Attack of the Beast
by Anon Allsop
Part 5

Chapter 15

When I awoke, Park was gone. I felt a mix of emotions as I searched the house for him, realizing that he most likely was already on one of the hundreds of transport ships. A great wave of sadness washed over me, knowing that I would be alone for a long, long time. Then I felt anger, anger for him leaving and not saying goodbye.

I trembled as the fear of the unknown kept invading my mind, and a long shuddering sigh escaped my lips. I swallowed and gently wiped a tear away, a tear... for Park. I knew why he slipped away while I slumbered, his uncomfortable fear of leaving me behind... trying to say goodbye was bad enough last night, what would it have been like this morning?

Gathering myself up, I began my day as many of the other wives would be doing as well. I had a house to care for, and I owed that much to Park. I slowly began to move about the rooms, each chore occupying my mind and taking it away from thinking of him. There would be plenty of time to dwell on those thoughts of him... plenty of time.

Chapter 16

Each day from that one forward, marched along ceaselessly. I enrolled in unnecessary classes to teach me 'how to speak', even though I knew how forward and backward. I would laugh when they complemented me at how wonderful I was able to grasp a strange language, leaving them to assume eventually that my 'memory' was finally kicking in from when I was a little girl.

Often, I would be standing in a store staring at an item of clothing that was hanging and ask myself 'Why?' Those answers never came; each item of clothing had now become a necessity for me, something that every woman my age purchased. It was never easy for me to push aside the feeling that I was a male, trying to masquerade as a female, yet outwardly I was no different than the girl next to me. Perhaps our only difference being that she had a whole lifetime to become used to the strange clothing and the way she was treated in her daily life.

Gradually, like tiny steps, I would embrace the change one small item at a time. I stood before a rack of women's underwear, panties as they were called. Hesitantly, as if it were a wild animal I touched one. Finally laughing at myself I shrugged; didn't all women wear these strange garments? Wasn't I a woman now? I fingered the silken material, unsure if I should purchase such a feminine garment.

I steeled my nerves, picked up several pair and headed toward the front to pay. Like the turmoil my mind felt about the changes I was encountering, one by one my walls against femininity fell, clothing, bras, make-up, everything. It was as though I was released to become what my destiny had chosen for me.

I sat before a mirror and studied myself on one such occasion... studied my feminine self for almost an hour before hesitantly picking up the small stick lying before me. With a deep breath, I began to apply the female accents to my face as did all of the women I had seen. What was that ancient saying...when in Rome?

It took me months of practice before I left the house fully made up... all times before were completely and entirely without any at all. It was Carmen who finally got me to take that first step when she did it to me as a demonstration... then after that, it had always been accomplished by my own hand. Carmen too had talked me into allowing my nails to grow slightly longer, saying that the rounded ovals at the end of my fingers would look very pretty on such slender fingers. I shrugged…”When in Rome” I would sigh to myself.

It was because I dared myself that I first put polish on my nails, strange as it may seem…somewhere deep inside of me I actually felt pretty when I wore it. I would enjoy how the glossy surfaces would catch the light as I would move my hand around. The last huge step in my transformation came when I sat looking in the mirror at myself.

Sighing deeply I frowned; the shorter ‘feminine’ hairstyle I wore refused to cooperate with the brush in my hand. I gently laid it beside me on the table and gathered up what I could in my hand, holding it in a bunch behind my head. Slowly I turned my head from side to side, wondering how I would look with a style more like those of the other women in our colony. “Other women?” I sighed, realizing that more and more I was allowing myself to accept that label.

I pushed it from my mind and continued on; marching forward in my strange odyssey toward a life I would have never purposefully chosen for myself. I frowned, picked up a hair tie and quickly looped it around the small bundle of my hair. I made a decision that day to let it continue to grow, a simple decision for me that was like a metamorphosis within my own mind. I removed the hair band, parted it down the middle and smiled as it fell just over my ears and onto my shoulders. I then parted it to the side and watched it completely cover one whole side of my head.

