The smell of the ocean filled the air. I had the window open. Nikki was listening to some country station. She was waiting for a song she requested. She wanted me to hear it. I looked out the window and see a boat on the horizon. It looked like a cruise ship, or something.

“Kiara?” I heard Nikki call for me. “It's on next.”

I look away from the window and at Nikki. I hear on the radio a man speaking.

“This next song is a request, from a local resident that helped out a young child from Brookings, Oregon from an abusive father. She almost died from a fire this afternoon and would have become homeless, if it wasn't for her help. She is safe at this moment. The songs name is Concrete Angel, by Martina McBride”

♫“She walks to school with the...”♫ I was surprised. I never knew that there was a song similar to what just happened to me. While we drove down the road, We listened to the song. I can't believe she wrote this song. It was like she was writing my life. It made me cry a lot.

I could have been an angel right now, if it wasn't for my courage. Talking about angels, I wonder if I have a guardian angel? They usually help out people that are in trouble on earth, or so I have heard. I look all around me. Nikki looked over at me and started chuckling.

“What are you doing?” she asked. She was just about to turn off of 212 onto a side road.

“I'm looking to see if I had a guardian angel.” I answer, checking the back seat.

“You can't see your guardian angel, they are invisible. And everyone has one. They are with you in good times and bad. Guardian angels serve to protect whichever person God assigns them to.”

“Do you believe in God?” I look up at Nikki.

“In a way, I do. I might not see him, but he is there.”

I look down at my feet. “I sometimes do, but sometimes don't believe God exists.” I look out the window at the buildings passing by.

“Why do you say that?”

I sigh. “First of all, I always wonder, if 'They'….” I quickly look at Nikki. “Um, you can't just say God is a man, God, could be a woman as well.” Nikki smiles, almost like she agrees. “But if God really was real, why would They have me live in an abusive home with my dad? Why would They have it, I don't eat for days? Why would...”

“I completely understand what you mean.” Nikki interrupted me. “Children that go through trauma believe God has abandoned them or God is punishing them. Some lose their faith in God and...”

“I haven’t lost faith. I believe in Heaven and Hell, I believe in Jesus,” I start to cry. “But sometimes I believe I am not wanted. I can't even...” I couldn't finish my sentence. I continued crying.

“I know you just ate almost thirty minutes ago, but would you like an ice cream before we get to the house?”

“Yes!” I perked up. I stopped crying, wiping my tears away, I saw Nikki pull into a parking lot with a small diner.

“Crescent City Diner and Ice Cream is my favorite place to go for ice cream here in this city.” Nikki mentioned.

“What about Dairy Queen?” I asked, hopping out the door of the car.

“They have one back in Brookings.” Nikki spoke to me through the car before we shut the doors.

,As we were walking to the door a lady was starting to lock up.

“I'm sorry, we have just closed.” she announced.

“Awwwww!” I whined. That wasn't fair. I really wanted an ice cream. I started to pout.

Nikki looked at me and then at the lady “Is it possible you could make an ice cream for her, just this once. She had a bad day today and I just promised her one.”

The waitress looked down at me. She can tell I was disappointed. “Okay, come on in.” She opened the door and with a smile, I skipped over to the counter. “What kind do you want. We have vanilla, chocolate or swirl?”

“Um...” It has been a long time since I had ice cream. Last time I did, was when mom was still with me. “Swirl!”

“Swirl it is.” She takes a plastic bowl and fills it up. She looks at Nikki. “Because she is still under age, please help her with the toppings.” She points to a counter of goodies.

I was so excited. “I want gummy bears and M&Ms and peanuts and chocolate fudge. \” Nikki filled my bowl. “Oh, and chocolate chips on top.” When we were done, Nikki paid for the ice cream and we left the diner. I kind of wished we could have stayed, so I could have eaten it there, but she was closing.

I ate the ice cream in the car, while Nikki drove. The first bite was like heaven. When you haven't had ice cream four almost four and a half years, it would be the best tasting treat a girl, or boy could ever have.

“We're here!” Nikki announced. I looked up from the cup, with the spoon still in my mouth, I look out the window. We were pulling into a drive way. A sign near the road read 'Crescent City Home for LGBT Youth'

I pull out the spoon from my mouth. “Why does the sign say LGBT?” I asked Nikki, while we passed it. “Why doesn't it have the Q?”

