No, I'm not going into labor. One of the great things about a site like this is the opportunity for writers to share knowledge and help each other improve. That's my intention with this blog about contractions.
In a grammatical sense, a contraction is a shortened word or phrase, with the omitted letters or words replaced by an apostrophe; words like can't, wouldn't, I'll and I'd, which replace can not, would not, I will and I would. We all knew that ... right?
Well, honestly, I've seen some works that make me wonder. So, in way of demonstrating my point, I'm going to use an excerpt from something I'm working on right now:
"I had hoped this foolishness was behind us," Mrs. Reagan said a moment later after she examined the note.
"Me too," Kay said. "How did they get the combination for my locker?"
"I can not be certain," Mrs. Reagan said. "It is possible someone hacked into the school computer and got it from the database. Obviously our precaution of assigning you a locker combination at the last minute was not successful."
Kay nodded. The locks on all the lockers were provided by the school, and the combinations were recorded in the computer so the staff could get into a locker if necessary.
"All right, we will go to Plan B," Mrs. Reagan said. "I am giving you permission to use a lock of your own. No one, not even I, will have the combination."
"I, um, I brought one, just in case," Kay told her.
Mrs. Reagan smiled, but there was a hint of sorrow in her eyes.
"Stop by on your way to first period and change out the locks," she told Kay, taking a pad from her desk and scribbling out a pass. "I would also appreciate it if you could show Brian around for me today; he has the same class schedule as you."
"He is taking IS classes?" Kay asked, surprise in her voice.
The International Scholar, or IS, was one of three magnet programs at Northside. IS focused on a college preparatory curriculum, and students took advanced courses starting in their freshman year. It was very unusual for someone to transfer in, especially in their senior year. Of the almost five hundred students in the senior class, only forty-eight were enrolled in the demanding program.
"He was enrolled in a similar program at his previous school, and his grades were almost as outstanding as yours," Mrs. Reagan said as she finished writing out the pass. She handed it to Kay and added, "He could really use a friend here at Northside."
Kay took the pass and rose, her eyes sad as she said, "I am sure he could, but we both know he does not want a friend like me."
Okay, at first blush there's nothing grammatically wrong with this. (If there is, ignore it - work with me people.) But when you think about how people talk, it's very stilted. The story is in a contemporary setting, and the protagonist, Kay, is a teenager. As a rule, teenagers don't say 'do not', 'will not' and the like. They use CONTRACTIONS. Even the adult, Mrs. Reagan, would more than likely use contractions. So, here is how I really wrote this section:
"I had hoped this foolishness was behind us," Mrs. Reagan said a moment later after she examined the note.
"Me too," Kay said. "How'd they get the combination for my locker?"
"I can't be certain," Mrs. Reagan said. "It's possible someone hacked into the school computer and got it from the database. Obviously our precaution of assigning you a locker combination at the last minute wasn't successful."
Kay nodded. The locks on all the lockers were provided by the school, and the combinations were recorded in the computer so the staff could get into a locker if necessary.
"All right, we'll go to Plan B," Mrs. Reagan said. "I'm giving you permission to use a lock of your own. No one, not even I, will have the combination."
"I, um, I brought one, just in case," Kay told her.
Mrs. Reagan smiled, but there was a hint of sorrow in her eyes.
"Stop by on your way to first period and change out the locks," she told Kay, taking a pad from her desk and scribbling out a pass. "I'd appreciate it if you could show Brian around for me today; he has the same class schedule as you."
"He's taking IS classes?" Kay asked, surprise in her voice.
The International Scholar, or IS, was one of three magnet programs at Northside. IS focused on a college preparatory curriculum, and students took advanced courses starting in their freshman year. It was very unusual for someone to transfer in, especially in their senior year. Of the almost five hundred students in the senior class, only forty-eight were enrolled in the demanding program.
"He was enrolled in a similar program at his previous school, and his grades were almost as outstanding as yours," Mrs. Reagan said as she finished writing out the pass. She handed it to Kay and added, "He could really use a friend here at Northside."
Kay took the pass and rose, her eyes sad as she said, "I'm sure he could, but we both know he doesn't want a friend like me."
