Beware...The Creeper! by Lynceus

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Disclaimer: I make no claims to any character or image owned or under copyright by another party, nor do I intend on profiting in any way from their use.

Prologue-

It's been said that no story ever really ends. The corollary to this is that no story ever really begins, either. Take, for example, the bizarre fate of one Jack Ryder. It begins some time ago, with Gotham's most infamous criminal, The Joker.

Once known as Jack Napier (among other aliases), The Joker got his start as an enforcer for the Valestra family, who eventually decided to strike out on his own, adopting (albeit temporarily) the identity of The Red Hood.

His very first caper, however, stealing a secret formula from the Ace Chemical Company, ended in disaster, thanks to an encounter with The Batwoman. Shot by his own gang, he fell off a catwalk into a vat of 'chemical waste'. Ironically, it was Jack Ryder himself who later discovered the truth about those chemicals.

A secret government project known as Eleventh Hour, which had attempted to synthesize a variant of Rex Tyler's 'Miraclo', the chemical which allowed him to become the heroic Hourman, in order to create 'super soldiers', had failed to do anything more than poison it's test subjects, and so, Ace was contracted to dispose of the evidence.

Dumped into the company's waste vat, it should have been rendered inert. But instead, resurrected by the chemicals, Jack Napier was reborn as The Joker. Possessed of heightened strength and intellect, but driven into madness, The Joker began a seven year-long career of terror.

However, towards the end, Joker began to age rapidly, as the faux-Miraclo had greatly accelerated his metabolism. It is here that the story takes an even more shocking turn. Rather than allow his legacy to die, Joker stole experimental nanotechnology from S.T.A.R. Labs, as well as the captured effects of The Mad Hatter.

His final gambit was to use the nanotech to infect his loyal associate, Harleen Quinzel with his own mind and personality, thus creating the Second Joker (or, as he referred to her, the Extra Joker). In his final confrontation with The Batwoman, Joker was slain by his own successor, in an ironic punch line.

The new Joker escaped, and remained at large, until...

Chapter One: Man of the Hour

Jack smiled at his reflection in the mirror. “You still got it, Jack!” He was at the top of the world, and he knew it. His network show, 'You are Wrong!' was a network smash, and had been green-lighted for a second season. Even better, he'd just gotten the go-ahead on his newest project, a five-part series exploring the origins and mythology of The Joker.

He'd gotten the idea a few months back, after Joker's death. Sure, there was the so-called 'Copy Joker' running around, but though she was much easier on the eyes, she didn't seem to have the same flair that had made The Clown Prince of Crime so feared.

This was the perfect time, he figured, for a retrospective, while people still remembered the original. Of course the best he was saving for last; after having dated his camerawoman, Marion, for the past five months, he'd finally gotten her brother's (his boss, no less, Morgan Edge) blessing to propose to her. Which he was going to do tonight, during the shooting of the Ace Chemical segment for his Joker series!

Granted, he'd had some reservations about their relationship at first; Marion was fresh out of college, and he was twelve years older than she was. Hell, even without her being Morgan's little sister, he wouldn't have touched her. But then, while shooting on location, she cornered him, and let him know exactly how she felt.

“How the heck did I get so lucky?” Jack shook his head, grinning. Maybe there wasn't a magic formula that could make him younger, but Marion sure made him feel younger! Just then, he noticed the time. He wasn't going to get anything done if he was late!

-

Jack pulled up in front of the gates to the Ace Chemical plant. Marion was already waiting for him, tapping her foot impatiently next to a Galaxy Broadcasting van. He got out of his car and put his hands up. “I know, I know, Always Late Jack.”

She tried to look angry, but as he got closer, she ran up to him, putting her arms around his neck and giving him a kiss that pretty much said 'all is forgiven'. One thing that never failed to astound Jack was how tiny Marion was compared to himself; even now, as they kissed, her feet were just barely touching the ground!

“Jeez you two, are we gonna shoot this or not?” Rocky, the driver and sound guy, sounded annoyed, but Jack saw the bigger man grinning.

“Marion, honey, maybe we should get to work now?”

His girlfriend reluctantly let him go, and mock-pouted at him. “Work, work, work, that's all it ever is with you!” Even in coveralls and a Galaxy Broadcasting ballcap (or maybe because of them), Marion was incredibly cute. Especially when she pouted with those big brown eyes of hers, and her lower lip sticking out just a tiny bit.

He put his finger on her lips. “I got a surprise for you when we wrap up.”

She bounced up and down like a kid. “Ooh! I love surprises!”

“Ok ok, let's get to work.”

She laughed, giving him a thumbs up, and picked up her camera. She might be tiny, but there was no doubt Marion was a strong girl; there was a reason Jack didn't do his own camera work. Last time he tried, he'd nearly thrown his back out, and here was a girl all of 5' 1” hefting the equipment around like it was nothing!

Chuckling, Jack got his game face on. It was showtime!

-

“Hello ladies and gentlemen, this is Jack Ryder and welcome to the first in my five-part series on The Joker: Behind The Laughter. From his early days as an enforcer in the employ of the Valestra family, the so-called Jack Napier displayed a talent for brutality, but this was only the beginning. Here, in the old Ace Chemical plant, is where he was confronted by The Batwoman, just over seven years ago.” Ryder smiled for the camera, and Marion gave him a thumbs up. This was going to be gold!

“Conflict, a struggle, and a fall into a vat of chemicals, like the one below.” Ryder looked down from the catwalk. Hm, that was odd, he was told the plant had suspended operations, but sure enough, one of the vats below him was filled with an odd greenish-yellow liquid. There might be another story to be found here!

“Even Batwoman could not foresee the result; the chemicals transformed the former Red Hood. His skin became chalk-white, his hair turned green. Imbued with superhuman strength and insane intellect, his mind cracked, and he became the most terrifying menace this city has ever known.”

Just then, he heard a high-pitched cackle. No, it couldn't be! But sure enough, striding into view, was the so-called “Extra Joker”. The experimental nanites in Harleen Quinzel's body had taken years off of her age, as well as imbued her with superhuman abilities and the mind of the original Joker. She wore a purple suit, not unlike the Joker's classic look, but tailored to show off her athletic figure. She had cut her hair short, and dyed it green, with black streaks, and her eyes had turned completely black.

