He started to think normally again and began mapping out possible escape options but he soon came to the crushing conclusion that there was none. He was in the middle of nowhere. He knew he had two impossible choices that he had to face. The first was to walk away from the blackmail and face the consequences of everybody knowing what had happened, who he was, and what he had done. The second choice was to avoid all of the shame, embarrassment, and pain in going home and start a new life as Dave’s girlfriend instead, to live life as a woman.

Just to think about the choices made him feel sick and nauseated. Both were equally frightening and complex. He could never feel sure that his family, friends, and the public would accept him after hearing his story if he walked away from the blackmail. He felt he could not face the life destroying results and he was unsure if the risk would be worth it. How could he possibly tell everyone that he had been leading a secret life with his sister’s ex-boyfriend?

He buried his face in his hands. It hurt his head to think about the penalties in revealing his true self. He felt certain that people would assume he was some sort of a freak who lied about everything and actually had a true homosexual relationship with Dave. He felt convinced that his mother and sister would never look at him the same again even if they tried to live normally. It just wasn’t that kind of society. However, the dreaded thought dawned upon him that everybody back home would eventually connect the dots. After all, he and Dave would eventually be classed as missing persons who supposedly ran away together. Speculation would certainly arise.