Once the ice was broken, Tina and I quickly warmed up to Andi. She was sharp and funny and had a huge heart. Despite all the stuff she went through growing up and the tension and drama she saw daily working as an E.R. Nurse, she had the most cheerful outlook of anyone I'd ever known. Maybe knowing how tense and bleak life could be, she had a better appreciation of the micro-joys of each ordinary day.

A few days later I got a text from a number I didn't recognize. But I had a hunch.

“Hope you don't mind. I got your number from Zoe. What are you doing?”

I texted back “Not sure whether I mind or not. Who IS this?”

“Andi! I was chatting with Zoe and she said I should call you and hang out. :-) ….if that's OK?”

“I'd love to hang out. ….but I'm at work and Zoe KNOWS that.”

“Oh. OK. Sorry. Hope you don't mind me texting you, but I need to do a few errands at the mall and Dave is insufferable when I take him shopping.....” She didn't need to use an emoji. Her disappointment was palpable.

“I'm through in about an hour. ….can I meet you there?”

“I can pick you up. Where do you work?”

Crap.

“No worries. I don't want to hold you up. I can meet you at the mall.” I countered.

“So an hour?”

“That depends. Which mall?”

“Four Oaks?”

“How about 90 minutes-ish?”

“Text me when U get there and we can meet up. :-)”

I exhaled a breath of relief. Then I tore through my last deliveries and headed home to 'Chloe-up'.

Fortunately, that's a really quick routine of stripping off Tom. I got to the mall almost exactly when I said. When I rendezvoused with Andi, she still shot me a glare.

“I was THIS close to giving up on you” she signed holding thumb precariously close to her forefinger.

“Sorry.” I sighed, thinking I came almost exactly when I predicted. I guessed it seemed like an eternity to Andi... which I somehow found flattering. “I... doesn't matter.. sorry.... Thanks for waiting....”

Andi shrugged and cut me a pass.

“So. Are we good to go?” she signed. “I've already had waay too many coffees.” she leaned in and whispered with a grin.

I smiled politely and understood why 90 minutes seemed like an eternity. Andi shrugged and stepped up and out of her seat. “Time's wasting. Shall we go?” she signed.

“Of course.” I said.

Andi shot out of her chair and through the door. When I caught up to her on the busy sidewalk she quietly said “Maybe the coffee....s got me too wired... but I have a lot on my list... you in?” She turned back to regard me.

I nodded. “Totally.”

We tore through shops like an invading army.

Andi's idea of a “shopping spree” was not what I was expecting. Unlike any of my other friends, there were no visits to Neiman Marcus, Saks or even Lord & Taylor. Andi was the epitome of ….sensible.... Target, Kohl's and Gap were her mainstays.... and I think more than half of the stuff she bought was for Dave. When I asked her about it, she pulled me aside and whispered.

“I always heard women at work grousing about the ordeal of taking their boys shopping for back to school..... I realized with Dave that they never outgrow that.” She shot me a smirk. “I know his sizes, so this is just easier.... And now that I have someone to shop with, a lot more fun.”

I politely returned her smile. I could not see how she could wring fun out of a supply run to Target. “What about you?” I smiled. “We're here. World's our oyster.... Anyplace you want to go.... just for YOU?” I was somewhat stunned that I was the one trying to coax Andi into some self-indulgent splurging.

She shot me a guilty look. “Well.... there are some things I've been thinking about.... but they're really not necess....”

I cut her off with a gentle arm slap “We're here.... Mall's our playground.... Just trying something on doesn't mean you have to buy it. God, girl.... live a little” I urged with a grin.

She shot me a guilty grin. “OK. You twisted my arm.”

….so we went to the one 'specialty boutique' Andi always wanted to visit, but never did.

Work 'N Gear.

I smiled and shook my head. This girl was going to need a LOT of work.

Andi was as over the moon as a Flanders child discovering there was such a thing as flavored candy. She spun through the place, holding a colorful variety of scrubs up to herself and gazing dreamily in the mirror.

“Go on. Try them on.” I found myself having to urge her. She shot me a baffled look. I pointed to the dressing room. “That's why they HAVE them.” I grinned.

