will question you. Guys seem to think that it just means you haven’t had the right guy cure you. ” Her kasa shook her head in disgust at that last part.
Maeko looked a bit shocked at that and swallowed heavily. “Was… was I ever that bad?”
Her kasa reached over and rested a hand comfortingly on her leg, “No baby, you were never like that. You were always proud of us and never seemed to see women that way. However, a lot of guys do, but not all guys. Your mother knows more about all of that through her Women’s Studies stuff, about rape culture, male privilege and all of that. You can ask her about it if you want. It is actually really interesting and kind of scary. But what do I know; I’m just a dumb jock.”
“Kasa, you’re not just a dumb jock.” chided Maeko.
“Well, okay, not just a jock. But I am a jock as well as being pretty smart. But the thing that you have to remember is, guys have a hard time seeing girls as being at the same level as them, of being equal. Because girls are not as big or as strong, on the whole, they are of course lesser. You haven’t had to grow up seeing this, how boys take this idea as a matter of course, how they just assume girls are into them as a default. Sure there are variations, and guys with depression and gays and such but a lot of guys don’t even think of the privilege that they have in our culture just by being male. And don’t even get me started on wereguys, some of them are just terrible, with some of the wolves are possibly the worst of the bunch. So learning to be careful around guys and to take care of them gently is probably in your best interest, mainly to give you a tactical and strategic skill to deal with them. It sucks that women have to deal with them in such a way, but that’s kind of life if you’re a woman.”
Maeko blinked as she took that in. It was a lot and she was familiar with some of the ideas, having heard bits of this before in her parents conversations. But to realize that a lot of this now applied to her… it was like getting dunked into ice water. “So, what you are suggesting is that I should be nice to Wallace about this, kind of apologize for being bitchy and just say he isn’t my type?”
“That should work, to make sure that there are no misunderstandings. Think of it like fighting with either wind or water. You need to dance around their issues, lead them, letting their own power cause them to lose. That is how women fight. Earth and fire are more of a man’s approach. Try thinking of it that way.”
With a nod, Maeko agreed with her haha. That did make sense though it was a bit overwhelming. So much about her life had to change because of this transformation she had undergone, and not the one into the supernatural creature. It was mind boggling. All of this change was even spilling into fighting styles? How was she ever going to be able to keep all of this straight? Sure everyone told her that just living her life would make a lot of this second nature that simply living a girl’s life would make her a girl, but that didn’t seem to make a lot of sense to her at this point. She figured this was one of those things where she just had to trust that her parents knew what they were talking about.
Once they got home, her bedroom had been quite changed, with things moved around, and in slightly different positions. The bed was in a different position, giving the room a completely different look. The dresser and credenza were also moved to different places. The bookshelf was against another wall near her small desk and there was a new piece of furniture with an oval mirror attached. Maeko blinked as she took all of this in, “You did this yourself?”
“Oh yeah.” replied her mother, quite proudly. “I shifted forms and that made me plenty strong.”
Her kasa sighed, rubbing her temples and said, “Did you at least remember to pull the drapes this time?”
“Yep. No free shows for the neighbors. And all the old clothes are boxed up and in the garage so we can take them to Goodwill or something. I brought up my old vanity so you had something to use to help you put on makeup or what have you. Do you like it?” Her mother was grinning broadly, as she gestured at the room.
Maeko looked over things and smiled, “It looks good. Thanks mom.”
“Anytime. Now let’s get these things put up or away and we can spend the rest of the weekend goofing off. I don’t know about you, but these last few days have been really crazy.”
Maeko giggled as her haha smacked her mom lightly in the back of her head.
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Comments
What is the difference
What is the difference between male and female sexism? The name. Female sexism is called womens/gender studies...
Seriously, I hope Maeko doesn't just accept and believes the stuff her parents tell her about privileges and stuff. Males have instincs, females have instincts and females also have privileges. I'm not sure if it's a good idea to tell her new daughter all the great privileges she has lost...
Whatever, great story... I can't wait to see what happens next,
Beyogi
In the US the differences
In the US the differences between Men and Women seem to be far greater, especially now. It is being taken to ridiculous extremes, to nearly 1950 levels of absurdity. The things male politicians are trying to forcing onto women is just abhorrent. It is this sort of disparity, this sort of blatant sexism and such that she was speaking of, and remember she did say that not all men are like that, but some are. She is trying to prepare Maeko for the men who have that mindset.
