bad head place

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Firstly I should apologise for another whiney post - I'm not in a good place in my head this week.

I guess it's largely my own fault, decisions i've made that have maybe not been the best choices. Every time I think i've got my head and life together another spanner falls into the works and i'm not even back to where I started. Effectively i'm bankrupt - no regular income and bills that need paying has become a repeating cycle of worry.

As many of you will know, when I lost my job 2.5 years ago I decided to try my hand at full time writer. For two years I got by on the proceeds of that but for whatever reason the last six months have not been so good. Whilst my needs aren't huge there are months where I've barely covered the rent and bills.

I don't live extravagantly, I don't drive or smoke and rarely drink outside of the few social outings I make. It's looking like i've come to the end of the line as an independent earner and i'll have to look for paid work in a 9 to 5.

It's been made worse by some long term commitments (last weeks trip for example) that have further strained finances. I don't even know why i'm posting this, i'm not looking for sympathy or anything, I guess I just need to get it off my chest.

I suppose i've now come to a complete impasse. I run out of funds next week, not exactly sure what I can do about it.

That's it, off my chest, guess i should make a pot of coffee and try to get some writing done.

Sorry for unburdening
Mads

Comments

Madeline Bell at Amazon

erin's picture

Here are some of Maddy's books listed on Amazon: https://amzn.to/2A7ZZU3

Hugs,
Erin

= Give everyone the benefit of the doubt because certainty is a fragile thing that can be shattered by one overlooked fact.

thanks Erin

Maddy Bell's picture

Of course any purchases through that link will also aid BC in its ongoing funding travails.

Oh and I have managed another Gaby chapter today - only 8 more to complete the book!

If anyone has any insider information about London, Ontario it might be useful for the upcoming chapters!

Cheers
Maddy


image7.1.jpg    

Madeline Anafrid Bell

Central London, UK, is...

...almost but not quite unlike central Moscow. Huge crowds of people with streets that are 3 to 7 times more narrow, than in Moscow.
London, Ontario... Will be a most terribly boring place after Gaby's exchange visit to the US. If you look it up on Wikipedia, it is so boring that apart from a church, every picture is about roads out of that place...

Maddy

You're a tremendous writer.

You decided to chase a dream.

It didn't work out financially.

It happens all the time.

Writing is a business and most businesses quickly fail.

Very few fiction writers make a living. Several years ago I heard the number was 2,500. It could be double that and the odds would still be high against you given the millions of people trying to write fiction.

Don't beat yourself up for trying. Pity those who don't.

I've made a bit of money over the years. About half the businesses I started failed. It happens.

My guess is that most of those who are a commercial success -- aren't half as good at writing as you are. For example -- SandyThomas. A lot of what she publishes isn't half as imaginative and humorous as your work. Yet -- she seemingly has made a go of it through diligent marketing.

Feel good about all you have accomplished.

Jill

Angela Rasch (Jill M I)

Not done bad

Podracer's picture

in what is inarguably a small market, and your writing is stands out in it . It isn't mass sales though.
I had a look through for the earlier titles, note for anyone searching Lulu or Amazon many titles are under Madeline Bell, not Maddy.

Teri Ann
"Reach for the sun."

Like somebody else said...

Mantori's picture

... Been there done that...

Not the full time writer thingy(although I did publish a book of poetry in 2002, did not do well, TG poetry seems to be above most people's understanding, writing about suicide put most people off to I suppose) but I was a successful lecturer at colleges, between 1997 and 2007, but ended up in an armed robbery where horrible shit was done to me... Have not really recovered from that and it is 10 years later... I struggle daily to survive physically, but mostly emotionally and the one thing that keeps me alive, no let us say 2 things, are the TG stories on this site I have not read yet, and the Japanese anime I have not seen yet(I have watched plus minus 1500 anime series and movies in Japanese, I almost understand Japanese by now fully... Ha, ha, ha...).

So the point is, keep on writing because stories like yours are sometimes one of two things that keep people alive...
And THANK YOU and the other writers on here for the lifesaving writing that YOU do.

Mantori.

"Life in general is a fuck up,
but it is the rare moments of beauty and peace
in between the chaos,
That makes it worth living."
- Tertia Hill