I snickered at the thought that Tina's friend Lauren and her drones would go absolutely nuts with Andi at a mall. I pushed her to dip her baby toe in the shallow end, shopping for flowered scrubs, and still felt she was ready to explode with excitement.

I had to work harder than the salesclerk – who in all honesty was seriously disinterested in selling and only seemed attentive when he thought someone might shoplift. I finally managed to persuade Andi to “indulge herself” in some kicky new ….workwear. I smiled to myself that this girl was going to need more than my coaching to loosen up. I'd have to recruit Tina and Zoe so we could triple-team her.

We had spent a couple hours at the mall, which I gathered was a record for Andi. Finally we had one stop left.

All those coffees finally caught up to her, so we hightailed it to the ladies.

We had too many bags to comfortably fit in a stall, and neither Andi or I intended to tie up the handicapped stall just because we had bags. One of the two standard stalls were occupied, so we arranged that we'd take turns. One would watch the bags while the other took a stall.

Andi insisted I go first, even though it was her need that brought us to the ladies. I quickly realized the futility of arguing and resolved to go quickly so she was free to seek relief. As I headed to the stall, an ill-temepered older woman headed to the sink and shot me a glare. She then turned to stare daggers at Andi who waited patiently out of the way with all our bags. I thought no more of it and went about my business. I quickly finished and went to wash up while Andi made a beeline to a stall.

There was no one else in the restroom, so I didn't worry about our collection of bags in the corner where Andi left them.

Suddenly the door BURST open and the scowling older woman from earlier stormed into
the ladies with a bedraggled mall security guard behind her.

“There's a MAN in the ladies room!” She blared at the weary guard.

“So you keep saying ma'am.” The guard sighed. “You didn't need to call 911. This is private property. You should have come to us first.”

“What do I pay my taxes for???” she near-screamed. “I can't believe after all that, they contact ….you.” she said, her voice laden with scorn and contempt.

“It IS my job ma'am.” The guard said with a sigh.

I could barely believe my eyes. I shook myself out of my stunned state and addressed the guard. “I have no idea what she told you....”

“Told the police....” the mall-security guard corrected. “THEY contacted us.” The guard seemed to just want this to be over quickly and be rid of this agitated older lady.

I regrouped. “OK. I don't know what you were told, but I.....”

“Not HER!” The woman yelled with contempt. She then shot an arm out at the stall. “THERE!!!”

Andi couldn't help but hear the commotion. The woman was a tornado or outrage and agitation. There was a flush and seemingly endless seconds later the stall door opened. Andi stood with poise and tried to hide the 'not again' look on her face. I knew instantly this was not ….her first rodeo.....

She walked over to the guard and surly woman. Shot them a look, then silently went to wash up.

“Well???? Aren't you going to DO something??” The woman instantly badgered the guard.

“I am.” The guard replied as calmly and quietly as the woman was loud and out of control. “I am letting her wash up.”

“HIM! You're letting HIM use the sink in the LADIES room!!!!”

I couldn't stand by any longer. I stepped between them and glared at the woman. “What the HELL is wrong with you? Are you off your meds or something?” I was furious and struggling to keep it under wraps. Out of the corner of my eye, I caught Andi's glance in the mirror. It was near-telepathic. I knew she was forcing herself to remain zen and shot me a look that said 'thanks.... but ….not helping.'

The woman started jabbing me in the chest. “YOU... stay out of this! I don't know what sick thing you have going on. but I'm putting an end to it NOW!” She turned to the guard, shooting her poking arm in Andi's direction again. “ARREST HIM!”

The guard sighed and shot me a quick 'kill me now' glance then returned her attention to the woman.

“Ma'am.... I'm not authorized to arrest anyone ….even if I WANTED to....”

...and I knew at that moment just WHO the guard wished she could drag off in cuffs. Andi regarded us all silently from the mirror, still standing at the sink.

“THAT'S why I called 911! They should have come in the first place, instead of shrugging me off to …..you.” The scorn in her voice was SO odious, I think every one of us – save, possibly the above-it-all Andi - just wanted to slap her.

