Notice: This is a fan fiction of based upon the stories in Lilith Langtree’s “Comics RetCon Universe”. The story is mine, but some of the characters are not. Mystique from Marvel Comics’ X-men are trademarks of Marvel Comics. All rights reserved. The Riddler, Joker and Green Arrow are trademarks of DC Comics. All rights reserved. To the best of my knowledge, all the other characters are fiction. Any resemblance to a living, dead or undead person is completely random.

Sorry about the super long delay and the cliffhanger in the last chapter added with the extra long delay. My Whisper revisions and the new parts of that story are taking a lot more work than I expected. Lesson learned, only do one story at a time. Since Whisper is my main focus right now, I am not sure how long it will take to get the next chapter in this story done. I will get this story done though, honest. :) A special thanks goes out to all of the CRU authors for providing such an interesting Universe to play in. Hope ya all enjoy.  Thanks to djkauf for editing.

Jenny leans forward as I pause to take another sip of wine.  “So, did you blast him?”

I frown at the memory of how helpless I felt. “Nope. I couldn’t. I didn’t have any essence.”

“What!? How could you be out of essence? Didn’t you drink some water?”

I glance at her and smile. “Umm, Jen.  You do know that DBO is just a game, right? I mean, if you could really get essence from just drinking some water or get healed by just eating some food, wouldn’t everyone be able to cast spells and why would we need hospitals?”

She blushes. “Oh, yeah.  Now that you mention it, it does seem kinda silly.  So, how did you get enough essence to portal home tonight?”

I look at her curiously.  I know that she has seen me play, but she was never the slightest bit interested in how the game worked.  She hated it enough to dump me.  So, I don’t understand why she seems to know more about DBO now.

“Well, you did portal home, right?” Jen asks, expectantly,as she ignores my puzzled expression.

I simply nod while thinking about the best way to tell the rest of my story to her.

“Okay, then why didn’t you have any essence when he attacked you?” Jenny looks so impatient.

I simply smile at her.  “Do you want me to tell you now or do you want to wait for that part of the story?”

Jen raises her hands in frustration. “Are you crazy!? Of course I want you to tell me! Nooowww!”

I take another sip of wine and look at her with a smirk.

“You’re going to make me wait, aren’t you?” She asks, defeated.

I just nod and smile at her.

“Brat!” She sighs and settles back to wait for me to continue.
 

**

I have no idea how I was able to remain so calm.  I was about to get stabbed by some nut job with a knife and I just stood there. I tried to visualize myself casting Vylencia’s shield spell, but nothing happened.  Well, not nothing.  I thought that I felt something, but since a shield didn’t pop up to protect me; I couldn’t be sure.  I somehow knew that Religious_Zealot_01 was at full health, but he was also less than me,  much less. Like maybe he was lower level. He also didn’t have any essence and that he couldn’t have essence.  It was like his Religious Zealot class couldn’t use essence. That realization shocked me to the core as I realized that I didn’t have any essence either, but that I could have it. I didn’t see any floating things over my head or his head that displayed all of this like it does in DBO. Instead, it was more of a feeling of some sort.  I just knew.

What a time to be OOE!

All of those epiphanies happened during his lunge toward me, but I didn’t really have time to think about what it all meant.

I watched as the knife started to descend toward me in a gleaming arc.  All of my attention was focused on that knife, so I was very surprised when his knife hand suddenly spasmed uncontrollably as he somehow lost control over his body.  Did I somehow manage to cast a spell or fear him without any essence?  

Instead of him plunging his knife into me, his out of control body bumped into me and knocked me to my butt. I scrambled backwards across the floor as I heard a rapid clicking and crackling sound followed by the smell of ozone. I looked back to see Religious_Zealot_01 convulsing in frustrated agony.  Looking past him, I saw the two most heroic looking hospital security guards that I have ever seen holding tasers in their hands.  Their tasers had wires extending from them and into the back of the flopping like a fish, Religious_Zealot_01.  The electrical discharges stopped, but the nut tried to use that reprieve to reach me.  Once again, he was stopped by the clicking tasers.  I used that opportunity quickly scramble to my feet and race into Kim’s arms as she broke free of the man who was holding her back.

I couldn’t help myself.  I sobbed with relief into her shoulder.  I could sense that she was slightly injured from being back-handed, like she was maybe down by one percent vitality. In comparison, I was down by two percent from the kick to my chest.  My chest hurt, but the pain already seemed to be fading.

I broke the embrace and looked at her face.  I could see the red mark just to the left of her left eye that promised to turn into a bruise. “Oh Kim, your eye.  I’m so sorry!”

She reached up and touched the side of her face with a slight grimace. “Oh, it’s nothing that a little concealer won’t hide.  I’ll be fine.  How are you?”

I didn’t get a chance to reply.

I felt a hand grab my shoulder and roughly spin me around and away from Kim. “Are you the one responsible for this disturbance?” A rude person asked me.  

Startled, I looked up to see who could be asking such a strange question. It was a very young and fresh faced L.A. Police Officer standing at the ready with his right hand resting on his gun, like he was ready to draw it at the slightest provocation.  I couldn’t understand why he was acting like I was the one who just tried to kill someone with a knife.

“What?” I asked him, shaking my head slowly back and forth with confusion.

“Don’t give me any trouble, mutie!  Just answer the question!”  He growled at me as he took a step back.

I wondered why he was acting like such an asshole.  I felt Kim tense behind me.  

“Who in the hell do you think you are?”  Kim asked as she stepped in front of me and glanced to his chest. “Officer Parks?  This is a hospital and this young girl is my patient!”

His gaze shifted to her and I could see what little control he had starting to slip.  I was worried that he was going to draw his sidearm any second now.  I couldn’t let him hurt Kim.