With finality I brushed the mop out smooth and smiled at myself in the mirror, somewhere deep inside of my body was a girl pushing her way to the surface, somewhat like a beautiful butterfly stretching its wings for the first time.

I knew that the changes in my appearance were only a small step for me to overcome; like an onion, one by one I would peel away at the thin covering that layered me. The journey would be long, yet I was in this for the long haul... the rest of my life to be exact.

For me, to embrace my body was to accept destiny. Maybe by accepting what I had become, I could embrace the life lying before me with certainty. I realized that the easiest steps were those that I was encountering; it took no great skill to purchase clothing or place coloring upon my thin face. No, those were only small steps to be taken, of which, I knew that the greater steps would be yet to come.

Some days I found myself standing in a torrent of emotions, not sure if what I was feeling would be classified as either male or female...still there was a miniscule part of me that remained, a small piece of the old Christian that refused to give up. For now, I would let him survive in this strange world of mine, a world surrounded in colors or scents that only a woman should posses, a world that was ruled by men, of which I no longer had a grasp of that realm. Forever being forced into the role of the helpless female, I frowned as I would see her reflection in the mirror. I can be a woman, I had no choice. Yet, I would never be helpless! There was plenty of room out there for a woman who knew her way in the world, a woman who was strong and independent. A woman, perhaps like I would become.

Chapter 17

A constant little niggling in my mind prompted me to ask the doctor when we next had our meeting, as was customary since returning to the planet. I had grown fearful with whatever reaction my body had to the beast’s virus…could I infect another person? Could I pass this on to a future child…to Park?

Relying on my medical background, I began to prod the good doctor for assurances of my ‘clean bill of health’; hopefully between the two of us, I could feel a relative sense of security from passing any infection from the planet on to others.

I sat in a sterile gown on the padded bench as the doctor finished a battery of tests she had performed on me. “I see nothing for you to fear, Christian. Everything checks out perfectly fine for a young woman of 24.”

I nodded thankfully, “I don’t know why I’ve been so worried?”

“It’s probably just your biological clock reminding you that you aren’t getting any younger.” She smiled and sat down on a small stool. “Computer?” She spoke, looking toward the ceiling. “Computer, please search for biological anomalies on subject 121145.”

The voice came from nowhere…and yet all around us, encompassing the both of us in totality. “Subject 121145 is clear of all biological anomalies…system performing at optimum levels withstanding onset of pre-menses. Menses begins in 31 hours, 16 minutes, 21 seconds.”

“Were you aware…” She began but I nodded and looked away slightly from embarrassment.

“I know.” I sighed, “I don’t need to be reminded.” I looked at her for several seconds, “That time the computer said…is it that accurate?”

She laughed, “It is only an approximation…an educated guess if you will.”

“I find it creepy.” I replied as I stood up and removed the medical gown and began to pull on my clothing.

“Christian, I find it remarkable how well you learned our language. Your aptitude is off the charts according to the staff you have been working with.” She smiled and rolled her stool to the wall, then turned to face me. “Have you given any thought to what you’re going to do after Park returns?”

I shrugged, as I worked my foot into the shoe I had been wearing. “Not really…I suppose that I’ll find some menial job to occupy my time.”

“I’d like you to consider a sort of extension program that we’re starting here in the medical unit of the colony.” She folded her arms and leaned against the wall, “I think you could have a very successful career in the medical field if you really wanted it.”

I thought about it giving me something to do; I had already completed several courses prior to my change and repeating them would just reinforce what I had learned. While it wouldn’t be furthering my military career…it would be in the same sort of general area of interest as I had once before. “Sure, if you think I could do it…I’d like to try.”

“Good. Good, I’ll get you the classes to ‘test out’ of general studies because I really think that those would be beyond you and I’ll sponsor you to get the ball rolling…look forward to hearing from me sometime in the next two weeks.” She spoke as she was walking me toward the front of the facility.

“Thanks Doc, I appreciate all you’ve done…and are doing for me!”

She smiled, “I like you Christian, I want to see you succeed; having another friendly face around the medical facility would be extremely beneficial indeed.”

