Keeping It Real

When the extended DeFranco family chooses sides over Tony's new daughter, Josie finds it hard to hold tight to who she truly is.
But a chance encounter with Tommy Browder and his girlfriend Jennifer helps put things in perspective.

Keeping It Real
A Tommy Browder Tale

by Randalynn

Copyright © 2010 Randalynn.
All Rights Reserved.

 

"This above all: to thine own self be true,
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man.”
- Hamlet, act I, scene iii.
 
 
“We have all a better guide in ourselves, if we would attend to it,
than any other person can be.” - Jane Austen

 
 
 
Tommy Browder stood at the entrance to the food court and sighed, his hands full of shopping bags.

‘Thank God that’s over,’ he thought. ‘Now all I need to do is chill and wait for Jen, and that shouldn’t be hard.’

He moved forward, looking for an empty table where he could put down the bags and set up camp, maybe pick up a snack or something while he waited. The place was pretty crowded this close to lunch, and empty tables were hard to find.

Then he heard several people laughing, and turned to see a dark-haired girl sitting alone at a corner table surrounded by three older boys. She was hunched over, trying to protect herself as they hung over her, tugging at her hair and trying to poke her chest. When she tossed her head to shake a lock of hair free from one of the boys, Tommy realized that the girl was Josie, Tony DeFranco’s “new” daughter.

He sighed. ‘Why are there so many idiots in the world? And why do I seem to run into more than my share?’

“Josie!” he called, and all three of the boys looked up. “Hey, girl, I’ve been looking everywhere for you. Thanks for finding us a table.”

The tallest of the boys looked at him as if he was some kind of alien.

“Can I help you with something?” Tommy said, dumping the bags on a chair.

“Yeah.” The leader of the group grinned. “Why don’t you take a walk?”

Tommy looked back, narrowed his eyes and cocked his head.

“Just took one,” he replied evenly. “Now it’s your turn.”

“What do you mean?”

“What I said. I’m gonna have lunch with my friend, and you’re gonna walk away.”

One of the other boys stepped forward, his lip curled in a sneer. “Who’s gonna make us? You?”

Tommy smiled, and shook his head. “Hell, no. It’s my day off. And it’s not my job anyway. That’s what they pay the guy in the uniform over there for, isn’t it — dealing with jerks like you?”

The leader put his hand on the second boy’s shoulder and glared at Tommy. “What’s your problem?”

“I don’t have a problem.” Tommy’s voice cut through the background noise of the food court. “You do. Or you will, if you don’t stop messing with my friend and leave.”

The third boy stepped forward.

“Listen, man, you’ve got it wrong. This isn’t even a girl,” he said, apparently trying to be helpful. “He’s Jo —“

Tommy stepped forward and put his finger on the boy’s chest. His mouth snapped shut.

“Hey,” he said softly. “I know who she is, and so does she. You don’t. But that’s okay. All you need to know is that if you don’t leave now, I’ll call the mall security guy over and tell him you’re hassling Josie here. Then if you don’t leave, he’ll use his radio to call some of his mall security friends, and none of you will be able to come back here and bother anybody again. Ever.”

Josie looked up at Tommy, and saw him smile, very slowly. The third boy took a step back.

“They don’t care who she is, and neither should you. All they care about is who’s causing trouble, and who isn’t. And they can ban your asses if they want to. So why not save everybody a lot of trouble, and get the hell out of here?” Tommy looked over the boy’s shoulder. "Unless you want to be banned? Hey, he's looking this way!"

He started to raise his hand to get the security guy's attention. All three boys glanced quickly over their shoulders, saw him looking back, and walked quickly towards the escalators. Tommy watched them go until they sank out of sight, then fell into a chair with a sigh.

“Thank you,” Josie said with a smile. The boy shook his head.

“Damn, I hate malls,” he replied. She looked at him, and he shrugged. “It’s not personal or anything. I just don’t like shopping. I mean, I don’t mind getting the things I need, but places like this are full of people who either want things just for the sake of having them — or jerks who don’t seem to have anywhere better to go, and nothing else to do here but cause trouble.”

