Chapter 9
In a time and place where his wrongness would lead to him being stoned or burned unto his death, Ezekiel found a way to fulfil all of his duties as given to be him by God, and yet still be true to himself.
This is the story of Ezekiel's Victory.
In their flight from their home village, the family has stopped for a few days in a small abandoned house while they wait for a river to subside.
Chapter 9
The thunder roared and the rain poured from the sky as the storm battered in full force against the tiny house. Inside, the family erected a temporary screen using a blanket. Using water heated in a tin bucket over the fire, they took turns to retreat behind the screen and wash themselves in a small tub. Even Hope got a wash with Ezekiel and Charity working together to clean the wriggling child. They also fed Hope a small quantity of smooth mash they had prepared for her.
By the time everyone was clean, the stew was ready. The family stood around the table and gave thanks to God for blessing them with food and shelter. They sat and ate the stew and bread. While they ate, Samuel and Ezekiel described the ford and the likely delay before they could cross it. Isabelle and Charity described the visit by Prudence and Felicity, though they kept to themselves their feelings about Prudence's nature.
After they had finished eating, Samuel tapped the table with a thoughtful expression on his face.
"There is a question in my mind that has been troubling me," he said. "I am not sure if I fully understand what is happening with Constance. It was my understanding that Constance would put on the seeming of a man so that none would know that my son had sacrificed himself in place of Constance back at the village. As such, it was necessary for Constance to give the seeming of Ezekiel when we are before others. Yet here we are, alone in this house and unlikely to be disturbed, and still I see Ezekiel sitting before me."
Ezekiel nodded. "I understand your confusion, Father, for I am also confused. When we began our journey, I felt like Constance disguised as Ezekiel. But as our journey progressed, more and more I have felt like two people. I am both Constance and Ezekiel. I move between one and the other by the simple act of changing my clothes. It is a strangeness. In this instant, I am Ezekiel — your second son of that name, husband to Charity. At this instant, Constance is like a dream to me — a memory of another time and place. I am still Constance but I am changed, much like I changed when I went from maiden to married woman. I know I once was that Constance but I am no longer precisely the same. Tonight, I shall remove these clothes and don a nightgown. At that time I will be Constance again — widow of my brother Ezekiel and sister-wife of Charity. It will be that second Ezekiel who will then be the memory. I cannot explain it. God's path for me is a mystery."
Samuel grunted. "I must confess, I have enjoyed having a second son with me to work with and teach. My first son tried very hard but he was never …"
Samuel stopped and sighed. "But then, God opened my eyes and I know now that he was always Grace. She was a daughter trying so hard to be the son I never had. Yet nobody could doubt that she was born with the body of a man. God truly works in mysterious ways."
Samuel was silent for a moment, staring down at the table. But the family could see that he had not finished speaking so they waited quietly for him to continue.
"But with Constance, I never sensed any strangeness. As a child, and as a youth, she was always a girl. At least, she seemed so to me. But then, naturally I spent less time with Constance. Perhaps Isabelle saw something that I did not."
Samuel looked at Isabelle with the question in his eyes. Isabelle shook her head.
"I saw no strangeness in Constance. Ezekiel's strangeness was clear to all, though we knew not the reason for it. I also saw from an early age that Charity's path would be a difficult one. I must admit to being troubled by some aspects of the path Charity has begun to follow over the last few days, but I am not surprised to see her act so and I am pleased that she has finally begun to find joy in her life.
Isabelle smiled warmly at Charity, who returned the smile.
"But Constance reminded me very much of myself as a child, as a youth, and as a young married woman. I saw nothing that would suggest this change in Constance."
Ezekiel shrugged. "I felt nothing in myself. The best I can explain it is that until three days ago, I had never left the village and I was content where I was. But in the last few days I have seen so much more of the world and I am entranced by the breadth of God's creation. In the same way, I was content as maiden and then a married woman. But now I have learned that there is more within me — a breadth in my nature that I had never before suspected."
"I confess, I do not understand it, still," said Samuel. "It seems to go against all that I have known to be proper. But I concede Grace taught me that my knowledge of what is proper was incomplete. So I will not stand in the way of this second Ezekiel."
Ezekiel put his hand on the slight bulge in his belly. "There will come a time when I must put Ezekiel aside. The babe within me will grow too large to conceal. When that happens, I must show only Constance to the world for certainly a pregnant man would a be a strangeness none could ignore. For that reason, when we get further from our old home, and before we get too close to wherever we are likely to settle, I must put aside Ezekiel so that the people of our new village will only know Constance."
A look of sadness crossed Charity's face for she had come to like having this second Ezekiel with her, but she kept her silence on that matter.
