Author's Note:My sincere apologies for taking this long for a new chapter. If you saw my blog, you'd have seen that due to my daughters joining softball at school, I've ended up being drafted into softball as well. I hope to do better, but I can't make any promises right now. Hope you enjoy. ~Rebecca

Belle woke early the next morning suddenly, she had been having a really good dream, until the dream twisted on her and had jarred her wake. As she clutched her chest and was trying to catch her breathe a nurse came in quickly to the room.

“Miss, are you okay?”, the nurse asked.

Belle nodded, and between her deep breaths, said, “Yeah I think so… I was having a dream and it… I guess it turned into a nightmare…”

The nurse didn’t look too convinced, so she came over and started checking her vitals, “Well we were at the desk and suddenly your heart rate jumped pretty drastically. You set off more than one alarm young lady.”, she said, smiling to let the girl know she was just teasing. “Do you want to talk about it?”

Smiling softly at the nurse, being grateful for her using humor in trying to calm her down, Belle responded, “Not really… It was just a dream. It didn’t really make much sense anyway.”

The nurse comforted her, “Most dreams don’t… Since you’re awake, how about I get your breakfast coming. After you eat we can see about getting you disconnected and moved out of here.”

Smiling, Belle told her, “That sounds good.”

The nurse joked, “Which one? Breakfast or getting out of here?”

Excitedly, the girl said, “Both.”

The nurse chuckled as she finished taking her vitals and then left Belle to her thoughts, which quickly drifted back to the strange dream. She remembered the dream vividly, but parts were fading faster than others, some though felt burned in her memory. The dream felt like a memory than a dream, not that she had many memories to compare it to. She remembered kissing her… husband? He felt like a husband, at least in the dream. While familiar to her, he was older than her, which didn’t make any sense. She did remember feeling happy, happier than she could remember, but then again, she could only remember a couple of days… What jarred her awake was that in the dream she was getting ready to go out on a date with her husband, and when she looked in the mirror to check their appearance before walking out the door was what caused it. She distinctly remembered seeing two guys in the mirror, with her being one of them. She was deep in thought, trying to understand the dream and what it was about when Jessica walked in the door with her breakfast.

“Good morning.”, Jess said as she greeted her young patient. Suddenly she saw, or felt, the discomfort in the young girl, “Belle are you okay?”

Realized she was caught thinking about the dream, she tried to brush it off and looked up at her doctor and smiled, at least the smile was natural. There was something comforting about Jess that made it easy for her to smile, “I’m okay, I just had a weird nightmare I guess… I was just trying to make some sense of it before it faded away. Which most of it has, it’s probably why it doesn’t make any sense to me.”

While Jessica couldn’t read the girl’s mind, she could read feel her emotions, and she knew the girl was lying. Not wanting to draw more attention to the dream, she tried to distract her with the plate of food. “Well I special ordered this, figure since this is a celebration meal, we could use with a good tasty breakfast instead of the stuff they’ve been sending up here.”

That caused the young girl to laugh heartily, “Okay, I don’t mind. What are we celebrating though?”

Jess pointed at her and said, “Someone is going to be getting out of here, just as soon as she eats her breakfast.

Giggling at that, Belle exclaimed, “Well then what are we waiting for, bring that tray over here!”

Laughing with her, Jess moved the tray and bed into position, so the girl could eat. Watching her, Jess was relieved, the girl seemed to have forgotten whatever was bothering her about the dream. Keeping a careful eye on the girl and her emotions, Jess sat down on the bed next to Belle while she ate, and just visited with her like an old friend. Strangely to the young girl and her lack of memories, Jessica was one of her oldest friends, even after only knowing her for two days.

A little over an hour later, the nurses wheeled Belle out of the ICU and into a regular room. To Belle’s surprise, her mother had kept her word and was waiting in the room when she came through the door. Mrs. Riley jumped up and tried to help the orderly, but quickly decided to stay out of his way. Once the bed was in place and the orderly had left, her mother sat down and wrapped her daughter in a hug.