And yes, there are some women in women studies programs who take things too far in the other direction. They have a big hate on for men and want to punish them as much as they can. They often times don't have the power to really hurt them. Right now the power of culture is firmly on the side of the men.
But so it goes.
Heather
We are the change that will save the world.
blatant sexism / bigotry
Its not a terrible thing to give a simple warning really. No not everyone is that way, male or female, but like any bigotry it can be quite an eye opener if you haven't experienced it before.
As for the political climate, scares me quite a bit, whats next overturn the 19th amendment..sigh
-Elsbeth
Is fearr Gaeilge briste, ná Béarla clíste.
Broken Irish is better than clever English.
Yeah, a simple warning is a
Yeah, a simple warning is a good thing and can help motivate a newly made girl to keep her eyes open. And you are right, not everyone is that way. It is the people who are that way and the damage that they can cause that warrants a degree of healthy caution. Not enough to make you afraid of the world, but enough for you to not blindly trust peoples intentions.
And yeah... the political climate is a scary thing. Makes me worried for our country. Sometimes I feel like the US is trying its best to become a third world Banana Republic.
Heather
We are the change that will save the world.
There actually is an
There actually is an interesting thing. The greater the economic success and the greater the personal freedom is in a society, the greater are the gender differences.
The attitude mom and haha are displaying are really making me wonder how they felt about their child before. The whole outcast geek thing might be nothing but preparation to enjoy the new girlhood or something. I don't know if they're really that manipulative, but after giving such a speach to their newly transformed kid I really wonder about them.
Actually they remind me of a father warning his son that all women are whores and parasites to menkind citing the fact that women spend about 80% of the money, but only earn 30%. If she really adapts this kind of attitude it would really be better if she was a lesbian.
About hurting guys... well, I think the rape awareness crap has brought more than too many innocent guys in trouble and into prison. Remember what they did to the french president candidat? Something like that can happen to any guy and if he can't afford expensive judges he'll be butt raped for 10 years or so. Great isn't it? The fact that women own their children, is no power at all...
Well whatever, I hope Maeko reminds her mothers that there are always two sides of a coin. Prejudices only make you look for the flaws in a person and not their strenghs and good points. Maybe someone turns into a macho towards a female, but that might be very well nothing but a tactic to camouflage his awkwardness. It's always easier for a guy to deal with your mates than to deal with a female friend.
Some people are just idiots, but if someone suddenly changes into an idiot I'd go and look for reasons instead of just feel affirmed in my prejudices - at least I hope I would.
Sorry for ranting, but this "we know men are assholes" stuff in TG stories strikes me as rather silly.
Power in general is in the hands of a small minority/elite which controls most productive capital and the mass media. Wether those people are male or female doesn't matter at all for the great majority of people.
meh, whatever,
Beyogi
At no point did Amane say
At no point did Amane say that men are assholes, or indicate that all men acted this way. She was talking about perceived social power inequalities which do exist. Not all men act that way, which she did state. Just in case you missed that part. Let me repeat it again just to be clear, Amane did state that not all men are that way but some are. She did not deal in absolutes.
Amane is talking about something that is sadly pervasive in American culture. She is trying to talk about a skill that a lot of women learn as they grow up, about wording things in such a way as to avoid hurting people emotionally. This is a skill that is practical and has use in dealing with men who can be touchy about their egos or girls with touchy egos. It is a skill bound in the idea that words have power and can be used to hurt or heal or deflect.
As for the idea of rape culture, that is the idea where the rapist in not really to blame for his actions, he merely has urges. The victim is often attacked for leading the rapist on and crap like that. The system attacks the victim instead of the rapist, who is assumed to have no responsibility for their actions, they were overwhelmed by their urges. That sort of idea, of a denial of personal responsibility and attacking the victim has been the norm in the American justice system for at least ~52 years (since the late 50s early 60s). It is shameful.
This is also not saying that all men are rapists. It is saying that a system where men are not encouraged to take personal responsibility for their actions, where doing things to drunk chicks is 'okay', where no one calls guys on this crap where they hit on women and don't back off when the woman says no. This is not okay. There are huge groups of men who are not like that, who don't support that system, but unfortunately they are outnumbered by guys who really love that life. There are songs that glorify it after all.
