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The VA has trans support, kinda, sorta. Sometimes it might be just a title. I actually love every single person, doctors, nurses, staff, I have dealt with at the VA. There is a caveat there. The VA rotates doctors as they move, retire, etc. I had excellent doctors until one of those rotations. The doctor I was assigned was a hard core major in the service. She never said anything offensive, however she acted like I was something she picked up on her boots on the walk through the cow lot after she found out I was trans. Shortest doctor visits I ever experienced as she couldn't get me back out of her office fast enough.
I felt like telling her I didn't have anything catching and if I did, wasn't she supposed to be taking care of that? But I didn't. I did mention to the Patient Advocate my doctor didn't want to get close to me or touch me. I was rotated out as one of her patients by my next visit. I wrote a very nice letter to admin, included a picture of me in a dress suit. I wrote I wouldn't be showing up as such as my intent in life was to make sure everyone around me was as comfortable as possible. If acceptable, I'd present myself as androgynous. If not acceptable, please let me know as I appreciated everything they had done and I would fit in, whatever it took for others to feel comfortable around me. Of course I signed the letter. And then signed it a second time so there wouldn't be any second guessing. My next visit, word must have got passed around. Staff, nurses, doctors asked me how I wanted to be addressed and everyone was more than polite. Barbie was the usual first name they addressed me as but it isn't the name on my military records. Again I told everyone whatever name they wanted to use as I really wanted them to be comfortable with me. They would usually drop back to the name on my military records about the forth of fifth time. Which was more than fine with me.
Now we get to the gist of my last visit. As a fore mentioned, the VA has trans resources and support. One must research or stumble across this info but it's there. Six months back I found the Amarillo VA does have such support. It is bundled in with Suicide Prevention Counseling. "can everyone hear me moan, GREAT" Found who my rep would be, her VA office address, and sent...? let's just say a hell of a lot of years of personal medical data and four, eight by ten glossies of different times and poses and requesting a meeting. That meeting was yesterday. A very long and nice visit and a kind of a realization shock. There was so much data on trans this lady kept asking me to clarify I realized I was her first trans. She was nice, polite, and easy to converse with. I'm wondering how our meeting went as she has to turn in her report up the chain of VA medical support for trans? I don't need the VA for medical trans meds or doctors. I have very supportive doctors and necessaries in OKC. My goal is make it easier for those who follow me. What I wasn't ready for was meeting someone in the VA who is there to support trans and she was so clueless as to all the meds, terminology, and personal issues trans have or will have if they themselves weren't already knowledgeable.
Okay, I'm still good. My primary care doc has been on board with me as the OKC Women's Trust Clinic has been forwarding medical data and charts out to her at the Amarillo VA. This is a first for her too but she has been a total sweetheart all the way. Sometimes I know she is bending the rules for me. What I want all the vets logged onto the BCTS to know is the support is there even if one has to ferret it out themselves. Not every VA Center is clueless. Dallas has been tuned in for years. Lots of luck getting an appointment there though. Backlog out the wazoo. San Fran is in too. The one in Georgia was twenty or more years back. Haven't researched them since then. Even if you aren't a vet or you know someone who is, you might pass the knowledge along. The thing is, once one's meds and needs is in the system it is good at virtually every VA. Thus a trip to San Fran VA could possibly result in Backwater USA VA providing so one only had to make that long distance trip one time.
All I ask is please play nice, be respectful and polite. I've seen and heard vets ragging on the nurses, doctors, staff and kind of understand but don't. The doctors and staff have nothing to do with the rules and regulations. Maybe that vet was hurt in one of those hellacious wars we always seem to be fighting but the doctors and staff had nothing to do with any of that. As far as I am concerned, my government doesn't owe me a thing. I'm glad the VA is there, I'd be out on the street with a tin cup selling pencils if they weren't. Provided I was still alive. Some of those medical procedures are unbelievably costly.
Can't believe they referred me to suicide counseling for trans support...? She sent me home with a VA suicide packet and bag even after I told her of my training and credentials. Had to be a Monty Python Skit. I see I need to try and educate a few more unfortunate souls. Politely of course. LOL, have fun with life or go crazy with the insanity running amuck in this world.
always,
Barb
Life is a gift. Treasure it until it's time to return it.
Comments
Asked about the pictures
There is only "ONE" first impression. No retakes, no do overs, once done that opportunity for First Impression will never be again for that person or those people. There is no way I can compete with poses or pictures taken to present all my best. Think of movie stars, actresses, real life and their pictures. If possible, I always advance a photo of myself before a face to face meeting. First Impressions. No matter what happens afterwards, that first impression is forever in one's mind. The human mind and memory is funny that way.
This isn't an approach for everyone to try. It is up to each individual how they wish to meet someone for the first contact, first time. Personally, I try and make that first impression the best I can whether in reality or a photo. I won't get a second chance.
always,
Barb
Life is meant to be lived, not worn until it's worn out.
Oklahoma born and raised cowgirl
BarbieLee
Your entire blog reeks . . . of niceness.
Your thoughts constantly run to compassion for those around you and those who will follow you.
I would be in favor of human cloning if we can keep it to clones of just you.
Given the stats for trans-suicides (four of ten young trans attempt versus less than 1% for general public) the concern for suicide seems valid. At least you weren't offered conversion therapy. . .yet.
When I hear Elizabeth Warren and Bernie Sanders talk about Government healthcare for all I shudder. Yet - given your level of overall satisfaction -- maybe it wouldn't be the pox on us it would seem to be.
Jill
Angela Rasch (Jill M I)
There are so many Jill's words apply
Blush, thank you Jill. But in reality hon, I am the least among so many of you who are so kind and giving to so many others. I'm not naming names and the amazing part is all of you don't understand how much each of you have so selflessly shared and given of your time, your lives to others.
Jill has given her time, shared her talent with the kids on and off the playing fields, with business associates, etc. She even helped me paint my house..., red. Small joke, forgive me Jill, sometimes I can't help myself.
There is a lady who has given her whole life to her family, her neighbors, her friends, asking for nothing in return. Her heart and soul is so big, so understanding, she accepts others as they are. Hugs again Sarah, love you.
So many it would take me a month or more to name them all, have given a part of themselves, their time, among other things. There are artists and talented musicians on BCTS most here don't even know about. All the writers who post on BCTS and so many other places share a piece of their lives as they post their stories, transporting us readers away from the real world for a little while into their own worlds. It goes without saying all the girls and guys who keep BCTS and so many other sites up and running are among those who give beyond measure.
Jill, I never really liked you girl, but if you loan me that misty sea green dress you wore to Niccolo Boshensky's Ball..., I might be persuaded to change my mind. I hated you the minute you walked into the ballroom wearing that dress. You were so beautiful and that dress..., I'd swear it was made of woven cloud. That night I wanted to ask to borrow it. The men crush you had surrounding you all night I never got the chance.
Now, my friendship can be bough..., I mean we are friends aren't we? What other knock their socks off dresses do you have in your closet? Girlfriend
hugs doll
always,
Barb
Oklahoma born and raised cowgirl