Nick didn't know how long he fell in the darkness. It felt like a long time, but his thoughts and movements felt unnaturally slow, like he was trying to move through honey. And then it began to get cold, at first it was just cool, a welcome relief from the stuffy heat of the seemingly endless bag. Then it became colder, making him rub his arms and chest, trying to stay warm. Then he began to shiver, his teeth clicking as his body tried to stay warm. He wished he still had his winter coat.

Finally the fall ended, and Nick found himself landing in a soft snow bank. Shivering so hard his teeth hurt, he looked around trying to figure out where he was. Above him was the night sky, lit up by an almost blinding aurora. The lights danced, shifting shape and colour like a roiling ocean, brilliant white turned to a sea green with purple tints, light blue came and went in seconds, and green shifted to red as purple rose high into the sky. It was hypnotic.

Then the elf who had kidnapped him landed in the snow bank with a squeal of glee.

“Whoo! That was a one candy cane ride wasn't it?!” the elf said.

Getting to his feet, Nick shoved his hands into his armpits, it felt like twenty below. “Where are we? How did you get me here?”

“We're in Santa's village. Come on, let's get you in out of the cold. I'm Jingles by the way.” The elf headed for a large building that looked like it was made out of gingerbread and candy and covered in snowy icing, clearly expecting Nick to follow him.

Looking around, there were a lot of little ginger bread like houses that were so small Nick would have to crawl on his hands and knees to get inside. Most of them had dark windows, either empty or whoever lived in them were asleep. It didn't seem like there were many choices, freeze to death, try to get into one of the houses, or follow Jingles. At least with Jingles he was sure to get somewhere warm, and maybe he could find someone sane who would send him home.

“Oh god,” he whispered. What if he'd gone crazy. Maybe this was all some weird hallucination and he was lying on the floor of the convenience store muttering to himself. Yeah, that had to be it. Stress had made him go crazy. Someone would call the hospital and he'd wake up in a hospital bed and have a long talk with a psychiatrist.

Or maybe he'd been hit by a car. That would be better, wouldn't it? He was in a coma, or some drug fantasy. No insanity needed. Once he woke up, he could sue the driver or set up a go fund me, and use the money to get his life back in order. It was the literal kick in the ass he needed.

Feeling more calm now that there was a logical explanation to his current situation, even though he was still freezing his balls, he hurried inside the gingerbread building. It had to be warmer, and going with the weird dream couldn't hurt after all.

There were several more of the strange looking elves, male and female coming or going through several doors that lead deeper into the building. Most kept their heads down rushing to get wherever they were going, a few gave Nick a quick glance. One male elf with candy apple red hair smirked, looking like a kid about to pull the wings off of a fly. Another one shook her head that made Nick think she was pitying him.

Jingles was standing at a receptionist desk that looked like it was a graham cracker propped up on six candy canes, and the receptionist was sitting on a marshmallow. The woman looked like she had chewed on a lemon all day, and was tapping away at a high tech computer, pointedly ignoring everyone and everything around her.

With no better idea of what he was supposed to do, Nick walked over to the candy desk, ducking his head a little to avoid hitting the ceiling. His shivering was slowing down as he began to warm up. The room wasn't what he would call warm, but it was a lot better than being outside. Watching some of the elves, he wondered how they weren't freezing in their thin clothes, especially the women. The men were wearing fairly thin green and red stockings and green t-shirts, which didn't seem like they'd do much in the cool building. The women had less, wearing red and white Christmas dresses with short skirts and cut low revealing their shoulders and the top of their breasts. They were so tiny he felt bad about looking, but they were clearly adults, just miniature.

His wandering eye was brought back to Jingles and the receptionist.

“Candy, can we get a move on here, my shift is almost done and I need to get our new volunteer settled,” Jingles said to the woman.

With a sigh, Candy finally looked at them, revealing big sparkly blue eyes. “Hold your jingle bells, Jingles, everyone is busy right now. Do you have form RUD-01-F filled out in triplicate?”

