Much to my astonishment, Storysite.org is still open! I first published there in 2001 or before as Credence Brown. I found one of my original stories there called "Swan Song". It is about a page. I remember it as a True Story and it answers a question for me. I had long ago forgotten about it, and at times now, sometimes I feel guilty for trying to be a woman now.
Read a story on KGW News Internet. It seems that the VA will start doing Sex Change Surgeries. I wonder if they will farm them out to a huge hospital next door? In 2007 I had to pay for my own.
I am grateful to have been at this site for just yonks. My stories have been reasonably well received, thank you very much. No one has chided me for not being the most clever writer, so I feel secure and happy.
Hoping this is all due to inactivity caused by Covid precautions. Out walking makes me feel exhausted, and my BP, Blood Sugar, and Oxy are all showing borderline. I lost 45lbs this winter. I have not been able to get in touch with the Doctor yet. I'll try real hard tomorrow.
I value you all. Please, no emotional emails or phone calls. I've been a snot at times but you loved me anyhow.
I've had a couple complaints about the Editing on this story. Since it is short, I'll just fix it online. I should have given it one more read before I published it. Sorry.
I don't know how I got on this wonderful story. It was written some 12 years ago. Frankly I usually avoid her stories because they always seem to make a sobbing mess out of me. I'm about half finished with it and it is wonderful.
It will be worth your time to read this.
So the VA Caregiver seems anxious to get me on Psych Drugs again. It is chilling. They talk about Borderline Personality Disorder. They have grown so condemning and intransigent that I use a private provider when I can. My private Psychological Nurse Practitioner seems more up to date and we've developed the idea that whatever personality problems I have come from Childhood abuse. The VA is very concerned that I not own a gun, and that is confusing since I have no history of violence, and was Military Police in the Army. If I had a broken arm, I would take that to the VA.
I have considered using Grammarly but do not wish to be drawn into something that might steal my ideas, or milk me for more money than is reasonable. Does anyone have experience with them?
I watched "Deep Impact" last night and found it so moving that I deeply wept until I thought I might pass on. I finally consoled myself sufficiently to gain some dignity back. I doubt that the movie will get awards but parts of it touched on things that inflamed Abandonment Issues and other things.
I've seen a few movies that carry the story to a sort of conclusion, but as I think about them, I have seen no sequels. I am very unfamiliar with so called "Fan Fic", so know nothing of the danger areas. Most certainly, I do not want to get anyone into trouble.
The recent news about T folk laws... I am frightened.
It seems that I have never understood being Transgender. Lately, in my reflections it seems clear that as a child I was very mild. The constant violence and hate I faced then caused me to fear and mistrust males, perhaps even hating them. I saw that my older stepsister was treated well and got to wear pretty clothes. I wanted to be treated nice like her. Did I feel like a female? Who knows, it is doubtful.
Perhaps I do not know what Transgender folk feel?
BBC has a story on that is quite heartening. "The Pre-Colonial Genders We Don't Talk About". It is toward the bottom of the Internet page and shows that Cross Gender, Third Gender, or Two Spirit behavior has been with us for a very long time. It is a very interesting article and encourages me in the idea that there is hope.
I'm reading "No Half Measures" and am almost finished. It is a very good story.
I notice that if I pause reading for more than a minute or two, the page freezes. It could be my Computer. It is aging and I'm getting ready to get another one. It runs on Win 10, and we all know that I am most certainly no Geek.
I am wondering if the issue has something to do with where the story is stored?
Being a total recluse only partly because of Covid 19, I just find things to do that are pleasing to me. I write a fair amount of the time but most of that will never be seen by others. Lately I've been thinking about Art. Not the style of famous people, but most likely Native American Navajo and Shawnee Art. I have some plasticized art paper and I don't even know which side gets the art. I started to use colored markers but the fumes from them almost put me in a Coffin. So, now I have some Acrylics and have no idea what to do with them, or what side of the paper they go on either.
I only just finished "The Princess Trap" and loved it so much! I returned to it to see if the Author had done more, and much to my astonishment found that Tyrone Slothrop and Wanda Cunningham had published it. Then I found out that the story had been on Kindle for a while.
I just finished reading "Legacy of the Anari", again. Looking back on things written about this Author, it seems they have been adequately admired. It seems that they were moving South, but that is the latest entry I see about them. Apparently there was intention to write more but it seems that it did not get to BCTS. Sad that.
I've had both vaccine shots and nearly a month after the second one, I'm still very ill at times. Last night, I finally went to the VA and they said that they are tracking these episodes. Will it all be over soon? I hope so.
I used to be a devoted Flight Sim pilot. Then the whole thing imploded and it was gone.
Now it seems that a new version is trying to learn to walk. I have a second computer with two Monitors. It is an i3, and reading all the specks, it will never work. Technology has moved at light speed.
I do not like the very aggressive and bloody video games. They are a huge turn off for me.
I had read, or heard someone say that Transgender folk have a high incidence of Autism or something on the Spectrum, but I know a woman that spent many years working with the folk and she does not see the connection.
Then I was reading on the internet and it seems to be a popular idea among PhD. Psych. folk that Transgender folk have a predominance of three serious personality disorders; Paranoid PD, avoidant PDs, and comorbid PDs. Someone else indicated that many were Borderline Personality.
I've had new contact with my estranged Son, something I had given up on. He first emailed me, saying he was thinking of me, and tried to talk about my living in sexual sin. Sorry to drop the Religion Bomb on you, but I shared Matt 19:12 and Isaiah 56:4-5 with him, and later I got an email from him asking for my forgiveness.
He can't speak a sentence without using Scripture or mentioning God.
I'm very thankful but I do not plan on a deep relationship.
Those sworn to defend the world, no matter their country or loyalties, watched, completely confused, as a tube shaped object accelerated, completely out of the atmosphere. A scrambled fighter, one of several fired a missile at the object, but it was far too slow.
Humans had assumed the visitors to be hostile, but the truth was something they could not understand.
President Elect Joe Biden is planning to nominate Dr. Rachael Levine as HHS Secretary. I wish them the best, though I think that some will fight this. She is Transgendered.
Lots of us are in the same boat here. I am sorry to be whiney. I started Isolating about the first of March and it is getting old, really old. I am very lonely. I get all masked up and go grocery shopping about every 10 days and that's it. I've seen two ads about people over 50 getting together but that will have to wait until after the second vaccine.
Due to Covid 19, I haven't been out more than once a week, to avoid it, and that is since January. Life is just really strange right now. I've been doing my best to keep distracted and calm, though the VA is anxious to get me on Psychotropic drugs. I doubt that I shall follow their wishes.
It's been two weeks since I've gotten groceries. I had to go, or the specter of starvation might overcome me. Since the stimulus there was money to shop. I was poking about for some eggs and then I spotted those precooked pasta. These had shrimp and lobster inside. I reached round a Native looking man to get some. Later we looked through the Cereal together. Then I noticed Watermelon Juice. So did he. A frision began to steal its way through my innermost parts. Later, at the check stand, he was behind me. What would I do about my vow to finish my life alone?
Checks can be made out & sent to:
Joyce Melton
1001 Third St.
Space 80
Calimesa, CA 92320
USA
Note: $6000 is the operating, maintenance and upgrade budget. Amounts received in excess of the $6000 will be applied to long term debt accrued over the last 19 years.
