Who Was I - Query

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Last month, I went back and took a look at the first few chapters I posted on this story... Needless to say, I was less than happy with what I read. (How did you all say such kind things about it?) (Why did I look? I was thinking of revising it as more of a mainstream story. (I don't know that it's worth the effort though.)

I was wondering if the dozen or so of you that read the whole thing would like to see it "revised" and updated (in place?) or leave it as is. It occurred to me that cleaning it up would make reading it easier on those that might come to read it in the future.

Second question... I had a couple of short story plots that take place in parallel and/or conjunction with the base story that are hinted at in the main story (One being the PI's story). Is there any interest in me taking the time to write said side stories and posting them?

It's likely that if I were to undertake this, it might slow down Hidden Gifts to some extent... But not a LOT. No more than the bits of other writing I undertake now and again (none of which have been posted anywhere).

I'd like to hear any thoughts any of you might have on this...

Thanks,

Annette

Comments

Who Was I?

I enjoyed the story. If you want to spend more time on it, I would rather see more story than see it cleaned up. There are still a few unanswered questions. What was in the captule? What was it supposed to do? How did they work together in what was essentially a dream? How do they finish each others' sentences? Are the above two connected?

By the way, I'm really enjoying Hidden Gifts.

Ray

It was a very nice story.

Well, dear, I am not sure what you are dissatisfied about. I thought the writing was engaging; feeling like the main character was doing some inner searching along the way, but also being mindful of how much he loved his wife and children. I was astonished at how well his wife stuck with him. It was heart warming to me because of my own hellish experience. It is the way my own should have gone, and I'd have been much more certain about the outcome.

Someone has been encouraging me to rework one of my stories, and since we have started talking about it, I notice that I have not written a stroke. In the last few days, I have been thinking about what I am trying to accomplish when I write a story.

I write because I have a story to tell. If it is not letter perfect, that does not bother me much. Now, I see what my coach is trying to get across to me and I will try to make future work better, but right now I am feeling like I do not want to re do stories.

Many Blessings

Gwendolyn

Nice work

I've only read the first few chapters but your writing draws me into the narrative so that I want to read more. That's a rare skill so give yourself a pat on the back. Your dialog is better than mine, but the master of printed conversation is Angharad so you might look over Easy as Falling ... for more ideas and story flow.

If you're still unhappy with it set your story aside for a few weeks and then go over it again. One writing instructor suggested that I read what I had written out loud to myself. Sometimes that helps when no one else is around.

Don't give up. You've got the makings!

marie c.

marie c.