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I think I might be at the breaking point.
I just spent the better part of the last two hours bawling my eyes out, and I hope to post this before the real breakdown starts.
I just called my mom for the first time in over a month, and guess what? I'm being served papers on my credit card I cut up months ago. Here I am haven't had money to buy f-king FOOD in two weeks, and I'm getting served. I'm not always sure I'll even have a place to sleep, and then this.
It's all my fault, I'm stupid and bad with money
Comments
I don't know what to say . . .
. . . but I hope that you can get it sorted out and that you don't go off the rails.
Money IS the root of all evil and whilst it is perhaps easy for me to say that as I currently have an income, it hasn't always been like this.
I shan't bore you with my story, but suffice it to say I have been there and I know how it feels.
Please try to be strong and try to believe that it can be sorted and hopefully it will be.
Hugs
NB
I'm not bad. I'm just drawn that way.
Bad with money?
I was using credit cards for self soothing and in February finally filed for Bankruptsy. It was very easy, and helped me to re-start my life. I live in Oregon. I don't know what state you are in but it may be the best option for you.
I live very frugally too. Sometimes I run out of money and get into eating bizarre things. Are there public resources out there to help you?
Please keep us posted. Try to hang in there. :)
Gwendolyn
yep, been there
Or very close to it so don't think it's something others won't understand or sympathise with. Keep it together, things will work out.
Kristina
been there done that
I was in the same place nine years ago and the best choice I had was to declare bankruptcy. Once you do this then the credit card companies are stopped from going after you and the court case is stoppped. Since you are in the US this now can only be done once in your lifetime since this after the new legislation but it is better than otherthings that could happen. Your credit history will be repaired after about ten years.
jenna from fl
Hugs,
Jenna From FL
Moderator/Editor
TopShelf BigCloset
It is a long road ahead but I will finally become who I should be.
Don't Panic!
You *can* work it out. You need to stay calm. If no one you know can help you, there are agencies who will -- such as Consumer Credit Counseling. Remember: if a credit-counseling agency asks you for money, it's a scam.
But the main thing is, a lot of us have been there and survived. You will too.
Kaleigh
Credit Counseling
Talk to someone you trust. Ask them to refer you to a credit counselor. There are many scams out there so make sure you are talking to someone without a vested interest.
You will quickly find that your worst nightmares are just that - mightmares - not based in rality. Simple economics prevents sucking blood from a frozen turnip. I've been on the other side many, many times -- and believe me, the will to spend good money chasing bad just isn't that strong.
These things usually get to the point where you're at through a lack of action on your part. Make resolving this issue the number one priority in your life for a few days. It will be resolved and the worst things that can happen to you are far less Draconian than what you're imagining.
It might help if you have a little compassion for the people on the other end of the transaction. I don't like the current credit card laws any better than most people do. They allow usury, which is a sin. Funny how we allow that sin but come down so hard on others. BUT -- there are many, many people who don't think they owe money until someone forces them to pay it. I've gotten court orders and still not collected money that was unquestionably owed to me. People are living like kings by simply duping the credit industry. If you saw everything they do on a daily basis you would understand why they act so impersonally. They've been told every lie possible.
I'm not saying you're a liar and have no idea what caused your inability to pay, I'm simply trying to soothe your mind by adding some perspective.
Our do nothing congress is currently working on credit card reform. Of course, they will do nothing, which is what a government bought and paid for by corporate America does best.
Angela Rasch (Jill M I)
Angela Rasch (Jill M I)
Bet they're not
Don't panic is the best advice there is, and find a good credit counselor too!! But be very, very careful. Some who call themselves that actually are getting paid commissions on what they get you to pay.
I don't know how big this debt is, but it is a pretty good bet that they are not actually going to use the courts. Think about it, sending a lawyer downtown for several days, court cost that must be paid up front, hiring someone to serve the papers, it is expensive. They are saying all this as a scare tactic and no more. They aren't going to spend cash to squeeze a turnip. (At least large banks aren't, individuals sometimes want revenge more than money.)
If it is more than a year or two old the paper has been sold to a collection agency for pennies on the dollar, the quicker they can get a few extra pennies, and stop spending money on mail and phone calls, the happier they are.
But remember, the debt is NOT whatever they say it is either. All those escalating interest rates, late fees and penalties won't fly as far as an anvil in a court if they took it that far.
The debt is the amount you borrowed, and if they won't (or can't) tell you the original amount, they are sleaze and ignore them, and find the original lender and deal with them. You should try to pay that original amount asap (but it need not be yesterday) -- not doing that is called theft (the ethical term - not the legal one), and they have earned a little more (there is a time value to money). But the ethical term for the penalties tacked on is F---ing horse S---. Don't fall for it.