“How’s my sweet girl doing this morning?”, she asked.

Smiling at her mom, she said, “A lot better now.” Holding her arms out so her mom could see, “Look I only look like a used pincushion and not one currently being used.”

Smiling at her daughter’s good mood, she responded, “That’s good to know, also they said that since you’ve been able to keep solid food down, that once you prove that everything is working as it should, that you can come home.”

Confused, Belle asked, “What do you mean if everything is working?”

Laughing gently, but semi uncomfortable about the subject, she told her daughter, “Well once you can pee and poop without difficulty, we can get you home. They also said that you’ll need to build your strength enough that you can walk, but Dr. Raphael seems convinced that you’re strong enough. You know, she has a lot of faith in you.”

Belle nodded, “I know she does… I feel like she’s more of a friend though than my doctor… Is that weird?”

Her mother shook her head, “No it isn’t, she’s been here since you were brought in, and she’s been here every time I have… I honestly don’t think she takes any time off.”, she said jokingly.

“I’m glad that she’s been here, she’s helped me a lot…” Belle started to say before she felt her stomach rumble. She gently placed her hand on her stomach, then looked back up to her mother. “It looks like I get to prove that everything’s working sooner than later. Could you help me up?”

Her mom looked at her worriedly, “Do you want me to get a nurse?”

Belle shook her head, “No I feel fine, other than I need to… umm… go…”

Mrs. Riley gently helped her swing her legs around and moved her into a sitting position. “Are you sure you don’t want me to get someone?”

“Mom, I’m fine… Just give me a hand okay?”, Belle told her.

With her mom holding her hand for support, Belle gently slid her bare feet onto the floor and slowly slid off the bed putting most of her weight on her legs while still leaning against the bed. She wobbled a bit, but her legs didn’t feel the least bit weak, just uncoordinated. She stood there for a few moments, then looked at her mother’s worried expression. Smiling at her mom, “See I’m fine, my legs don’t feel weak in the least. My balance though is a bit off…” She then pushed off of the bed and stood to her full height and stretched.

Slightly more relieved her mother told her, “Okay, but don’t try and overdo it.”

Other than her balance being slightly off, Belle felt good, and the stretch felt heavenly. She glanced over at her mom and something struck her as being off. It took her a moment to place what felt wrong before she realized and asked, “Did I shrink or something? I remember feeling taller than this.”

“Umm, no you haven’t shrunk. You’re the same height as normal, you’re still only about an inch taller than me.” Mrs. Riley tried to tell her.

“Okay… If you say so…”, Belle half-heartedly stated. It really bothered her, even though she couldn’t remember anything about herself, she did vividly remember her mother… She also remembered having to always look down at her... Trying to brush that thought out of her head, she nodded to her mother, “Let’s do this.”

Her mother nodded, “Okay but at the first sign of you getting tired, we call for help.” Belle nodded to her, and her mother said, “Ok then, I’m just waiting for you.”

She took her first hesitant step, and like she had noticed just standing there, that her balance felt ‘off’. Not bad enough for her to be dizzy or bad enough for her to fall, but just enough to be noticeable. As she took her next step, then her next, she realized the balance issue was just probably from her being bedridden for as long as she had been. In the same thought; she realized that she shouldn’t be walking this easily either. Trying not to think of any of those things though, she kept placing one foot in front of the other. Each step she had to rely less and less on her mother’s hand, and by the time she was in the bathroom she was almost walking by herself. As she sat down to do her business, her mother stayed close by, which made it extremely difficult for her to get started. Eventually she did, and as amazing as it was that she could walk so easily, there weren’t any complications with this either.

After she flushed and stood up, she moved to the sink to wash her hands, all without her mother’s assistance. “See Mom I’m okay.”, she said trying to reassure her mother.

