I have an issue with my story that im not sure how to solve

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I wanted to tell two paralell stories and I tried that in the first version and it ended up to become a mess that many readers told me that it confused them.
So im considering tell them in two separate separate tales with two different titles of a dark edwyn and a good edwyn thats allied with the light
But it will still be about the same story, just with different situations and outcomes. The dark edwyn allied with the dark forces of the universe will be cruel, and treat his family vastly different than the one im writing now. It probably wont be very popular but it may be fun to write especially considering how heartless his family really is and he has to be practically allied with heaen to change them lol.
They really deserve the dark
but my issue is its the same story, just a different situation. but I guess I may as well
unless anyone has a different option

Comments

find a way to allow them to

Aylesea Malcolm's picture

find a way to allow them to overlap, like key words that link places and things.

I’ve worked on a similar idea with a dark-light-and neutral character telling the same story from different perspectives.

Famous examples

Charles Dickens' 'Scrooge' and Frank Capra's 'It's a Wonderful Life' comes to mind where a spirit or angel narrates the differences.

These type of what I would call dual or soup stories

Are complicated in general.
Very & I do mean very few independent writers, have succeeded in this form of storytelling, themselves
SaraUK, being one of them ('You got it all wrong' universe)
The thing that made them hold together & stay fetching while holding on to the author's attention if by my own personal view, was the overlappings.
You did great with the overlapping in the previous version of your original 'the prophet'
Yes, we have spoken about this, and yes it does get a tad confusing at times, but do not beat yourself up about it, everyone has something in their stories that are less then easily comprehendable.
You are in a sense fixing it, with a greater more enriched revision, in these revised editions of 'the prophet'
I may not be at my right mind latelly, but you know I am here for you, I will help you as I can.
I have 1 similar but different story (we discussed this one before) and I am still working on all the foundations, platforms, charactorials, location details, demographics etc before I even begin writing the actual story.... then if something gets added n out of no where I update my records in the corresponding files (plural & well organized) this includes, backstories, bibliographies, sumaries, map pictures etc... You ought to know by now that I tend to go all in & never do anything half-fast.

-Take & update your notes and story arches
-Always go over your notes, before, during & after to make sure nothing is not as desired.
-Plan ahead (1-5 submissions ahead of current submitted) whether the actual story or just the details to the next submission
- The more complex the story, the more planning, preplanning, etc is drastically needed

In my opinion your doing quite fine, I am actaully preferring your revised edition much more, it is actually really showing your best qualities as a writer & this fresher version is much richer

Amelia Rosewood Year two.png

With Love and Light, and Smiles so Bright!

Erin Amelia Fletcher