Even under the facepaint, her features would have been considered quite attractive, if not for the rictus-like grin and the look of madness about her. She laughed again. “Now what do we have here? Three little birds, trying to tell a story all backwards! I'm the only Joker now!”

Jack wanted nothing more than to run in terror, but Marion's safety was more important. “Rocky, get Marion out of here!”

The big sound man nodded, and unceremoniously picked up the smaller girl, who squeaked in protest, throwing her over one shoulder, camera and all. But as he turned, Jack noticed some of Joker's goon squad approaching.

Joker laughed. “Aw, isn't that nice? Trying to save the girl you love, eh, Jack? Why I bet she doesn't know about that ring in your pocket, and what a nice rock, too! But don't worry, I'm going to give you a nice honeymoon...to Hades!”

Jack rushed at the Joker. He hadn't fought seriously in years, but once upon a time, he'd been a Golden Gloves boxer. She was smaller than he was, superhuman strength or not, so maybe he could overpower her!

With inhuman agility, Joker evaded his punch, and all Jack got was a kick to the stomach for his trouble. “Now now, Jacky-boy! You need to relax, you haven't let me explain my plan yet!” She leaned against the railing in a provocative pose. “You see, all those years ago, that vat below was filled with, among other things, what was left of Batch 12, an attempt by the government to make Miraclo, the stuff that gave Hourman his powers! Nasty stuff, really. Now, since you wanted the full Joker experience, I thought, say, why don't I mix up another batch of nasty chemicals, and give you a nice flea bath! But you know, I couldn't find any Batch 12 anywhere! I was so disappointed! But then...a really nice man 'donated' something even better; Batch 13, just like Daddy Rex used to make!”

Jack could hear Marion screaming. He had to do something...but what?

-

Racing to the scene in the Batmobile, The Batwoman glanced at her passenger, Ricki Tyler, the Hourgirl. Or should she say, what was left of Rex Tyler himself. Batwoman hadn't believed Ricki's story at first, it was so incredible to imagine that the pretty young teenager was actually the original Hourman!

“You still don't believe me?” Hourgirl sighed. With her cowl removed, she looked all of an attractive 15, with short black hair and dark blue eyes. And it was seeing those eyes that had convinced Batwoman; they had seen far too much.

Just then, the onboard computer in the Batmobile received a transmission from the central mainframe. “If I didn't, you wouldn't be here. But it's always nice to get confirmation. Your DNA isn't an exact match, but even if you were Rex's daughter, it wouldn't be this close. So either you're telling the truth, or you're a clone.”

Hourgirl hugged her arms to her chest. “I wish I was a clone, I think this would be easier. All those years using Miraclo, I never even suspected what a massive concentration could do to someone. At first, I only dared use one 'Hour of Power' a day. Then it got to the point where I was so addicted that I'd only rest for an hour between doses. You can't imagine what it's like; to go from being a normal human to becoming a God.” She looked near tears. “I was such a fool.”

For all her intensity, Batwoman was still human, and her heart went out to the other hero. “Maybe you made bad choices, but you helped a lot of people...Rex.”

She smiled at him. “Rex Tyler is dead. The transformation was permanent. As the levels of Miraclo built up in my body, each subsequent dose was making me younger. Stronger. Like an idiot, I thought this was a good thing, until...”

“Extant. He was insane, a lot of people were going to die.”

She nodded. “Yeah. Don't get me wrong, I wouldn't have changed a thing. I mean, I figured I was going to die, burn out like Joker did. I was never so fast before; I imagined that was how Jay or Barry felt. Heck, Wally said he could barely keep up with me...Rex, that is. And I beat him...I saved everyone, but I felt my body burning up. Rather than make them see, I ran away as far as I could, and then...I died. Or at least, I thought I did. When I woke up later, I wasn't the same person anymore. Getting younger, I could see, but becoming a girl?” She chuckled ruefully.

“Let me guess. You used an estrogen-derivative to try and counter the side effects.”

“Hm, yes. Sorry, I keep forgetting; you're one of the few people who understands this stuff. I...lost a lot in my transformation. I couldn't whip up a batch of Miraclo if I tried. Years of advanced chemistry...gone.”

Batwoman couldn't imagine what that was like. To lose so much knowledge and experience! “I'm sorry.”

She shrugged. “It's for the best. My body naturally produces something similar now, at least, according to Doctor Mid-Nite. So I'm super all the time now. More or less.”

“You could have told me Doctor Mid-Nite knew about you. I could have talked to her, and sorted this out a lot quicker.”

Hourgirl shook her head. “If she knew I was here, she'd have tried to stop me. You see, when I'm stressed, the Miraclo builds up in my system, and I go into overdrive.”

“An 'Hour of Power'?”

“More like 'Five Minutes of Power'. And I'm as powerful as ever. But there's a price. Using my powers like that, I get a little bit younger each time. And the human body wasn't designed to do that; losing mass and height, that is. It puts tremendous stress on my body, and Dr. Mid-Nite thinks it will kill me. But Miraclo? In the hands of a Joker, any Joker? I refuse to let my legacy be misused like this!”

Batwoman nodded. “I understand. But try not to overdo it. Oh and Ricki...”

The younger girl nodded. “I know. After this, Hourgirl has to retire. Maybe for good. It might not be so bad, you know. Going back to school, a second chance at life. I just miss Wendi so much...”

Batwoman, in a rare gesture of compassion, reached out and squeezed Hourgirl's shoulder gently. “I'll help you any way I can. Money is no object. You're a hero, you deserve no less.”

She smiled. “Thank you, Batwoman.”

“Call me Katherine.”

Hourgirl gasped as she realized who Batwoman was. “Katherine Wayne? Bruce Wayne's sister?”

“I hope that can stay between us. Even though I'm his half-sister, he's still very protective of me. I'm sure he suspects, but as long as he doesn't know for sure...”

The younger girl laughed. “Oh yes, that's a good idea, betray the Batwoman. I can think of easier ways to commit suicide.”

Katherine Wayne (formerly Kane) smiled, a rare thing for her. At least, when she was in costume. Somehow, the persona of Batwoman changed her in ways she didn't fully understand. She immediately sobered, however. “We're here.”