Doesn't this version sound more natural? The only place I didn't use a contraction where I could have was the very first sentence, and that was intentional for emphasis. By not using a contraction there, it's basically the same thing as adding formatting for emphasis, i.e. "I had hoped this foolishness was behind us."
I know what you're saying ... "Now wait a minute, what if my story isn't in a contemporary setting? What if it's set in a period when people spoke more formally?" Well, if that's the case, then of course what I've said above doesn't apply. The vast majority of stories posted here and at other sites like this, however, are contemporary.
Ah .. wait, I heard that one too. "What if I want a character to be more formal, even in a contemporary story?" Again, this is a different animal. I myself have used this to give certain characters an air of sophistication, but it only works if they are different from the other characters. With such a character too, I sometimes still like to slip in a contraction, maybe in a moment of stress ... "I don't know why she did it!"
Contractions aren't just for dialog either. It's perfectly acceptable to include them in the narrative, for example like this:
Kay smiled, but she wasn't at all sure that was true. While Jan was just an alternate, she'd constantly sucked up to Robyn, the squad's captain. Now that she was on the squad, she might not feel the need to do that anymore.
~ This is gonna be a long year, ~ Kay thought as she opened her locker.
It's all about readability. Think about how people around you everyday talk. Think about the dialog in the movies and television shows you watch. Even news anchors use contractions. The more readable you make a story, the more you make it sound the way the voices in your reader's heads talk, the more likely they'll be to read and enjoy it. Readability can't make a bad story great, but lack of it can make a great story bad, or at the very least ... unreadable.
Now, about the last line in the example above, that word 'gonna'. That's what we call a colloquialism ...ah, but I guess maybe we should cover that another time.
I hope I don't come off sounding like a know-it-all here, because that really isn't my intention. I just wanted to pass along my two-cents, and maybe help some of my fellow writers out there. Anyway, I hope that someone out there might find this useful. Happy writing!
Comments
Can't but agree.
I think you should write in a natural a style as possible. Grammar is to ensure clarity and precision. As long as the contraction is clear I cannot see any objection to it whilst I can see many advantages.
Firstly that many are hallowed by time and use to the extent that they become recognised in their own right. I don't even buy the argument that people used to talk more formally. They didn't. They may have used different contractions, including some that we are now more formal about, but they didn't avoid contractions. Strewth!
Secondly dialogue without colloquialisms and contractions doesn't work. Sounds wrong. Is wrong. I was taken to task recently about the grammar used by some characters. But that is how people speak. The degree of mistakes indicates many things about a person. His/her educational and social background for a start. Errors in dialogue, as with the elision of words, are essential.
So thumbs up for 'gonna'.
One of my habits, bad indubitably, is the breaking off of sentences. Not finishing them. Marking hesitations with '....' I do it a lot. Far too much I suspect. And it is doubtless wrong and may well infuriate those purer in heart than myself. But that is how it works in real life. People do not finish sentences. They hop from one thought to another either because they lose the thread, or think of another way of expressing themselves, or because they rely on the listener to fill in the blanks themselves or .... well I am sure you can provide other reasons for yourself.
So I am all for being cavalier in one's approach to writing. Words, phrases, sentences should be your tool not your master.
Hugs,
I agree, Scott
My thoughts are that some people don't like contractions, whilst others use them almost exclusively.
I think is writing is to be believed, then everything from dialogue to the narrative has to be right for the time in which it's set, the type of people being portrayed and the situations.
Nowadays, I think there are more contractions and colloquialisms used than there ever have been and no longer do we write or speak like they did in say, Dickens' time, certainly not Shakespearian. Some people, like policemen in England, have a vocabulary all of their own and in order to make things realistic, this has to be reflected in the prose - I think.
Take Fleurie's Old Alhambra for instance. The way it has been worded conjures up an air about it - an atmosphere and Angharad's EAFOAB has that light, easy bantering way. Both are as different as chalk and cheese, whilst both set the scene and create the ambience that is right for the prose.
I have singled them out, but there are many authors here who write that way, choosing the vernacular that fits with the characters, the situations and their surroundings.
Lady E
Read it aloud.