“Ma'am.... that's....” the guard stopped and rethought her response. “We should free up the rest room and discuss this in the mall office.” She shot Andi an apologetic look. “Please....” and she gestured us to the door. The furious woman seemed irked that justice was being delayed but conflicted that at least her sacred Ladies room was being vacated. Andi & I grabbed our bags and joined the guard and obnoxious woman to walk to the mall offices. We probably didn't have to. I doubt they had any real reason to compel us, but Andi seemed resigned, and I was so furious I wanted to give the woman a piece of my mind and set the beleaguered guard straight.

It took almost fifteen minutes. We each spoke individually to the guard and some sort of supervisor in a glass walled room deep within the mall offices. While I was telling my version, the supervisor excused himself and stepped out to attend to the older woman, who was standing screaming at Andi in the waiting area, that same stupid arm jabbing in accusatory stabs as she berated Andi at the top of her lungs. She was finally escorted to another room where she was left alone to wait her turn.

Long story short, we all spoke our piece and went off to await the outcome. Andi and I in the outer waiting area, and furious woman in the windowless room where they first sequestered her. Very quickly we were ushered into the office, where the supervisor spoke and the guard looked on apologetically. We were told how deeply the mall management firm regretted our unpleasant encounter and how much they hoped we would continue to keep an open mind when next deciding where to shop.... the supervisor noticeably eyeing our collection of bags. We were each presented with mall gift cards good for any store on the property and offered a profound and seemingly deeply sincere apology for our 'unpleasant encounter'. The guard sprang up and expressed her regret and distress at having to accost us in the loo. Andi smiled a shrug and I shook her hand with a smile. “I understand... no hard feelings... just glad I don't have YOUR job.” I laughed and rolled my eyes in the direction of the room where angry woman was stewing.

“Don't worry about any further encounters with ….her....” the supervisor said with disdain, cocking her head in the direction of the windowless room. “She will soon find out she is no longer welcome on the premises.”

Andi shot me a quizzical look, so I asked the question.

“So, what.... she's banned or something?” They both grinned and nodded. “Can you DO that?”

“It's private property” the supervisor said. “We have sole discretion over who is welcome and who is ….trespassing.” she smiled.

The guard grinned wickedly. “She may not believe or ...accept... that she's persona non grata.... but she'll quickly find out.... and keep finding out until she gets it through her thick skull” she said, barely hiding her delight anticipating these ….lessons.

As she walked us out of the office, the guard quietly whispered “This is not her first time. She accosted a dad taking his three year old into the men's room. A mixed race couple she was convinced were a pimp and his whore. A grandfather waiting for his wife with his granddaughter.... I could go on, but you get the gist. This is not her first time pulling stuff like this.” Then her grin got wicked. “Actually, it's her last.”

Andi and I just shared a look. There was no joy or vindication. This toxic woman was banished from the mall, but she and the monsters in her dark, fearful soul will no doubt find other places to sow hysteria and dread.

We were quietly reflective as we walked to Andi's car... with purses full of gift cards ….a 'please don't sue us' apology. I kept insisting that Andi take mine since she was the one wronged and put through this ordeal. She shrugged and admitted this wasn't the first time, and actually turned out far better than most. She thanked me for standing up for her during our 'office inquisition'. I waved that off and admitted that I was glad to be a witness to it all, since it made for two identical testimonies against 911-woman. Andi laughed and told me I'd be surprised how many women like that there were. I thought for a moment and realized maybe I would be, but others wouldn't ….including my dear friend Violet who never spoke of such things, and probably many lifelong women who weren't born 'instagram pretty' and had run ins with paranoid gender zealots. I sighed at the thought, the gloom beginning to overtake me. Until I turned and glanced at Andi, who had put it behind her as quickly as finding a piece of TP stuck to her heel and dislodging it. I would learn a lot from her about making peace with the past and not letting 'the long tail' of experiences drag at me like an anchor chain. Andi had already shrugged off the unpleasantry and was gleeful at the unexpected giftcards in her purse ...probably dreaming of her next shopping spree.... no doubt at Work 'N Gear. (sigh)

I was getting ready for work the next day when Zoe burst into the bathroom.

“Oh. Fuck. Sorry” she blurted.

Yet she lingered. Staring at me.