Hourgirl pulled on her cowl. “Wait, what's that news van doing here?”

Batwoman scowled. “Ryder!”

-

Jack stayed quiet and still while the Joker ranted. Harleen hadn't been the most stable person before being 'infected' with the Joker's personality, and now? She was a raving lunatic. Cute one though...ugh. “Old habits die hard,” he muttered. A year ago, he'd been a real Casanova, a different beautiful woman each night. Marion had changed all that, and he wasn't about to let her get hurt.

Then he saw it. A lever on the catwalk labeled 'DANGER: Emergency Release'. Perfect. All he needed was a distraction...

There was an explosion as the metal doors of the chemical plant imploded. Joker gasped. “No, it can't be!” Sure enough, however, as the smoke cleared, the menacing (if sexy) figure of The Batwoman appeared, with a younger heroine at her side. It wasn't like Batwoman to work with a partner, and yet, for some reason, it seemed right, somehow. At least to Jack.

Then he recognized the colorful costume. Hourgirl?! What was she doing in...of course! The Miraclo! It had been invented by her father, after all.

“The Bat! Kill her! Kill her to death!”

Jack winced as he stood up. “Seriously? You're stealing Supergirl-Prime's dialog? You really are a pathetic knock-off. A cheap imitation.”

“...why...you...” Harleen's face contorted into a mask of twisted rage. She reached into her jacket and produced a gun with a large barrel. Jack recognized it. It fired small grenades, filled with either acid, or 'Joker gas'. Well, it wouldn't matter. He rushed in her direction, and she fired. Thick acrid yellow gas surrounded him.

Suddenly, it was hard to take anything seriously. He heard himself giggle like a schoolgirl. All he wanted to do was roll on the ground and laugh at how pointless it all was! But somehow, he managed to reach for Marion's engagement ring. Clenching it tightly, he hit the lever with his shoulder, and the catwalk lurched dangerously, sending him over the side. Below, the pool of chemicals...

“Marion, I love you!!!!” The last words of Jack Ryder as he fell to his death...

-

Only Joker's incredible agility saved her from sharing Jack Ryder's fate. She had to laugh; he'd sacrificed himself for his girlfriend! How stupid! How pointless! How romantic! Wait, what? She shook her head. Really, she wished the first Joker had thought his plan through more; some parts of Harley had survived. Kind of annoying, really.

With a mighty leap, she cleared the gap between sections of catwalk. “Aww, isn't that sweet, he loved you, little girl.” The irony that Harleen's body wasn't much taller made her laugh. But most things made her laugh. “I think you two should be together...forever!”

The big guy tried to fight her, but Joker effortlessly fended him off. She turned to the girl, only to get a right cross for her trouble. “Ow! Not funny, that hurt!” Joker staggered back a little. “You got one hell of a punch, little girl!”

Marion snarled. “You got one hell of a hard head, you bitch!”

“Oh that's it, you're going down, say hello to lover boy for me...when you get to Hell!” Joker reached for the little twit, only for a flying object to come between them. A Batarang. “You! It's always you!”

Hourgirl swooped down from the rafters. “Sorry to disappoint, it's just me. I sort of 'borrowed' the Batarang.”

“Great, now I'm being assaulted by Girl Wonders!” Joker reached for her gun. Screw this! “I'm afraid you both won't be so cute with acid in the face!”

A second Batarang hit the gun...from behind? Whirling, the Joker found herself confronted by the Dark Lady. She was cornered.

“It's over for you, Harleen!” Batwoman's voice lowered an octave, to frightening effect.

“There is no Harleen, there's only...ME!” Joker leaped onto the guard rail. “You think you've won, but Ryder's still dead! Or worse! Bye bye now!” She jumped off the catwalk, only to produce a trick umbrella she'd swiped from Penguin which greatly slowed her fall. She laughed then, unable to help it.

-

“Damn it. She got away...again!” Batwoman snarled in frustration.

“Jack, please, you have to save him!” Marion wailed.

Just then, another explosion rocked the building. With a silent nod to Batwoman, Hourgirl grabbed Marion and leaped down from the catwalk. Batwoman hefted Rocky as best she could, wishing she had super-strength, and not for the first time. “Hang on, big guy!” She fired her Batline and swung down to the floor.

They escaped with seconds to spare, before the building went up in a chemical blaze. Marion fell to the ground, weeping. The heroes had lost, and Jack Ryder was dead.

Chapter Two: A Creeper is Born!

Jack groaned. He felt like he'd been hit by the defensive line of the Gotham Knights! “Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow!” Weird, the explosion must have messed up his hearing, his voice sounded weird to him. Higher-pitched. Slowly, he managed to stand. “Woah...center of balance...way off!” He giggled. “Hm, since when do I giggle? Must be the aftereffects of Joker Gas! Joker Gas, Joker Gas, don't give me no sass, or I'll give you Joker Gas!”

Chuckling idly, Jack looked around. Hm, the beach? He wondered how he'd gotten here. Oh well, at least he wasn't seriously injured....then he took a look at his arm. His skin had taken on a slight yellowish tint. But that wasn't all, his arm looked, well, slender, even girlish, and his hand...

“Uh oh! I smell a trope! And it's not a good one!” Looking down, Jack noticed his clothing had been reduced to rags. Which meant he got a good look at his chest. Before his very eyes, small breasts were forming...and growing!

“Oh man, I gotta diet, I got MAN BOOBIES!” He put his hands on them. Hm, they actually felt pretty nice, swelling as if in reaction to his touch. Soon, he had what he reckoned was a nice C-cup. He squeezed them. There was a strange pressure in his groin, unfamiliar, yet pleasant.

“We interrupt this broadcast with a special report!” Jack reached into his oddly loose slacks. Something was definitely missing! His fingers found an opening that was...well, vaginal. And moist. “New Flash: It's Gone! What a revolting development, I'm a chick!”

He let his pants slide off his legs. Feeling his hips, they were definitely wider, at least compared to his slender waist, but it was obvious from how baggy the shreds of his clothing were that he'd also gotten smaller! “Jack Ryder 2.0, Ladies and Gentlemen! All girl and now fun-sized!” He started to giggle again. Well, she did.