Mrs. Riley just stared on in amazement, softly she said, “It really is a miracle… Thank you God…” She then noticed the panic-stricken expression on her daughter’s face as she stared into the mirror. “Baby what’s wrong?”, she blurted out.

Belle just stared at her reflection in shock and amazement. She thought she would at least recognize her face, since she had recognized her mother so easily. She softly gasped, “This is me? I mean… This doesn’t look or feel right… This can’t be me… Can it?”

Moving over to stand behind her daughter, she looked at the reflection of the young lady in the reflection. While the swelling had gone down, there were still some slight bruising around one of her eyes, and even with one side of her hair cut off, she could still see her beautiful daughter. Softly she told her, “Sweetie I know this is hard, but yes this is you. Don’t worry about the bruising, it will go away, and your hair will grow back out… Maybe we can go and see about getting you a wig or something to cover that up… You are still my beautiful girl…”

The words didn’t have the effect her mother had intended, Belle slowly examined her face looking for anything that might spark a memory… She noticed her high cheekbones, her pale blue eyes, her full soft lips, with her dainty little nose… She was beautiful, she saw that… It just wasn’t her, or at least what she thought she’d look like. She then looked at her hair, turning to the right she saw the soft honey blonde shoulder length hair, it still had that wrong feeling to her. She then turned to her left and saw where they had had to cut her hair for her surgery. After two weeks the scar was very faint, and while her hair was slightly more than an inch long on that side, it definitely wasn’t honey blond… It was a much lighter blonde, almost white depending on how the light hit it.

Turning her head back and forth looking at her hair, she finally said, “No, can we just cut all this off, so it will at least match?” For some reason the idea of having short hair seemed more comfortable to her. She then also asked, “Did I dye my hair this color?”

Her mom shook her head, “No you didn’t that’s your natural color… Or at least it was… I had asked about that while you were… asleep. The doctors told me that a severe shock could possibly cause your hair to lighten that, they also said the head trauma could be why your eyes lightened up as well… Are you sure you want to cut it off? You’ve always loved your long hair…”

Belle nodded, the thought of having long hair and having to deal with all that, almost made her shudder. The mention of her eyes also changing somehow made her look closer, her eyes were blue, but like her hair, how pale they were didn’t sit right with her either… Turning away from the mirror, it was causing her more grief right now than she had expected. She had thought to have recognized herself like she had her mother, but all she saw was a stranger. She softly asked, “Can I get back to my bed?”

“Of course.”, her mother said. She reached out to grasp Belle’s hand to help her, but as lost in thought as her daughter was, she didn’t see it and just walked normally to her bed and sat down. Worriedly, she asked, “Belle? Are you okay?”

She had been in such deep thought, she realized she had forgotten her mother was even in the room, “Yeah… No… Mom I don’t know… Why could I recognize you so easily, but can’t recognize myself… Why am I such a stranger to myself…”, she said before she hung her head down as the tears started to streak down her cheeks.

Quickly, her mother rushed to her and wrapped her arms around her distraught daughter. She kept whispering to her that she’d be okay as she held her. Her daughters despair was breaking her heart, even with how much Belle had changed in the last few years, this reminded her of when Belle was much younger. It was like having her baby girl back in her arms, but seeing and feeling Belle this upset, it didn’t take her long at all to start crying with her. She held on to her daughter until she felt her relax, she almost let her go until she realized that she had cried herself until she had passed out. It took a lot, but she was able to slide her into her bed and get her covered up. Seeing that Belle was sleeping somewhat peacefully, she laid her head down on the bed and continued to cry, until her tears eventually dried up.

“Mrs. Riley? Are you okay?”, Jessica asked as she had come into the room.

Shaken out of her deep train of thought, she forced herself to smile as she looked up at the doctor, “Yes, I’m okay…” Her voice then trailed off as her smile faltered, as the feeling of helplessness at being able to help her daughter resurfaced.