Amane is trying to get Maeko to think about her changed status and how some of the rules for her have changed. Pointing out that fact is pretty damn sobering, as given Maeko's reaction to it. Wallace is not being a jerk or even all that bad, but by telling Maeko this she has also spun a way for a very freaked out Maeko to apologize for snapping at a friend. If she acts nice to Wallace in this manner, this means that the friendship is not lost because Maeko freaks out over finding out her friend is attracted to her. Misdirection is a ninja's friend.
And as for the whole gender inequality matter... this press release should prove to be interesting reading. It was a fascinating read for me and made me think.
Heather
We are the change that will save the world.
The problem is that those
The problem is that those cited social power inequalitie are mostly class differences. Because really, what can a man do socially what a woman can't? One can very easily turn the thing around. The so called male priviledge of initiative in relationships can also be seen as duty of begging for female attention. The gender-wage-gap can also be seen as the fact that a man needs to earn more money than a woman to be considered a worthy mate.
I'm pretty sure not only women need to learn that skill. Do you remember how conversations with male friends changed once a woman entered the room/conversation? Everyone needs to learn that. "Honey, do you think this shirt makes me look fat?" "Yes?!" No, that won't be the answer. I think her mother is right to warn Maeko that the playing field has changed, but she doesn't really give helpful advice. She really needs to find a way to let her friend down without humiliating him even when he doesn't instantly get it.
Rape culture is something that stems from anecdotal evidence. If some policemen sigh about the fact that another woman dressed like a whore was raped in a redlight district I can actually understand their waryness. That doesn't mean that society or men in general condone such behavior as ok, because it's thanks to instincts. Most men do have sisters, girlfriends and mothers after all. It's bloody bullshit that the system attacks the victim. The system demands some evidence before opening a trial. IIRC american universities don't even demand that and even kick the "pepetrator" from uni if their story is less believable or something. How many women have actually been jailed for pressing fraudulent rape charges? Almost none. I mean remember what happened to the french president candidate? He was publicily humiliated after a charge by a known con woman. I don't call destruction of professional life thanks to a bloody charge as system biased for men.
Why is doing things to drunk guys ok? Why do you drink that much that you feel like running to the police the next day? Do you really want to jail men for fucking drunken women? Don't women have any responsibility at all? Sorry, but I demand from women that they adhere to the same standards they demand from men. I mean female on male violence is hillarious, male on female violence is a crime. IIRC there is this utterly biased violence against women law. Why isn't it violence against people? Nowadays it is ok to be sexist as long as it is against guys.
The problem is that there are always assholes, even groups of assholes, but that isn't enough to declare the whole culture a "rape culture". The equivalent is the "whore culture" where men only exist as a means/canonfodder to satisfy female needs. It only depends on the point of view. A guy that has been burned by females might take on the view that women are parasites who are supported by daddy state in their eternal juvenile princess fantasies. A woman who has been burned by men might take on the "rape culture" perspective, which is as much bullshit but might be understandable from her subjective perspective. The thing is both perspectives are not normal. They don't show reality, they show a biased view of reality. A reality seen by hurt people. Neither is a perspective one should teach children if one doesn't want to indoctrinate them into a hate culture.
You're right though, Maeko needs to be aware that things have changed for her. It's wrong to go the "oh guys are so privileged" way. Why not show her the great things about beeing a girl and also teach her how to deal with guys. It's not like she can't be friends with Wallace anymore. Even if he's an idiot. If she thinks he's worth as a friend, it should be worth to help him through his wrong ideas.
I guess it's really just semantics in the end, but I'm rather annoyed of feminst crying privilege blindness to anyone who doesn't agree with them, but utterly fail to see their own privileges. Your statistic for example is kind of interesting. Apparently gender equality is a luxus achievement of humanity. Only the rich nations can afford it. And the whole statistic is biased. The fact that the score can't get higher than 1.0 means that only female disadvantages are tested, but not wether women are actually privileged somewhere. The statistic doesn't check discrimminations against guys. That means that in Sri Lanka apparenlty 2 times as many women enjoy tertiary education (college and stuff) than men. WTF? In Sweden 1.5 times as many women go to university as men. I'd really love to know how they found out the "wage earned for similar work" stuff. There is 0.62 for germany which is even less paid than the feminist claim. And the statistics says more men than women enjoy tertiary education in germany... I know for a fact that more women are enrolled at university and earn their degrees than men. Sorry, but this WEF-Gender-gap-report is very suspect to me. It seems as if they compare apples with pears.