I paused and gave her a quick smile, “Thanks again Doc!”

I returned to my craft, climbed into the seat, slowly programmed the way home. I rode along in comparative silence and contemplated a new career in medicine; was it really something I wanted to do. I pondered it over and decided that it was, it was a way that I could give back to my colony…Park would approve and that was all that really mattered to me.

Later that day, I received a package from Park; in it was a beautiful, shimmering sleeping silk that felt like it was made of the lightest material. It was the first real package beyond a couple of letters that I had gotten from him to date; I had sent him about one about every other day. I knew from my former life, that a soldier enjoys nothing greater than word from home, well that and the company of his girl. I felt my face grow warm as I brought my mind back to the package, pushing the strange images away as quickly as they had surfaced.

The pretty item had long straps that would caress the wearer's shoulder hung from the top. The pale yellow garment slid through my fingers like air through the bountiful trees that lined our street. I held it to my face and cried; somewhere deep inside of me I missed his company greatly.

Was it his company as I thought, or something more, considering what thoughts had just coursed through my mind? I was afraid to find out, afraid of what my own answer would be if push came to shove. Again I glanced down at such a sexual laced item; I could feel the arousal flowing toward the surface as I quickly glanced around the empty room, alone but for me and the fish.

With a sigh, I gently folded the item and placed it carefully into my dresser, perhaps someday I would wear it, but not now, I wasn't ready. I returned to the box, in its bottom was a short letter. I lifted it to my tear-filled eyes and read; the words were blurry and distorted from my crying.

Hey Christian, hope this letter finds you well. The fighting is pretty bad around here, but we're making out okay. They don't give us much time to write anything; sorry I haven't been any better at responding to all of yours. Keep them coming though, it’s great to hear news of any kind from home. I've even let the guys read some of them, hope you don't mind — so keep them clean.

We think, with luck that we'll be sent home at the end of the year. Cross your fingers and say a prayer for that to happen. Oh, by the way, Roger was shot yesterday, he'll live. (damn) We're going to be moving soon so I have to end this... take care of yourself!

Love, Parker.

I found myself raising it to my lips, giving it a soft kiss, and somehow... strangely wishing it was him instead. I folded it and pushed it deep into my pocket, made my way to the desk and began to write another mindless letter to him.

Chapter 18

The weeks began to drone on and on, and I slowly gave up hope for Parker to ever return home as he promised. I knew of war before; I had once been a soldier, although from this perspective it was quite different. Even though I groused about our being separated, I knew that there were thousands in the colony who had to deal with the same longing and anguish; why should I be any different.

It seemed that for each time that he was scheduled to come home, the fighting would escalate and they would keep his unit even longer. Weeks continued to pile one onto another; it had been almost two years since my change, eighteen months since I had last spoken with him. I was able to 'graduate' from my classes as 'miraculously', the language became a barrier no longer; starting my medical courses without much interval in-between.

My truly real battle was yet to begin, somehow for me; I had to fit into this life of being Parker's wife and make it look convincing. I had to make my transition as smoothly as possible to avoid attention to either Park or myself, yet continue on as any other wife would during her husband’s absence.

It was still strange, for not only did I need to come closer and accept my fate; I found it was imperative to do so just to fit in. Upon my new friend Carmen's suggestion, I began to become involved with an organization that had been created to help the wives of soldiers. She thought it would help me to assimilate into society faster, if I had a common cause that would relate with other women of our community. Summoning up all of my courage, I knew she was right as I entered the meeting room for the first time.

For the first few weeks of attending, I sat quietly in the back and tried not to draw attention. Then, I gradually moved further toward the women who were seated in a great circle so I could better hear them. During that time, I wanted to interject a comment or question, yet hesitated to do so because I wanted to stay hidden and not be noticed. However, a topic finally swung around that all of the women had been discussing. I knew that I could help; so, ever so slowly; almost hesitantly I raised my hand.

