Games Even the mighty like to play. When genies play games, the objects of their attention must learn the rules. And fast.

In the unreachable void, beyond the limits of space and time, lies the Unbuilt City, which exists without ever having been made. Unconfined by the cramped boundaries of infinity, eternal towers rise beside crystal lakes. A galaxy of stars could not power one of those towers, yet their lights blaze with unimaginable fury.

The unseen residents know fear. Beings far mightier than even their impossible city can bear move among them. Five genies, each one capable of making and razing a universe on a whim, meet.

"Hey, I saw that. Get a fresh chip, don't double dip. The rest of us want some too."

"What're you talking about? It wasn't me."

"Not again. How about we get this party started before these two get even pettier?"

"This I don't need. How about a game to start off? Shall we play for the usual stakes?"

"Now you're talking my language. Let's get down to brass tacks. Rules?"

---

The sun was not even thinking of waking up when Jake pulled into Starbucks, bitter that he had to be up so early. He got out of his junker, slammed the door, and stomped his way through the darkness. He had two green shirts stuffed hastily into a bag, but he wore the black tee shirt he threw on for setting up the shop.

"Grmbr crsh mrr," he muttered under his breath as he unlocked the door. People shouldn't have to work so early. Especially him.

The counter wasn't set up and the floor was dirty. Jake's already bad mood took a nose dive. He'd get all the blame if anything wasn't clean when they opened, even though it wasn't his fault. The idiots who worked the night shift were supposed to clean up before they closed. Not that the facts ever stopped anyone from blaming him.

He turned the radio to a good station, not the stuff they played during the day, got the mop out of the closet and plopped it on the floor. Grumbling at this waste of time he pushed the mop back and forth.

Two years of college had come to a crashing end when his lousy history professor refused accept his term paper just because it was two weeks late. Of course, he'd racked up thousands of dollars in debt in those years and now had nothing to show for it.

He'd applied to work as a bank teller, an office manager, even a paralegal - whatever that was. None of them wanted to hire a college dropout, so he wound up stuck on the hellish morning shift at the stupid coffee shop. He just knew all the customers were laughing at how superior they were.

Sloshing the mop around just enough that he could point to the floor and say he'd done it allowed him to finish quickly. His anger kept him company.

Unfortunately, he finished his half-assed mopping before anyone else was in to see him working. As usual.

Shelley and Allison should have been in by now, but they were always late. The boss liked them; Shelly was gorgeous and Allison was probably screwing him. Just yesterday Allison finished the milk off and didn't bother to get a new bottle out. He had to get more for his customer and held up the line. Of course he got blamed for her not doing her job right.

He wiped down the front of the machines and checked that the water purifiers were working. A bitchy customer complained about the water last week and the boss dinged him for it even though it was Allison who served her.

The syrup bottles were sticky, so he ran a cloth over the top of them.

"I say, it's about bleeding time."

"What?" Jake yelled as he spun around. "How'd you get in? We're not open yet." He must have unlocked the door when he got in. Stupid door should have a better design, like you can only fully unlock it from inside. At least no one was around to blame him for it and this guy didn't look dangerous. Maybe Jake could give him a cup of coffee and he'd go away.

The man was tall and thin and wore a bespoke suit. He had a yellow and red silk tie, a bowler hat, and thin wire frame glasses. His short cut hair was brown, but his eyes were a blazing bright gold. They almost glowed.

"I did not walk in, young man," the interloper answered testily. "You summoned me. I can not believe how long it took for someone to rub my bottle. Don't you people clean?"

Jake reconsidered. The guy had nice clothes but it sounded like he was crazy. He lifted the bottle threateningly, figuring it was the best weapon at hand.

"Yes, that's the one," the man said while carefully polishing his glasses.

"Uh," Jake responded, puzzled. He needed to get rid of this jerk before anyone else got there.

"Yes, yes, I see it. You have my bottle. You summoned me. Tch. Vanilla syrup. No cheating, indeed," he muttered sotto voce. "I was aiming for a bar. Drunks are so much easier to please. I bet this isn't even New Orleans," he challenged.

"Well, uh, no," Jake admitted. "We're in Georgia. Atlanta. Well, Decatur."

"Decatur," the man said with a wan smile. "How... nice."

"Look," Jake said forcefully, "you can't be here. You can come back in an hour when we're open. I don't want to have to call the police." He really didn't. He'd get blamed for all the trouble. "So how about I give you some coffee and you leave?"

"How did you people ever manage to win the Revolution? Surely not everyone is so slow. Dear boy," he said while pulling out a chair and taking a seat, "I did not enter and have no intention of leaving. I am Montague Willard Drussard III, and I am a genie. You summoned me."

Jake stared at him. He didn't need the cops, he needed an ambulance. This guy belonged in the nut house.

"A genie?" he finally asked. "Like a three wishes genie?"