I turned and stared at her. “No biggie. I will be out in a moment. My bad for not locking the door.”

She stood there and continued to stare. I could sense that she was piecing it together,

“Fuck.” She muttered.

I feigned ignorance. “What?” I asked rhetorically.

“THIS is how you do it.” she nearly crowed.

I turned to her with a raised eyebrow, trying desperately to bluff.

Zoe flashed a shit-eating-grin. “I've seen you. Fresh from the shower going back to your room.....” She gave me a glare. “It was always fucking Chloe... even dripping wet with no makeup....” Her grin grew wicked. I just waited for it.

“TOM is the fucking act!” she crowed.

I turned to her with my 'Duh!' face. “Well... yeah. You knew that when you told your dad we'd take the house. …..SO???”

Zoe stopped a minute. I could see her gathering her thoughts... thinking just how to frame this.... “It's just.... I just realized how much effort you put into being ...Tom....”

I shot her a querulous look. “Your point being?....”

“Why do you bother? Just dump Tom already and be Chloe ….be yourself... full-time.”

I don't think Zoe was expecting my pained expression. “I'm not ….there yet....” I sighed. “There are still some ….advantages.... to having Tom …..available....”

To my surprise, Zoe grinned and nodded. “Believe it or not, I get it. Even if Tom is really the disguise....” and she raised an eyebrow as she scanned the bathroom where I was 'putting on Tom' for the day “...and a hell of a lot of work.... It's a mask.... you can put it on and become invisibro” She grinned at her own made-up word. “Let's face it, Chloe always turns heads, even in sweats and no makeup you turn heads....” she chuckled “I can't tell you how many bitches you really piss off with that easy-breezy covergirl thing you've got going” she smirked and paused, obviously remembering some incident or other, but then got back on track “no one pays any attention to fucking Tom... unless someone wants to I.D. you because, seriously..... Tom looks, like 15 or some shit.”

I nodded. “That's why I go to all this trouble.” I scowled waving my hand over my jawline.

“Yeah. Pretty convincing beard shadow.” Zoe conceded.

I nodded. I was relieved that even though Zoe knew it was really cosmetic, that she agreed it was convincing.

“You still look like a 15 year old.... just one who shaves.” She laughed.

I rolled my eyes. “It gets the job done. Since I learned how to paint on Tom, I've had far less attention paid... and that's all I want. To work without customers and coworkers trying to flirt or getting overly personal. Tom lets me disappear. And I'm not yet ready to give up that super-power.” I grinned, trying to lighten up this surprisingly heavy subject.

“So while bitches I know call their makeup routine 'War Paint', yours is actually camouflage!” Zoe laughed.

“Pretty much.” I smiled. “It lets me fade right into the background.”

“Fair enough invisibro.” she laughed. “Get back to it. Don't let me make you late for work..... if they even fuckin' notice when you show up!” she leered.

I rolled my eyes. “Thanks. I'll be thru in a few, then it's all yours.”

“I'm not waiting for you bitch!” Zoe laughed, then proceeded to spin around to the toilet and pee. “Keep the sink as long as you want.”

“I'll be done in time for you to wash your hands.” I laughed as I put the finishing touches on 'Tom'.

Zoe spun her head around, scanning the bathroom. “Who said that? I could have sworn someone was here a moment ago....”

I laughed politely at her lame joke and wandered back to my room to dress for work.

I was pulling a 'hell sandwich' as I called days when I worked a split 6-9A and 4-7P shift at the courier company and squeezed Office Oasis into the middle. It was also my day for dinner so I swung by the coffee shop to see if I could get away with Chinese take out.

“Don't worry about it” Tina waved it off. “You're off the hook tonight. We're going out.”

“We?” I raised an eyebrow. Then I flinched as Zoe punched my arm from behind. I turned to her wicked grin. “Yeah. WE.” and she motioned to a table where a grinning Jeannie waved at us. She was sitting with her scary friend JoAnn.

“Jeannie called and invited us to cheer on JoAnn's derby team tonight.”

“...umm The Hellians?” I grasped

“Hells Belles.” Tina corrected.