Samuel grunted and nodded. "So be it."
There was quiet for a moment, and then Charity stirred.
"Father, there is another matter I would raise with you," said Charity.
Samuel grunted and nodded.
Charity started to speak, but then closed her mouth and looked nervously around the table.
Ezekiel, his hand hidden under the table, reached over and clasped Charity's hand. He smiled at her and nodded encouragement.
"I would have a child of mine own," said Charity.
Samuel shrugged, unimpressed. "It is the duty of a woman to bear children."
"Yes, it is!" replied Charity. "And it is the duty of a husband to lie with a woman that she may bear children. And when a husband dies, that duty falls on the man who takes her in."
Samuel frowned. "I do not follow!"
"I am the widow of Ezekiel. And before God and the creatures of the fields as witnesses, you took me into you house. Now I ask you to fulfil your duty as that man and lie with me that I may bear a child."
"But you are my daughter!" exclaimed Samuel. "It goes against God for a man to lie with his daughter!"
"Father, I ceased to be your daughter when you gave me to Ezekiel as wife. Now I am merely his widow and your daughter-in-law."
"Do you ask me to take you as a second-wife?"
"No, Father. I am content with my current status as the widow of one Ezekiel and the wife of another. I merely ask you to do your duty as my father-in-law who has taken me in after the death of your son. Lie with me that I may fulfil my duty as a woman and bear a child."
Samuel scowled. "These sound like weasel words. They are more worthy of a lawyer than one who has been taught as you have been taught. In the final judgement, God will not be interested in weasel words — only in what is in your heart. Speak your heart to me."
Charity looked down at the table for a moment to gather her thoughts. Then she lifted her head and looked directly at her father.
"On the night I wed to Ezekiel, I pledged I would bear him children that he may fulfil his duty as a son and give you children unto the next generation. Through my love for Ezekiel, I would honor that pledge."
Samuel grunted. "And to do so, you ask me to go against God and sleep with my daughter."
Charity sighed. "I ask you to recall the story of Lot. He escaped with his two daughters when God took retribution against the city of Sodom. His daughters, knowing they were the last of their tribe, lay with their father and got children from him that their tribe may continue. In a way, our flight from the village is similar to that of Lot. We are like the last of our tribe and I would get a child so that our tribe may continue."
"Our stories are not exactly the same," put in Ezekiel. "For we are fortunate our mother did not fall into the temptation to look back and so did not get turned into a pillar of salt."
"Fortunate indeed," replied Isabelle.
"But the story of Lot tells us that God is not completely opposed to the idea of a man lying with his daughters in particular circumstances," continued Ezekiel. "And, as you said to Noah, these are particular circumstances. I would lie with her myself if I could consummate our union. But I cannot and therefore I beseech you to do so."
Samuel stared at Charity, his face impassive but it was clear that he was thinking deeply behind that mask. Charity held her breath while she waited for a reply.
Samuel stood abruptly.
"It is late. Come, Isabelle, it is time we went to bed. I shall leave the two of you to bank the fire and so forth."
Samuel waited for Isabelle to stand and join him, then he picked up a lantern and escorted Isabelle into the back room and firmly closed the door behind him.
There was silence in the main room as Ezekiel and Charity absorbed the sudden end to the discussion.
Finally Ezekiel shrugged. "He did not say no! You may take some comfort from that."
"Perhaps I ask too much of Father," said Charity. "It does go against everything he has been taught."
"Perhaps. And perhaps you need only be patient so that he may decide in his own time."
Charity sighed and shook her head. They were quiet again for a time.
Ezekiel stood. "Here, help me unbind my dress and don a nightgown. We must feed Hope before we go to bed. Would you like to do once more that thing Mother showed us so you may feed Hope from your own breasts?"
Charity smiled. "Indeed! That would please me, greatly."
Charity held Hope to her breast and watched with large eyes as Hope suckled. She almost shuddered at the love she felt for this child who was becoming a daughter to her. The process of squeezing milk from Constance's breasts and feeding it to Hope at Charity's breasts took a lot longer than the normal way, but neither woman begrudged the extra time and effort. It was a joy to both of them and they shared the time with delight.
They fed Hope, changed her nappies and tucked her into bed. Then they banked the fire and climbed into bed themselves.
Charity embraced Constance and kissed her. Then she began tugging at her sister's nightgown.
"What are you doing?" asked Constance.
"I am taking this off of you, that is what I am doing," replied Charity.
"But then I would be entirely naked!" exclaimed Constance.
"Indeed! I would have you entirely naked. And when you are so, I shall also remove my nightgown and be entirely naked as well. Then we shall lie together beneath the blankets and embrace, for I would feel your skin against my skin."