She looked at him. “So if you hate malls so much, why are you here?”

He shrugged. “Aunt Phyllis heard that Jen and I were gonna meet here and decided that I needed more clothes to last out the summer. She gave me a chunk of cash to make it happen, and wouldn’t take no for an answer.” He picked up a few bags and shook them. “So ... more clothes. Most of it is the same as the stuff I have at home, only now I have more of it. Mission accomplished.”

Tommy dropped the bags back on the chair, and Josie tilted her head. “I still don’t get it. You hate malls. Why meet here?”

“I don’t like shopping, but Jennifer does, and what makes her happy makes me happy. Since I get to make Aunt Phyllis happy, too, it’s a win-win.”

“But you’re not happy.”

“Sure I am. I just get my happiness where I can find it. Today, I’m finding it by giving Jen and Aunt Phyllis what they want. I might even get some from you, once you forget about those dumbasses.” Tommy grinned, then gave Josie a closer look. “I like the hair. It’s nice. Much better than the blonde wig.”

She reached up and touched it gently. “Thanks. I got hair extensions, and they’re the same color as my real hair. Really expensive, too. Once Mom and Daddy decided to let me be who I really am, Mom put her foot down and made Daddy agree to pay for ‘em. He didn’t fuss too much — said my being blonde just didn’t seem right. It made his teeth ache, whatever that means.” She smiled. “And since it brings me closer to passing in public, he didn’t put up too much of a fuss. He’s still worried about something happening to me again.” She sighed. “Like it almost did today.”

Tommy shifted in his seat. “I hate to say it, but that’s ‘cause you didn’t think like a girl.”

Josie looked up. “What do you mean?”

“You were so busy trying not to call attention to yourself that you didn’t even think about calling the security guy. It’s his job to protect girls from being hassled. Most girls know that in a place like this, help is only a shout away.”

She went very quiet. Tommy reached out and touched her hand. “Hey, it’s okay. You’re still new at this.”

“No, I knew he was there, and I knew I should have called him.” Josie looked down at her hands. “I was just ... afraid.”

“Of him?” She nodded. “Why?”

“What if he turned out just like them? What if they told him who I ... who I used to be, and he took their side?”

For once, Tommy had nothing to say. Josie sighed.

“So many people seem to have a problem with this,” she said. “Most of Daddy’s sibs are okay about it, but a few of his brothers haven’t said a word to me since this all came out, and Papa Joe doesn’t even want to admit I exist. Daddy has had more than a few fights with him, and now he’s not speaking to Papa Joe either. Half the family is mad at the other half, and I’m the one responsible.”

“No you’re not.” Tommy said. “You’re just doing what you have to do to be who you are. If somebody else has a problem with it, it’s their problem, not yours.”

“But they make it my problem when who I am is the thing that makes the family fight.” Josie shook her head, and her new hair moved gently over her shoulders. She threw back her head and shook it, then reached up and tugged a few loose strands out of the corner of her mouth. “This is going to take some getting used to.”

Tommy nodded. “And not just the hair. You need to keep holding tight to who you are, no matter how many people freak on you.”

Josie looked down. “You’re right, It’s just ... hard.”

“Harder than pretending to be a boy all the time?” She looked up at him and Tommy smiled. “Look, you already figured out that you can’t live your life trying to be something you’re not. You tried that for years, remember? You only made yourself sad. Then you stood up and told your folks the truth. They’re standing by you, and so am I. And so is everyone else in your family that sees the girl you really are.”

“And the others? What do I do about them?”

Tommy shrugged. “Nothing. You gotta do what’s right for you, just like other people have to do what’s right for them. If Papa Joe and the others can’t see who you really are, it’s because they can’t see past what they think you are. Most folks don’t want to look at the world twice — they like thinking they already see things the way they are. But someday, maybe, with your Dad’s help, Papa Joe will learn to see past what he wants to see and see what’s real instead.” He smiled. “And I know Tony. He’s stubborn — he won’t give up until your granddad gives you a hug and makes you feel welcome.”

“You think so?”