“They're going up against 'Slamazon Prime' ” Zoe grinned. “I've seen them.... they're fucking monsters. This is gonna be good.” She cackled.

Tina looked apologetic. “Jeannie invited us.... um, I mean me and Chloe.... but the match starts at seven and I knew Tom worked til 7 and wouldn't get home until after 8 so.... I asked Zoe.”

I gave her a resigned smile. “Yeah. It's probably more Zoe's speed anyway.”

“Hell yeah!” Zoe laughed. “Anyway, you weren't invited bro.” She shot me that evil grin she always used when torturing Tom.

“Who's not invited?” JoAnn asked as she and Jeannie approached us.

Zoe cocked a thumb at me. “This one's trying to barnacle himself into our girl's night.”

“I was n....” I started to protest, but Zoe cut me off.

“Give it up bro... you're not coming.”

Jeannie shot me a look and turned to Zoe. “Nobody said anything about a girls night....”

“It's OK. I'm working anyway. Thanks for the invite though.” I shrugged to Jeannie.

JoAnn leaned in and extended her hand. I thought I was prepared for it this time, but she still crushed my hand like a walnut. “No. You should come anyway. Even late. We could always use an extra paying spectator.....” she looked at me expectantly. I knew what she was waiting for. Before I could answer, I heard Zoe snort a laugh.

“Fuckin' Tom.” she laughed.

JoAnn shot me a long look. We had only met that one time at Sous Vide. And that night she met Chloe. After a tense pause she finally addressed me deadpan.

“So you go by your middle name?” she smirked.

I stared at her like a confused Golden Retriever.

“Tom... or are you maybe F. Tom?” she grinned. I turned to scowl at Zoe.

“Tom's fine.” I finally mumbled. Everyone else seemed quite amused. I don't know whether it was with Zoe's foul mouth or the fact that only JoAnn didn't know about Tom & Chloe.

Jeannie rushed in. “I'm sorry. So rude of me. Tom, this is my friend JoAnn.” I nodded. She hadn't twigged and I had no intention telling her in the crowded coffee shop.

“So how do you know.... who do you know?” JoAnn began, Jeannie cut her off.

“We went to school together. Arts.”

JoAnn nodded blankly. That still didn't explain why I ran into them at the coffee shop.

“And I came by to ask Tina about dinner plans.” Totally true. Zoe wasn't working that day and I was surprised to see her. I'm sure JoAnn took this as something else.

“So you & Tina?” she began to ask.

I shrugged “It's complicated.” Tina and Jeannie laughed. Zoe snorted.

“Usually is.” JoAnn muttered.

I knew Tina wouldn't spill until I told her it was OK, and I knew she'd keep Zoe quiet by any means necessary. I didn't mind JoAnn knowing, but I wanted to handle it in my own way. I just hadn't decided how yet. I knew this was not the place or time.

“Still.... you should come anyway. If there's no one at the ticket counters, ask one of the door guys. They'll find someone to take your money.” JoAnn laughed.

“So late is ok....” Tina mused aloud.

JoAnn shrugged. “A ticket's a ticket. Better than not coming at all.”

Tina nodded. “I wish I knew. I would've told Chloe....” she muttered, then turning to me, grinned “See that she gets the message, OK?” I smiled and nodded. Zoe snorted and Jeannie just followed our conversation with her eyes and a stupid grin.

JoAnn didn't seem to notice. “Why don't you just call her yourself?” she asked Tina.

We both responded in unison “It's complicated.” Zoe snorted. Jeannie squelched her laugh.

JoAnn shrugged. “Whatever. You should both come.” she said to me.

I smiled noncommittally. “We'll see. But right now, it's back to work.” I made my way to my bike and headed off for my next pickup.

As it turned out, I didn't go at all. My last run was a priority pickup at the far fringe of our service area, with the recipient at the other end of town. Normally we'd tag-team something like this and I would hand it off to a coworker in midtown, but it was near the end of the day and most had already come off their routes. Deirdre the dispatcher told me they were getting serious cash for this last minute priority run and I would be well compensated for my trouble. So I bore down and did the run. The recipient stayed open late to receive the package and seemed grateful and relieved. The desk guard handed me an envelope, saying 'for your trouble', and I knew it was a gratuity. I normally didn't accept tips, figuring it was a slippery slope of folks trying to 'jump the line' and prioritize their own items in the delivery queue. Still, after what I went through to get it delivered and how far it took me past my usual quitting time, I graciously accepted the envelope.

