For a while there, my mind was filled with stories that begged to be written. If anything, my problem was that I didn't have time to convert the stories in my head into narratives that would make sense to a reader. (IMHO, that's the real work of writing.) So my disk is filled with half-written stories. A lot of them, of course, I never intended to post, they were just to express and perhaps feel better about the pain and confusion I live with.
But somewhen, the stories went away. It happened sometime after I went full-time, a year and a half ago. It's true, I'm still struggling with my life; some of it has to do with adjusting to living as a woman with the psyche and body that I have, some of it with the PTSD I still carry around from 50-60 years ago and am now (I hope) on the road to healing from. But I was struggling a lot more before I went full-time, and the stories came to me then.
It's not just writing, either. I used to feel almost a compulsion to play music. Guitar, flute, piano, and everything from classical to pop songs. Music is for me a route into my soul which bypasses all the mishegoss that life has glued to me. But now it doesn't work for me. I sit down to play a piece on the piano, or something on the guitar, and all I feel is a vague desire to go and read the telephone book instead. It's almost like losing the will to live.
Muse, did I do something to drive you away? Is there something I can do to encourage you to return? All the color has gone out of life since you are gone, all is dark and grey and dirty.
Muse, please come back to me.
Comments
hugs, hon
i hope your muse comes back. hugs!
Factors Interfering With Creativity ...
From 2003 to 2011, I was fairly prolific, but in 2011 I was greatly surprised to become associated with the Mormons, and I stopped writing. Happily in 2017 I finally got shed of them, finally realizing how idiotic I was being. I've started writing some again, but now the political insanity in this country is quite alarming to me.
My latest two stories were done to provide radical distraction from all that and it is my intention to write more.
I too have PTSD, gotten mainly by a very insane childhood, though I am also a Vietnam Era Veteran. For me, my experience in the Army was the first stability I'd had in my life.
I do hope that you are once again to find the comfort that writing can give.
XXX
Gwen
Shall we have a contest?
I refuse to post any story, regardless of length, that isn't already complete on my hard drive. Consequently I have 18 unfinished stories languishing there. Two of them were started in the last three months. Of the remaining, four I still consider "a work in progress." That is to say, I still know where I want to go with them, it's just getting the urge to write them. So, a total of six have some life in them. The rest???? Who knows.
All is not lost, I could easily finish some of them. One of my better pieces, if kudos mean anything, "Dumb Bet" spent a year and a half in that condition and then one day I got a wild hair and finished it up on a couple of days.
Hugs
Patricia
Happiness is being all dressed up and HAVING some place to go.
Semper in femineo gerunt
Ich bin eine Mann
Only 18 unfinished?
I have close to 100 (guestimate) going back to 2010. Many will never go anywhere as I wrote myself into a dead end or realised that the plot line would not work or was too way out there for any site let alone this place.
That is the way of things for many writers. You get a whiff of an idea and you try it out and before you know it, you have written 3,000 words of utter tripe. Better luck next time then.
Samantha
Trying to help...
Hey Asche,
on some issues, I can't help. Frankly speaking, I can not relate due to missing experience. That's why I won't offer to advise there.
However, I do have some experience of waking a muse. Or two. Maybe even three. Or a whole freaking army of them. Be careful what you wish for. Here are my go-to methods.
- Go read. A lot!
- Are you already doing that? Try reading different genres. Most of all genres you normally don't read.
- Read magazines. And again, try to stick to magazines you normally don't read. In this day and age, there are many hobby focused magazines. They offer glimpses into areas unknown to you.
- Libraries have a ton on technical books. Medieval building styles, a picture book of the Spanish Riviera, an atlas of demographic maps, and the list goes on.
- Visit shops you normally don't. Especially shops catering to specific hobbies. (For someone who doesn't fish, I spend a surprising amount in fishing shops...)
- Take a break from writing, while doing research. Don't force yourself to write when you are running on fumes.
- Google "writing prompts". Not everything will lead you to a TG story, but exercising your writing muscles can help too.
- Rewrite old stories. Break a story down you wrote earlier. Throw out all established characters and imagine new ones. How will these new characters shift the same story plot?
- Some credit working as an editor for other writers as a medium of inspiration and personal growth.
I hope this short list offers some help.
Hugs and kisses,
Cassy
Sending hugs your way.
I can all too easily understand what it's like to wonder where the hell the muse went. I've been there myself, last year I had three different times where my muse took off without any notice whatsoever for more than a month, leaving me hanging off the proverbial cliff.
Luckily, mine came back each time from her wanderings, with nary an explanation, usually throwing ideas at me at hurricane speed.
I'm not sure if I could cope with having my muse wander off for that long. Writing and posting here is helping me to stay on an even keel.
I'm intently hoping that your lost muse returns soon, and thus I am sending some hugs along as a temporary comfort in the meantime.