Voices (reprise) — J Morose

warning: May contain nuts

So I listen to her in silent repose,
The shadow banishing light of her song,
Once more hope of living within me rose,
Of calmer dreams left hidden everlong.

Off I began with a soaring heart,
To seek out others that could light the way,
Well I pack her up in rucksack crimson,
And set off to the big city for the day.

Alone I wander those desolate streets,
Surrounded by life, yet my doubts consume,
The dark of night once more do I meet,
The voice within, she no longer communes.

Aimlessly browsing those endless ways,
Purchasing little, bereft of my muse,
Eating alone in the stark light of day,
What hope for a shy one, unable to choose.

The long dreary road took a while to walk,
Endless plodding, doubts turned to fear,
Of people not yet met, scared to talk,
Like carrying my own funeral bier.

Arrived had I at the venue early,
No sign had I of the others like me,
So patiently sat on cold bollard surly,
My mind once more in torment be.

At last I viewed those beautiful others,
With rainments smart, their faces adorned,
Considered myself an inferior brother,
Despair complete, I silently adjourn.

With tearful eyes and throbbing feet,
Silently plodding to the railway station,
'Why today did you leave me standing'
'Alone in the dark?' Heart's total devastation.

Stood am I on that bustling platform,
My thoughts turn to sadness, of hopes dashed away,
'Do I end it now?' Despair holds me ransom,
The train I saw coming, voice within me held sway.

Journeying onward once more, the path unclear,
'Who the hell am I?' shrieks my clarion call,
Once more she comes to me, voice sounding dear,
'You are my other me, I am your soul.'

---

Wrote this the night after I wrote 'Voices' as a continuation. It came after I endeavored to seek out others IRL. Sort of bailed out last minute as my head was a mess and I was in awe of the others. Bit grim I know, sorry about that. I was undecided whether or not to share this, but decided to be open and honest with myself for a change. Voices was Friday nights song of hope, the reprise was Saturdays song. - Jay

Many thanks to Kristina for her observations.

Was unsure whether to post as work or blog, decided to post as story, hope that is okay....