Jess frowned, “No, you’re not… Mrs. Riley…” She started to say before she was interrupted.

“Please call me Jill… With all you’ve done for Belle, calling me Mrs. is just… Too impersonal…”, Jill told her.

“Okay, Jill then… Let me check on Belle, and then why don’t we go and get some coffee too.”, Jess told her softly. She knew that something serious was on Jill’s mind, she hoped that, getting her alone that Jill might open up to her. She wanted to help, but she also needed information.

“Okay, but I want to be here when she wakes up… She was pretty upset earlier…” Jill responded.

Jess nodded, then went to check on Belle. She pretended to check her pulse, and even though the young girl was asleep Jess could feel the turmoil in her. She wasn’t conscious, but the emotions were still there in her subconscious. She ensured Jill couldn’t see her eyes, as she calmed Belle down the only way she knew. Finally, she said, “She’s going to sleep for a while, let’s go on downstairs.”

Reluctantly Jill stood up and took a long look at her daughter, it appeared she was sleeping peacefully at the moment. She went over and softly kissed her daughter’s forehead, then turned to Jess, “Ok, but just one cup of coffee. Then I’m coming back up here. Jessica agreed and then the two ladies left the room and the young girl sleeping.

Fifteen minutes later, the two women had their cups of coffee and had found an out of the way booth in the hospitals cafeteria. It was still early for the lunch crowd, so the place was mostly devoid of people. After several long moments, Jess was the first to speak.

“Mrs., I mean Jill… I know you’re not doing okay. I’d like to help, if I can.”, the doctor told her.

Jill paused for several moments, finally she responded, “I know you do… You’ve already done so much for Belle…”

“Jill, I’m going to be blunt here. I care about Belle, I really do. I want to see her get past this, but that means that you need to be okay also, so you can be there for her. She’s going to need you.”, Jess told her as she gently took Jill’s hand and gave it a gently squeeze.

Jill sighed, “I know she will. I just don’t know if I’ll be enough for her… Especially since…” Jill paused, unsure why she almost blurted out the thought that she couldn’t get to go away.

Jess felt how insecure she was, but was afraid to push her too much, so she tried a different approach. “Belle’s body is pretty much healed, other than some superficial bruising there isn’t much the hospital can do. With her amnesia, she’s going to need help to get past this.”

Frustrated, Jill blurted out, “What if I don’t… What if I can’t help her?”

Giving her hand another gentle squeeze, Jess told her softly, “You’re not alone in this. Your family needs to help you as well. Your husband and other daughter will help you.”

Shaking her head, Jill muttered, “I don’t see them helping her…”

Frowning Jess asked, “Why not?”

Jill wanted to tell the doctor but thinking of why they wouldn’t, made her thoughts return to what had originally upset her. “It’s just that… Belle and her sister… They really didn’t see eye to eye very often, the same goes with my husband.”

Jess was surprised with that news, she had known that Steven had gotten along great with his family, at least when he was still in school. Belle’s history should have been the same, she needed to know more, but didn’t want to press too much since it was obviously upsetting her even more. “Okay then, how about her friends. They can help her too…”

With that Jill started to softly cry, “No… Her new friends aren’t really the helping type…”

Really confused now and needing answers, Jess asked with another squeeze of her hand, “Jill you need to tell me what’s really going on if you want to really help Belle.”

With tears running down her cheeks, she blurted out. “Jess… The Belle you’ve gotten to know isn’t the one that left the house the night of the accident… She has changed so much over the last few years. Oh god, you’re going to think I’m a horrible parent…”

Jess tried to console her, afraid that she might have pushed too hard, “Jill I’ll never think that, I promise. You’ve been here every day, and almost every waking moment to keep an eye on your daughter. If she hopes to regain any of her memories, she’s going to need you Jill.”

Jill, reaching her breaking point, “That’s just it! Don’t you understand?!? I don’t want her to ever regain her memories!”

 
 
To be continued.