“I know so. Like I said, I know your Dad. And Papa Joe raised him, so the old man’s gotta be smart enough to listen to Tony ... eventually.” She grinned at that, and he grinned back.

He stood up. “Hey, I need a Coke. Would you watch my stuff for me?”

Josie smiled up at him. “Sure!”

“Do you need anything?” She shook her head and waved at her own half-empty drink. Tommy smiled. “Okay, back in a sec.”

Josie picked up her soda and took a sip, watching the people walking by. Her new life was a swirl of new sensations that made her feel so right so much of the time. She loved the way the soft breeze from the air conditioning caressed her smooth legs, and the strappy heels on her feet. She loved how her new hair caressed her back with every move of her head, and even loved the way her bra straps tugged at her shoulders with the weight of her breast forms.

But best of all, she loved not living a lie. She loved not having to pretend to be Joey anymore. She loved that Mom and Daddy finally saw that she needed to be herself, and that Tommy came along when he did that night to save her.

‘I guess he wound up saving me twice that night,’ she thought, ‘once from Keller, and once when he made Daddy see me for who I truly am.’

Josie went to put her cup back on the table and noticed the trace of lipstick around the straw. It made her smile.

“Excuse me, Miss?”

She looked up at the mall security guard that Tommy had been pointing out to those boys to make them leave. Her heart jumped, just a little. He was tall, with brown hair that had subtle red highlights, and his uniform fit well, showing off a body that seemed to reach out and grab Josie right behind her navel and make her tummy all warm.

‘Oh my God!’ Her whole body turned to jello. ‘He’s gorgeous!’

“Y... yes?” Her voice quavered. “Is something wrong?”

“No, not at all.” He smiled at her, and she melted a bit more. “I just wanted to apologize for not stepping in before. I wasn’t sure whether I should, and I probably let it go on for too long. When your friend arrived, he seemed to handle it okay, but I wanted to let you know that I was watching, and I would have gotten involved if it had gone on for too much longer.”

“Thank you,” she said softly.

“The thing is, you didn’t say anything, so I couldn’t tell if it was just teasing or harassment. If it happens again, don’t wait. Just call for help, and we’ll take care of it. No need to be embarrassed. That’s what we’re here for, after all. Okay?”

“I will.” Josie smiled up at him. “I promise.”

“All right, then. Have a great day!” He turned and walked back to his vantage point, giving Josie a long lingering view of his tight bottom that made her squirm in her seat.

“God, when did they start making mall security guys that look that good?”

Josie turned to see Jennifer Shea, Tommy’s girlfriend. She smiled, and Jennifer smiled back.

“I don’t know,” she replied, “but I sure hope they don’t change their minds before I’m old enough to snag one.”

“You’re Josie, right? Tommy’s friend?” Josie nodded, and Jennifer put her purse down on the table and sat in the chair next to her.

“And you must be Jennifer. Tommy’s here, somewhere. He went to get a Coke, but he’ll be right back.” She smiled. “He talks about you all the time, you know.”

“He’d better,” she said with a small laugh. “I’d like to think he can’t stop thinking about me when we’re apart, since that’s how I feel.”

“He was telling me how much he hates malls, but he knows you love shopping, so here he is. Just to make you happy.” Josie looked at her and smiled. “You have got to be the luckiest girl on the planet to have him in love with you.”

“I am,” Jennifer replied, her eyes narrowing. “So hands off, okay?”

Josie sat up. “What? I wouldn’t ... I couldn’t ...”

Jennifer threw her a grin and put her hand on the other girl’s arm. “Chill, girl. I’m just teasing. I know where his heart is, and I know you guys are friends. So no worries, ‘kay?”

Josie nodded, and smiled tentatively. There was a moment of silence, and Jennifer sighed.

“I really am sorry I freaked you out,” she said. “I should have guessed you wouldn’t know I was just fooling around. I know you haven’t been at this girl thing very long.”

“You do?” The other girl looked up, surprised. Jennifer gave Josie’s arm a squeeze.

