Well, I think my hair has become the ideal symbol for my in-between gender status. See, I wear a wig when I go out as Dorothy, (although, sometimes, at work, I sweat enough under it to wish I didn't have to) so I don't pay a lot of attention to my natural hair. But, sometimes, I do have to deal with it, as I simply cant seem to manage long (natural) hair, and it ends up looking horrible. But then there comes the quandary - what kind of style and cut should I get? I really hate having a super masculine cut, but can I pull off a more androgynous look around the ex? Speaking of the ex, she had a little freak-out the other day over the fact I now have a pink wallet. Sometimes, that woman drives me up a wall ....
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Hairstyle
Go with a hairstyle that can be quickly converted to a pushback. I've combed my hair back ever since I got out of wrestling (before that it was a flat-top, yes I was a jock). But I notice that if you want something with bangs, that in a push, if you comb them backwards it makes a respectable male style.
K.T. Leone
My fiction feels more real than reality
Katie Leone (Katie-Leone.com)
Writing is what you do when you put pen to paper, being an author is what you do when you bring words to life
Inbetween status.
A Nice ride around Manchester to finish off the Sparkle weekend.
I wear my own hair both enfemme and enhomme. It's white, it's shoulder length and the front is not quite yet long enough to gather into the back ponytail. Consequently I have several options.
Firstly, I explained my circumstances to my newfound hairdresser by telling her up front that I am a permanant 'inbetweenie' I have boobs, I go out dressed enfemme to clubs and Beverly is an 'in-your-face' wild thing who behaves disgracefully on the dance floor in either gay or straight clubs.
Bevan on the other hand maintains his portfolio of houses and, when decorating or lumbing or working at anything involving building, he usually wears his hair in a 'double ponytail' backed up with a black Alice Band. It pulls the hair back quite severely and gives me a 'Croydon Facelift'.
My wife is a 'supersaint' because she tolerates my condition without participating in my lifestyle. When I go out with her, I have to 'man myself up' and wear a proper jacket and tie. I just about pass as a normal man with long hair.
My regular tradesmen accept that I am trangendered for my boobs are clearly visible under a vest or tee-shirt when I'm working alongside them as their employer. The can't object cos' I pay their wages.
This is me in my normal 'Homme mode' when going amongst my building team. They are happy to accept it and sometimes we share a pint at lunch time. (It's not very manly is it?)
My advice to you is be bold and speak to your hairdresser. She or he can give you a cut that will eventually work as a male ponytail or a full head of femme hair. All you need is patience to grow it, that is if you've got a full head of hair.
I have.
As a contrast, this is me in Femme mode while being respectable and lady like.
Then this is me in wild crazy 'growing old disgracefully mode' and yes, I'm a mad bitch.
And this is when I'm totally off the wall and in your face.
I'm the mad bitch with the basque and her own white hair. Believe me, anything goes at the national transgendered weekend in Manchester UK. That picture was taken on the grand staircase of the Britannia hotel just before we went into breakfast after clubbing all night.
Happy transitioning.
Bev.
PS.
There is a funny tale about the last picture.
A gang of us tee-girls where indulging in photoshoots on the grand staircase and we were giggling as usual while we each arranged our poses. Suddenly from behind the stairs a man's voice started giving loud instructions in an American accent. Naturally we all stopped to see what was going on then we realised he was talking to a large bunch of people and preparing them to proceed into breakfast. We realised we would be stuck behind them so we hurriedly completed our photoshoots and quickly stood by the doors in anticipation of them opening for breakfast at 0700 sharp. (It's a huge hotel and one of the most famous in Manchester.)
Anyway to our amusement and amongst much hilarity a huge parade of sturdents appeared in precise order behind us and they stared disbelievingly at about a dozen Tee-girls in various modes of outlandish clubbing styles. Behind the students came the adult chaperones who stared at us transfixed with various expressions ranging from amusement to disapproval.
Naturally the students were as curious as all hell and they couldn't believe that we had returned from the clubs at seven a.m. after clubbing all night. One even asked if it was legal to go around dressed as we were. We had the great delight of explaining to the kids that 'This was England and this was Manchester!' Anything goes, (well almost anything ... murder and transphobic abuse are a strict no-no in the UK.)
The kids were overwhelmed and amused by us and we behaved courteously towards them just as they behaved impecabbly towards us.It turned out that the huge group were the Ohio State University Marching Band. Nice kids.
We felt we'd done our bit for improving transgendered relations cos several of the kids came on to us during the weekend to express support and thanks. I suppose they might have had gender issues so we might have given them hope or encouragement. At no time were any of the kids rude or bad mannered and i have to admit, their adult chaperones seemed pretty okay with it as well. We even met some of them early one evening when we were taking coffee in the bar before going clubbing later on. They chatted at length with us and we explained that the hotel, although being in the very centre of Manchester was right on the edge of the gay village and only a block away from Canal Street.
That's all. Good luck with your transitioning.
Bev/ Beverly/ Bevan. XXX
Hairstyle
A lot will depend on your age, I think. As women get older, at least in the UK, their hair tends to favour shorter styles. Take a look around you at others your age and try to 'blend in' (which after all, you're trying to do anyway). Fortunately these days longer hair in men is acceptable if you're careful.
I wear my own hair and I have a female hairdresser who knows who and what I am. I have 'bangs' and the rest is just short of my collar, but it covers both ears. It's a horrible mixture of white, grey and natural so I have it all dyed every six weeks. Not particularly masculine, but that's fine by me.
When I'm in 'man' mode I sweep the bangs to either side and carefully comb the sides so they sweep back over my ears. It is parted down the middle. Almost respectable. When I'm being the real me I arrange the bangs across my forehead and usually blow dry the rest so it has a huge amount of body and swept back from the top. The sides will completely cover my ears with the tips swung forwards over my cheeks. No parting. Looks a bit '60s but I've seen real women with similar styles around town.
I'm glad I can get away with using my own hair. I dread the time I might be forced to wear a wig. If you want to properly be Dorothy, you will want to get rid of the wig as soon as you dare and manage your own hair like any other woman would.
Good Luck!
Penny