Ask around community groups and churches (not just look at the bulletin boards), there are good pros to help and do it for free too.
Good luck,
Jan
Don't Panic (Really)
Credit card debt is also known as "unsecured debt." It's unsecured because there are no assets pledged on its behalf. It's not like a mortgage or a car loan, where if you default they can repossess the asset.
There are no debtor's prisons. You're not going to go to jail. If you're as poor as you say, you have no assets to even be executed against (taken) even if the credit card company gets a judgement. You might want to talk to a Legal Aid office (if there's one near you available that will talk about a civil matter) to get some advice. Alternatively, you might want to appear at the court date, tell the judge that you're indigent (that's the legal term for poor) and request legal assistance or a postponement. You can stall the case for several months, which at least delays when the company can get a judgement.
Also, depending on what state you're in, there are laws that prevent creditors from taking certain things away from you. Like food, clothing, household furnishings, your last X dollars, cars worth less than Y or your rent money. They're also not allowed to garnish wages to a degree that would leave you homeless or starving or unable to get to work.
So, in all likelihood, all is not grim. Don't panic. Do a little research and figure out what your rights are, how the system works, and what the smartest course of action might be. As part of your research, if you're not working a regular work-week you might want to go see how things work at the courthouse where your case is going to be called. Almost all hearings are open to the public. You can just go sit and watch. The court clerk's office can give you info on what type of case is heard in which room.
Still crying a lot, but...
Hey everyone. Thank you for all the support. This site is almost always my 'safe place' and it is great people that make it so.
I don't have any assets. I'm not as bad in debt as some people, and I DO have a forty hour a week job- one that keeps me too stressed to even consider a second one. My debt is a total of between eight and ten thousand dollars, not sure exactly. The credit card? About 1500 of that, the rest is student loans.
It looks like I'm going to have to move back home.
Sorry I broke down.
That's what friends and family are for
Use the help your Mom offers to cut your expenses to the bone and get the help you need to resolve your credit problems. Sometimes we all need a little help. You will likely repay your Mom back and then some in other ways over the years as she ages and needs assistance herself. Plus she gets the pleasure of her child’s company so she benefits from this too.
I agree, get good, reliable advice on credit counseling as there are many scams. With luck you can arrange a fair schedule to pay off the debit. A reputable bank or card company will negotiate down what they claim you owe to something approaching fair and reasonable. And if they won’t, bankruptcy is a legal and ethical way to resolve things when negotiation fails. With luck, this step will not be needed.
It is so easy with the confusing credit card rules and regulations and the 18,, 20, 23 percent interest charges – authorized by Congress back when inflation was nearing 14 percent over a quarter of a century ago. Never mind it has only recently gotten any where near as high as 5 percent since it dropped to single digits in the early 1980s. But then this is the same Congress never rescinded the special on the Federal phone tax that was put on to pay off the Spanish American War. I think it’s still being collected.
Calm down, get help and you’ll get a handle on your life again.
John in Wauwatosa
John in Wauwatosa
Bankrptcy -
First, let's be real clear. I'm NOT an attorney. I do use and read laws, codes and ordinances as a regular part of my work, so I can usually find what I'm looking for in them. After scanning the comments thru John's, I took a quick look at the federal bankruptcy law. Now, I didn't read the whole thing, it's really a bit long, but I counldn't find anything that said you were limited to filing personal bankruptcy once in your lifetime. A usually reliable source in the accounting field agreed that this sounded like one of the scare myths that credit collection firms like to spread.
Working with only what I've read on the blog, I think you should at least investigate filing. A good, legitimate Credit Counseling Agency would be a good place to start. Another would be the office of a tax attorney (check your phone book). That office would also be a good place to get a lead to a legit CCA. The suggestion to seek out a Legal Advisory Office is also a good bit advice. Also, the rules differ from state to state, so general advice is only good in the state it reference. The basic set-up is federal, but the process is under State law.
The best advice of all is "Don't Panic".
Old Fox
They can't get blood from a stone
I've been there, done that, and some of my disability is being taken for a state backed student loan, and when that is paid off, federal taxes need to be dealt with.
But the credit card companies can't touch my income because it is federal disability income.
If you are as indigent as you say, see your state or local Social Services agencies about getting government assistance. The worst you will be doing is waste a little time.
with concern;
shalimar
there is still hope
Sorry to hear you are in the dumps. But, there is hope, if you know what I know. Write me at [email protected] and we can begin a dialogue which can put you on a path to becoming self sufficient. Cynthia