It was a crazy large tip. What I'd normally make in a day at both my jobs. I was happy to get it, but too exhausted to even think of what I'd want to do with the money. I just made my way home, peeled the day off me and drew a steaming, relaxing bath.

“I found her!” Tina yelled, startling me awake. I was instantly struck by how cold I was as by brain rebooted and I realized I must have fallen asleep in the tub. I opened the drain and ran the hot water to quickly raise the tub from tepid to toasty. The spray from the spigot also rejuvenated the bubbles from the bath oils, so I quickly regained some modesty sprawled in the tub as a leering Zoe joined us in the bathroom.

“Can't a person get a little privacy?” I mock pouted as Zoe came to stand beside a grinning Tina.

“Sure” grinned Tina. “Just don't fall asleep in a public place.”

“Naked” leered Zoe.

“This is NOT a public place!” I protested.

“No. It's a shared space.” smiled Tina.

“And you're hogging it.” grinned Zoe.

“Sorry.” I smiled apologetically. “I had a kind of brutal day and I wanted to soak out the kinks. I must have been more tired than I knew.” I shrugged.

“Don't talk to us about brutal after what we just witnessed.” Tina laughed.

My brain finally finished booting. “...right.... So how was Roller Derby?”

“Intense” Tina said at the same time Zoe blurted out “Awesome.” They turned to each other, grinning.

“So who won?” I grinned.

They looked at each other querulously, then both returned to face me and shrugged with a guilty smile.

“Were you not paying any attention?” I grinned at the two of them.

“Of course we were.” Zoe replied defensively. She then held up her hand and began counting off fingers. “There were at least two concussions. A broken shinbone and a couple of sprains.... had to be carried off the track. ...oh... and gallons of blood.” she beamed.

Tina shrugged. “I spent most of my time people watching.” she broke into a smile “I have enough material for a good few years of Plague Diaries.”

I laughed. “So maybe I made the right choice....”

“...falling asleep in the tub?” Tina raised an eyebrow.

I shrugged. “I obviously needed the rest...” I offered sheepishly.

Tina grunted a laugh.

“After the match, JoAnn suggested we call Chloe & all meet up for drinks” Tina said “but I begged off since I have early classes. Even Zoe didn't protest too much.” she grinned.

Zoe shrugged. “Yeah. It was a fun night. But I was done. I just wanted to get back to my room.” she tossed it off casually, but Tina and I exchanged glances.

Tina quickly regrouped. “Are you almost done here? Because I really need to pee.”

I smiled an apology and reached for a towel as Zoey proclaimed “screw THAT.” and spinning to the toilet, proceeded to whip down her jeans and plop down to loudly pee. Shooting me a grin, she said “if your delicate senses are offended, look away. I'm not waiting on you to haul yourself out of the tub so I can pee in peace. If you can't handle it, that's your problem.” she challenged.

I said nothing. I just stared into her eyes. “Do what you need to do. Not shocked. Not embarrassed. Not interested. Period.” I stood, taking subtle care to keep my ...incongruity... tucked back behind my tightly clenched legs.

Tina leaned in “You missed a really ….interesting... night.”

I quirked an eyebrow.

She waited for Zoe to finish and leave while I stood shivering in my towel.

“I'm not 100% sure, but I think JoAnn thinks ….I'm trans....” she whispered.

I cocked my head and stared at her blankly while I tried to process this. Finally I nodded.

“You met at Sous Vide with my other friends.... You & Jeannie hit it off and she invited you to go to Roller Derby with them.... She knows you share a house with Chloe...”

Tina nodded, grinning. “And Zoe – who is almost as wild as JoAnn....”

I nodded. “OK. I can see how she got there.”

“AND I think she thinks I'm dating Tom!” Tina smirked.

I jerked my head back like a startled chicken. I didn't see THAT coming. “What on earth gave you that impression?”