It's really the oh woe me attitude that gets to me. I mean I know gender roles suck. Women are breeding chambers who's only purpose is to squeeze out the next generation and do as much as they can for their own support/ to support their mates, while men are the canonfodder for society if they aren't on top of it. There are problems and society needs to fix them, but it can't be done by assigning blame. (I guess that wasn't your intention, the "rape culture" stuff is just such a thing imho)
Sorry for ranting, I guess I just was disapointed with the way you had Amane put it... I still like the story though ;)
Thank you for writing,
Beyogi
The kind of sexism ...
... passed onto Maeko in that little speech has a lot of knee-jerk acceptance these days. It's easy to paint the majority of men as being somehow less than women, and by extension even sub-human, since no one out there usually lifts a finger to defend the so-called "privileged" sex. Most men I have known are intelligent, thoughtful and caring individuals. Just because the actions of some of them scare or anger us does not give women the right to pass judgement on them all.
To flip it around as an example, I don't want to be automatically thought of as some kind of manipulative bitch just because some women ARE manipulative bitches. And I certainly don't want to be "managed" by then men I meet who don't know me as if I really AM one, because someone told them once that all women are just looking to get whatever they can out of a man.
Men and women aren't angels or demons. We're just people, living our lives and doing the best we can, no matter what our gender. I hope Maeko gets the chance to deal with men and boys as people, as opposed to as the emotionally stunted, immature animals her mentors seem to believe them to be.
Randalynn
I have known a lot of men who
I have known a lot of men who do not fit that pattern but I have met more that do. I met some that knew me during transition and I could actually see the change in the way he treated me. I have personally been party to sexism in the academic world and the normal world. I have gotten different treatment from doctors, been basically talked down to because I was a woman. This is all first hand experience. So, yeah, this stuff is real.
Now, a lot of guys are not that bad but some are. That is what she was saying, some are bad and you need skills to deal with that. This sort of thing can be really bad in high school where you have guys acting all butch and manly, pushing themselves on people and have guys getting bullied as well. A lot of guys seem to grow up learning a sort of dominance establishing thing that they use on everyone, to ensure that they are the ones in charge. This assumption that this is the norm is part of the male privilege, especially the white male privilege. I covered this a great deal in my diversity class for Mental Health Counseling when trying to help a lot of the predominantly white hetero Christian middle class students understand the idea of privilege based on race and gender. It shook some of them pretty hard. Myself, the other lesbian and the two POC were completely unfazed as we were aware of this stuff. Sure some of this stuff was a bit new, as I hadn't heard of a few of the newer ideas, but I was familiar with the concepts. If you haven't seen this or are familiar with this please watch this short vid - Unpacking the Invisible Knapsack the essay is here. They are both very enlightening.
While that deals primarily with race, some of the same can be said of gender. When a lot of the cultural norms are geared towards men, it of course creates a degree of privilege. Yes there are guys who are more aware of these issues and try to not be jerks about it, but there are also guys who revel in it. To deny it exists or to act like it is less pervasive than it really is does nothing to fix the problem. To fix any problem you first have to see it for what it is. This sexism is a problem. Some guys are trying to fix the problem. Some guys are trying to make it worse. That's how it goes.
Heather
We are the change that will save the world.
I'm just saying that ...
... the minute you start off assuming the worst of the people you deal with, you've already created an expectation that is easily met by even the most innocuous of actions. By warning Maeko in generalities, his parents have created an "us versus them" dichotomy that applies to every human with a Y chromosome – the same operating instructions you seem to accept as valid. The fact that Maeko WAS male a short time ago doesn't seem to matter to them.
Ever since I was a young girl, I've felt society's expectations guiding me and often getting in my way. It's part of being human, being shaped by the community in which you live and grow. The toughest part of growing up and becoming a woman was realizing that personal experience trumps anecdotal evidence, and the best way to get experience is not to treat every encounter with the unknown with trepidation. Dealing with men as if every meeting is an opportunity for them to look down on you limits your perceptions and makes you less able to see reality as it is, instead of through your own filter. If you view every exchange as an attack waiting to happen – every man as some kind of unexploded bomb you need to approach with caution – you will forever be bound in your own head as a potential victim of abuse or belittlement that may never come.
