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Chapter Five
When I finally realize that I am my good old Kendall Karcher self, I realize that my girlfriend has joined me in the shower.

“Isn't she something, that old Mother Palin?” I ask.

“Honey, you may not agree with Sarah Palin, but why call her names?”

“Oh,” I regained myself. “No... Lexi, I had a dream that Sarah Palin was ruler of heaven and earth.”

I told her about my dream but made no mention that I was Kim Kardashian in it. She thought it was amusing that the Tacoma drove itself because she was always ragging on me about my driving. She also thought it was neat that she could fix her makeup looking into the monitor but thought it was creepy that it knew all about you and could show you stark-naked.

“It was a trip, Lexi. I could actually tell the Tacoma where to proceed and I could take a short nap on my way there. It took some getting used to not having a steering wheel.”

“Oh, sweetie, knowing you, you could probably find something to occupy yourself with, not having a steering wheel in the way, and all.”

I didn't mention that, in the “dream” I was female, that I was wearing a skirt and I definitely did find something to do besides driving. I wonder if she'd get jealous if she found out that I was with another woman and the other woman was me? I cannot risk her finding that information.

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I am extremely lucky. I have a beautiful girlfriend who seems to be totally devoted to me. I'm totally devoted to her and I guess you could say that I love her. We've been talking marriage for about a year but neither she nor I can come to agreement on a date or location. Lexi wants to be married in her family church but I want to do it in Las Vegas.

To my way of reckoning, if we get married in her church, we still have to spring for a vacation of some sort that would serve as our honeymoon. We both love Las Vegas, so why not tie the knot there? We'd have her folks and mine there as our guests and all of our friends will jump at any opportunity for a road trip. It only takes six-hours, by car, from Finesse City and about forty-five minutes by plane.

Lexi's baptized name is Alexis Genevieve Atchenson. She is twenty-four years old and is the fulfillment of my dreams for my ideal life-mate. She and I am the same height and I'm only ten-pounds more in weight. She has gorgeous blonde hair and ocean-blue eyes. She is built like a brick house. She adores her parents and she says that they believe I am good for her.

We met at Finesse City Security although she had been working there many years before I joined the company. She's ten-years younger than me but she doesn't care when it comes to age. She says you're only as old as you feel and when I'm with her I feel like a teenager and not a thirty-four year old graphic designer wannabe.

Security had not been my original occupational goal but the economy forced me out of graphics and into a job where I could help people. I had just recently reached the position I currently serve, to train new hires to become successful Finesse City Security Officers. I have to admit that I kind of really do love my job.

Lexi left Finesse City Security last year to go back to school. She had been in the office and worked as a personnel specialist. She liked Finesse but she wanted to advance in the company but had hit the ceiling as far as promotions go. She could either marry one of the four old men or get one of them to adopt her. Adoption was out of the picture and she loves me.

She is a student at Finesse City State University and has a year until she graduates. She has often tempted me with the notion that when she graduates she can get a job anywhere we'd like to move. She says Vegas is at the top of her list and I'd be okay with that move too. Finesse City Security has a branch in Las Vegas and I have broached the idea of moving there to the old men. They say it is a definite possibility because they think highly of me as an officer and a man.

So, you know, Las Vegas may soon be Lexi and my new home. For now it's Finesse City, California. The only thing Finesse City has over Vegas is its beaches. There is Lake Las Vegas and Hoover Dam and such but I definitely dig Lexi in a bikini on Finesse Shores.

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I was just thinking. My last experience as Kim Kardashian was pretty interesting. It's been several weeks and nothing as happened of any sort as far as transformations go. It seems that every time I jump, I am her but in a different situation.

Most recently, I got as far as home and the shower, but what happens if I do not change back? I believe that I could live with the change and adapt to it, but am I dooming Kim to a life as me? How do I know if she is truly the person I am becoming? I know it says her name on my badge and I am, in the least, her twin if not her in actuality.

My head is spinning.

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Months pass and I do not change. For one thing, it has not been foggy. Also, I have not been to the park area that initiated my first melioration.

I am getting along well with Lexi. I love her so much I cannot put my feelings into words. We've come to an agreement on our wedding arrangements. We'll be married in Las Vegas but not in a cheep wedding chapel. We've made arrangements to have our wedding in a small Baptist Church far enough to be away from the Strip but close enough to our hotel to allow us quick access there.

Lexi has never been married but I have. I have a son and two daughters that live with their mother. I am in an amiable relation to my ex-wife and she allows me liberal visits with the children. My ex really didn't want to get married but she found me dressed in her things once and she went off on me like I was a tramp or something.

I've been a closeted crossdresser for as long as I can remember. I just try to forget about it but when I do it usually comes back with a vengeance. Don't get me wrong, I'm a man who loves being a man but I also like trying to experience what its like being a woman every once in a while. When I do it is head to toe, from the skin out.

I don't think I have a fetish. When I am dressed up I don't get a hard-on. You might think that's why guys dress up in feminine things, and some do, but not me. I tried, and I can't get even semi-erect. When my ex found me, she thought I was a real woman. What made her so mad was that she thought I was a floozy picking up on her man. When I finally convinced her that it was me, all she did was cry.

We tried to make our marriage work after that, but it was doomed to fail. I ceased dressing for the remaining year of our marriage but she couldn't cope and we parted as friends. The kids were really young and probably didn't know that their mother and I divorced because of my indiscretion. I have been in their lives without pause for the years that have separated me and my ex.

Lexi has no idea that I enjoy being a girl sometimes. I really don't want to lose her so I keep my other side in the closet. Now that I've had these two bouts being Kim Kardashian, I'm really, really wanting to dress up. It's a viscous circle and one I cannot allow to begin again.

God help me.

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It'll be two weeks when Lexi and I get married. She is so excited and I can't blame her because I'm excited too. We've got all the loose ends tightened. Everyone who promised to be there have their airline tickets in hand and their hotel rooms booked. Most are staying in the Bellagio which happens to be Lexi and my hotel too.

The flowers have been ordered. The minister is booked. Lexi has three attendants and one bridesmaid. There is a flower girl and a little boy ring bearer. My four best friends are planning a bachelor's party “Vegas has never seen before”. Matt Bender is my best man and he is the best man because he won the coin toss.

Olivia and Ralph Atchenson have welcomed me as their son and my parents adore Lexi. At dinner, Dad is saying “why didn't you pick her in the first place, Bub” while Mom pokes him in the side and is whispering “Lexi's sweet but so was Rachel, Bill.” I hear them and smile. I know that they love Lexi and they know that sometimes things just don't work out.

Still, it is two weeks before we become united as husband and wife and I am worried. I haven't seen hide nor hair of Kim Kardashian and I hope that she stays where she is until long after the wedding and our plans and our children and our plans for our lives have had a chance to be.

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I will work this week and on to Wednesday. On Thursday we will fly from Finesse City to the city of lights. We have one day to rest and enjoy the spa and then Lexi and I will be husband and wife.

What bugs the hell out of me right now is that I heard the weather forecast and it heralds a strong chance of fog.

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