They had been talking about some military terminology that puzzled a few of the women; the answer they had been given while close, it wasn’t technically accurate. Being a former soldier, I thought I could answer their questions and calm their fears. I began to tackle each question one at a time; before I had finished, they were all facing my chair in rapt attention. Finally our moderator, Mrs. Cunningham smiled.

"Apparently, you HAVE found something that interests you, Christian! But such a strange subject to be so proficient in..." She laughed and nodded to the others, "Seems Christian is a wealth of knowledge that we've just tapped into!"

All of them were well aware that I had been found on a planet and was brought back here by Parker. I felt they also were aware that our marriage was more for keeping me in a home than as a wife, but I hoped that I was wrong and they would fail to see through my ruse.

"It's not that much knowledge, ever since my classes have finished, all I have been doing is reading." A few of them smiled, so I continued. "All Parker has to read in his... our home, are military books and magazines or the medical books that go with my own studies." One older woman smiled and nodded in agreement.

Another young woman around my age laughed, "Feel lucky, honey, if that's the only reading material that he's got around the house." Others giggled and snickered at her comment.

I shrugged, "That's all I can find." Again a few of them laughed softly.

"No girly magazines or erotic books?" The moderator asked, sounding somewhat surprised. "Then you better hang onto him, he's a keeper!"

A few laughed and then all seemed to break into a banter with each other, which reminded me of the peeping of several of the birds that flock among you in the parks as each one was vying for a scrap of food. There were about ten simultaneous conversations going at the same time, and the din of their noise made me laugh to myself. I realized then that they had accepted me as one of their own, and I fell into a comfortable conversation with a woman to my immediate left who had a young infant nursing at her breast.

"How old is your baby?" I asked, realizing that seeing her exposed breast was creating no arousal in my body. I knew then, that I could probably be sitting among these women, each entirely naked and feel nothing as I would have in my former male body. The Beast’s bite had run its course, it seemed I was now mentally and physically a woman.

"Three months next Tuesday." She smiled and pulled her blouse lightly away for me to better view her child as it nursed away. "Do you have any?"

"Any? Oh, children... no, no I don’t have any children yet." I smiled and touched my slender finger to the infant’s rosy cheek, its constant sucking made the tiny muscles in its temple to flex and move. "Boy or girl?"

"A girl, her name is Amber." She brushed her hair aside, "She wasn't blessed with much hair, and I guess she takes after me." She giggled, "I was bald until I was almost a year old."

"She's beautiful." I said smiling, as the child let go of her mother's teat. The woman pulled down her shirt and began to burp her daughter. After a series of pats a loud burp came from the tiny girl's mouth causing all the women around us to laugh.

"I bet that makes her feel better!" One woman laughed, "I know it would make me feel better!" Again others laughed, I smiled and giggled softly with them.

Something inside of me was begging to hold the little baby, and deep down I wished she was my own. I smiled and reached out to touch the soft arms and ran my hand over her delicate fingers as reverently as had her mother. "Would you like to hold her?" She asked, seeing that I was interested.

I couldn't believe what I had just heard; it was almost as though she was inside my head! "Really? May I?" I asked softly.

The woman smiled, "Amber, would you like to be held by my friend?" The little child had a bubble dance along her lip as her mother handed her over. "My name is Carol Rowe."

"Christian... Christian Sherman." I said as I held the beautiful little girl in my slender arms. "She's so small!" I whispered softly.

"God makes them that way." She said laughing, "It helps having them little like that when they’re born."

I felt my face grow warm as I held her daughter who began to briskly rub her little face into my neck. "She must be getting sleepy." I said, smiling.

"Probably, she usually gets that way just after she has eaten." Carol smiled as I gently rocked her little one in my arms. "She looks good on you."

"Pardon me?" I smiled, for my emotions were at a high. I could smell the soft fragrances of her baby lotion and powders mixing in a strange and heavenly scent! I felt as though I was being pulled toward the little one as a moth to a flame.

"You should have a child; I have a feeling that you would be a wonderful mother!" I felt my heart jump at her comment, so I smiled and gave the infant a tender squeeze.

