Your Favourite Wanker?

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A tip of the hat to Ceri for the blog about writer/editor relationships. That and some of the comments made me start to think about those self-important "head firmly embedded in their anus" individuals who inflict their presence on us through the media and make us go apoplectic at the sight or sound of them or the words they write. You know, the people you wouldn't piss on if they were on fire (unless you pissed gasoline of course) or would actually cross the road to punch them in the nose.
Leaving out politicians, because it's all too easy for them to stir antipathy and rage in your breast, here are some of my "favourite" wankers, not necessarily in order:-

Clive James-for his absolute narcissism over the way he puts words together

Dave Letterman-the embodiment of every smart-arse New Yorker

Pamela Anderson-recently accepted a gig in a failing TV show sponsored by KFC and then proceeded to lambaste them for killing chickens. Doh!

Jeremy Clarkson-words fail me. I wish they'd fail him

Paris Hilton-famous for being famous. For what? Courting publicity?

Please note that I use the term "wanker" in its broadest sense in order to include the ladies.
I'd love to see the pet hates of others out there, and when I think of more I'll post them,
Hugs,
Joanne

Comments

Please

erin's picture

Let's not make this political. And I'm going to include political commentators and newscasters who do opinion in that ban. Thanks.

- Erin

= Give everyone the benefit of the doubt because certainty is a fragile thing that can be shattered by one overlooked fact.

= Give everyone the benefit of the doubt because certainty is a fragile thing that can be shattered by one overlooked fact.

David Letterman

He was born in Indiana and is the embodiment of mid-western good wit. He is almost as good a host as Johnny Carson, who remains the gold standard. A smartass New Yorker uses a hatchet to butter his bread. Letterman sneaks up behind and pours goofiness all over you through the gap in his teeth.

Angela Rasch (Jill M I)

Angela Rasch (Jill M I)

Ah, Taste

joannebarbarella's picture

There's no accounting for it, is there Angela? I thought nearly all New Yorkers were born in Indiana,like Clark Kent. What you see as goofy charm I see as intolerable supercilious smugness, so somehow I think we'll have to differ on this one,
Hugs,
Joanne

It may be an American thing :)

erin's picture

Then again, not even every American is charmed by Letterman, Chevy Chase or others of that type. Once you realize the smugness is supposed to be an act, it's easier to see through to the goofiness. Letterman's character is a parody of the small town boy makes good in the big city American dream, so it probably means more to Americans who get that.

Oh, and Clark Kent was born in either Ohio, Kansas or upstate New York, depending on which myth you're talking about. And Metropolis is in Delaware these days. :)

All the people on my own wanker list are politicians so I'm banned from talking about them by myself. :)

Hugs,
Erin

= Give everyone the benefit of the doubt because certainty is a fragile thing that can be shattered by one overlooked fact.

= Give everyone the benefit of the doubt because certainty is a fragile thing that can be shattered by one overlooked fact.

Actually, Clark Kent was

KristineRead's picture

Actually, Clark Kent was born on Krypton, I believe, but grew up in Ohio, Kansas or upstate New York. But I'm just being picky..

Hugs,

Kristy

Not exactly

erin's picture

Not in the current myth. He was born in Kansas when the rocket landed. He traveled to Earth as an in vitro fetus in present continuity. :) Back before the eighties, though, you would be right -- sort of. :)

On the other hand, Superman was created in Cleveland, Ohio by two teenagers Jerry Siegel and Joe Shuster. Joe was Canadian-born, BTW.

And in the fifties and sixties, Clark had a New York state birth certificate issued by the orphanage where Ma and Pa Kent took him. From the map they once showed, Smallville was somewhere between Buffalo and Syracuse. SUPERMAN was born on Krypton but Clark could prove he wasn't. :)

Hugs,
Erin

= Give everyone the benefit of the doubt because certainty is a fragile thing that can be shattered by one overlooked fact.

= Give everyone the benefit of the doubt because certainty is a fragile thing that can be shattered by one overlooked fact.

I stand (or actualy sit ;) )

KristineRead's picture

I stand (or actualy sit ;) ) corrected.

I was not much on the comics myself, watched the old TV show with George Reeves (in syndication, I'm NOT that old...) have seen most of the movies with Christopher Reeves, and loved the Lois and Clark version.

Have not followed smallville, or any of the animated versions. Well I guess I did watch some justice league when I was a kid, not the new ones.

So I defer to your superior knowledge.