Yes she, she was definitely now a she, not a he. Not even a he-she! Panic rose up in her chest, but was immediately quelled by an important question. “I wonder if I'm hot? Must find out!”

She stopped up short, and reached down for her pants. Not to put them on, what was the point? No, to get something important. The ring! “I wonder if I can get a refund. Not gonna need this now! Although...Marion did say she 'experimented' in college. Rawr!” She laughed again.

Then she was struck by a sense of total loss. The Joker. He'd threatened Marion. Tried to kill him. Stole his identity from him. And now...he'd lost Marion. Forever. “And so, the former Jack Ryder, transformed into a yellow-skinned freak girl, embarked on a roaring rampage of revenge! The Joker must die!” She sniffed the air. Ugh, what was that smell?

She sniffed her arm. Ew! “But first....a shower! And then...wardrobe!” Cackling like a loon, she bounded off into the night. She found she could leap amazing distances, imbued with strength and grace she'd never had before! Not to mention, she felt great, the exertion didn't tire her at all, but instead made her muscles pleasantly warm. “Feel the burn! Acid burn! Hahahahaha!”

-

Jack had to break into her apartment. Not that it was hard, she had been able to climb up the fire escape like it was a child's jungle gym! “Got to admit, love the powers, hate the gender flip!” Crawling into her window, she made her way to the bathroom, discarding the rags of her clothing. In the bathroom, he looked in the mirror, seeing a pretty girl in her late teens staring back at him. She had, as she'd previously noted, a faint yellowish skin-tone, and oddly green hair, that...was longer than before, falling to his shoulders. Her eyebrows were a slightly lighter shade of green, and her dark grey eyes looked a little bloodshot. “Well slap me with a brick and call me Shannon! I'm as cute as Marion!” She laughed a little, but the laughter soon turned into choked sobbing. “Why did this have to happen? Why? Why!?” She slammed her fist against the mirror, breaking it. “Ow, that hurts...wait, no it doesn't?” Looking at her hand, she saw blood appear (it was strangely dark orange in color), and then vanish, as the wound healed instantly.

“Ooh, no more papercuts! Shaving will be easy too...” Hm. Closer inspection proved that her body was free of hair, even the area between her legs was bare! “Silky smooth! Ok, shaving is out, unless I want to be bald...nah! The Lex Luthor look is out!”

She stepped into the shower and let the hot water flow over her. “I'm a babe. Hopefully legal, I'd hate to be arrested for looking at myself! Ha!” Hot stinging tears flowed with the water. “Joker...you took everything from me, everything! If only you hadn't been there and....wait a minute! Light bulb! How many Jokers does it take to ruin Jack's day? One! But...how did she know? I only just now got the green light, so...”

Her eyes narrowed. “Morgan Edge must die!”

-

The water in the bottom of the tub was yellowish, and fizzed slightly. Once she was clean, Jack stepped out of the shower. She sniffed her arm. “Ah, minty fresh! Irish Spring; it's what all yellow-skinned babes use! Okay, clothing!”

“Let's see...first off, what fits a girl? Hm, I'm taller than Marion, but maybe she left something here...” Rummaging in the drawer Marion used for her spare clothes, he found a sexy two-piece swimsuit. “Forest green so isn't your color, baby, but it sure is mine!” To her surprise, it fit rather well. “But wait, I can't go around like this, it's indecent!”

She dove into a closet. “There must be...ah ha!” She stepped out, producing a long red cloak with an attached hood. “I almost forgot about the time I got to play the Big Bad Wolf! Who would have thought Marion's roleplay fetish would pay off?” He tied the cloak around his neck and looked in the mirror. “Damn me, but I'm sexy!”

Again, that pain inside...no! Must focus. She took the ring, and slid it on her own finger. “Remember...what they did to me. To us.” After raiding the apartment for a few useful things, she started a fire. “Remember kids, only you can prevent forest fires...no, wait. Ha!” She picked up the phone, dialing emergency services.

“Gotham emergency services, what is the nature of your emergency?” To Jack's surprise, the voice on the other end was quite pleasant.

“Baby! Where have you been all my life? Did anyone ever tell you that you had a sexy voice?”

“Ma'am, you're tying up the line, please hang up.”

“Aww, ok, you don't want to chat, that's ok. But hey! There's a fire, like, right here, so you may want to put it out before anyone gets hurt. Save Mrs. Turlowski for last, believe me, she's meaner than the fire!”

“Please be advised if this is a prank...”

Jack laughed. “No no, the fire is real, I ought to know, I set it! Now send someone over here, pronto, thanks, love you, bye bye!” Jack made a kissing noise and left the apartment for the last time.

-

Jack's next stop was a local 24-hour 'superstore'. She hated these places, in fact, she'd just featured this one on her show last month. She'd miss her old job, but that too, was gone. Busting in, she kissed the old man working as a greeter. “Hello to you too, big boy!” Laughing hysterically, she walked into the store, grabbing whatever got her interest.

As for the poor greeter, he was seriously considering having a heart attack and dying happy.

“Let's see, ooh, gloves, gloves are good, and just in my color!” Jack picked up some green gloves and, grabbing a pair of pinking shears, snipped off the tips before sliding them on. “Purrfect! Now if only I had some claws!”

“I should probably give this whole underwear thing a shot, this swimsuit chafes me so!” She grabbed a pair of panties. “Ooh! White cotton! I've taken a lot of these off, but never put them on, ha ha!” After collecting a few more items (like some expensive athletic shoes), she broke into the dressing room.

A security guard came by, and attempted to get her out of there, but a slender arm reached out, grabbed his nightstick, and clonked him on the head with it. “Eek! No peeping! Nighty-night!”

The police arrived just as she was leaving the store, bags of groceries in hand. To her credit, she had attempted to pay, but the cashier just ran off, so Jack just left the money on the counter.

“Gotham P.D., freeze!”

“Freeze frame!” Jack froze in place.

The one cop looked at his partner. “You know, it's never this easy, especially with the freaks.”

“She doesn't look like much, kind of cute though.” His partner replied.

“Aww, you know, I'm flattered, really. But I'm just not that kind of girl! Actually, I'm not any kind of girl. But anyways, this yellow girl has no time to waste with the boys in blue!” She started to walk away.

“Halt or we'll shoot!”

