Having only just finished reading "Beach Head", I was surprised to have a sort "flashback", albeit a good one. :)

I now realize that prior to my coming out, in fact back in the 70's or early 80's I did not remember a single thing about being trans. At the time I was this aggressive, easily upset-able, angry male. It was only after my being sent to a psychologist over my depression and anger, and subsequently being put in an "Adult Survivors Of Sexual Abuse" group that it all began to come back to me, not in a single rush but a bit at a time.

First was my trying to reconcile why I had been named Gwen and why I liked that name so much. Looking back, it was a secret tip of my hat to the fact that I often felt I was somehow not where I should be; something was dreadfully wrong. It would be another 5 or so years until I understood what I was feeling, why, and began to formulate a plan of what I would do about it. During the late 80's and 90's I had no intention what so ever of becoming a woman, no matter how much I felt like one.

My stupid family could have just allowed me to slip a bit toward the center of the gender devide, and all would have been well.

I did not anticipate that a single chapter of someone's story would trigger all this in me.

Much peace

Gwendolyn