Jingles reached inside his coat and pulled out a thick stack of papers, handing them over. Taking them, Candy began to slowly look over each page, occasionally typing something into her computer and checking the paper to whatever was on the screen. Then she'd ask Jingles something related to the papers, citing a rule or question that made no sense to Nick, only for Jingles to say something that apparently made sense if you knew bureaucratic speak.

It reminded Nick of his last visit to the DMV, before his car had broken down. Sighing, he decided it was time to take some control in this dream. “Hey, I shouldn't be here. This crazy elf kidnapped me from work.”

“Hey,” Jingles said, “you wished for a change. We have it on record, and I filled out the forms perfectly.”

Candy gave him a nasty look.

“Nearly perfectly,” Jingles corrected. “You're perfect for the job.”

“How am I perfect?” Nick demanded. “I'm a human, not an elf. And I don't want to just drop my entire life.”

The elf looked at him like he was crazy. “I saw your apartment, and your life. You were half a step up from sleeping in a dumpster. You'll love your new digs, and you'll get a whole new wardrobe, not those rags you call clothes. Don't worry about anything, we'll get you all fixed up in no time and you'll never want to go back.”

“Sure freezing my balls off here is so great.”

There were gasps from all the elves who heard him curse. Then everyone was finding reasons to make themselves scarce, hurrying away at high speed. Only Jingles and Candy stayed, and they were looking nervously at the numerous ornamental snowmen that filled the room.

A tiny elf hurrying by with a tray of steaming drinks suddenly found herself short one, as Jingles took a cup with a happy snowflake on it. “No reason to get nasty now, Nick,” Jingles said, handing him the drink. “Have this nice cup of eggnog and you'll feel better.”

“I'm lactose intolerant,” Nick said, refusing to take the cup.

“Oh I'm sorry to hear that. How about a nice cup of cocoa with marshmallows?”

“A mug of warm milk always cheers me up,” Candy said. She was finally smiling, and it seemed like she was trying to sound cheerful, but it sounded very forced. And the smile would have looked just about right on a corpse.

“I can't have milk,” Nick explained.

“Oh. We'll fix that up once we're all done the paperwork,” Jingles said.

“Where is the paperwork for me to go home?”

The elves burst out laughing. “Now that the paperwork is filed, this is your home,” Jingles said.

“Don't believe the movies. We run a tight operation where everyone is happy and once you see it, you become a part of it. And we're all holly jolly happy about that,” Candy said far too cheerfully.

“Come on Nick, lets get you fitted for your new role.”

Looking at the exit, Nick considered running for it. But it was freezing outside, and he still didn't have a coat. Running further into the building likely wouldn't do much to help him, he had no idea where to go, or who might be able to help. Following Jingles was probably the smartest thing he could do. Eventually he'd find someone who wasn't just a pencil pusher and could sort things out. And this was a dream, it was following some kind of story line. As long as he followed along it would probably just stay creepy. Breaking the story might turn it into a nightmare. That wouldn't hurt him, this was a dream after all, but it definitely wouldn't be fun.

Taking a moment to push his fear down, he followed Jingles through a door off to the side that no one had gone in or out of. The hallway was dimly lit, the gingerbread walls were scuffed, had what looked like red stains, and were crumbling in places. They passed several doors that were made of metal rather than gingerbread or candy. The doors were dented, and Nick hoped that was just rust or paint on them, and not what he thought it was. Compared to the nicely lit reception room, this looked like something from a movie where the hero headed for a prison cell or torture chamber. Facing the freezing cold outside was starting too look like the better option.

Before he could work up the courage to turn and run, Jingles opened a door at the very end of the hall. Peering inside, it looked a lot like a normal shower room, with normal tiles and no candy to be seen. Most of the shower heads were low, clearly made for elves, but a few were human height.