"You're a natural." She said watching me.

"A mother in the making, she is!" One older woman observed.

"You really think so?" I asked as I reluctantly handed back the darling little girl to her mother, clearly certain that I was unable to imagine a young baby nursing from my own breast.

"I know so." Carol answered smiling, "You'll have your own soon enough."

I smiled, yet I unable to remove my eyes from the infant. Deep within me, a yearning was building, a yearning that I couldn't ever begin to fathom even weeks ago.

After the meeting was over, I loitered near Carol, watching her prepare her child for going outside. I couldn't resist the urge to kneel next to her pram and stroke her soft skin.

I knew then that something had happened to me in that room, something that occurred to every woman since time had begun. I bent down and tenderly kissed the baby's forehead. Then as I stood up I thanked Carol for allowing me to hold her daughter.

As everyone stepped outside in the bright sunshine, I ventured down the sidewalk and started off in the direction of my home. My mind... my feminine mind, raced with an overload of maternal instincts that I didn't realize I had possessed.

The sidewalk was dappled with sunlight, only broken by the shadows created by the tall trees overhead. I found myself humming a song from my childhood as I strolled slowly along, my voice was soft and feminine, sounding more like my mother’s than what I had known for most of my young life.

My mind’s eye pictured Park and I walking down this very sidewalk and before us was a pram with our lovely daughter sleeping contently inside it. I paused near one of the tall trees that lined the walk, and smiling, I glanced across the street at two children playing in the park.

Looking inward at myself, I wondered what had changed in me. Did I not eat and breathe in the same fashion as I always had? I touched my flat stomach, and then let my hand gently smooth over the flair of my feminine hips. Again I smiled, feeling the undergarment that firmly held my form; it felt only natural to wear these clothes, as if I had been wearing them all my life.

I folded my arms, suddenly feeling chilly as a soft breeze wafted across my arms, gently lifting several stray locks of hair as if by an unseen hand. Gooseflesh prickled at my skin; beneath the blouse I wore a satin bra, just like thousands of other women wore. I concentrated on its fit, gently hugging my ribs, pulling slightly at my shoulders...and yet, feeling comfortable and as natural as wearing an undershirt prior to my change.

Somehow, my mind had been unlocked that day, opening a door to the female inside of me. I smiled and turned, resuming my walk toward home, in the warm sunlight. I thought back to the little girl that I held in my arms, how I felt as I relished her soft form in my protective grasp. I knew now what people meant when they spoke of that elusive 'maternal instinct' that women are born with. Only with me, it had taken a young child in my arms to somehow unlock its secret.

From that day forward I started to pay attention to how I would react, how my emotions were affected by simple things around me. It was as though an epiphany had happened to me; I knew however, that I only had just become aware of my actions, movements and gestures only recently.

I could feel the slight swing of my hips as I would stroll along a sidewalk, each step creating a miniscule bounce from my gently confined breasts. Simple things as pointing were done as naturally feminine as any 'real' woman. Often, I would pause in mid movement, and realize just how female that move actually was.

Over time I just ignored the oddness of it all, and accepted it as part of me, part of what I have become, and part of my life. I knew then too, what I had become... moved me physically closer to what I perceived a wife would be. That unnamed something was drawing me closer to becoming Park's wife; making it easier to accept the duties which were entrusted to me, duties that helped me grow further in the roll of Mrs. Parker Sherman.

Chapter 19

It was a few days later that I heard Roger had been hit for a second time and was in very bad shape, the doctor who spoke to me said that they were bringing him back on the next craft which would arrive sometime later today. Deep inside, I felt sorry for him and hoped that if he were able, he could give me news of Parker. I hurried to finish my work around the house and while I sat idle, contemplated going down to meet with the transport ambulance, bringing him home.