I learned a long time ago that, if i walked out my door every morning expecting to be raped, I'd be just as imprisoned as if I locked myself in my house to be safe and never left. "To boldly go" isn't limited to exploring the galaxy. Sometimes, it means leaving your expectations behind, and embracing the possibilities that other people are just ... people.
Randalynn
The other thing to remember
The other thing to remember is that she has been trained to be ready for combat, which gives you a different mentality. That is why at the end Amane talked about how certain combat styles were more fitting than others. And that is what she is trying to get through to Maeko. She still has to be on her guard but in a slightly different fashion. Living your life in a martial mindset is different than living in other ways.
Besides, how Maeko translates this stuff is different from what is said, because teenagers are ornery.
Heather
We are the change that will save the world.
Meh try doing that in the middle of Iran or Pakistan
I hope that you don't over generalize either.
Kim
What really sucks
What really sucks is when people treat you as if you are prejudiced. It gets tiresome to dance around someone's expectations when they have a chip on their shoulder.
In a more global sense, expecting certain behavior actually fosters it. We did an experiment in social psychology class where a group of people all wore a sign that they couldn't see, but which told the rest of the group how to treat them. Eventually, they started acting they way they were expected to act.
Yeah, that's true, just like
Yeah, that's true, just like people jumping all over Amane and Grace, assuming that they are anti-men based off of one comment that is not as anti-man as some people are taking it.
Yes, expecting certain behavior actually fosters it. Acting as if someone is bound to attack you at any moment makes you look the victim, thus a target. Act strong people will see you as strong. There are lots of experiments that show this is true, on both the good and bad.
Heather
We are the change that will save the world.
Kit and Kin 10
To me, all genders are created equal.
May Your Light Forever Shine
See my response above. While
See my response above. While I think we are equal, the culture does not treat them as equal.
Heather
We are the change that will save the world.
Other way now
I have been seeing things go a little on the other way now with gender and race at least for no to low experiences jobs. I lost my job about a month ago and am looking for anther job, I have only been given one interview to this point though my one friend was fired from serveral jobs for not showing and calling off to much or just not coming in yet she can go and get a job really fast. Also I have seen where I had more experience in something working 4 years at a resturant and a girl or black person got a job before me with no exp.
I have seen statistics to
I have seen statistics to that effect as well, as well as current statistics that said that women kept their jobs more often during the Recession. Not sure why that is but the analyst said it was because the women were more used to dealing with things more flexibly. Who knows?
And while that may be true for low income jobs, many of the positions of power, such as CEOs, and governmental positions are held disproportionately by men. It is slowly trying to balance out, but it is still very much a work in progress. There is a large pay disparity and women do not get the same respect that men get. It is pretty stupid, but it is the way the culture works at the moment. Getting past that takes time and the need for society to stop backsliding now and again.
And hiring practices in general are kind of sucky if you ask me. Sorry you got screwed over.
Heather
We are the change that will save the world.
Yay!!
Another great chapter of Kit and Kin :D.
Thanks for writing it and keep up the good work.
Speaking For Morgan
Before I forget, speaking for Morgan I agree the Saito are helpful :)
-Elsbeth
Is fearr Gaeilge briste, ná Béarla clíste.
Broken Irish is better than clever English.
YAY... the Saito are
YAY... the Saito are somebodies!
Heather
We are the change that will save the world.
Ineed they are
And they seem to be about themost supportive of the parents who have had a child under-go the sex change along with the were manifestation. Good to see that there's another family that actually puts family first. Nota bunch going on in this chapter, but that's alright. There are things getting set up that I suspect are going to turn into a rather amusing slice-of-supernatural-life story with plenty of promise. :)
I'm really looking forward to seeinghow things go with this.
Peace be with you and Blessed be
They really are a loving and
They really are a loving and supportive family. It is pretty easy to see the interactions of all of them and get a feel for what their regular life is like without all this supernatural stuff. They are a pretty normal and boring family when it all comes down to it.
I think that's why I really kind of love them.
Heather
We are the change that will save the world.
I think that's why I really kind of love them.
Yep, I would label them a good people :)
-Elsbeth
Is fearr Gaeilge briste, ná Béarla clíste.
Broken Irish is better than clever English.
Simply put...
Maeko has a lot to learn, but she's smart, she'll adapt and overcome. Thanks Heather for finding time to continue K&K. Big (((Hugs))) Taarpa