I was sitting on the couch in my living room this evening, just catching up on my e-Mail from the last several days, while my wife watched TV. We had been watching the news, and when it went off the show ET came on. It was a special broadcast about Celine Dion, so she left it there even though she usually doesn’t watch that show.
I wasn’t really paying attention, but I did happen to catch a commercial that ran mid-show - it just happened to catch my attention. The commercial started out by asking when you die, are you going to heaven or not? Then went on to talk about how you could know for sure by going to “Heaven Or Not.net”.
Pretty sure I already know that answer and don’t need some bogus religious website to tell me, lol.
Yeah………. NOT.
Comments
This reminds me of joke I heard a long time ago
I was a military brat, and thus grew up all over the US and saw first hand the variety of Christianity practiced in the US. While many of the stereotypes of those that live in the southern states are incorrect, the southern baptist can be quite devoted (read: scary as hell)
So, the joke...
I once saw a man on a bridge about to jump.
I said, "Don't do it!"
He said, "Nobody loves me."
I said, "God loves you. Do you believe in God?"
He said, "Yes."
I said, "Are you a Christian or a Jew?"
He said, "A Christian."
I said, "Me, too! Protestant or Catholic?"
He said, "Protestant."
I said, "Me, too! What denomination?"
He said, "Baptist."
I said, "Me, too! Northern Baptist or Southern Baptist?"
He said, "Northern Baptist."
I said, "Me, too! Northern Conservative Baptist or Northern Liberal Baptist?"
He said, "Northern Conservative Baptist."
I said, "Me, too! Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region, or Northern Conservative Baptist Eastern Region?"
He said, "Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region."
I said, "Me, too!"
Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region Council of 1879, or Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region Council of 1912?"
He said, "Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region Council of 1912."
I said, "Die, heretic!" And I pushed him over.
We the willing, led by the unsure. Have been doing so much with so little for so long,
We are now qualified to do anything with nothing.
See my main comment below.
See my main comment below. That is exactly the one of the hypocrisies I am talking about. “If you do not share my beliefs and values, you are doomed to burn in hell for all eternity!”
Logic fail
It never occurs to these people that such sentiments are a massive logical paradox.
I once spent an hour explaining to a Jehovah's Witness that, because I didn't believe in his God then I couldn't go to Hell because, to my way of thinking, if there is no God then there is no Heaven and there is no Hell. It took that long for my point of view to sink in.
JWs
MANY years ago, I took a coach from That Town That Starts With L to Sunderland, a six hour journey. It was in the days when smoking was allowed on buses, and the only spare seats were a double immediately in front of the rear bench seat. Not good.
Just before the coach pulled away, a last passenger jumped on and took the seat next to me, a very pretty young girl. As you do, we started a conversation.
!What do you do?", I asked.
"I'm a Bible student", she replied.
Six hours of travel ahead, and I am sitting next to a JW. Time to employ the Logic Bomb.
"Ah! Witness?"
"Yes"
"Your church follows a doctrine based on the Revelation of St John, amirite?"
"Yes indeed"
"That so many people are destined to be saved and sit with God in heaven?"
"That's correct!"
"How many people is that?"
"[So many thousand; can't be bothered to dig out the number]"
"How many members are there, in your church?"
"[So many millions, worldwide]"
"So what happens to all the rest of your members after [X thousand] get to go up into heaven?"
"They inherit the Earth"
"What is it they've done that bars them from going up to heaven, then?"
Blessed (ahem) peace for the rest of the journey.
I hear ya!
Being raised in a religious conservative community I have also become very disillusioned with virtually all organized religion. Especially the so-called “Christian” religious groups have impressed me with their hypocrisy on so many levels. As well as totally unrealistic expectations and world views.
I have no real problems with the person upstairs, but I do have serious problems with the ground crew.
Yep
And it is true within even denominations.
Episcopalians in different parts of the world will vary widely in how conservative they are even though they have a supposed very liberal bias in the US. Not true though in the midwest as an example.
I found my home state for practical reasons - I had to find a job and this is where it was - but it has turned out to be a very blue state and it is for the most part very decent to live here. An example of that is 33 years ago the company who hired me found out I was trans (from my references) and still hired me and paid for my move this state.
Not surprisingly this state is heavily Democratic and became more balanced in their social and political perspective through the years.
The Republicans here used to be sane but their last candidate for governor was full on of the same stripe of a certain Orange one and he went down in flames in the election.
Those Orange supporters have no shame, even having lawn signs showing their blind allegiance to the bastard.
Life Of Brian
The movie skewered not only Christianity, but all the different Liberation groups who hated each other more than they hated the Romans.
Mind if I join you?
If all the self-righteous types are right and heaven’s for them, what decent soul would want it? Anyway, Jesus didn’t hang with that crowd when He was on earth; no reason to think He’s changed his mind. :)
Emma
Can't remember all the details, but...
There was a joke about a man who was in a coma for a long time, then woke up, recovered, and was astonished at how wonderful the world had become. People were kinder, everything worked better, there were no wars, and so on and so forth.
He asked for an explanation, and someone explained, "Did you ever hear of the Rapture? Turns out it was true! And once all those folk got taken up to heaven, it resolved so many problems down here!"
- iolanthe
Two Types
There are two types of people in this world, the righteous and the non-righteous. The classifying is done by the (self) righteous.
Michelle B