In a single bound, Jack leaped up onto a lightpole, holding on with one hand effortlessly, the groceries held in her other arm. “You'd shoot poor little defenseless me?”

“Uh...yeah!”

“Well I only have one thing to say. WATERMELON!” She pitched the melon she'd bought at the larger of the two cops, who didn't move out of the way in time.

“Gah!” Was his only response as he fell down.

His partner turned to look. “Hey are you ok?”

“Forget me, get the girl!”

But when they turned back to look, she was gone, although they could hear mad laughter in the distance.

-

After leaving a traumatized Miss Edge and her driver for the police, Batwoman and Hourgirl returned to the Batcave. Neither one of them spoke on the trip back. As Batwoman exited the Batmobile, she sighed. “You can stay with me for now, until I can get your new identity prepared.”

“I'm sorry, Katherine. I screwed up.”

Batwoman removed her cowl, revealing the face of the most sought-after single woman in Gotham, Katherine Wayne. Still in her mid-twenties, she had long, raven-black hair, blue eyes, and luscious red lips. In fact, she bore a striking resemblance to Princess Diana of Themyscira, aka Wonder Woman, which others had often commented on. “You know, this is usually the part where I say something harsh.”

“This is why I work alone.” Hourgirl attempted to mimic the Dark Lady's low growl, then coughed. “Ah, guess I don't have the vocal chords for that.”

Katherine laughed. “It takes some practice, let me tell you. But seriously, if you hadn't have been there, I don't think we could have saved Miss Edge or the driver. I didn't even notice you take that Batarang.”

“Hey, I may not remember all of my education, but I do have experience at crime fighting.” Hourgirl removed her cowl.

Batwoman was struck by a sudden thought. “You know, thinking about that...”

Just then, the Batcomputer flared into life. “Criminal activity detected.”

“Hold that thought.” Batwoman went to the terminal, trailed by Hourgirl. Footage of the a yellow-skinned young woman appeared on the screen. “What do we have here?”

“I'm going to go with a fashion nightmare, that color scheme reminds me of Etrigan!”

Batwoman chuckled. “Still, I don't think she's a demon. Hm. Tore through the store, assaulted a security guard and a police officer...with a watermelon. But left money at the scene. Very odd.”

“Hey what's that?” Hourgirl pointed to a small red flashing light in the corner of the monitor's display.

Going to it, it expanded. “Fire at an apartment building...Jack Ryder's apartment building.”

Ricki gasped. “No, it couldn't be...”

“There's a 911 call.” Katherine played it back. “That doesn't sound like Miss Edge or Harleen. Who would want to set fire to Ryder's home?”

“I just had a very bad thought.”

Batwoman turned to face Hourgirl, whose face was pale. “I think I just had the same thought.”

“To the Batmobile?”

Batwoman nodded. Just then, Alfred came in. “Oh dear, and I just made something for you both to eat.”

“Pack us a lunch, Alfred, and some coffee. Looks like it's going to be an all-nighter.”

“When isn't it, Mistress Katherine?” The butler replied with a wry smirk.

-

There were many advantages to her condition, Jack conceded. She could put a spider monkey to shame with her gymnastic ability, and she could move with near total silence. She wondered how this mutation had come about; Miraclo could increase strength, speed, and stamina. Even let you think faster. And the original Joker had healed quickly as well, although it was due to an increased metabolism.

But the effects were supposed to be temporary. Well they hadn't for the Joker, which had Ryder a little worried. “Great, first I'm young again, but I'll be a senior citizen before I'm 40. Prune juice and shuffleboard, here I come!”

She clamped her hands over her mouth. So much for her stealth! But Kirk, the late-night security guard, was dozing lightly and didn't hear her. That was good, Jack liked Kirk, he was good people. She didn't want to hurt anyone, but nothing could get between her and Edge.

But the nature of her metamorphosis puzzled her. Yellow skin? Turning into a girl? What else had been in that vat? And why did she care? She crawled on all fours as she approached Morgan's office. He was working late, as usual. She slowly reached up and turned the doorknob, opening the door a crack.

“...I'm so sorry, Marion, I know how much you cared about him. Look, I'll be over shortly, ok? Just hang in there, kiddo. I know, I love you too, goodbye.”

Jack burst in. “Honey, I'm home!”

Morgan had a look of shock on his face. “Who...who are you? Get out of here!”

Jack noticed Morgan was reaching for the silent alarm. In a single bound, she jumped on his desk and grabbed him by the neck. “Go on, press the button. The beautiful, red, shiny, candy-like button! I'll snap your neck like a twig!”

Morgan wisely put his hands in the air. “Ok, ok. Whatever you want, I'm sure I can help you.”

“Help me? You? Help me?” Jack couldn't help herself, she cackled mirthlessly.

“Ahh! My ears, stop, it hurts!” Morgan winced.

“Ooh, interesting, I got some Black Canary in me! Might explain the yellow skin, huh? Morgan, Morgan, Morgan, you've been a naughty boy!” Jack leaned in close. “Why don't you tell her the truth, hmm? That you're not sorry Jack Ryder's dead at all?”

“I don't know what you mean! It was a tragedy!”

“Buzz! Wrong answer! That's strike one, and believe me, you don't want to strike out. Let's try it again.” Her voice lowered dangerously. “Why did you tell the Joker about Ryder visiting the chemical plant?!”

Morgan Edge was sweating. And he wasn't the kind of man who got nervous. He'd built Galaxy into a multi-billion dollar enterprise by playing hardball with some powerful people. But this freak of a girl, whoever she was, literally had him by the throat! “Ha, if I tell you, you'll just kill me!” He attempted some false bravado.

“Kill you? No, I won't do that. Scout's honor!” She raised her free hand, making the Boy Scout salute. “I was an Eagle Scout you know, so I wouldn't lie about that.”

Eagle Scout...no...that was impossible. But Ryder had been one. Morgan frowned. “Who are you?”

“You know, I have no idea. And that's your fault! Once I was popular, going places, I had it all, even the love of my life! But now I'm forced to creep around at the edges of society, a freak! A leaper...wait no, that's leper.” Inspiration struck her. “A....Creeper!”

“You sure look the part...urk!” Jack tightened her grip on Morgan's throat.

“Tell me. Now!”