“Parks!” I heard someone yell just as I was going to try and pull Kim back behind me.  I looked over and saw an older looking LA police office standing next to an official looking woman wearing a black business suit. “Stand down!”  The other Policeman yelled.

Officer Parks backed up another foot or two as he glanced back to the other police officer and Kim and I. “But Sarge, this one here is a meta!”

I could see the other police officer sigh with frustration. “Rookie! I don’t care if she is the freaking Dalai lama!  The report was about a six foot tall, knife wielding freak chasing a meta in the hospital, not the other way around.”

Office Parks finally took his hand off his sidearm, but  he didn’t look very happy about it.  I felt so glad that the other police officer was there to rein in the rookie, but I wondered who the woman was.

The other police officer seemed to be treating her very respectfully and they were soon joined by large man wearing a black suit.  I wondered if these were the Men in Black and if they were about to pull out some red laser pen things to erase our memories. The three of them talked for another minute while the rookie tried to keep up his intimidating posture with Kim and me.

The MIB man and woman shook hands with the other police officer and turned to walk over to Kim and I.  The other officer glanced over at the Religious_Zealot_01 and then, back to the rookie.  He looked a little frustrated. “Parks!  Get your ass over here!  Get this nut job to the car and I’ll get some statements while you’re making yourself useful!”   He pointed to the still prostrate and very angry Religious_Zealot_01.

I was glad that the Religious_Zealot_01 was handcuffed and still being held down by the hospital security guards.  He was still yelling random bible verses about the signs and prophecies mixed in with psalm this and that.  He really freaked me out with the amount of hate he had for me.  A person he had never met and didn’t even know.  

“But sarge...”  The rookie officer tried to complain as he turned to follow his orders.

The other police officer wasn’t yelling anymore, but I could still hear him from across the hall as he chewed out the rookie in a hushed conversation. “Don’t but sarge me! I’m getting tired of your shit, rookie.  You need to learn to chill out or you will end up off the force and back to busting kids at the mall so fast, it will make your head spin!”

“Yes, sarge.” He muttered.

I stopped trying to eavesdrop on the police when the MIB folks reached Kim and I.  They both flashed matching badges of some kind and the man introduced himself. “Hi. I’m Special Agent Forsythe from the LA Department of Metahuman Affairs and this is Special Agent Helligan from the San Francisco DMA.” He said, motioning to the Woman in Black standing next to him. “Sorry we couldn’t get down here faster, but we got stuck on the seventh floor.”  He smiled apologetically.

Behind the DMA agents, I nervously watched as the rookie helped the Religious_Zealot_01 to his feet.  Agent Forsythe and Agent Helligan both turned to see why I wasn’t paying attention to them.

“Demon!”

I tensed up as the Religious_Zealot_01 made another lunge for me as the rookie loosely held on to him as they started to walk past us.  Agent Forsythe intercepted the nut’s lunge and punched him in the gut, taking the wind out of his sails.  Both of the Agents glared at the rookie as Agent Forsythe pushed the gasping Religious_Zealot_01 back into his hands.  

“God damn it, Parks!  I can’t even trust you to a simple f’ing job!”  The other officer yelled as he stalked over angrily to his partner.

Special Agent Forsythe turned to the other office. “Sergeant Franks, would you like for me to detail one of my agents to assist Officer Parks with securing the suspect?”

Sergeant Franks stopped midway and smiled. “You know, I think that might work.  That way, I can get some good eye witness statements and not tie up folks longer than I have too.  Thanks.”

Agent Forsythe nodded and looked at the black suit dude that I had noticed holding Kim back earlier.  Black suit dude peeled off to help Office Parks finally get the nut out of here.  

Of course, Religious_Zealot_01 wasn’t done making a scene.  He insisted on yelling more religious rants about demons, devils and how we are all going to hell.  He mostly just made everyone uncomfortable and based upon the glances that I saw, I think people were more sympathetic for me.

I breathed a sigh of relief once he was finally gone.  Sergeant Franks walked over and took Kim’s and my statement of what happened.  He also took some statements from the hospital’s guards and looking satisfied, he left to talk to the gift shop clerk.  He was very polite to Kim and me, and he even apologized for his partner’s behavior.

Once he was gone, Special Agent Forsythe and Special Agent Helligan stepped forward. The Agent Helligan lady looked a little impatient, but she did manage to smile a little as she looked at me.

“Okay. We are already behind schedule and traffic is going to be a pain in the ass, but let’s get you upstairs so we can talk to the docs and get you officially released from here before we leave.”

“Ummm, why would I need to go anywhere with you and where are ‘we’ leaving to?” I asked a little heatedly.  The stress of the situation still had me on alert. I didn’t feel too comfortable about the idea of going anywhere and while I knew that they were ‘feds’, I had no idea if I could trust them or not. Kim seemed to mirror my thoughts. I felt her grip on my arm tighten protectively.  Like she wanted to keep me from going anywhere with these people.  

She looked over at Agent Forsythe. He just smiled at her and held up his hands as if to say, “It’s your show.”  She looked back and I could see that she wanted to just get things done. It looked like she wanted to start issuing orders and watch things get done, but she took a deep breath to calm herself. “Look, how about if we take this conversation upstairs? I can fill you...” I think she caught the protective expression on Kim’s face because she stopped for a fraction of a second before she continued. “both in once we get to a more private area.”  She glanced around the crowded hallway to punctuate her statement.

I glanced over my shoulder to Kim and she nodded.  “Okay.  That sounds like a good idea, umm, Agent Helligan?”  I said, not sure if I got her name right, but she nodded her acceptance.

“Okay, let’s get back to your room.” She turned and smiled at Agent Forsythe. “The always helpful Agent Forsythe here can hunt down your doctors and get a copy your records while we go over the plan. Sound good?”