"Just like that."

"Then I'm your master?" he asked. Maybe he could command the clown to leave.

"Please. Your people fought a war over slavery and mine were against it long before the colonies. I am a genie and I will grant your wishes. I think that is quite sufficient, don't you?"

"Prove it," Jake challenged.

"No," the genie replied unruffled.

"But, I mean--"

"I have no intention of giving a free sample. You may believe me or not, the results will be the same. But first, the rules of the game..."

Maybe if he played along the man would leave. "Yeah, I know. Three wishes, can't wish for true love or to kill someone--"

"Nonsense. Both of those are well within my abilities and I've granted them many times. No, in this case there are, shall we say, additional qualifications."

"What?"

"Extra rules. Conditions. Things you need to know."

"No, no. I got that," the boy said with little patience. "I meant, what are they?" He hated it when people talked down to him.

"So, you're not as slow as you let on." The genie stood up and paced about the room. "You have three wishes and must wish them all before I grant any of them. I will grant two of your wishes as stated, but I will choose one and grant its opposite."

"I've never heard of that before."

"I've never done it before. I am doing it this time."

"But I thought... In all the stories you just grant the wishes--" he complained.

Sure, the guy was crazy, but he wasn't playing fair. Even Jake's madmen tried to take advantage of him.

The genie swept over to him and put his arm around Jake's shoulder like a used car salesman, "And in all the stories, the genies still found a way to get the best of the person making the wish, right?"

Jake nodded sullenly.

"Exactly," said Montague with a broad smile. "Well, this time I'm telling you precisely how I intend to warp your wishes, so you're in a better position than the rest."

Jake thought about it. Then stopped.

What did it matter? He just wanted this guy gone.

Montague tapped his foot impatiently.

"So I need to make wishes where both the wish and its opposite are good. Is that the idea?"

"Of course. I knew you were a bright boy. Now, go ahead. Wish."

"Now? Can't I think about it? I need to work it out."

Montague raised his eyes in surprise. "Patience. Unexpected. Fine. You have until this time tomorrow. Don't lose my bottle or let anyone else clean it. Make your wishes before sunrise tomorrow or lose them all."

"Sure," he answered. But there was no one there.

It worked. The crazy guy was gone and no one knew he was ever there and Jake wasn't in trouble. It would have been nice, though, to have something go his way for once.

---

Jake trudged up the dingy stairs to his third floor apartment. Neither of his roommates was home, but you'd never know it from the smell. The sink was full of dirty dishes; Jake didn't even want to think about washing them. He'd only had cereal, most of the dishes weren't his. One of his lazy roommates could clean them.

He collapsed on the old couch in front of the television, hearing the springs protest beneath him.

Normally he'd sleep or watch television for an hour or two until one of the others got home. He didn't this time. That effete bastard from the morning kept running through his head. He'd even stolen the syrup bottle. Not that he believed the guy, but just in case.

He could use the wishes. It had been another miserable day. A customer took 10 minutes to figure out what temperature he wanted his coffee and the line got huge. Shelley yelled at him for holding up the line like it was his fault the customer was a moron. He didn't know how much longer he could take it.

Pretending he had wishes to make was like playing the lottery. It's fun to dream, even if you know it's not real.

Why not combine them?

He could wish to win the lottery. If the genie gave him the opposite, and he lost, he'd only be out three bucks. If he won, he could take care of his student loans, get his own place, maybe even get a girl. He wasn't bad looking, he just couldn't afford to take a girl anywhere. If he had money Shelley'd probably be all over him and Allison would be even easier.

"Yo, Jake. What're you doing up?"

Tom, a burly ex-high school athlete, charged through the door fresh from his factory job. "Party tonight at The Crimson. You in?"

Tom annoyed Jake. Tom had all the breaks, a good factory job that paid enough to get out of this slum. But he drank and partied so much he was stuck here. "Not tonight, man. Got the morning shift again tomorrow."

Just for a moment he wondered if the genie might be real. This could be his last night in this dump. He'd never have to see Tom again.

While Tom warmed up some food, Jake got out of his way and retreated to his tiny bedroom. Sitting on the bed he thought about his wishes until he heard Tom leave. He had to be careful, since he'd get the opposite of one of them.

He felt silly, but said, "I'm ready to make my wishes, genie. Montague, are you there?"

After a moment he pulled out the bottle and rubbed it.

"So, are we ready to play?" asked a smooth voice from the other side of the bed. "Perhaps you can start by wishing for a vacuum cleaner," he snarked.

Jake hadn't heard the door, and felt his heart catch in his throat as he considered that this might be real.

"Yes. I'm ready. Three wishes, and you'll grant two and the opposite of the third."

"Yes, yes. Those were the rules. No need to remind me."

"All right. For my first wish, I wish that the next time I bought a lottery ticket I would be the sole winner. I figure the opposite is losing, and at least I'm no worse off."

