This just in! Cats are EVIL!

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This just in: Cats are EVIL! According to a rescent BBC news story, researchers at the University of Sussex have made new discoveries regarding the multitude of methods by which cats manipulate humans. For more on this story, see here.

This is not in reference to a certain manipulator in my household that likes to nibble on me while I try to sleep...

Comments

We have long suspected

that a certain cat is responsible for a large proportion of the mayhem that goes on in a certain author's world.

Susie

And do not forget

The valiant efforts of Lili to uncover Miss Bonsai's nefarious schemes!

Faraway

On rights of free advertisement:
Big Closet Top Shelf

Where you can fool around like you want to and most you get is some bemused good ribbing!

Faraway


On rights of free advertisement:
Big Closet Top Shelf

Where you can fool around like you want to and most you get is some bemused good ribbing!

NPRs Wait Wait, Don't Tell Me mentioned this a while back

manipulative, yes, but evil?

My cat Master and Mistress have instructed me to counter your claims vigorously. And just because they are actively trying to take over the World does not make them evil, just socially consciou.,

John in Wauweatosa

John in Wauwatosa

She looks very much like our Mistress Cally

She's a calico too and nearly all calicos are female, the few males are usually sterile.

And as to Ang and the bats or weevils, are you related to Emily Littela, Ang? -- see mid 1970s Saturday Night Live.

Cats rule dogs drool.

John in Wauwatosa

John in Wauwatosa

Dat goes for us, too!

Andrea Lena's picture

...we don't like it when youse guys say stuff like dat...

You'd be wise to remember dat henceforth....if you know what's good for you!

  

To be alive is to be vulnerable. Madeleine L'Engle
Love, Andrea Lena

Grey stripped kittens ...

seems appropriate for cats what is "some of da' boyz, if youz catch my drift." Built-in pinstripped suits!

John in Wauwatosa

John in Wauwatosa

Being Siciilan Tabbies from Joisey...

Andrea Lena's picture

...the big surprise is that they talk at all..usually they just...react!

She was born for all the wrong reasons but grew up for all the right ones.
Possa Dio riccamente vi benedica, tutto il mio amore, Andrea

  

To be alive is to be vulnerable. Madeleine L'Engle
Love, Andrea Lena

What can I say?

*Checks very thoroughly for any reflective surfaces, cameras, windows, spyglasses, photoes, freshly painted surfaces, nanites, magic wardens, ESP image projectors, periscopes, eyes, vantage points and the like on the floor, walls, and corners of the room. Checks for trap doors, hidden doors, cat doors. Checks the ceiling. Checks for the cat doors AGAIN. Checks the ceiling AGAIN. Gets critical success at Search Area check, and finds nothing. Carefully puts his hand behind his back. Utters in a calm voice that leaves no emotion shown, with a blank look on face, and puppet-like posture.*

I hear and obey, my Mistress.

*Behind his back, where no one can see, his fingers are crossed for a shortest of moments, when the post is being posted. Also, his back itches for real, to ensure empaths will not get wind of the depth of his deception. He leaves the place. Moments later, it is burnt down to a crisp.*

Faraway

On rights of free advertisement:
Big Closet Top Shelf

Where you can fool around like you want to and most you get is some bemused good ribbing!

Faraway


On rights of free advertisement:
Big Closet Top Shelf

Where you can fool around like you want to and most you get is some bemused good ribbing!

Truly Evil

littlerocksilver's picture

All animals exhibit a spectra of behavior; however, the only animal who is definitely evil through its willful action is man. Portia

Portia

Evil

In searching for a definition of same, I came up with a cat that used to reside with us. She weighed over 18 pounds the last time a vet had her on a scale. Her favorite thing was to jump from the bed to the top of the bedroom door. She would then target poor unsuspecting sleeping me, and launch herself to land right on my chest in the middle of the night.

Her other favorite passtime was to crawl between us at night and put her feet in my back, then extend her claws to get snoozing room.

We have always been told that cats would get revenge for being punished or mistreated. So we used the old recommended water gun trick to keep her from places she did not belong like kitchen counters and tables etc. Once she made the connection she took great pleasure in waiting for us to fall asleep, then biting toes for revenge. (This was a different cat BTW.)

Not all cats are evil...

There are rumours that one particular cat, living in Wales, has developed a knack for writing (well, dictating to his mistress),
but evidently doesn't know when to stop...
...with one particular story currently numbering over 800 chapters/episodes/parts...
...and showing no signs of stopping any time soon (not that we'd want him to! Besides which, he hasn't married off the protagonist yet...)
 
 
--Ben


This space intentionally left blank.

As the right side of the brain controls the left side of the body, then only left-handers are in their right mind!

Evil Shmeevil

laika's picture

The article makes it sound like cats calculatingly decide to change the pitch of their purring in order to "manipulate" their human companions. Couldn't it be that it just happens as their mood changes to one of expectation, a manifestation of their wants? The same thing could be said about human babies' cries, and thus babies are evil. I've had 3 kitty cats as an adult- Ratso Rizzo, Gojira + now Kiki, and they've been sweeter & more loving than my own human family (but then so have several of my houseplants). Had Gojira the longest, ten wonderful years, and when I'd get home from work and put her food down, she wouldn't even think about eating until she had a chance to hop up in my lap for a couple of minutes and told me how much she missed me. Hardly seems like the mentality of a cunning mercenary only interested in what she could get out of me. She loved her Mama. I've seen some aloof, snotty condescending cats; but luckily I've never had one. Nor do I believe they view themselves as "owning" their human family members- that's some serious projection, imbuing them with levels of abstract thought they just don't employ. I love cats! (Dogs are pretty great too...)
~~~mew, to coin an expression. Laika

.
"Government will only recognize 2 genders, male + female,
as assigned at birth-" (In his own words:)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C1lugbpMKDU