I nodded my head yes and felt Kim’s grip relax as we began to walk over to the elevators.  Agent Helligan, Forsythe and a couple of other black suited dudes fell in behind us.

Kim handed me my purse, along with the sunglasses and hat that I bought. “Umm, you forgot your purse dear.”  She said in a cheerful yet admonishing tone that seemed to say that I should keep better track of my purse.

“Umm, thanks?” I said, not really meaning it as I gingerly held onto my purse. I guess that I looked like the purse was going to bite me, because Kim laughed at me.  I still don’t know how or why should would even think to grab that for me before she left the gift shop.

It wasn’t until the doors closed and we began to rise back to the seventh floor that I felt myself start to relax.  As the tension left my body, I found myself relaxing into Kim. She squeezed my hand tightly once and smiled at me as I looked over at her to see why she squeezed my hand.  I looked back to Agent Helligan to see what she was doing. Her unfocused gazed shifted to me with studied curiosity. Embarrassed, I turned back around just as the elevator came to a stop and the doors opened with a ding sound.

Dr. Weisse and Dr. Silent-Bob, I mean Dr. Morgan, were anxiously standing next to the nurse’s station. I felt surprised that Dr. Weisse looked a little distraught until she saw me and Kim.  “Oh, thank God!” I heard her say as she glanced up to the ceiling for a second.  

Dr. Morgan handed me a clipboard with some forms on it. “Here, sign these please?”

The paper work reminded me of a few things that have kind of slipped my mind. “Umm, Doctor Morgan, do you know what happened to my friends at the show? Did anyone else get hurt?” I asked.

“No, you were the only one who was injured.” Dr. Morgan said.

I felt so relieved.  I wouldn’t want anyone to go through what I have gone through. “Oh, good.”  

I suddenly felt very nervous.  I know that I’m really 27 years old and a bit too old to be expecting my mom and dad to be here, but I should have heard something from them by now.  “Umm, did anyone notify my parents?” I asked.

Dr. Morgan, Dr. Weiss and Kim both look at each other with expressions that tell me that they are trying to hide something from me.  Something that could be painful.  “What?” I asked.

Kim takes a deep breath. “Umm, sweetie.” She grabbed my hands and looking intently at my face.  “Your mom and dad did come, but they left after they saw you change.” Kim said, softly with tears of compassion brimming in her eyes.

I didn’t know what to think.  On one hand, I kind of expected it.  My dad can be a bit of an opinionated bigot at times.  Hell, most of the time actually, and I remembered him ranting about the meta-humans a few months ago.  My mom, she is much more tolerant of other people, but she is also my dad’s wife.  When he gets into his tirades, there is nothing that she can do to stop him, but she has worn him down on some issues.  

“Lemme guess, my dad left swearing like a sailor with my mom apologizing for him as she followed him out?” I asked.

Kim and Dr. Morgan both nodded their heads.  Kim wrapped me up with a hug. “Oh sweetie, I’m so sorry.”

I returned her hug and I couldn’t help it, I shed a few tears.  I couldn’t believe that my own mom and dad had abandoned me while a complete stranger had practically adopted me. Even Agent Helligan looked a little subdued, but I knew that we were on a timetable here. Reluctantly, I broke Kim’s hug and after I wiped my eyes, I turned back to Dr. Morgan.

“Sorry, I do have one more question though.  Umm, how am I going to pay for all this?” I asked, looking around the hospital.  I really didn’t want to have to pay for my hospital stay.  Critical burn units and private rooms are bleeping expensive.  I briefly debated if I could sue LexCorp for making such a crappy headset.

Dr. Morgan looked at me with a slight smile.  “Oh, part will be covered by your medical insurance and what isn’t, the government has already promised to cover. Right, Agent Helligan?” Dr. Morgan asked.

She smiled and nodded her head.  “That is correct.”

I just wondered what I now owed the government because there is nothing scarier than to hear someone say, “Hi, I’m from the government and I’m here to help.”

“Umm, okay.  I guess that is good, sorta.” I said, dubiously as I finished signing my name on all the forms, my old name.  Once done, I handed the clipboard back to Dr. Morgan.

He surprised me by holding out his hand for me to shake.  I hesitantly shook his hand and the sight of my much smaller blue girl hand being engulfed in his hand was a bit disconcerting.  I was so distracted by that odd juxtaposition that I almost missed what he said.

“I am very glad that you are feeling better and I wish you the best of luck with your, umm, adaptation.” Dr. Morgan said as he gently shook my hand.

That was one more thing that I wasn’t used too.  Having my hand gently shaken by a man. Just a few days ago, if a guy had tried shaking my hand like he was just now; I would have thought that he was gay. “Oh, thanks.” I said as I managed to smile, feeling a little touched by his genuine concern for my well being while at the same time, feeling weirded out by it.

Dr. Weisse just gave me a hug. “Hang in there!” She said, whispering in my ear.

“Thanks.” I said, returning her hug.

“Okay, let’s get your stuff and explain what the plan is.” Agent Helligan said.

I couldn’t help not feeling just a little self-conscious as we entered my room.  I noticed how Agent Helligan’s eyebrow raised with amusement at the sight of my pink Hello Kitty suitcase sitting ready to go on the top of my bed.

“Hey, it was on clearance.” I said, trying to defend Kim’s purchase while also making it sound like I didn’t really like it that much.

Agent Helligan just smiled at me. “I think it’s cute.” She said.

I didn’t believe her for a second. “Whatever, so, what is the plan?” I asked.

“It is actually pretty simple. I take you to San Francisco for some additional tests at the STAR labs facility while I also get started on getting your new identity setup. Then, after that, and if you don’t prove to be a danger to society, we release you so that you can happily continue with your new life.” Agent Helligan said.

