Spent time with my mother as her daughter today

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I have taken my mother away for a short holiday. Her man friend is ill and could not come. When I picked her up she suggested I take my bag that I keep my "stash" of clothes in. She wanted to see me dressed. After a hectic day yesterday, we had a slightly more relaxing day today.

I dressed at around 7pm. She wanted to see me without makeup. She could not believe the picture I have shown her, was of me. I put my wig on and then she started. She took a brush and gave me a fringe. Then she had me try on my other wig. She preferred my short one.

Never having a daughter, she happily shared what she knew of makeup. She did a lot of my makeup herself. She gave me a few spares and told me my red lipsticks were too dramatic. She told me I would be better off with soft pinks.

Then she asked if I wanted to go for a walk. We were both tired so we just had a short walk around the site we were staying on. She suggested we go and have a drink at the bar.
I am not ready for that yet. What was great was that we passed several people while we walked, I never got a double take from any. We were just two women taking a walk.

After we got back, we sat as mother and daughter and watched a film. I wish I could have done this years ago. I have changed back to guy mode now and I am about to go to bed. I would love a repeat but we are going home tomorrow.

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Comments

Acceptance

Donna T's picture

Acceptance is a wonderful thing.

Stay pretty.

Donna

Donna

It is Donna. My biggest

leeanna19's picture

It is Donna. My biggest regret is that I never told her sooner. While she was doing my eyebrows, I said. "I bet you never thought you'd be doing this a year ago."

She asked me why I don't dress every day while away. I told her the makeup takes me ages. She said I should just dress on my own and feel comfortable. She said I could dress at her house and go for walks. I think it is a little close to home. I am sure the neighbors would notice.

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Leeanna

good for you

Just drying my eyes after reading this, so wonderfull for you. On a sad note, carried out the interment for my old Mum the other day, wish I had been able to have a day like that with her. Thank you for sharing your happy day xxx

Sorry for your loss Heidi.

leeanna19's picture

Sorry for your loss Heidi.

Mine is 84. I have been telling her for years. Use it or lose it. She keeps active. If you saw her you would think she is 65 rather than coming up to 85. She bothers the doctors with every little ache and pain. Probably why she is still around. Her "boyfriend" is giving up currently. he is ill, and is refusing to do anything for himself.

She feels guilty about not living with him and taking care of him. If she did it would run her into the ground. At her age looking after herself takes most of her energy. She would be exhausted in a few days. He has plenty of money to pay for private care, he does but moans about them.

He told me that they had not changed his shirt for 3 days. He has a wardrobe full and they get him dressed in the morning. He has not asked them to change it, but complains to my mother that they have not?

Not sure if he is getting alzheimer's.

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Leeanna

Even just a little time ...

... spent looking the way you'd like to look can be special. Being able to do that with someone you care about can be wonderful! I'm so glad you got to spend time like that with your mother. :)

An evening to treasure

It doesn't matter how many years it took to get there, I'm sure it was worth the wait. It took me until my mid 30's, after I'd started my transition to get there with my mother and it still makes me very happy whenever I get a compliment about my appearance, and even more so when she says "my daughter" to other people.

Enjoy!

Alison

My mum met me in my late thirties

Angharad's picture

when she came to stay with me, she lived in Australia. A few years later I had to go and look after her for a while when she came out of hospital. One day I had to help her shower in her wet room, seeing as she was naked and I was likely to get wet as well, I stripped off. I was post op and she had only seen my 'old' body and that was years before. She simply looked at me and told me that I had a good pair of thighs. It was the first time I had seen my mum naked and it was the first time she had seen her daughter as such. I got on with all her friends. I was there several weeks and we went shopping several times and they treated me as her daughter. Sadly I lost her in 1999 but we did have some time together as mother and daughter.

Angharad

Thank you all for your kind

leeanna19's picture

Thank you all for your kind comments. She was very encouraging. She told me to dress more often when away from home. We looked around a couple of charity shops and she kept asking me if I wanted this or that. A little too loudly LOL. I dress in dark colours and do not have many clothes. She told me I need brighter clothing.

That short walk with her was so nice. Just "passing". I am still too nervous to go inside anywhere busy though. Perhaps somewhere more accepting like Brighton.

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Leeanna