Constance gasped. She blushed and ducked her head. But she did not resist Charity's efforts to remove her nightgown.
Shortly they nestled together beneath the blankets. They kissed again and then tenderly ran their hands over each other.
Constance gasped again, but this time in delight. "I never dreamed …" she whispered. "It feels so … Oh! Charity!"
"Now," whispered Charity. "Are you so certain you cannot consummate our union?"
Constance chuckled. "Quite certain."
"I am not convinced," said Charity. "Won't you at least make the effort? Perhaps God will be kind and grant us a small miracle."
Constance chuckled again. "Charity, my sweet sister-wife. Have you no end to your outrageousness? Why should God grant such a miracle?"
"Who are we to question God's will?" asked Charity. "If we do not make the attempt, we will not know if He has favored us. God expects His people to work. He expects the fisherman to throw their nets. He expects farmers to till their fields. If they do not work, He does not provide the miracle of food. In the same way, God expects a husband to lie with his wife and a wife to lie with her husband. If they do not, He does not provide the miracle of life. So lie with me, my husband. Lie with me the way a man should lie with his wife and perhaps God will reward us with a miracle."
Constance sighed. "Until this moment we have kissed and touched to show our tenderness and affection. I do not know what else we can do for despite all lofty words, we are both women."
"Kissing and touching seems like a good place to begin. Let us do that some more and then explore. Perhaps together we will discover new ways to show our tenderness and affection."
With that, Charity pulled Constance into her embrace and they kissed soundly. They went on to discover more that could be done when two women lay together. Their experimentation provoked new sensations and revealed the deep emotions within the couple. They spent the time together in wonder and delight.
God blessed them with strong feelings but He did not grant any miracles that night and their union did not result in Charity becoming with child. But it was not for want of any effort by either Charity or Constance.
In the meantime, within the back room, Samuel was lying on his back and staring sightlessly into the darkness above him. Isabelle lay on her side next to him and waited in silence.
Eventually, Samuel sighed and spoke.
"Well? What do you think I should do?"
"In this, I cannot direct you," replied Isabelle. "I will stand by you and support whatever you decide."
"I find myself having a crisis of … something. It is not a crisis of faith for God still holds His place in my heart. Perhaps, it is a crisis of learning. So much that I was taught now seems irrelevant. This began with Ezekiel. He showed me that there are other ways to fulfil our duties than the way that I was taught. Now I question everything."
"And yet, the first thing we are taught is to seek our own truth in the Bible," said Isabel. "We are not Papists who rely on what they hear from their priests for everything they know. We are Calvinists. As children, we listen to our elders and take their words without question for a child knows no better. But we are adults now. You are an elder in your own right! Listen to God and follow the path He sets out for you."
Samuel grunted. "I ask God for guidance and the only reply I hear is that God is watching me. If I sin, He will turn his eyes away from me. Surely it is a sin for a man to lie with his daughter."
"Yet Charity is no longer your daughter. She is a married woman — the widowed wife of your son. You took her in and gave her your protection. In the law of the land she is now your woman, not your daughter. There would be no sin in this."
Samuel grunted and stared upward in silence for a moment.
"In effect, she asks to be my second-wife, in everything but name. How do you feel about this?"
Isabelle was quiet for a time. Then she sighed.
"It is a source of great shame for me that I bore you so few children — and of those, only three survived to adulthood. A son and two daughters — and not a one of them following the path we might have expected for them. With the loss of Ezekiel, your direct line is ended. I have failed in my duty as a wife."
Samuel shook his head. "Do not speak so. I have not the words to express my pride in Ezekiel. His sacrifice exceeded all expectations for a son to his father and for a brother to his sisters. If my line is to end with him then I am content. Ezekiel has surely won the greatest victory for I am certain he stands now beside God in heaven and no man could ask for more from his son. I will not hear you talk of shame in the same sentence as you speak of Ezekiel."
"Nevertheless," replied Isabelle. "I still feel great shame for my failure. You asked how I felt and I answered. Charity offers a way to continue your direct line into the next generation. A night away from your bed is a small price for me to pay to be redeemed from that failure."
Samuel swallowed a chuckle. "You and I both know that it will take more than one night before we can be sure she has taken with child. And I see Charity's heart very clearly. She will not settle for one child. If I agree to one, she will come back asking for more. And where Charity leads, Constance will follow. It is in both their natures to act thus. They will not be satisfied until we cannot cross the floor of our house without wading hip-deep through younglings."
Isabelle knew the truth of this and made no attempt to deny his words.