“Of course,” she replied, “Tommy told me all about what happened the other night. No secret between us. In fact, I’d been hoping to meet you.”

“Oh?”

Jennifer nodded. “I’ve been thinking a lot about how hard this must be for you,” she said softly. “Finally telling everyone who you are inside, then trying to make up for all the time you pretended to be a boy. Tommy said you don’t have any sisters?”

“That’s right.” Josie picked up her drink and took a sip. “Just me, Mom and Daddy.”

“That means the only person you’ve got to teach you how to be a girl is your Mom. That’s got to be awkward.”

“Pretty much.” She sighed. “It’s been a long time since she was my age, so as much as I love her, her advice might be a little out of date.”

Jennifer went quiet for a moment, then said, “Wouldn’t you like some help from someone a little closer to your age?”

“That would be great,” Josie replied, a little sadly, “but finding someone who understands and wants to help? That’s going to be hard.”

“Not so hard,” Jennifer replied, and smiled. “You’re looking at her.”

Josie turned and looked at her, her eyes wide. “Really? You’d help me?”

“Well, I don’t have any sisters either,” she said, “and I’ve always wanted one. If you’re interested, that is?”

With a ear-piercing squeal, Josie jumped up and hugged the surprised Jennifer.

“Yes, yes, yes!” She hugged her again, and Jennifer hugged her back, as every eye in the food court focused on the pair. “Thank you, thank you thank you!”

“I see you’ve gotten past that whole ‘not calling attention to yourself’ thing,” Tommy said, standing a short distance away and watching it all with a grin. “Nice going, Jen! Did you teach her that?”

“It’s her first lesson in girlhood.” Jennifer took the Coke out of Tommy’s hand, put it on the table, and gave him a kiss. “We LIKE being noticed.”

“So I’ve noticed,” Tommy said, and kissed her back. “So you’re giving lessons now?”

“Only to my new sister,” Jen replied. “But judging by her reaction, I’m not sure how much I can teach her. I’ve never heard a more heartfelt ‘squeeeeee’ in my life.”

Josie blushed all over, and Tommy smiled.

“Love the hair,” Jennifer said, tilting her head to scope out Josie’s look. “A little, ummm ... straight, though.”

“That’s because I just got extensions.” Josie turned her head slightly to give the other girl a better look. “And since they’re new, I can’t wash them until tomorrow night.”

“They look really good. I wouldn’t have guessed. How long have you had them?”

“Just a day.”

“Well, we’ll go back to the salon for the first washing, so they can show you how to do it right.”

Jennifer gave a little finger twirl to Josie, and the other girl responded with a model’s spin and a small giggle. “Maybe we can get ‘em to give you a bit of curl after the shampoo, too. You need a little bounce and body, if they can manage it. Using a curling iron or hot rollers can be tricky, too.”

“Have you ever had extensions?”

“No, but I had a friend who did, and she had to be very careful ...”

Both girls sat back down at the table, and Tommy sat, too. He drank his soda quietly, watching the female bonding ritual with a silly grin on his face.

‘It’s almost worth going to the mall,’ he thought, ‘just to see these two together.’

Josie looked over and caught him grinning.

“What’s that smile for?” she said, and Jennifer looked over at him, too.

“Hey!” Tommy put down the Coke and raised both hands. “I told you before. I get my happiness where I can find it. Right now, I’ve got a large Coke, a comfy chair, and two pretty girls to look at. I’m good.”

“Well, don’t get too comfy, Mister Browder,” Jennifer said with a grin of her own. “Josie needs to learn the fine art of shopping, and we’re not leaving here until she’s mastered it. Okay?”

His smile dimmed a little, but only until he took another look at the expression on Josie’s face. Then it grew to a grin again.

“Sounds okay to me.” Tommy rose to his feet. “Just don’t expect me to learn anything. I’m just along to keep you two company. I didn’t sign up for girl lessons.”

“And I don’t plan on giving you any,” Jennifer replied, standing up and putting her arms around him. “I love you just the way you are.”

“Good to know,” Tommy whispered, just before she kissed him.

###

© 2010. Posted by the author.



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