Hugs,

Kristy

Unfortunately ...

erin's picture

I AM that old. :)

My favorite comics were Uncle Scrooge, Little Lulu, Donald Duck, Wonder Woman and Superman, in approximately that order. :) Then The Flash came out and I had a problem, more comics that I liked than I could buy. I gave up Casper and Rex the Wonder Dog for The Flash but those meanies brought out Challengers of the Unknown. (Actually, I think that one had been out already but I just discovered it.) I gave up Archie for the Challengers but I kept buying Betty and Veronica, it only came out half as often. All was well ... then Green Lantern came out and I was doomed to a life of chores after school to get the money to feed my habit. It was either that or give up Hot Stuff. :)

Hugs,
Erin

= Give everyone the benefit of the doubt because certainty is a fragile thing that can be shattered by one overlooked fact.

= Give everyone the benefit of the doubt because certainty is a fragile thing that can be shattered by one overlooked fact.

maestro, if you will?

laika's picture

Donald Trump trumpetting his own godlike glory
Quentin Tarantino, sophmoric and gory
The late Anna Nicole, and network news anchors
these are a few of my favourite wankers

Every last host on American Idol
Springer and Maury make me reach for my Midol
Adam Sandler's witless and unfunny anger
These are a few of my favourite wankers

Crazed Tom Cruise swelling Scientology's coffers
The once great Woody Allen now makes me quite nauseous
That damn Britney Spears my God someone should spank her
These are a few of my favorite wankers

~~thankewvurrymuch, Laika

.
[OKAY I LIKED PULP FICTION AND JACKIE BROWN. WHEN I REFER TO TARANTINO AS A WANKER
I MEANT MOSTLY WHEN HE GETS IN FRONT OF THE CAMERA & BECOMES A CINEMATIC PUNDIT.
THAT SNEERY THING HE DOES. I WAS WORKING QUICK HERE W/ THIS SONG PARODY...]

.
"Government will only recognize 2 genders, male + female,
as assigned at birth-" (In his own words:)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C1lugbpMKDU

A Few More

joannebarbarella's picture

There's Boy George. Somebody should chain him up. Hmmm, on second thoughts maybe not, but he's so eighties.

Germaine Greer spitting the dummy because a (female) playwright had the temerity to take the piss out of her.

Naomi Campbell proving that supermodels can be SOO dumb.

Prince Charles. Nuff said.:-)

Joanne

British Royalty

Prince Charles- Only man alive who dumped a beautiful woman to marry a polo pony.

Einstein described insanity as doing the same thing over and over again and expecting the result to change. Was Albert a reader of TG fiction then?

Daniel, author of maid, whore, bimbo, and sissy free TG fiction since 2000

What the world needs is more geniuses with humility; there are so few of us left.- Oscar Levant

That's rather unfair.

As a republican (it means different things here in the UK :) ) I hold no great regard for the monarchy but I have nothing against the individuals themselves. If only they would shut up and go away :)

Charles was in love with Camilla long before he was persuaded to marry the star struck teenager, Diana, as Camilla was considered 'unsuitable'. Moreover, to compare a 50 odd year old woman with one very much younger is also a bit much. I suppose Diana was considered beautiful (she never did much for me - too insipid) but appearance isn't everything (or even that important) which is just as well or most of us would spend our lives alone. I bet Camilla's a lot more fun - Diana always seemed to be the sort of women who'd get upset if she broke a fingernail.

Geoff

Hey!

It is sooo damn hard for me to cultivate long nails (which I love) they crack, peel, pop off at the slightest impact... its heartbreaking when such effort goes to naught... specially when you can't even remember what you hit... or if you even did.

So I can emphasise with the poor 'insipid' girl. I should be so insipid.

Grin,
Dayna.

Camilla

She's easy to make fun of, but she has a head on her shoulders and some character. I read some time ago from Michael Yon, the war correspondent, that she unstintingly supported the men of the 4 Rifles (UK) in Iraq. She wrote individual letters to all the families of the dead and wounded and sent whiskey to injured men at her own expense. That's class.

As far as Prince Charles is concerned, well, for some reason he reminds me of Al Gore.

Aardvark

"Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony."

Mahatma Gandhi

"Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony."

Mahatma Gandhi

I'm With You

joannebarbarella's picture

Geoff,
I was just about to leap in with some trepidation, since I have been keel-hauled before for being less than suitably reverent to Saint Diana, but you beat me to it. If she were still alive she would have been a prime candidate for my list, but one is not allowed to speak ill of the dead (unless it's Stalin or Hitler) so I shall keep my mouth shut on that subject.
Poor Camilla gets subjected to all sorts of abuse based solely on the fact that she looks a little horsey. How unfair. Anybody on BC who subscribes to that view should be thoroughly ashamed of themselves. Think of our situation.
I think this lady has shown remarkable fortitude and courage throughout her life and she has done it IN SILENCE. Imagine the nerve it must take to walk out in public knowing that everybody is going to be comparing you unfavourably with HER. I think she's wonderful and I bet she's good in bed too. So There!
Joanne