“Fine, it doesn't matter now. Ryan was popular, but he was pissing people off. People who have a lot of money. You don't get to the top without making some promises. So he had to go, but I couldn't fire him, ratings were through the roof! I was trying to find a way to do it nicely, but then I found that he'd slimed his way into my little sister's panties! She's 22, for God's sake! I couldn't let her ruin her life chained down to that has-been! So I approved his silly Joker show, even told him I approved of him and Marion. It didn't matter, I'd told the Joker days ago, when the idea for a Joker show first hit my desk. Brilliant, wasn't it?”

The Creeper's eye twitched dangerously. “Morgan Edge, I respected you. I wanted to prove to you that I was worthy of Marion. I never led her on, she chose me, and God only knows why! I was the luckiest man alive, and you...you...” She couldn't trust herself to speak.

“...Ryder? No, it can't be...!”

“You better believe it is! This is what you did to me! Morgan, in your next life, remember this. If you want to kill a man, do it yourself. And make sure he doesn't come back to life as a superpowered freak-girl!”

“Wait! You said you wouldn't kill me!”

The Creeper smiled insanely. “Oooh, you're right. Sorry about that, old chum. Well I guess that's that, then. Give Marion my best.” The Creeper casually walked out of the office.

Morgan rubbed his throat and immediately called security. “Kirk, call the police, there's a dangerous lunatic roaming the offices! If you see a weird-looking girl, shoot her! No don't ask questions, that's an order!”

The plate glass window behind Morgan was supposed to be bulletproof; Morgan Edge made a lot of people unhappy. So when it was smashed in, all he could do was gape at the sight of The Creeper as she entered his office for a second time. “What's the matter, Morgan? Wondering about the glass? Well, I guess you should have watched my show about the glass company that installed it! It's fake, Morgan, just regular old glass! Ha ha!”

“You...you said you wouldn't...”

“Oh Morgan. I LIED.” With one arm, she grabbed Edge and hurled him out of the window. Conveniently, Morgan's own Jaguar broke his fall. “Ooh, that's GOTTA hurt!” Leaping down, she heard Morgan groan. “Still alive? Well I'll fix that...”

A Batarang struck Jack in the arm. “Ow, hey! Ooh, an official Batarang!” She picked it up. “Lightweight, durable, perfectly balanced. And yours for only 19.99 if you act now!”

The Batwoman frowned as she came to a stop, Hourgirl just behind her. “Who are you?”

“They call me...Yellow-Skinned Wacky Girl!” Creeper announced proudly, taking a heroic stance. “But I prefer....The Creeper!”

Hourgirl gasped. “That's Morgan Edge! Why would you attack him?”

“Why is a raven like a writing....no wait, that's not my line. What can I say, he destroyed my life, I thought turnabout was fair play!”

“My God, you really are Jack Ryder.” Batwoman couldn't believe it.

“Well if you knew, why did you ask? That's right, ladies and...uh, ladies. The new and improved Freakazoid! Madman! Uh....Creeper! Yes, that's right!”

“Ryder, the Miraclo did this to you. I can help.” Ricki moved closer to Jack, careful not to make any sudden moves.

“Help?! You can't turn me back, and you know it!”

Hourgirl blinked. “What...how do you...?”

The Creeper touched her nose. “Heightened sense of smell. Not good if you're wading through garbage, but great for smelling dirty rotten liars! Morgan did this to save his company! He ruined my life, and broke Marion's heart! And I'll NEVER forgive him!” She moved to hurl the Bataran, only for it to explode in her hand.

“Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, OW! That smarts!” The explosive shredded Creeper's glove and cut her arm badly. Dark-orange blood began to appear...and then vanish, as the wound healed within mere moments. “See? All better! Well ok, I guess Morgan lives for now. But nothing will keep me from him, nothing!”

“You're not going anywhere, Ryder.” Batwoman moved forward, only for the Creeper to grab her by the chest.

“Honk honk!” Ryder pushed Batwoman into Hourgirl, and bounded away, laughing into the night.

The two women picked themselves up. “You ok, Bats?”

Batwoman rubbed her breasts, which were bruised from Creeper's rough treatment. “That...was unpleasant. Come on, let's go.”

“What about Edge?”

“I'll call an ambulance. It's more than he deserves.”

Chapter Three: The Wild Card

Marion couldn't stop crying. It just wasn't fair! Jack...he'd died trying to protect her. She wished she were dead as well. What was the point of going on?

There was a knock at the door and she got up, opening it wide. “Morgan I'm glad you're...”

The Joker reached forward, joy buzzer in hand. With a single touch, Marion Edge blacked out.

-

Marion woke up, still in her nightgown, tied to a chair.

“Ah, our guest is awake at last!” Joker smiled. They were in an abandoned warehouse, one of many along the Gotham harbor. “I bet you're happy to see me!”

Marion spat at the other woman. “You monster!”

“Though she be but little, she is fierce! I like that in a girl! Now, I bet you're wondering why you're here. Well, it's simple. Morgan is a rich boy, and I know a secret. A secret he doesn't want you to hear. So I'm holding you for ransom!”

Marion was frightened, but she imagined what Jack would do. “Now that's what I call an original plan! Villain handbook page 6, am I right?”

Joker laughed. “Oh you are feisty! Now shut up, or I'll rip your face off!”

“How much?”

“Wah?”

“How much are you asking for? I know how much money Morgan has, and if it's too high, you'll just make him desperate. He has some powerful friends, you know.”

Joker waved the girl off. “Bah, I don't need his money. I'm doing this for another reason.”

Marion gasped. “What reason?”

Joker leaned in close, smiling. “For...the EVULZ!” She started to laugh wildly, holding her sides. “Here, I'll even tell you the truth! Do you know how I was ready for you? Hm? With that vat of chemicals just ready for poor old Jack?”

“...no...how?” Marion felt sick to her stomach. No, it couldn't be...

Just then, a large object landed near them. One of Joker's henchmen, out cold. A figure stepped out from the shadows. “I'll tell you why!”

Joker and Marion both gaped at the yellow-hued girl.

“Ah, I see you're speechless at my striking appearance! Permit me to introduce myself...I...am...THE CREEPER!”

“Well you're definitely a creep, that's for sure!” Joker produced her gun. “Eat acid...gas...I don't care!”