“Oh, is that it?” I asked, suspiciously.  There had to be more to it than just that.

Agent Helligan frowned. “Well, you will need to agree to some monitoring for the first few months, just so that we can make sure that you will be safe.” She said.

Ah ha!  I knew it!  

“Oh.” I said, instead. I didn’t really want to piss her off.  Not when it sounded like I might need her goodwill.  “Umm, how long will all these tests take and what day is it?” I asked.

Agent Helligan and Kim looked at each other with surprise.  

“What?  How long was I out for?” I asked, feeling a little worried.  What if I had been in a coma for months?

Kim smiled at me.  “Oh, I’m sorry sweetie, umm, Valerie.  It’s Thursday.  You were brought in here Saturday evening.” She said.

I thought I was out longer than that. It’s a little disconcerting to find out that it took less than a week for my body to completely screw the rest of my life up. “Oh, so, umm, Agent Helligan, about those tests?” I asked.

“I would expect that they should only take a day or two, at the most. So, you could be out in time for the weekend and if you don’t mind, I might even have a place that you can stay while I get your paperwork done.”

“How long will the paperwork take?” I asked.

Agent Helligan shrugged her shoulders.  “Oh, it usually only takes a week or two.”

I glanced over to Kim; she nodded her head, yes.  “Umm, could I stay with Kim instead?” I asked, using my best and most polite voice.

Agent Helligan studied Kim for a moment before looking back to me. “I’d prefer that you were closer, but I don’t see why not.” She said.

I couldn’t help myself. I smiled and found myself happily hugging Kim.  This imprinting thing was a real doozy, but at the same time; I couldn’t complain since my real parents had abandoned me.

After  some tearful good-byes and a last minute pit stop in the bathroom, I left the hospital with Agent Helligan.  Pink suitcase proudly towed behind me.  Hey, if you can’t hide it, you might as well make it work. The ride and the company were boring. I was very glad that the back windows were so heavily tinted.  The darkness allowed me to sleep for the first two hours. Until, I woke up and spotted a highway sign with a giant and juicy looking burger advertisement.  My stomach grumbled after that, reminding me that I haven’t eaten in I don’t know how long.

“Umm, I’m really really hungry and I think I have to pee.  Can we stop?” I asked.

“Can you hold it?” Agent Helligan asked, looking annoyed.

“I don’t know?  My plumbing is kinda new.” I said with a quick glance down towards my chest.  “Plus, I am really hungry too.”

Agent Helligan sighed and turned to the driver. “Fine.  Kramer, pull into the next exit.”

“Yes, ma’am.” Kramer said.

I noticed Fergusson, the agent sharing the back seat with me, happily smirking.  I guessed that he wanted to stop too.

“And, stop laughing back there, Fergusson.” Agent Helligan ordered.

“Umm, yes ma’am.” Fergusson said while trying to wipe the smile off his face.

Agent Helligan sighed and turned her head away to look out of her window, but I thought that I noticed a smile before she did.
 

**

“Wow!  That’s amazing, but I can’t believe that cop was such a dick.” Jenny says.

“Yeah, well, me either, but I guess that if my own parents can hate me, why not a complete stranger?” I ask, shrugging my shoulders.

Jenny places her wine glass on the coffee table and turns to face me. “Do you really think that your parents hate you?” Jenny asks, softly, studying my face intently.

I look down at the breasts pushing out of my dress and my blue, smooth and shapely female legs.  “Well, I’m not really their son anymore, am I?” I ask, looking back up to her as my eyes begin to tear up. Growing up, I know that I didn’t always agree with my parents, but I loved them and I knew that they loved me. I still love them and I want nothing more than to hear my mom tell me that she loves me. I can’t really expect my dad to tell me that, but a hug from him wouldn’t suck.

I feel Jenny’s arms wrap around me and I lose what little control I had left.  “Why, why don’t my own parents love me anymore?” I ask.  

“Shhh, I’m sure they do, but they just don’t know how to right now.” Jenny says, trying to make me feel better as she hugs me tighter.

Surprisingly, her words make me feel a little better and I even find some humor in the situation.  I laugh and sniffle a little as my tears stop.  “Oh, I’m such a mess.” I say as I give Jenny a quick squeeze and move to stand. The carpet feels so good on my bare feet.  Those heels really suck to wear and I am glad that as I walk into the kitchen; I walk like a normal person and not all sexy and sultry. If I turn back into a guy tomorrow, I will never look at a woman wearing high heels the same way again.

I grab a paper towel and wipe my eyes as Jenny joins me in the kitchen.  The reminder about food combined with the wine has given me the munchies.  I check the freezer and I find some nuke-a-meals along with some steaks in the freezer.  The nuke-a-meals would be fast, but the thought of trying mostly fake meat by-products doesn’t appeal to me.  The steaks would be good, but they will take time to defrost since I don’t want to ruin them by nuking them.  The sight of the steaks makes my mouth water and my stomach grumble, so I grab and stick them in the sink with some cold water to defrost.

Jenny looks at me with a questioning eyebrow. “A little early for steaks, hungry much?” She asks, smiling.

“Umm, sorta, yeah. I think I have some lunch meat and cheese in the fridge, but I’m out of bread. Do you want a snack of some kind?  I think I have some crackers here.” I say, as I open my cabinets to find the crackers.  Of course, they are on the top shelf and out of reach for my now shorter self.  Well, three inches shorter, so not that much shorter, but he damn crackers are still just out of reach since when I put them up there, I had to use my tippy toes a little.

“Who in the hell put them way up there?” I ask, muttering to myself as Jenny giggles at me. I ignore her impertinence as I climb onto the counter top to reach the crackers.  I am pretty damn flexible now and it takes hardly any effort to do. I am very sure that I would’ve huffed and puffed to get my slightly over-weight male butt to the same.  Not that I would’ve needed too, but just saying.

