I am so messed up

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I got more triggered by a sweet romantic story than by a story about the sexual abuse of a child.

sighs, I am so messed up ...

Comments

I don't think that is messed up

I think deep down we all yearn for romance and love. It's deeply emotional, and I believe when we do that, then we open up ourselves and become emotionally vulnerable. So... while it may seem cold, I believe it is in fact not.
So I would not worry about that but hope you can relearn to open up without fear. :)

Many hugs,

Saphira

--
>> There is not one single truth out there. <<

Shielding

Erisian's picture

I don't think that means you're messed up. When reading something like about the abuse of a child mental shielding can go up in the reader to keep that safe spectator distance - unless the writing manages to persuade them to lower those defenses and hit them in the feels anyway. A sweet romantic story wouldn't trigger those defenses and thus could more easily pull strong reactions. The skills of the author in the writing will have a lot to do with whether a story can wiggle its way in to trigger major reactions in the reader.

I'm not sure what it's like to be triggered.

Patricia Marie Allen's picture

Since I don't have anything traumatic in my past, I can't really appreciate what it means to be triggered.

But since I've begun HRT, my natural bent toward tears in schmaltzy situations has been amplified. I've always tended to cry at weddings, more so than at funerals. But now... I was reading the voters pamphlet and one woman candidate said she'd been married to her husband since 1978, I did the quick calculation and converted that to 42 years. For no reason at all I was touched and had to blink back tears.

Not that that's anything like being triggered, but it's possible that HRT may be bringing your emotions closer to the surface making it easier to trigger on inconsequential things.

Hugs
Patricia

Happiness is being all dressed up and HAVING some place to go.
Semper in femineo gerunt
Ich bin eine Mann