First off I do need to say this, I attend an amazingly accepting church here in the Tampa Bay region, and have been for five years. When I first started my transition I had been struggling really hard, not just gaining acceptance, but also of accepting myself... The Unity I found was my turning point, and in many ways probably saved my life... I even have been singing in the choir now for over 4 years, even if the best I can do is tenor, curse you puberty for making me a natural deep bass!!! (Hah). We actually performed this last Sunday and after the service this happened... By the way, I’m also the only TG person there (at least that is openly TG that I know of).
I was talking to one of the prayer chaplains after the service, a super sweet older lady (well at least a good bit older than my 45 years), when she said something to me... I know it was a compliment but I usually detest the direction the conversation started to go... It’s one I’ve had many, many times, and personally I don’t see it... She told me, “I think you are the strongest and bravest person I’ve ever met... I wish I could be as strong as you are.”
I hate being called brave, or strong... Cause I truly don’t think I am stronger, or braver than anyone else. I wasn’t rude to her at all, but I thought I would ‘straighten’ her out nicely, so to speak. I was only trying to explain how she is just as strong as I am, and I gave her plenty of reasons and examples why. One of those examples could apply to anyone reading this at this very moment... If you look back at every ‘challenge’ that each one of you have faced to this point, that means you have survived 100% of what life has thrown at you to this point... The next time something happens that makes you question if you can make it through it, look back at your track record so far... 100% is a pretty dang good track record... As we were talking our new minister came up and listened in for a bit... At the end of the conversation, the chaplain was wiping her eyes from the tears that had formed, and she told me that I needed to be up there (the pulpit) sharing...
So that’s when I got asked to do the something I’m not too sure about... I was asked if I could make a 20-25min talk, send it in to her to evaluate it... If they like and approve of what I come up with, they want me to lead a service... I really don’t know how I feel about this... I’m honored, and kind of excited... I’m also scared poopless... While I’ve talked at a few churches in the past since I ‘came out’, I am NOT a public speaker of any kind... So my thoughts and emotions are kind of in a whirlwind at the moment...
I think I’m going to try to go through with this, but I’m not going to lie... I’m pretty terrified.
Becca C.
Comments
Increasing acceptance
If I don't take this to a PM, the non-religious among us may make this about them and then we'll see very heated replies. I don't actually care if or what anyone else believes; even if it is in a three headed Toad. The only reason I am replying is that I see more and more acceptance of T folk, and some of it is quite strong.
Most folk are aware that T folk have quite a high suicide rate, and it is likely increased in this present political climate. I've had a similar experience to yours, and have been told to get ready to speak for T folk in the public venue. My issue is that I am not shy and have to fight being narcissistic. Some of you know that sometimes being nice is not my strong suit.
I'm thankful that many "regular people" are coming forward in our defense.
Please try to relax. If you are supposed to speak you will.
Gwen
that's awesome hon
you can do it, we believe in you!
What would I do if i were asked
Becca
Not sure what I would do if I were asked to do something similar, and I know it will not happen.
The choice I know is yours and I love you for who you are the individual who has had her challenges to get to where you are today.
Their is obvious support from your Minister and Prayer Chaplin and they would not do anything to harm you or those close to you.
For others to accept you, you have to accept who you are yourself.
Love and Hugs to you Becca
Sam
SamanthaAnn
I know very little about Religion but.....
I am not a believer of any religion however I will never mock or belittle those that do believe in a god.
So my thoughts - relevant as they may be - on this is that Your God (speaking through the minister) for some reason want's you to speak to His people.
Not just anyone but YOU so he knows your doubts and misgivings but still for some reason best known to Him want's this to
happen so for good or ill it's down to you and your faith in Him. The minister is going to proof read your reading and guide you
Do it!
I want to encourage you to do this. There are many reasons for it. Perhaps the most important is that you will give an account of how you see on your own life so far and in a way where you do not need to ARGUE, just to tell. The second is that your info, given in this way, will tell first ONE person about the reason and the feelings that made you aware of your life will know it better. And there is some kind of rule that say that we have about 8 persons around us that we share important information with. In that way your information has reached 9 persons. Should your story then meet the good acceptance from the pastor /?/ you will have sent the true story to a much larger amount of persons. One example of this happened here in Sweden. About 15 years ago when I had my transition, the few TV-channels we had back then all wanted to have a program about transsexualism. All of them were really good, some even more "clinical" than most of the public could follow, but this made perhaps 40% of the inhabitants understand that we were no threat to Society but a group that want to be accepted as all other. Of course there were some religious negative comment, but that was looked upon as "automatic" reactions. I never met any negative reactions.
I wish you all luck and my full encouragement, If you want to contact me send a message here and you will get my persona e-mali address..
Ginnie
GinnieG
You are speaking for EVERY TG and ALL individuals
Becca, hon, if you are in church sharing your life, then you are a spokesperson for everyone who believes whether you see it that way or not. I'd love to have a recording of your sermon when you stand before all those people, your knees knocking, your throat dry, your mind blank as you forgot everything you were prepared to say. But then it all comes back when the Holy Ghost fills your soul and you are no longer alone as hundreds of thousands, millions? are given a voice because you shared in your own gentle, loving words.
You are one God has anointed to speak for so many who have manged to make it and yes even those who haven't. I beg you to not shun this load which has been placed on your heart.
And when someone says, "You saved my life." I answer, "No, it was God who saved you for I am not capable of saving anyone. I shared His love for all His creation. One of which you are special because He gave you a double blessing of boy and girl very few receive."
If you don't mind, I'm going to copy and save your post. Sometimes I forget, we aren't the only ones struggling for a life in a world most want to believe God made a mistake.
Life is a gift, treasure it until it's time to return it
always,
Barb
Oklahoma born and raised cowgirl
A call on your life
I to attend a very accepting church. My pastor knows about my T status and while I butch up my appearance for church and church functions, I'm not totally in stealth. If your church leaders want you to share, then by all means do it.
From what I can understand from your account of the conversation, they aren't asking you to chronicle your T journey or speak on any aspect of being T. What they are looking for is 20 to 25 minutes of edifying the congregation in their times of struggle by looking at the times they've come through times of trial only to emerge on the other side whole and stronger.
It's a common theme for sermons. There are a multitude of teaching on it. I think what they are looking for is a fresh person's take on it so that the congregation will listen to one of their own and take it to heart.
Go for it.
Hugs
Patricia
Happiness is being all dressed up and HAVING some place to go.
Semper in femineo gerunt
Ich bin eine Mann
I've gotten the same commen
My answer, not brave just desperate.