At the allotted time, I found myself waiting at the craft's pad, standing alone when it arrived. As they rolled Roger toward one of the smaller, ambulance craft, I fell in beside it. Roger's tired gaze locked upon mine. A slight tear rolled out from the corner of his eyes, as I took his hand and gave it a slight squeeze. He held my fingers; tears fell softly onto his cheeks the entire way up the ambulance craft's ramp. A strange machine at the foot of his bed did all his breathing for him; the constant clicking would have been maddening for me. I kept pace with the gurney, a great sadness pulling me along with the man who was my husbands sworn enemy.

He was unable to talk because he had an apparatus attached to his mouth to aid in breathing. I climbed inside with him and gave Roger a motherly smile; I let him hold my hand as the craft hovered along the ground and left the air pad for the medical building. His eyes continued to weakly watch me, I could only smile and tell him that everything would be okay as he was wheeled into the hospital.

At the doors, they refused my entry, saying only family would be permitted beyond this point. I stood at the little glass portals and watched as he was turned around a corner and rolled out of view.

Knowing what I knew about severe injury, I knew that Roger was in a grave condition, and I felt that there was no hope for his survival. I believe he knew it from how he had gradually resigned himself to death with every bit of honor that he could muster.

I finally had enough of their preventing me from his room; I slipped into his room in the very last few days of his life, telling the attending doctors that I was his sister. Whether they knew or not I didn’t care, he was dying and alone and needed someone to be with him.
When our eyes met, I could almost sense a relief in them, even in a man who is destined himself to succumb to his injury. He seemed to be relieved that he wasn't being left alone to die.

I kept imagining that it were Parker laying in the bed, that is why I remained by this poor soul’s side, I hoped that if something were to happen to Park, another young female would hold his dying hand. I swallowed and blew out softly the trembling emotion that stuck in my throat, this man thankfully wasn’t Park, but beside him, until the end came, I would remain.
No one deserved to die alone, not even Roger.

When he neared death's door, I held his trembling hand. His tears were slowly rolling down into his ears; we both knew that his death was approaching. I bent down, still holding his hand and whispered, "Would you like for me to pray with you?"

He said nothing, just a weak squeeze of my hand was the only signal I had been given. I lowered my head and prayed aloud, his eyes closed, pushing a desperate tear away. He quietly died two days later. Not one word did he ever speak to me, his death was shrouded in an eerie silence. He was a fallen soldier, I would treat him with the full respect, dignity and honor that I could provide this fighting man.

I could never really fathom why he had it in for Parker, although I knew the stories. I guess that was between them, after today I too would consider them moot. During the time I had devoted myself to his last days, I feel that we finally were able to make our peace with each other. No person should ever have to be alone, in the shape he had been in; he should have been surrounded by family. In a way, I was that family. I felt honored that I could be there for him at the end, almost like a real sister. It saddened me that he was never able to say so, but I think he felt that way as well.

I was the only person to show up at his funeral, and cried softly for him as he was laid to rest on that rainy afternoon, and my tears were genuine and honest for a man whom I barely knew. I stood under my umbrella weeping in the storm, beside the grave as he was being lowered into the ground.

My heart was torn asunder as far off in the distance the woeful tune of the ancient ‘Taps’ began to echo in the dreary rain. A mournful tune carried to the colony from our days as a warring nation on long ago ‘Earth’. When I glanced up after drying my eyes, a man in his splendid dress uniform approached, carrying something in his hand.

He lowered his head and placed our colony’s flag in my hands. He spoke softly to me as I stood there, He began..." This flag is presented on behalf of a grateful nation...” and ended with, “I am very sorry for your loss, ma'am."

He spoke softly, as the rain beat against his hat and dress coat. I really don't remember much of what the man said as he stood before me, but I respectfully nodded slowly, as he gave the flag a salute, slowly turned and repeated the gesture to the grave of the soldier; spun and walked away.

I felt my heart sink as fast as the rain fell, all the while wondering what I would do if it were Parker lying in the cold grave. I shuddered at the thought and pushed the tears from my eyes; this wasn't Park, and I had to keep reminding myself of that fact. With a deep emotional sigh, I whispered aloud, "God go with you, Roger." Slowly I walked back, sheltered under my umbrella, toward my personal craft.