Creeper fell to all fours, leaping forward underneath the projectile, and slamming into Joker's legs. “Been there, done that!”

Joker fell to the ground, landing hard on her behind. “Damn it, whoever you are! You're dead!”

Creeper pounced on the fallen villain. “Yes. Yes I am. Dead that is. You made sure of that!” She punched the Joker. “You ruined everything!” Another punch. “You destroyed my happiness!”

A third punch. “And you made Marion cry!”

“Wait, stop! Who are you?” Marion cried out.

Creeper looked to her, with a look of pain...and longing? “No one. It's better that way. But I want you to know the truth. Your brother told the Joker about the show.”

“No! It can't be...why!?”

“He needed to get rid of Jack. He was making too many enemies. Besides...he never approved of...you two.”

“You're lying! You are!” Marion burst into tears, looking away. She felt her ropes loosen, and she looked up into the Creeper's eyes. So familiar...

“I wish I was. I wish this was all just a nightmare. But it's not. Here, this...this is yours.” The Creeper removed a ring from her finger and gave it to Marion.

She took it and stared blankly. Then she read the inscription. “To the most amazing woman in the world. -Jack.”

“He thought the world of you, but now he's gone. You have to move on, it's what he wants.”

She stood shakily. “Who are you?”

“I told you, no one.”

“Tell me! Tell me who you are! How do you know Jack?” Marion advanced on The Creeper, who backed away.

“It's...I can't! I'm sorry!” The Creeper started to cry.

Marion stopped just short of the golden-skinned girl. She reached up and touched The Creeper's cheek.

Despite herself, Jack didn't move away from the physical contact, instead, she leaned into it slightly. “Mare...”

“Jack. You're Jack.” Marion couldn't believe it. But she couldn't deny what her heart was telling her.

“I'm...so sorry.”

She reached up and put her arms around the taller girl and hugged her tightly. “Jack! Oh God, Jack, please, don't let this be a lie!”

The Creeper put her arms around Marion. “It should be. You don't deserve this truth. You deserve so much better. I mean...your brother betrayed us...and....look at me! I'm a freak!”

Marion kissed Jack then, who was stunned by the gesture. Pulling away, Marion looked into her lover's grey eyes. “Shut up. You're beautiful. And I don't care what you look like! I love you, Jack Ryder.”

“I...I love you too, Marion. More than anything...but...”

“Oh will you two give it a rest!”

The lovers looked to find the Joker standing, with a real gun in hand. “This is disgusting, I mean, you're both girls! Then again, that's kind of hot.” She fanned herself with a free hand. “I just got a great idea! You two can star in my first snuff film! Hahahaha!”

Joker fired, the bullet striking Marion in the back, through her abdomen, and into The Creeper. They both fell to the ground. “...Jack...love...you...”

Marion Edge's eyes closed.

Rising to her feet, The Creeper howled like a wounded animal. Her eyes turned red, she seemed to grow taller, even as she hunched forward. Her muscles expanded, veins popping out. Her teeth became fangs, and her fingernails turned into claws.

“Uh oh.” Joker gulped. “Let me guess, I'm boned, huh?”

“RRRRRAAAWWWRRR!!!!” The Creeper pounced on The Joker, slashing at her chest with sharpened nails, ripping away the fabric of her coat.

A Batarang struck The Creeper in the head, then exploded, knocking the mutant senseless. Joker immediately rose to her knees. “Batwoman! Thank Goodness! You have to help me! She's a lunatic!”

“Hourgirl, help the girl!” Batwoman barked out an order. Competent as always, Hourgirl bent over Marion.

“Medical kit.”

Batwoman tossed Hourgirl her utility belt. “Third compartment to the right of the belt buckle.”

Joker rose to her feet. “Welp, time to go...”

The Creeper grabbed her from behind, long nails at her throat. “Only place...you....are going...is...Hell!”

“Ryder! Don't do it! You're not a monster! If you kill Joker, what would Marion think?” Batwoman tried to reason with the mutated girl.

“I AM a monster! Marion is dead! Nothing matters anymore!”

“No! She's still alive, but barely. She needs medical attention!” Hourgirl announced.

“Mare...alive?” Creeper dropped Joker to the floor. “You have to save her! Please, I'll do anything!”

Batwoman produced some Bat-themed handcuffs and made sure Harleen wasn't going anywhere. “I know the best doctor in Gotham.”

-

When his parents had died, Bruce Wayne had considered revenge. He had the determination, the wealth, the means. But in the end, he couldn't do it. There were people important to him still. Fighting evil with evil wasn't the way. All of their lives, Thomas and Martha Wayne had used their talents and wealth to make Gotham better.

Well, he wasn't completely guilt-free. He had, after all, given into the violence, just once, to save the woman he loved. Andrea Beaumont...now Andrea Wayne, his wife. But from then on, he devoted himself to becoming a healer, like his father.

He had discovered his parents were complex people. He still didn't understand his Mother's affair, since she had loved her husband very much. But he hadn't let that interfere with his relationship with Katherine. She was his sister, and that was that.

And he tried to support her, even when she soon began making the same mistakes he once had. He still yearned for vengeance, and perhaps this was his greatest sin. He had done all he could to encourage Katherine to become The Batwoman. Many a time, after Alfred had given her an anesthetic, he'd come down to that blasted cavern beneath the Wayne Mansion, to heal his sister.

Each wound she took was a dagger to his heart, but this was her choice. He couldn't take it away from her. Maybe he didn't want to. Maybe he needed to know that someone was trying to bring justice to Gotham. He dreaded the day when she'd finally admit the truth to him. Because he didn't know what to say.

The phone rang, and he heard Andrea answer it. There was a gasp. “Bruce! Bruce, come here!”

-

Alfred led him down to the Batcave. At first, the two men were silent, but Alfred had served the family for a long time. And had earned the right to speak his mind. “Master Bruce...you can't let her keep doing this.”

“I know, Alfred. That's what I should do. Be a hypocrite and tell her that this is wrong, when my own heart wants to do what she's doing.”

“Master Bruce...she's come to you now. She needs your help...and your guidance.”

“And she'll get both. I...I'll try, Alfred. But I'm afraid we both have the same weakness.”