“Well, that was funny, but you might want to be a bit more careful in that dress.” Jenny says as I triumphantly and gracefully jump down from the top of the counter.

I respond in a very adult manner by sticking my tongue out at her as I walk over, open the fridge and take out the lunch meat and cheese.  I begin to cut the cheese and I even refrain from making a crude joke about it as I do so.  But I think it, and that makes me smile; glad that I’m still capable of thinking crude guy thoughts.

“So, do you still feel like Kim is your Mom?” Jenny asks from beside me.  She has her back to the counter so that she can see my face.

I pause as I consider her question.  I answer her question by having my eyes begin to tear up as I turn my head to look at her.  I am only able to nod my head yes before I have to reach for another paper towel to dry my tears, again.

Jenny gives me another hug. “Hey, why don’t you use my phone and call her to let her know that you’re okay, right now?” She asks, softly.

“I would, but one, I don’t know her phone number since it was programmed for me as a speed dial.  Two, it’s really really late and three, I’m sure that the police would be watching her by now and I don’t want to get her in trouble.” I say.

“Oh, yeah. Good point.” Jenny says.  

I resume prepping the snack.

“Umm, if something should happen to you, not saying that it will or anything, but, if, do you want me to try and get a hold of Kim for you?” Jenny asks, gently.

That question makes me reach for the paper towels again, damn it.  I feel grateful and ashamed at the same time.  

“Yes, please, and can you let her know that I love her and that I’m sorry.” I say before I really start crying.

It takes me less than 30 seconds before I am able to resume prepping the snack track and a few minutes after that, snack tray in hand, we retire back into the living room.  I devour over half the tray before I manage to slow down enough to resume the story.
 

**

Purse in hand, yuck, and sunglasses firmly over my eyes, Agent Fergusson and Agent Helligan accompanied me into the fast food restaurant.  Out of habit, I took my sunglasses off after we entered the restaurant. I debated just flipping them up, but then I remembered that I had a purse to hold such things. I tucked them safely amongst the tampon things. The lighting still seemed pretty bright in inside the restaurant, but I didn’t want to attract attention by leaving them on.  I mean, except for the blind, movie stars and people who are stoned, who wears sunglasses indoors?

Just entering the restaurant and going right to the restrooms caused a small stir among the few customers who saw me.  It made me worried about what would happen when I tried to order some food where everyone could see me.

Agent Helligan entered the women’s restroom with me as Agent Fergusson hovered outside the door.  I was a little put off by my first trip into the women’s public restroom. First of all, there were only two stalls and one of those was already taken.  The tampon dispenser on the wall was also a bit of a shock for me. I guess that I shouldn’t have been surprised to see it there since the men’s room usually has condom machines, but it was still a not-so gentle reminder of my change in, umm, perspectives.  

Agent Helligan was kind enough to let me use the empty stall first, but I think that she just wanted to be able to keep an eye on me and she probably didn’t even need to go right now.  The seat was pretty clean. I expected it to need a good scrubbing with toilet paper before I could sit down on it.  The men’s seats are always full of pee from jackasses who think they have good aim. I guess that the third time is the charm, because I completed my business with the minimum of fuss. It still felt weird to wipe my girl junk though.  Even with a slight delay due to my girl noobieness, I still finished before the lady in the other stall.

“Finally. Wait for me.”  Agent Helligan said as she took my place in the stall.

As I washed my hands, I heard the toilet being flushed.

Wow, Agent Helligan is fast!

“Eeek!” I heard a woman exclaim with surprise and it didn’t sound like anything Agent Helligan would ever say.

That made me jump. “Ahh!” I said, turning back to look at who just made me jump.  It was the lady in the other stall.

The woman kind of calmed down. I think that my “Ahhing” at her “Eeeking” reassured her somehow. “I’m sorry.” She said, clutching her chest as she started to walk towards the sink.  

“Oh, I’m sorry too. I didn’t mean to scare you there.” I said with a nervous laugh.

She laughed, but she still looked a little nervous as she used the second sink to wash her hands as I resumed washing my hands.  She was working really hard to not be rude and stare at me.  That made me feel kind of bad for her.

“Umm, filming a movie nearby.” I said, trying to give her a believable explanation for my condition since I don’t think that the silver oxide poisoning explanation would work with her.

She relaxed with a quick sigh before laughing. “Oh, well, the make-up is really good.  I’m sorry for being so curious, but are those contacts in your eyes?” She asked.

I totally forgot about my evil looking red eyes. I guess that blue skin, pointy ears and silver hair isn’t that scary to see on someone, but red eyes are like something out of a horror or evil villain movie.  “Yeah and I can’t wait to take them out!  They dry my eyes out like crazy, but it takes a long time to get them in and the director hates delays.”  I said, lying my ass off, but somehow sounding convincing at the same time.  

I heard the other toilet flush and Agent Helligan exit the stall with a stern expression on her face.  The woman looked over at Agent Helligan before looking back at me with a confused expression.  “Umm, lemme guess, she’s playing the part of a secret government agent, right?” She asked.

I couldn’t help it, I giggled. “Yep!  She looks pretty convincing when she’s in costume, but don’t let her expression fool you. She’s really a nice person, but she’s also one of those method actors who like to really get into their role to make it more authentic.” I said, using air quotes around method to help sell it.

Agent Helligan didn’t smile, but she didn’t yell at me either.  I think she wanted to though.

“Oh, yeah, you’re right.” The woman said, turning back to look at me with a sympathetic expression as she finished washing her hands while I pretended to mess with my contacts using the mirror.