"So, in everything but name, you will have not one, but two junior wives to wrangle," said Samuel. "I recall when Joshua took his brother's widow as his second wife, there was much turmoil in his house. It was several years before they learned to live together without breaking out into fights the whole village could hear. Is such disharmony such a small price for you?"
Isabelle shook her head. "We already know each other very well. We know we can live together in harmony. There will be no turmoil in our house. There will not be such jealousy as Joshua had to contend with. For Charity and Constance, you will be a stallion that they go to for stud duties. I think they will not demand more of your heart than they already hold. For the most part, I think they will be content with each other."
Samuel snorted. "Now I am to be nothing more than a stallion in the fields put out to stud?"
"Indeed! And that is not a small thing for God's creatures do His will without argument or complaint. I would gladly share my stallion with my daughters. There will be no turmoil in our house because of that."
Isabelle stopped to think for a moment.
"I will not deny that with three women living in one house there may be occasional arguments. But we will not shame you by broadcasting our disagreements to the entire village the way Joshua's wives did."
"We could build a second house for Charity and Constance and their younglings," suggested Samuel.
"I will not hear of it," replied Isabelle. "How would you care for them and protect them when they live in a different house? No man can live in two houses. No! One house will suffice. I shall joyfully wade hip-deep through the younglings. And then, should we survive long enough, they may care for us in our infirmity while we preside as elders over the weddings of our grandchildren. That would be a great joy to me."
"All of this presupposes that I agree to Charity's request. God must surely be laughing at me in this moment."
"And why would God laugh at you?"
"As little as a week ago, I sat with the elders of our village. In my pride — in my hubris — I thought I knew God's path for me. I would grow old in that place and I would draw on my wisdom and experience to guide those younger than me that they would know God as I did. Then Symeon was killed and Constance accused of his murder. Then Ezekiel … Then Ezekiel showed me that all of my wisdom and experience was built, not on stone but on sand. Now my world is upended and I grope blindly for a firm place to set my feet. Surely God is laughing at my hubris."
Isabelle rolled over and put her arms around Samuel. Samuel shifted to his side with his back to her.
"Enough talking! It is time for sleep" said Samuel. "Say nothing to our daughters, for I do not know my mind on this matter."
Isabelle kept her arms around Samuel and embraced him tightly. She laid her head on the pillow behind her husband and closed her eyes.
Samuel's eyes remained open and staring into the darkness for much of the night.
Comments
BB Ezekiel's Story for new generation
BB, yes the voice of the prophet is different from the priest though both seek to be faithful to God. Charity's application of Lot's story is compelling. Samuel knows the request is not likely to stop with one child or one daughter. The love and Charity and Constance may strangely limit their relationship with their father. O what a net you cast.
Hugs, JessieC
Jessica E. Connors
Jessica Connors
Priests
My references to Papists is an attempt to be historically accurate (at least a little bit). No disrespect is intended to Catholics. Attitudes of the time between Catholics and Protestants were distinctly less cordial than they are today. Even the ordinary folks spoke of the other group with contempt (and sometimes fear) and the Puritans were extremist Protestants. I can't assume that the readers of my story would all be familiar with that attitude so I needed to reference it somehow. Otherwise some people may have wondered why Samuel is so able to question and sometimes reject what he has been taught by his elders. Such an attitude would not have been tolerated at all in either the Catholic Church or many parts of the Protestant Church.
As to the relationships between the family, all I will say is that the story is called "Ezekiel's Victory" and I never intended that victory to refer only to the saving of Constance's life which occurs fairly early on in the story. At a deeper level, Ezekiel is still winning his victory.
Cheers,
BB
"Surely God is laughing at my hubris."
Giggle. Well, at least he's trying to learn.
Ezekiel's Victory - Chapter 9
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lot_%28biblical_person%29 Do the girls was such children?
May Your Light Forever Shine
The Children of Lot
The two sons that came from the union between Lot and his daughters were Moab (father of the Moabites) and Ben-Ammi (father of the Ammonites). Both the Moabites and the Ammonites became powerful and important tribes in the history of the Israelites. Indeed Moab was an ancestor of Jesus of Nazareth. Throughout the Bible, Lot is referred to with reverence as being a man of God.
Please, don't get too caught up with later scholarly analysis which wasn't available to Charity or Constance. They have a less sophisticated view of the world and a less sophisticated understanding of the Bible. From their point of view, they see no problem with Moab or Ben-Ammi.
As per a private discussion with another reader, the individuals within this family are seeking a personal understanding of the Bible. Like all of us, they are flawed and make mistakes. For example, they have fallen into the all too human trap of using Scripture selectively to support their own arguments.
Thanks for taking the time to read and comment on my story.
BB