Alfred put his hand on Dr. Wayne's shoulder. “No. Never think of it as weakness, this sense of justice you both have. It kills me to see her hurt. To see the damage she's doing to herself. But at the same time, I'm so very proud of you both.”

“Thank you, old friend.”

Bruce entered the Batcave. He hated this place. And yet, it always felt strange to him. Like coming home. He should have destroyed it when he first found it, all those years ago. Instead, he showed it to Katherine. And the voice that called to him from the darkness, the voice he denied...it called to her.

And she answered.

Katherine rose. She was wearing her costume, the cowl down. “Bruce...I....I know you're disappointed, but...”

He didn't trust his heart. “Show me the patient.”

She winced at his tone. He'd have given anything not to hurt her. But he needed to be the Doctor now, he couldn't afford to be her brother.

-

Bruce was well aware of the yellow-skinned girl's presence. Like a barely-tame animal, she prowled at the edges of the surgical theater. His sister was so much like him; she'd thought of everything. In fact, he mused, this room was better stocked than the one he had at Gotham General. Some of the instruments had been designed by Dr. Mid-Nite, one of the very few people he could consider a colleague. The wound wasn't as bad as it had first appeared. Joker had missed the vital organs. But there was internal bleeding.

Alfred, having once been a medic, was a more than capable nurse, seeming to know what Bruce needed him to do. And so, the two operated in silence. Finally, after three grueling hours, Marion Edge's condition stabilized.

Wiping his brow, he felt that surge of joy, the sense that what he was doing was right and good. “She's going to make it.”

Four people clapping in unison may not seem like a standing ovation, but to Bruce Wayne, it was music to his ears.

-

“Katherine, I'm sorry I was short with you. The truth is...I know. I've always known.”

Kathy Wayne bit her lower lip. Something about her brother always made her feel like a child again. Like time had rolled back to the day she'd met her half-brother. Even then, he'd been so gentle, so kind. “Then...why didn't you stop me?”

Bruce sighed. “Because I think, deep down, this is what I wanted. I wanted to be what you are now, but I was a coward.”

“Bruce, you are the least cowardly person I know. And I know people like Superman personally!”

He smiled. “Still, I couldn't do this. But you can. And you've helped more people than I ever have. But it's killing you, Kathy, you know that.”

She nodded. “I...I have an idea. If you can put your faith in me a little longer.”

Bruce pulled his sister close. “I will never lose faith in you. Or the Batwoman.”

-

Jack Ryder sat alone with Marion. She held Marion's hand, weeping openly. Maybe it was the change in her hormones that let her be so open about her feelings? No, even were she still a man, she'd be crying. “Please be okay, Mare. Please.”

“why wouldn't I be..?” Marion mumbled.

“Mare?! Oh God, you're awake!”

“not so loud, I hurt everywhere.” Marion opened her eyes.

“sorry. Volume control sucks.”

“Shut up and kiss me.”

Jack Ryder, no, The Creeper, did just that.

-

“I don't know if we'll ever know exactly what other chemicals Joker exposed you to, but I have some good news, Jack.” Hourgirl sighed.

Jack shook her head. “Jackie. I know you can't make me a guy again.” Jackie had an arm around Marion's shoulders. Despite everything, she still wanted to share her life with Jackie, and as soon as Marion was cleared to go home, they would move in together.

“Your mutation is stable. It appears you have the metagene, but it was dormant, even recessive. The chemicals reacted with your body, causing the transformation. But it doesn't look like you'll have to worry about rapid aging. Probably the reverse.”

“Huh. Good thing I got a young girlfriend!” Jackie smiled, only to get punched in the arm. And then kissed. Life was good.

“Ah, yeah. I have to say, you're adapting better than I did.”

“Couldn't tell you why. Now that Morgan is in jail, and Marion is here to stay, I'm good. Though I do think my reporting career is shot, even if my girl is the new boss!”

“Have you given any thought to what you'll do now?” Batwoman made her presence known.

“Yeah, actually. Gotham's a big place, and I figured, if you didn't mind, I'd like to help keep it safe.” The Creeper announced.

“Can you support that decision, Miss Edge?”

Marion Edge smiled. “Yes. Yes I can. Oh and I do apologize for the way Galaxy has treated you, Batwoman...or should I say, Katherine. It stops now. I fully plan to support all of Gotham's heroes, from the police to the vigilantes.”

Funny how things work. Within 24 hours, Katherine had expanded the list of people that knew her secret from Alfred to...well Bruce already knew, but there were three others, and she'd have to tell Andrea as well. And Renee. That was something she wasn't looking forward to. Still...

“I never used to like others getting involved. I thought I could do this alone. But I can't, and I promised my brother I'd try to work with others. We're both pretty different, Jackie, but I'm willing to try.” Batwoman offered her hand, and the two shook on it.

Epilogue-

Later, Katherine and Ricki were alone in the Batcave. They were both worn out, but somehow, not yet tired. “Do you think Ryder was a good choice?”

Kathy sighed. “I don't know. She's more prone to chaos and violence. The public might think she's as bad as the criminals.”

“Seems to me, I remember a time when they thought that about you, too.” Ricki grinned.

“Don't remind me! Look....Ricki...I have something I need to talk to you about.”

“You're worried about my condition. Well, I have some good news. After studying Ryder, I think I have a way to counteract the Miraclo in my body to an extent, but it will leave me weaker than I am now. I'm still not sure how the stuff will affect my aging, but at least my powers won't kill me!”

Kathy nodded. “That is good news. And it makes this next part easier. I'd like to keep working together. I need someone I can trust, and you have more experience at this than I do.”

Ricki Tyler felt her jaw drop. “Wait...you...The Dark Lady...Miss 'I work alone'....trust me? And you want me to....be your sidekick?”

“I was thinking partner...”

Ricki grinned. “Yeah right, people will see us together, they won't see it that way. But...yes! Hell yes!”

The two shook on it.

“Officially, you'll be my ward. And I'll get you into a good school. Unofficially, well, we need a name for you.”

“Hm. How about Robin?”

“Ugh, what?! Batwoman and Robin? Are you serious?” Kathy winced. “I was thinking Nightwing.”

They argued about it for a bit, and in the end, they decided on Batgirl.