Once the woman left the restroom, Agent Helligan took her place at the sink.  “That was pretty good Wilson, but you might want to put on your sunglasses before we exit the restroom.”  She said without even a trace of a smile.

She really needed to learn how to relax.

I guessed that since I am now a movie star, wearing my sunglasses indoors wouldn’t be that out of place anymore.  The teenage boy behind the register was a little surprised by my appearance. “Movie.” I said with an embarrassed smile.

He gulped with relief. “Oh, okay. Sorry, for a second there I thought that you were one of those meta’s.” He said.

I couldn’t help it, I giggled a little at the absurdity of it all.  Here I was, a meta, pretending to be an actor, who was pretending to be a horror movie monster.  “Yeah, I can’t wait to get out of all this makeup!” I said.

“I bet! So, what can I get for you?” He asked.

I looked up at the menu.  As hungry as I felt, It all looked good.  “Umm, I’ll take two quarter pound deluxe burgers, large order of fries and a large,” I heard a slight cough from beside me. “, umm, small coke. To go?” I said, looking at Agent Helligan for confirmation.  She nodded her head yes.

“Wow, are ya sure?” The register dude asked.

Even Agent Helligan looked a little surprised by my order.

“Umm, yeah.” I said as I looked over to Agent Fergusson standing nearby.  I figured that if I can’t eat it all, he can finish it for me.

“Will that be all, ma’am?” The register dude asked, looking at me.

Agent Helligan stepped forward as I moved to the side to try and get some money out of my purse.  Damn purses are so much harder to deal with compared to a wallet in the back pocket of my jeans. “No, I’ll take your chef salad and an orange juice with your light Italian dressing.  Fergusson?”  She asked.

Now, I felt like a pig for ordering two burgers. I zipped my purse back up and hoped that Agent Helligan was paying for all of us. After Fergusson ordered his food, Helligan ordered a burger and coke for Kramer.  Without a word of explanation, she paid for it all using her credit card.  I guessed that she was able to expense it.

Back in the SUV, Kramer looked happy to be given a bag with a burger and a drink.  Well, he smiled once before Agent Helligan’s expression brought him back to reality.  I opened my bag and the smell of freshly deep fried french fries made me gag a little.  I held the bag away from my face and gingerly dug my bag of fries out to inspect them.  They looked okay.

I took a bite out of one of them and it was all I could do to not spit it out immediately.  The fries tasted horrible!  I looked over at Fergusson and he was happily munching on his fries.  

“Umm, do your fries taste funny?” I asked him.

“Nope, why? Something wrong with yours?” He asked, looking concerned.

“I dunno, they just don’t taste right to me.” I said, holding them away from me.

He reached over, snagged one from me and gave it a taste.  “Nope, taste fine to me.” He said.

Maybe it was just the one I tried.  I randomly grabbed another one from my bag and it tasted worse than the first one.  Frustrated, I handed my fries to Fergusson.  “Here, you can have ‘em” I said.

Did they spit on my fries or something in there?  I hoped that my burgers were okay.  I dug out one of those and carefully inspected the bun and inside to see if I could spot anything that didn’t belong.  Nope, the first burger looked normal and the fresh cooked hamburger smelled pretty good to me.  I took a bite and initially, it tasted awesome, but after a few chews with the lettuce, tomato and union mixing it up with the bun and the meat, I decided it didn’t taste so good anymore.  It took all my will power to not spit it back out.

Now both, Agent Fergusson and Agent Helligan were looking at me.  “I don’t know why, but this burger tastes horrible.” I said, trying not to cry out of frustration.  I felt so hungry.

Agent Helligan thought about it for a second. “Try just the burger.” She said.

I didn’t know how that could help. If a hamburger tasted bad and the burger part was the main part of the hamburger experience, how could trying just the burger part help?  I tentatively took a small bite of just the meat.  It tasted wonderful!  Maybe a little overcooked, but still wonderful.

“How did that taste?” Agent Helligan asked.

“Awesome.” I said, hoping that my first bite just had a little too much of some seasoning on it.

I tried another full bite of burger and this time, I couldn’t stop myself. I had to spit it out.  It was just nasty.  “What the hell?!? What is wrong with this fucking burger!?” I asked, yelling with frustration.

I took a sip of my coke and that helped wash some of the bad taste from my mouth. I was glad that the coke wasn’t bad too.

“Hmm, okay, try just that bit of meat you just spit out.” Agent Helligan said.

I couldn’t see how that would help, but I tried it and it tasted great.  “Umm, it tastes good. So what is wrong?” I asked.

“Try each of the remaining items separately.” She said.

“Okaayy.” I said, dubiously as I picked out the piece of tomato and immediately spit it back out. It tasted horrible.  The lettuce was the same and the bun was just okay, not good and not bad.

“Well, I’d have to say that you are probably now a carnivore.  Your tastes and small fangs kind of prove it, but I’m sure we can find out for sure at the labs.” She said before she turned back to ignore me and eat her nasty looking salad.

I quickly separated the meat and the bun from all the healthy salad crap.  The non-deluxe and basic burger tasted awesome.  I repeated that with the second burger and sat back with a contented smile as I sipped my wimpy small coke.  I was still a little hungry and now I wished that I had ordered a third burger instead of the fries.

I must have fallen asleep after that because the next thing I knew, Agent Fergusson was gently shaking me awake. I looked out of the window and I was surprised to see that it was dark outside and that we were parked in front of a large hospital looking building.

I felt great as Agent Kramer opened my door for me and the fresh night air hit me. I couldn’t get out of that SUV fast enough.  I felt so energized as I looked up at the partially obscured moon.  I couldn’t tell if it was a full, half or crescent moon, but the moonlight felt great on my face. It reminded me of how the first ray’s of sunlight felt after a cloudy day.