Chapter 20

From the news we were receiving, they reported that the fighting was getting very intense around the enemy's capital with each day that passed, and more and more of our men were coming home injured, dead... or not at all. I had been crying for three days straight, worried for Park's safety, when I found myself at the gates of the local colony 'nondenominational' church in a driving rainstorm. A thin kindly man with white hair invited me inside the church, and out of the storm.

I hesitated, even I knew that religion was almost an ancient and dying practice…but something in me knew that up until a short while ago, I would have never had believed that my destiny would have changed as a result of visiting that planet and my encounter with a strange beast!

I slowly approached him and stood at the bottom of the steps, finally deciding that somewhere deep within me I had to believe in something bigger than the world I was in. The thin pastor reached out to me and offered his hand; he met a determined woman as I approached him.

He smiled, and ushered me inside, I sat down in the very last pew in the back. The entire service was lovely and it made me feel welcome and as if there was someone else in control of my life, other than myself. As the service ended, I walked out onto the wet sidewalk, and just at the very moment the sunlight broke through the canopy of clouds. It was to me, as if a sign came from a higher power, telling me to release my fears and it will take them away... better things were yet to come! I embraced that thought as I turned my steps toward our home.

I inhaled deeply, my suddenly rejuvenated steps falling quickly toward home. I needed the solace I found in that little church, and needed it desperately after what had happened to Roger began playing over and over in my mind, creating and building fear of the dangers that Park may be facing at that exact moment.

Over the next few weeks, I submerged myself deeper and deeper into my medical studies as well as that church, going as far as joining a woman's group that met on Wednesdays. Imagine my surprise when I saw Carmen belonged to the same group as well. It finally gave me someone to talk with whom I actually knew; someone who shared my fears and concerns.

I found out through those meetings, that Carmen's boyfriend was stationed somewhere on that same planet with my Parker.

"Perhaps they might know each other?" she wondered.

"Wouldn't that be something?" I sighed, as we walked home after one of our meetings.

"It's too bad you and your husband didn't have much of a honeymoon, before he left!" She frowned, and then smiled. "I know what I'd do when he returned, though!"

"Oh?" I smiled at her. "And what would you do, if you were me?" I kidded.

Her face reddened, "I'd make sure he didn't leave the bedroom, that's for sure."

Now it was my turn to become embarrassed. "Maybe he won't want to be intimate... after all this war is over." I knew how battle can change a man, but I didn’t tell that to my friend.

She nodded, "I guess it could happen, but I'd do my best to make him forget the war as quickly as possible! It is what I plan on doing."

I sighed, "I don't know..."

She smiled and playfully bumped me with her hip, "Oh, I know what’s got you all worried?"

"You do?" I wondered aloud.

"Sure, you're afraid that you'd get pregnant too soon and maybe you aren't ready for that to happen just yet." Carmen teased. "Are you afraid to mess up that wonderful figure of yours?"

I shrugged, "I'm pretty sure that Park wants a big family, but you are right about my not being sure if I want to give in to him."

"You're kidding, right?" She paused. "You married the guy didn't you? Surely, you have to want to give him what he's looking for from his wife?"

"That's the thing, Carmen. I love him... and I want to do what is right for him..."

"I don't understand, you just have to lie on your back and let him do his thing. Nature will do the rest." She laughed softly as my face grew red.

"I don't know the first thing about being a wife!" I sighed, “I have absolutely no experience of being the woman he wants.

"What young woman does?" She replied. "When you go with what makes you both feel right, the rest will come along soon enough."

"The rest…?" I wondered.

"Oral sex, orgasms... babies." She laughed.

I inhaled deeply, rolling my eyes. "I'm not sure I can do all of that!"

Again she laughed, "You'll do what needs to be done, that's the way it's been for thousands of years!" She reached over and patted my stomach, "A year from now, I'll be betting that this is big and round." She laughed, "Your homecoming will be one for the books!"

I smiled and shot her a quick glance, "I don't know... I wouldn't be too sure about that!"

She again laughed, "I would."