Tina said “remember back at Kool Beanz when you said... when TOM said... he came by to ask me about dinner...?” Her smile was mischievous.

I nodded, recalling the encounter.

Tina continued “And she asked 'So you and Tina....' and Tom replied.....”

“It's complicated.” I groaned and rolled my eyes.

“And SHE replied...” Tina said with a finger to the air and an expectant look....

I stared back at her blankly. I either hadn't heard or hadn't paid attention.

Realizing I was clueless, Tina stared me in the eyes and muttered “...always is.”

I felt the blood drain from my face. I was sure Tina was right. I groaned quietly.

Tina's laugh surprised me. “I know I always used to make fun of you for your 'It's complicated' catchphrase, but living with you, I'm beginning to understand. Your friend Jeannie's friend JoAnn, who I met at the club with Chloe and her friends.... thinks I'm dating TOM... who she doesn't know is Chloe... and may or may not know that I am transgender ...or so she thinks.” Tina grinned shaking her head.

“Forget Plague Diaries.... I want to start writing this!” she laughed.

I rolled my eyes. “My life is not fodder for your muse.” I grimaced. “Can we talk about this in the morning please?”

Tina smiled and nodded. “Oh, we WILL.... I've been itching to do something completely different from Plague Diaries.... to show that I have more than one story to tell.... more than one ….flavor.” She actually seemed to taste the word in her mouth and subtly nodded her approval with it. “It never occurred to me that the story could be taking place under my own roof!” she beamed.

I sighed. “Please. In the morning> I'm exhausted. We'll talk about it then.” I squeezed past her and padded to my room.
“Count on it!” she said loudly down the hall.

We'd have a lot to talk about in the morning. But at the moment, neither of us had any inkling of what lay ahead.

The smoke alarms startled us awake. I ran into the hall in my sleep tee and panties and was quickly joined by Tina in her large flannel shirt and fleece gym shorts. We stared at each other - each trying to bootstrap our brains. After a moment we noticed we were alone.

“Is Zoe here???” I shouted over the pulsing klaxon.

Tina shook her head and mouthed “I don't know” but we couldn't hear a thing over the painful din.

Using hand gestures as much as speech, I indicated I would check the alarm and urged her to check on Zoe.

Fortunately, I have a kind of OCD like obsession to know how things work, so it wasn't long after we moved in that I actually read the instruction manual for the sophisticated zoned alarm system. There was a panel in a utility closet near the washer/dryer that had the breaker box, various utility gizmos and the master alarm panel. I opened the front panel and muted the alarm. I instantly understood the phrase 'the silence was deafening'. My ears still rang from the painful klaxons, but my ears were so desensitized by the loud alarms, normal background sounds disappeared into the velvet mist below my assaulted threshold of hearing. I looked at the LED panel and saw the sensor that tripped the alarm; the master bedroom. Zoe's room. Maybe she left a hotplate or something on before she left? If she were still here, she would have joined us in the hall. I scowled at the thought that Tina and I would have to invade her privacy, if only to prevent burning down her father's house.

I went upstairs to find Tina banging at Zoe's room, calling loudly through the door.

“I don't think she's here.” She shrugged.

“No. I guess not. But the sensor that tripped the alarm is in that room.” I scowled, glancing at Zoe's door. “We have to break in.”

Tina didn't look any happier than I did. The door was locked. Of course. Not that either of us had ever even tried it before, but we couldn't imagine Zoe ever leaving her private space unlocked.

No surprise we made little progress with the door. Neither of us was built to Kool-Aid Smash through the door, sending splinters flying. I had already grabbed a fire extinguisher, presuming we may need it for whatever we found on the other side.

I held my hand to the door, feeling for heat. I'd seen too many movies where a fireball explodes as people break through and the fresh air causes a violent flare of a starving conflagration. The door seemed cool, so Tina and I took turns battering it with the fire extinguisher. Zoe would be really angry we broke into her room, and her father would be angry that we destroyed his fancy wooden door, but maybe his anger would be tempered if we managed to save his fancy house.

We shattered a hole small enough to fit an arm through, Tina felt her way around and undid the deadbolt, and finally we got the door opened.

And rushed into the room with the extinguisher - only to stop cold.