Agent Kramer laughed as he took my pink Hello Kitty luggage out of the back of the SUV for me.

“Hey, it was on clearance!” I said, angrily grabbing the handle from his hands.

He held up his hands in mock surrender and smiled. “Whatever you say, ma’am.”

“Grrrr, damn clearance sales.” I said, muttering under my breath I towed it behind me.

I felt a little bit of sadness hit me as the moonlight and fresh night air was cut off when we entered the building. My attention was grabbed by the sight of two more black suited male agents and a female nurse waiting for us inside the lobby area.  Nurse Shannon informed us that all of the STAR lab doctors had already gone home for the night, but she had been given some instructions to get some basic lab work done on me and once done with that, show me my room.  I saw her smile at the sight of my suitcase, but that helped because she decided that I needed to be shown my room first instead.  I decided that I liked her.

The room looked like a standard private hospital room. It had the standard bed and cheap lounge chair for guests, but I was amazed at what else it had.  It had a window that looked out over the entrance of the Pacific Ocean to the north and the Golden Gate Bridge to the North East. With the moon randomly peeking through the clouds, I just wanted to stand in front of the window all night, but that was not to be.  The lab work needed to be finished first.  On the plus side, the room also had a private bathroom with shower.  I felt like I could really use a shower now too.

I got stuck with Agent Thompson and Agent Rollins for the night. I was surprised that Agent Helligan thought that I needed two babysitters.  

I felt a bit nervous about having my height and weight taken.  I know that I’m a little shorter than I was, but I didn’t really know how much shorter.  I was a 5’ 11”, pasty white, slightly out of shape geek dude that weighed in at 250lbs.  Okay, I was more than a little out of shape.  So, I was a little shocked to discover that I was now only 5’ 8” and weighed in at a measly 135 lbs.  I guessed that it could have been worse. I could have been shrunk down to the average 5’ 4” female height.

After the weigh-in, she took my blood pressure and entered everything into her workstation.  She seemed pretty happy with the results.  Not at all like my last visit when my doctor warned me about my weight, cholesterol and high blood pressure.

Next up were the blood samples and she needed to fill three of those little vials. I found out that I seem to heal faster than normal because a minute after my blood was done being drawn, the needle holes were completely healed and undetectable.

The hard part of the preliminary tests was the urine sample because that is when I learned just how difficult it is to pee into a cup as a girl.  By the time I finally got the cup half full, I almost wished that one of the Agents could have come in and held the damn cup for me.

After that, I washed my hands, a lot, before I finally exited the bathroom. Agent Thompson took a surprised half-step back as he saw my pissed off expression.  I guess that I looked a little scary.

Nurse Shannon surprised me. “Oh, Valerie, you’re done?  I was just about to check on you and see if you needed some help.” She said.

“Oh.” I said, blushing at the idea that a 27 year old guy, err, teenage looking girl would need help peeing in a cup and feeling ashamed about it because I did.

“Well, I am guessing that your probably a little new at this, but don’t worry; it gets easier with more practice.” She said with a smile before she continued after a moment’s hesitation. “Well, mostly...”

I frowned at her admission, but at least she was being honest about it. Maybe someone should invent something to make it easier for women to take urine samples because as a former guy, I have to say that guys have it easy. For guys, it’s like, “Wee! Look at me! Oh, all full and done!” but as a girl, it’s difficult, frustrating, embarrassing and messy.

“Well, we are all done for tonight.  Want me to take you to your room and maybe have some food sent up for you?” Nurse Shannon asked with a smile.

I don’t think that I really had a choice in the matter. What else could I have done? Aimlessly wandered the halls?  Walked down to the nearest mall to get some shopping done? “Umm, sure.  Sounds good.” I said as I she stood beside me to lead me to my room.  As we walked down the empty halls, I started to worry about hospital food. “Umm, Nurse Shannon?”

“Yes, dear?” She asked, treating me like the teenage girl that I looked like.  I wasn’t sure if that was good or bad.  She knew that I wasn’t born a girl, but maybe she thought I really was as old as I looked instead of an adult 27 years old.  Of course, I was kind of acting like a girl. Well, not really, but I wasn’t burping, being rude or scratching my butt.  Perception is reality and all that.

“About the food, can you have them just send me the meat portions?  I tried to eat some veggies today.” I‘m not sure if I should have counted French fries, lettuce and tomatoes as veggies, but oh well. “And they tasted horrible to me. I think I might be a carnivore or something now.” I said.

She smiled patiently at me. “Maybe it was just the veggies. You need your vitamins and minerals dear.”

Yep, she thought that I was really as old as I appeared to be, but I still used my best pleading expression.

It worked. “Okay, I will ask the kitchen to give you an extra portion of meat, just in case.”

Yeah! I smiled.

“But, I want you to at least try your veggies young lady!” She said, sternly.

She must have kids at home or something.

Agent Thompson and Agent Rollins performed a quick visual inspection of my room before leaving me to my privacy. “Miss Wilson, we will be right outside here if you need something.” Agent Rollins said.

“Umm, thanks?” I said but I think that I liked “ma’am” better.  “Miss” made me sound so young. I blame Nurse Shannon. Her reactions to me must have rubbed off on the Agents.

As soon as the door closed behind my wardens, I turned off the too bright lights, dug through my purse, extracted my phone and hit Kim’s number.  It was a little late at 9pm, but it wasn’t that late. I hoped that I wasn’t waking her up or something.  I felt relieved when she answered her phone after only three rings.

“Valerie! I’m so glad you called. I was starting to get worried.” Kim said.

I wasn’t sure how to reply to that.  “Oh, I’m just glad that I didn’t wake you up. I didn’t wake you up, did I?” I asked.  

I hear a man’s voice in the back ground yell. “Honey, who is it?”