“Time to get you cleaned up and properly dressed for your new job,” Jingle said. He went to a console built into the wall and started tapping the screen.

“Where do I put my clothes and things?” Nick asked.

The elf pointed vaguely at a set of shelves. “Over there, you can bring them to your new home for keepsakes.”

A shower would be nice. It would probably be warm at least. While stripping down one of the showers started, filling the room with a sweet smelling steam. The flowery scent wasn't exactly something Nick would normally want to smell like, but it wasn't overpowering. And it wasn't like Nick was going to meet anyone he knew, this was all a dream.

Putting his things on the shelf, he went to the shower and sighed in bliss at the warmth. The chill quickly left his bones as he scrubbed himself down. The water was a little oily, probably from the perfume which was likely some type of soap as well. Whatever, it was just a dream. He started scrubbing himself clean.

The heat and the perfume made his head spin as he washed up. Everything seemed to float away, his problems, his worries, even his body, it was as if his brain was going on a nice little vacation, letting his physical self go through the motions. The drugs must be kicking in and were affecting his dream. That was a good thing, the sooner he woke up from this coma hallucination the better. In a daze, he smiled, enjoying the feeling of weightlessness.

Distantly he felt his hands run through his hair. It felt thicker and much, much longer than it should be, he could feel it tickling his lower back. Something long and pointy-pocked his palms, curiously he felt the sides of his head, his ears weren't round anymore, but pointy almost like a cat... or an elf. Nick chuckled to himself, the oddness not affecting his cloudy, happy mind. “This dream is so weird.”

Scrubbing his face, it seemed to shift painlessly under his fingers. His chin became more pointed, his cheekbones more prominent, and everything was getting smaller. It was a bit of a surprise when he didn't feel any stubble, he really needed to shave before, now he didn't. His father would say it was as smooth as a baby's bottom. Wiping water from his eyes, his eyelashes got caught in each other, something that had never happened before. Chuckling, it sounded like a girl was giggling, the acoustics of the shower room were really messed up.

His hands moved down his dream body. The chest hair was gone, soft, smooth skin had replaced the thick dry skin he normally had. And his flat chest wasn't flat anymore. He chuckled again as he felt small firm breasts topped by sensitive nipples that made him shiver as he gave them a pinch. They were a lot better than his ex's tits. So this was the way his dream was going. He could live with that.

Going downwards, his small belly was changed to a flat and shapely stomach, just the right amount of fat over muscle. His waist and hips had transformed to. He actually had them now, feeling his new curves, he had to admire the attention to detail, this dream knew what he liked.

His lusty thoughts came to a halt, and fear pierced the haze he had been in. If he was in a sexy dream, why was he turning into a girl? It should be a beautiful girl coming onto him. Staggering out of the hot water, he fell to his knees, gagging and retching as the drugged up high he'd been experiencing came to a sudden end.

Blinking the water out of his eyes, Nick looked down at the watery floor and saw two tiny, feminine hands where he was sure his own hands should be.

Slowly, he moved his thumbs. The soft, dainty thumbs moved up and down in time with his thoughts. Kneeling, he raised the hands that weren't his, that couldn't be his, up to his face and made two fists. The fake hands copied his moves.

Gasping, his heart racing, Nick grabbed his hair and pulled it. Before the shower, his short hair wouldn't do much if he pulled it, it was almost a buzz cut. This hair went on and on, he could feel it moving up his back, and as he brought his tiny hands forwards, the hair came with them. It wasn't the light brown it should be, it was a silvery blue colour. Finally he reached the end of it and pulled. Pain flared on his scalp as he tugged at the hair that shouldn't exist.

“Well that was a success. Now you look like a proper elf, and you're all set for you new job, Nick,” Jingles said.

Looking down, Nick saw his small breasts heaving as he hyperventilated. Turning to Jingles, who was leering at him, Nick did the only thing that he could think of. He screamed.