Birthday, what birthday?

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According to the calendar, I turned 51 today.

To be honest, though, my birthdays haven't been something to celebrate for a long, long time.

I lost a fair number of people I considered friends when I started on hormones and living as a female back in 1992.

I lost even more when I went through a completely stupid and unnecessary legal hassle from 1998 to 2000.

I've met lots of people over the years that I've been online, but I would consider almost all of them to be acquaintances, not friends. There aren't many people who know that I'm a pre-op transsexual, except for a couple of sites that I am at best occasionally active on at the moment.

The big exception, I would say, is here. There are many people here who are trans in one way or another, or are understanding. That makes this the one place where I might actually feel that I have people that I could call friends, although I haven't used the add friend function yet.

I suppose in many ways, I'm a loner, even when I'm interacting with others. That isn't helped by the fact that my Fibroymalgia and the migraines I deal with on a daily basis; the pain from either of those can make it even harder for me to make an effort to socialize. It also isn't helped by the fact that I've put on about 100 pounds over the last 10 years, I'm 5'5" and weigh in at about 270 pounds currently.

I'm going to be moving at some point during the summer, likely in July, and after that I plan to buy a cheap bicycle and start riding again. I used to love to roam around the city here (Toronto), there's lots of nice paths available, and it would help me to get back into decent shape.

Anyway, I want to say thank you to Erin, Piper and all the rest who have kept this site going, this place is where I spend a lot of time relaxing.

I also want to thank all the people who have commented on my stories or have sent me PMs with ideas or concerns.

I haven't been writing for a while now because the migraines have been bad enough that I wasn't able to concentrate on things. The migraines seem to be easing off a bit at this point, so I might get back to the writing some time soon (I have four pieces on the go. lol).

Comments

You are welcome here!

Bobbie Sue's picture

As one of the people who has been reading your stories, I am glad that you found a "home" here. I have enjoyed your work and would like to see it continue, health permitting. I don't know if I speak for anyone other than myself, but this site seems to be my second home, too.

Happy birthday and many more!

HUGS

Re: You are welcome here!

Thanks, Bobbie Sue. I'll keep kicking for as long as possible, and I hope to get back to the writing soon.

Happy Birthday!

Haylee V's picture

If I had known, I would have baked you a gluten-free, fat-free, sugar-free, dairy-free, egg-free cake. I must admit, it tastes like $h1t and looks like cardboard, but it's all the doctors allow me now...

You have been an inspiration to me, and I'm so glad we met. I can never truly thank you enough.

*Kisses*
Haylee V

*Kisses Always*
Haylee V

don't

Maddy Bell's picture

Buy a cheap bike - it'll put you off the activity forever! Get something next level that won't fall to bits in a couple of weeks - bikes are designed to carry a max rider weight of @ 200lbs, the wheels in particular take quite a bashing from heavier riders and cheap bikes use very poor quality wheels.
Grab life and run with it!


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Madeline Anafrid Bell

Re: don't

Actually, I know places where I can get a decent mountain bike, which I tend to prefer for their sturdiness, for under $50 second hand. All that I would need to do then would be to get locks and panniers in case I need to carry something on it.

I have a small bicycle repair kit in amongst my belongings here, I've used it a few times in the past when a bike had problems.

birthday

mountaindrake's picture

hope you start having good and happy one as for the bike buy the best quality you can afford cheap bike is like cheap boots a pain in the @@@ I am sure you know that reference. As for the loss of friend if something that minor set them on edge they were not friends. please have many happy returns of the day have a good day and enjoy life.

Have a good day and enjoy life.

Re: birthday

Mountaindrake, when a male suddenly decides to jump ship to the women's side of things, many men out there see it as a rather nasty insult to their manhood that someone they know wants to be female and possibly remove their genitalia. They don't consider it to be minor.

Almost all of the "friends" I had at that time were males, with a few females scattered among them.

After that, I ended up with maybe a half dozen or so semi-close male friends, that lasted for several years.

They moved on to other things while I was sitting in a jail cell between 1998 and 2000, two of those friends passed away. I haven't had more than a few close friends at any time since 2000, and at this point, I have only one actual friend here in Toronto that I trust.

That jail time was due to my being charged with two counts of second degree murder. The truth is that I didn't commit the crime, several different people pointed out the ones that likely did do it, but the police flat out ignored anything that wasn't about putting me down.

I was eventually released because of two things, no actual evidence that would be able to pass the "proof beyond a reasonable doubt" test was the first, the second was the police directly violated my rights throughout the entire questioning in the headquarters building.

I have to agree that the people who jumped ship on me both times were not true friends, true friends stay by you through thick and thin.

As for the bike, see my reply to Maddy's comment, I've bought a few bikes that way and they were fine, although I was a lot lighter. LOL

Belated Birthday

I'm sorry that I missed this posting, but late is better than being ignored. Am totally sorry to hear some your past and losing friends. If you come to Santa Cruz, you will find it very friendly. I guess you don't have to live in the Deep South to encounter 'red neckism'. Please feel the love your fans have for you and may you be blessed with many good years to come.

Hugs and kisses,

Santacruzman