“Umm, it’s Valerie.” Kim said, yelling back and sounding slightly muffled.

“You haven’t told, umm, Dad yet, have you?” I asked, trying to hold back my laughter.

“You brat. I’ll tell him, don’t worry.” Kim said.

“So, umm, how was the rest of your day?” I asked.

“Oh, it was actually pretty boring after you left. How was the drive?”

“Well, I got hungry, talked Ms. Crabby Panties into stopping for some food, found out I hated everything except the meat and the bun and learned that urine tests suck, but my room has an awesome view of the Golden Gate Bridge.” I said in a rush of information.

Kim laughed and the sound of her laughter made me feel very happy.  She described her normal routine of cooking dinner, feeding her boys, watching some TV and just having what sounded like some good family time together. It made me wish that it was the weekend already so that I could join them. My food arrived about 20 minutes into her description, but I was too absorbed in the conversation to pay attention to the food.  I really wondered what was wrong with me, because I actually felt interested and wanted to know about her family.  I couldn’t stop asking questions.  I asked what games Nick and John liked to play. That question spawned more questions and before I knew it, it was really late.

“Honey, it’s time for bed.” I heard a man’s voice say on Kim’s end.

“Okay Dear, I’ll be right there.” Kim said.

We talked with each other for another 30 minutes before Kim finally started yawning and I felt guilty for keeping her away from her husband.

“Well, I need to get to bed, Valerie.  Call me tomorrow as soon as you can. Love you.” Kim said.

“Yes, Mom. I love you too. Night.” I said, softly as the wonder of it all soaked in and made me really miss her.  I never had a brother or sister. I wondered what it would be like to have two younger brothers to spoil and play video games with.

The food was cold as I lifted the cover.  There was a serving of peas with some mashed potatoes and two chicken breasts covered with gravy.  I dubiously tried a pea and it tasted so bitter and nasty.  I devoured the chicken breasts though.  The mashed potatoes, I was only able to eat half of those and only with copious amounts of gravy.  

My phone beeped at me and curious, I checked it out.  It was a text from Kim. “I told Jim. Was tuff @ first, but we will all come up to get u. <3 Kim.”

I immediately texted back, “:) <3 u 2 Valerie”  Then, I hugged my phone and cried on my bed for at least 10 minutes.  When I finally managed to stop crying, I clutched my phone firmly in my hand, in case Kim sent me another text, and walked over to look out the window.  The clouds had broken up some and I was able to see more of the moon. It was a half-moon and the light made me feel so relaxed and at peace. The damn guest chair was heavy, but I managed to push it over to the window.  Hugging my phone, I made myself comfy in the chair and just stared up at the moon lost in thought for an hour before I remembered that I wanted to take a shower.

I extracted the shampoo, conditioner and special girl soap with vital moisturizers and vitamins for my skin. I almost only grabbed the shampoo, but I remembered that my wonderful ex-girlfriend always used conditioner in her hair and would complain when she ran out.
 

**

“You’re laying it on pretty thick there, Ally!” Jenny says, trying to not laugh.

“Well, you do use conditioner when you wash your hair, right?” I asked, tilting my head to the side and smirking at her.

“Why, yes, yes I do.  So, how long was your first shower?” Jenny asks with an evil grin.

That takes the wind out of my sails.  “Umm, I don’t remember?” I say, mumbling before I jump up and run into the kitchen. “Oops! Gotta check the steaks!”

“Ally! Get back here! You didn’t answer my question.” Jenny says, yelling with exasperation.

The steaks are about half defrosted, but Jen corners me in the kitchen. “Well? How was your first shower?”

“Jen!” I say, indignantly as I cross my arms. “It was just a shower, honest!”

“Oh no, it wasn’t. I can tell. There is no way that you could take just a shower with a body like that.  At least not the first time.” Jen says, with her hands on her hips.  She really looks serious about this.

“I really don’t want to talk about it.” I say, looking down at the floor full of embarrassment.

“Was it that nice?” Jen asks, completely relentless.

I start to cry and Jenny finally starts to understand that I’m not at all comfortable with this topic and maybe my shower didn’t go like she is expecting.

“I’m sorry. I just assumed that, you know.” Jen says as she hugs me.

“I couldn’t touch myself.  My, umm, breasts, my legs, my butt, my umm, you know, my own skin.  Everything felt so strange, so sexual and so very wrong. I felt like I was a pedophile in my own body. I got my hair wet, saw and felt the warm water running over my sexy smooth skin and I couldn’t go any further...” I say, through my tears as I cry on her shoulder.

“Oh Ally, I’m so so sorry. I didn’t realize how hard it could be.” Jen says as she alternates between stroking my hair and hugging me as I sob on her shoulder.

We stand in the kitchen for I don’t know how long before I finally stop crying. My emotions swing in the total opposite direction in an instant and a giggle escapes me.  

Jenny holds on to my shoulders as she stood back to study at my face.  “What?” She asks.

“I stink and I really need to take a shower, now.” I say, softly as another giggle escapes from me.

Jenny smiles and gives me another hug. “I’ll help!” She says.

My head almost explodes at the thought of having Jenny in the shower with me.  Our naked bodies soaping each other up and giggling as we help each other get clean.  “Really?” I ask.

“Well, I’ll stay in the bathroom with you.  Why? What were you thinking?” Jenny asks with a knowing smirk.

“Oh, umm, you know, nothing.” I say, feeling myself blush and doubly glad that my blue skin doesn’t show blushes.

Jenny starts to laugh and I can’t stop myself as I join her.

“Come on, let’s get you in the bathroom and get you out of that dress.” Jen says as she pulls me towards the bathroom.

I completely forget that if I take off my dress and get into the shower, she will see me naked.