Good thoughts, Scott. Since the written word is an analogue of the spoken word, one way to gauge whether you're successfully communicating your intent is to read it aloud -- to a friendly listener, if possible, otherwise to an empty chair across the room (while imagining you're reading to friends around a campfire, perhaps). If you've got a tape-recorder, read the passage or story to tape, and then listen to the playback, perhaps several times over as many days.
Did you get the voicing right? Does the character's diction carry the characterization you intended? If not, or if you're not sure, save off a copy of what you've got now so you can't lose anything, then go in and change it.
Narration and description are tricky too, because of the inexact gradations between impersonal third-person description and purely-personal first-person interior monologue from one character's viewpoint. The closer it gets shaded to the personal, the more it will sound most natural when it assumes that character's diction, and vice versa: the more informal and colloquial (and opinionated) the descriptive passages are, the more they will be assumed to be voiced by one particular character rather than the impersonal author. This, also, gets noticed in read-aloud.
I'll be waiting to see how you handle the mishandling of the lowly apostrophe (or, perhaps bowing to the Net-inevitable, should that be written as apostrophe's? :)
Contraction contradictions
Very early in my writing, I was taken to task by one reader for the use of contractions by the females in my story. I was told that women didn't use contractions, and so my female characters, to be more believable shouldn't either. The female protagonist of F.M. Busby's "Rissa Kerguelen" series drives me crazy, as Busby wrote her speech using no contractions. This was a speech pattern originally assumed as part of a persona she used while escaping the future corporate Earth government, then apparently in by the character herself. It was frustrating to read for me, and didn't sound natural.
What I personally see is the use of contractions changes with the type of dialog. Casual conversation uses more, formal presentations seem to use less, perhaps to emphasis a point. Frustration by the character may cause them to drop them entirely. "I am not a girl! I did not choose to wear these clothes!" But in casual conversations with my friends and acquaintances, both sexes seem to use contractions about equally.
Now, just explain the use of "its" vs. "it's" in a manner I can remember!
KJT
"Life is not measured by the breaths you take, but by the moments that take your breath away.”
George Carlin
its or it's
Its refers to something as in "Its hair" - the hair belonging to it - whatever it may be.
"It's" is a contraction and a short form of "It is"
Hope this clears it up.
Lady E
But I'm blonde
I can never remember the rule when I need it. I suppose I could write it in a sticky note and stick it on my computer display; but I have a hard enough time seeing the screen for all the little white spots of correction fluid.
So, it would be:
"It's hair."
"No it ain't, it's over thar. Its the brown one."
Right?
KJT
"Life is not measured by the breaths you take, but by the moments that take your breath away.”
George Carlin
You only ever (and always) use "it's"...
...as a contraction (for "it is" or "it has"). Otherwise it's always "its."
So, it would be:
"It's hair."
"No it ain't, it's over thar. It's the brown one. See? That one over yonder, all by its lonesome."
The Easy Way
I always remember it like this- possessives (its, theirs, his, hers) have no apostrophe, but contractions (it's, there's, that's, he's) do.
Melanie E.
Here's how I do it, Karen
I use the 'opposite' approach for all pronouns. The 's denotes possessive case for nouns and is seen as 'normal' by most of us: Scott's car, Karen's purse, the dog's leash, etc.....
Pronouns do it the opposite way, without an apostrophe: the car was his, the purse is hers, the dog strained at its leash. Remembering this helps me keep the whole 'it's its' thing straight. When I look at 'it's its', I consider whether the phrase is indicating possession. Possession = no apostrophe.
In your examples it should be:
"Its hair." (Possessive - the hair belongs to it, so no apostrophe. Of course this short phrase is out of context, so it could also be a contraction of "It is hair", in which case it would be as you wrote.)
"No it ain't, it's over thar. It's the brown one." (Both of these are contractions of it is. There's no indication of possession.)
Anyway, I just remember if 'it' owns something, 'its' doesn't get an apostrophe, which is just the opposite of the case if Scott owned 'it', cause then the apostrophe would be Scott's....
Scott
-- Moliere
Bree
The difference between fiction and reality? Fiction has to make sense.