"I will neither confirm nor deny the opposites. First wish made."

"Right. Next I wish I graduated from a major college. I figure I should get something out of all this debt, and if I graduate from a community college, I'm still better off than now." If he didn't graduate at all, nothing would change.

"I see you've been thinking this through," the tall man said while faking a yawn.

"OK, well that might give me money and better prospects, so I figure my love life is next," Jake blushed. He could get a girl if he had money, but just in case that was his opposite wish, he wanted cover. "This might sound a bit weird."

"I doubt that. I have granted wishes to over a hundred men. You are unlikely to come up with a new twist."

"Right." He rushed his words, "I wish that I was married to a woman who was beautiful and dumb." As soon as he got the words out, he slowed down, "I figure that way if she's ugly, at least she'll be smart. Gotta be worth something, right?"

"Three wishes have been made. Wishes granted."

The genie reached out and touched Jake on the forehead. He stiffened and fell backwards onto the bed. Before he and the genie faded away, Montague muttered, "Poor sod."

---

Jake felt an arm draped over him before he opened his eyes. Through the warmth and fuzziness he vaguely remembered making wishes and expecting to have a wife. Hoping she was pretty, he slowly opened his eyes.

Probably not. The arm was hairy. If she was ugly, it was supposed to mean something. Something kinda good. He couldn't quite remember. Oh, yeah, she'd be smart. Smart was not as good as pretty, but it was still good.

His hair pulled when he turned over but he just brushed it out of the way. His hand and nails looked strange, but he wanted to see his wife and couldn't concentrate on two things at once.

"Aaahhh," he yelled.

"What's wrong?" Tom asked sleepily from beside him. He woke up quickly. "Are you all right, hon?"

Jake sat bolt upright and felt his hair tug behind him and his prominent breasts shift forward when he stopped. "This isn't right, no. It's not what..." He trailed off.

"Shhh," Tom comforted as he sat up and stroked Jake's hair. "It's all right. You must have had a bad dream," he whispered in Jake's ear, nuzzling slightly.

This was wrong. Jake wanted to pull away. Tom shouldn't be breathing softly on his neck even though it felt so good and he wasn't sure why he wanted to get away. He purred while thinking about it.

"Hold that thought, babe," Tom whispered in Jake's ear, "we don't have time this morning. I've gotta get ready for work." He stared at Jake hungrily, "We'll have our fun tonight. Oh yeah." He rubbed his hand over Jake's breast and Jake pressed himself into it because it felt so good.

Something was wrong, but he couldn't bring himself to think about it for a few more moments.

Tom suddenly jumped out of bed and ran to the nearest door, pausing only to look back at Jake and smile, "Beat you to the bathroom - I might actually get ready on time." He laughed a little. Jake laughed back even though he wasn't sure why. Tom must have been making a joke.

While Tom was in the bathroom Jake climbed out of bed. His violet nightgown ended at mid-thigh and gave a clear view of his breasts. He was pretty sure that's not what he usually wore to bed. Then again, he thought, he was pretty sure he didn't have prominent breasts.

Breasts, nightgown, Tom calling him babe and hon. He must be a girl. How did that happen?

It had to be the genie.

He tried to remember his wishes. He knew he made some, but he couldn't quite remember what they were. He had to squish his face up into a squint to get them.

College. He wished he'd graduated.

There was a diploma on the wall. The words weren't easy to read, and he had to speak them out loud to get through it. "University of Florida," he read slowly, "Jessica Masters, Bachelor of Arts in Communication." It took him almost a minute.

Was that him?

He'd wished for a degree from a big university. He didn't say what major, so maybe that was his. Reading it had been really hard. There must be something wrong with his eyes. Glasses don't look pretty, he hoped he didn't have to wear them.

What else?

He wanted to be married to a beautiful and dumb woman. He'd had a good reason, it was something really smart. But he couldn't quite remember what it was. That one must have gone wrong, but how? Something about an opposite.

"The opposite of marrying a beautiful and dumb woman is being a married, beautiful, and dumb woman," rolled through his head in an English accent. He thought about it for a few moments and decided it must be true.

The shower was running and he pictured Tom in the shower. He sat down and clamped his legs shut.

He looked in the mirror and ran his fingers through his hair. He was beautiful, he realized. He struck a few poses, pushed out his breasts and canted his hips. Pursing his lips, he could feel himself getting turned on. It felt different than it used to, but he had trouble recalling what it used to feel like.

He admired the thin gold band on his left hand and smiled. The shower was still running, and this time he didn't resist, but went in. "Need a hand in here?" she asked.

She remembered her third wish. While Tom was at work today, she had to buy a lottery ticket. That should help them out a lot. But it could wait.

She had more important things to do first, as she opened the shower door to get a good look at her husband.