Tonight I said goodbye to the man I love, knowing that I likely will not ever see him again. I doubt that he knows anything of my feelings toward him. He is 29, I am 64, so it is well that I never utter a word about it. He did something that is just not done in his faith, he hugged me goodbye and when he did my heart broke.

You see, he is from Saudi Arabia, and is a very moderate and loving Muslim. He does not know about "it" and I will never tell him, rather I have just tried to be a helpful woman helping a sometimes discouraged young man to come to America, get an education and return to Saudia better for it, and hopefully be part of the wave of change in the Middle East that will make the world a better place.

I just wanted to help someone because they needed it, and I could do it. I had not planned to become emotionally involved with him; not planned to make a fool of myself by falling in love with something forbidden. I can't help myself, it just happened, and I did not realise until he left the house that it had happened.

There is no intention, implied or otherwise to engage in any selfish, self serving drama like talk of suicide. Just becareful who you fall in love with.

Much love

Gwendolyn