-- Tom Clancy
http://genomorph.tglibrary.com/ (Currently broken)
http://bree-ramsey314.livejournal.com/
Twitter: @genomorph
C'mon, y'all
don't you know "hair" is the opposite of "thar?"
"It's hair. Raht hair, not way over thar."
:)
At last!
Somebody got it! :-)
KJT
"Life is not measured by the breaths you take, but by the moments that take your breath away.”
George Carlin
Ooops
I stand corrected. The last one should still be it's though. :P
Scott
-- Moliere
Bree
The difference between fiction and reality? Fiction has to make sense.
-- Tom Clancy
http://genomorph.tglibrary.com/ (Currently broken)
http://bree-ramsey314.livejournal.com/
Twitter: @genomorph
The challenge
That's the challenge of writing good dialog. If you write it as people speak it breaks many rules of grammar. Colloquialisms and contractions are just part of it. Many dialects just within the borders of the US break many grammar rules and so putting that 'voice' on the page is as I say a challenge. The Carolina southern dialect that I'm most familiar mangles plural verb forms. Just ask anyone who have edited for me!
I'm still learning but it seems to be balance of using enough non-standard forms to give the flavor, but as much as possible within the accepted grammar forms to make it readable.
Hope I'm not jumping the gun Scott. Great Blog!
grover
It's A Matter of Timing
Contractions should be avoided in the narrative other than the most common contractions such as can't and don't.
But most importantly. Contractions should be timed and noted so that the midwife can be properly informed as soon as she arrives.
Angela Rasch (Jill M I)
Angela Rasch (Jill M I)
Much like Comedy
For me, the longer time that a character has to respond, the less likely they are to use a contraction. As a quick example, I would say:
For me, I see my narrator's as character who fall into the last category. They have all types of time to worry about the correctness of their words.
On another matter of timing, specifically historical timing, I think it is a mistake to assume that the majority of the conversation will be formal. Even in the past, I would believe it to be a very affected manner of speech, too time consuming except for the most indolent or ritualized.
The narrator
By and large fiction falls into two categories where the narrative voice is concerned. One is first person, where the narrator is an actual character in the story. In this case, the narrative voice should mimic the character's voice in most cases, in my opinion. I see the narrator here like a blogger, and when I blog I tend to write as I speak.
The other principle narrator is third person omniscient. In this instance, I believe the narrative voice should follow the 'flavor' of the story. A contemporary tale should have a contemporary voice, while a period tale should have a period voice.
I don't believe time influences speech that much. I mean if I am relating something that happened to me to some friends, even after many years of reminiscing, I'll tell the tale in a voice that I use in everyday conversation. I think preparation is a more appropriate discriminator; if I know I have to make a presentation on a topic, I'll prepare my words in advance and they'll be more formal
Scott
-- Moliere
Bree
The difference between fiction and reality? Fiction has to make sense.
-- Tom Clancy
http://genomorph.tglibrary.com/ (Currently broken)
http://bree-ramsey314.livejournal.com/
Twitter: @genomorph
Speed of Response
For me, I see first person narrator, not as a blogger, but as a salesperson selling me their story. Because of that they are likely to have polished their words, rounding off rough edges.
Probably time is not a good definition of what I was getting at, speed of response may be slightly better. The longer a person takes to prepare a response, the less likely to use a contraction. Drop a hammer on my foot and I am even able to contract fuckin'hell.
Okay, lemme try another approach on first person
First we have this, where our first person narrator has had a lot of time to polish his narrative:
Or maybe this rougher version:
Polished or rough, which conveys the character of Nick better?
Scott
-- Moliere
Bree
The difference between fiction and reality? Fiction has to make sense.
-- Tom Clancy
http://genomorph.tglibrary.com/ (Currently broken)
http://bree-ramsey314.livejournal.com/
Twitter: @genomorph
Neither to be Honest
Both would grow extremely tiresome to read in short order, something the first person narrator does not want to happen. One does not need to polish until all patina is gone, but neither does one need to continuously show each and every wart.
Dropped hammer
That's happened to me once or twice.
I find that contractions are not always adequate in these situations.
What I find helpful is another art, which is to concatenate - or join stuff together.
We'll take your hammer as an example:
OhfuckohshitbollocksouchooohmyGodohshitohfuck.
Works best.
Of course, more can be added or left off depending upon the severity. I have several hammers of different sizes and one would only get an "oops" where the four pound lump hammer gets the works, but you can see where I'm going with this can't you?
Lady E (though you can drop the Lady part when I drop a hammer)
Finally someone understands.
My mother mistook mild contractions for indigestion, thus I was born without the aid of any pain killers.
With speach, little kids don't use as complex a grammer as adults and often don't use contractions but they do leave outt a lot of adverbs, pronouns and the like and may shorten. words because they can;t say the full word.
John in Wauwatosa
John in Wauwatosa
John
Is that some form of excuse?
Confused,
Lady E
Thank you, Scott
As an editor, I have gone over this point with a number of writers.
I do have one serial, where one character NEVER uses contractions, and this was pointed out to me by the author when the character was introduced.
I have no problem with that, as many people do have peculiar idiosyncrasies in their speech, and I encourage that. Use or misuse of some words is common to many.
And there are differences I always watch out for depending not just on where the author is from, but where the character is from, both in speech and phrasing.
But misuse of contraction, whether contracting words that should not be, or not contracting words that could be, is an issue. I always try to catch the first, but may let the second instance slide by, unless the author indicates i shouldn't touch it. But the final say belongs to the author. I may chane it, but it is marked as a change, which can easily be changed back.
Thank you for pointing this out5 to Yop Shelf Authors in general.
They/we are a pretty good bunch, but there is always room for improvement. I submitted my ywo stries to several people for 'evaluation' and chnaged a number of things as a result.
Holly
One of the most difficult things to give away is kindness.
It usually comes back to you.
Holly
You learn something new every day
I'm still honing my writing skills (it should only take another 100 or so years before I get it right) and I am very grateful for all the help that I receive from this community. The lesson on contractions is particularly helpful. In my story Lisa's Dream, Miss Armitage speaks more formally but Jennifer tends to use contractions.
One thing that annoys me is what I perceive to be the incorrect use of words and grammar. If we take the example "I could not help but notice her impressive figure", I believe that the options are "I could not help noticing" or "I could not help but notice". I'm sure I could think of others if I put my mind to it.
I realise that such variations in the use of words, together with mis-spelling (and I'm not talking about differences between UK and US English), seem to be increasingly common and are, or are likely to be, adopted as accepted variations in the same way as new words and phrases are constantly added to our language.
For information it is, I believe, recognised that a vocabulary of a few hundred words is all that is needed to read and comprehend a daily newspaper.
Susie
Contractions - you learn something new everyday
Hi Susan,
What needs to be remembered above all else, I think, is to create a mood. Angharad does it in both her latest stories as do Kaleigh, Anistasia and Fleurie - to name just a few.
Their work is readable and puts the reader in the middle of the time and place. Their characterisations make believable people and above all, their story-lines are engaging.
Whether you write "Queens" English or use the vernacular, the narrative can help set the tone by how things are phrased.
With speech, the speaker is the one who dictates that. Some people use vast numbers of words when they really could be more concise, where others don't, but that's their way.
Your job as the author, is to make people believe what is written, see the scene and identify with it. Some characters WILL be verbose, where others will rely on looks and mannerisms and that's all part of the fun of writing.
Of course, there will be those out there who disagree, but I DID preface this with "I think", which makes this just my opinion.
So I'm probably not going to win any Booker prizes or have a bestseller anytime soon!
So have fun.
Lady E
You could pay a fortune
for all the good advice in this column alone. I am very grateful to you all and have learned a great deal as a result of reading the comments, not only of this but also of stories.
Thank you all again.
I have a few other stories on the go at the moment but none of them is by any means complete. I don't like to post until I've got the whole thing written; I don't think it's fair on the readers to either stop completely, pause for an indefinite time due to writer's block or to write badly in order to get to the end regardless.
There's also the opportunity to take an incomplete story into another direction if I feel so inclined.
Susie
I agree, but I'd much rather
I agree, but I'd much rather read "you are" than "your"
Dear Ottery Lexa
'You are' is contracted to 'you're', not 'your', which means of you or belonging to you and is not actually a contraction at all.
I just thought I'd let you know