“We have it as LGBT, to shorten the abbreviation. If not, it would be LGBTQIPA, short for Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, Questioning or Queer, Intersex, Pansexual and Asexual. There's another abbreviation that could have been used which is...”

“Forget I asked,” I mumbled. I was a little confused with all the letters. Nikki chuckled as she parked the car. An older woman came out of the building and headed toward the car. When I got out of the car, she was there to greet me.

“You must be Kiara,” she barked. My name is Ms. Whiswall, I am one of the night time staff here at CC House. Your bedroom is ready for you. You have forty-five minutes until you have to be in your room for the night. You will be sharing a room with another child. I do not want any problems with any of you two. You understand me?”

I nodded.

She seemed to be a little mean. Not sure if I will like her. I watched as she headed back into the building.

I took my backpack of clothes out of the back seat and walked slowly to the house. I was as nervous as a chihuahua.

“Are you the other night time staff?” I asked Nikki.

She chuckled. “No, I am a full time staff. I live here. Ms Whiswall and Sarah, which I'll be introduce you too, are the night time staff.”

“Is Sarah mean like Ms. Whiswall?” I shivered.

“Again Nikki chuckled. “Ms. Whiswall is a very nice woman. She just acts like a mean, strict person. Once you get to know her, you will like her. She is very protective of everyone.”

When we got into the building, I saw a girl looking at me from one of the rooms. She must have been about nine or ten and very pretty. A younger woman about the same age as Nikki came out of the office. She was very cheerful.

“Hello Kiara,” She cooed. “I'm Sarah. I'm guessing Nikki mentioned me.

I nodded.

“Do you want a tour of the building?”

I nodded again.

Nikki told me she had to go to the office to fill out paper work, or something like that. I wasn't sure exactly what she was talking about. We went through the whole building in less than ten minutes. There was a living room the dining room and kitchen. The kitchen was off limits to the children. Which wasn't fair. I wanted to make my own food. There was the entertainment room, in the basement. That room they had a pool table. Some teenage boys were playing that. There was a TV with a Playstation and Nintendo game systems, I glanced at some of the games. They had exercise equipment. Two teenage girls were exercising and talking to each other. I think they are a couple, not sure. Next to the room there was a library with lots and lots of books. There was a boy on the couch reading. The bedrooms were on two levels. The second floor was the boys floor and the girls floor, was the third floor.

We went up to the third floor to my room. I was so happy to know I was on the girls floor. This didn't bother anyone at all. There was a young girl sitting in the hallway when we got up the stairs. She saw me and waved. I waved back. I wanted to introduce myself, but Sarah was ahead of me and already heading to my room. I decided to introduce myself later.

When I got to my room, no one was in it. I was surprised.

“I thought I had a roommate?” I looked around the room some more.

“You do. She will be up soon,” Sarah clarified. She usually stays downstairs and watches television until nine. That's when everyone must be in their bedrooms or at least on your assigned floor for the night.” She looked over at an empty bed. “This bed is your bed. Your dresser is right next to the bed and you have to share a closet with your room mate. There is a bathroom across the hall and one in the room as well. There is a shower in both rooms. I recommend you taking a shower tonight.” She heads towards the door to the hallway. “Well, that's the end of the tour. If you need me, I will be downstairs. I hope you enjoy your stay.” She turns around and heads down the stairs.

I walk over to the staircase and watch her. Once she was not able to be seen, I turned around to see the girl that was in the hallway was now in her room. I didn't want to disturb her tonight, so I went back to my room and started to unpack my backpack.

Inside my bag, I had my dress, which I hugged. I am so glad that dad didn't see this dress. I went to the closet to put it away.

When I opened the closet, I saw tons of dresses. The girl in this room had more dresses than I have ever seen in my life. I look at my dress and then at hers. My dress wasn't as pretty as her dresses. I started to cry, which made me fall to the ground.

Just then, a hand touched my shoulder, which made me jump in shock and look. The girl I saw downstairs when I first came into the building was standing next to me. “Are you alright?” She spoke in a sweet voice. I just kept staring at her. “My names Ashley, what's your name?”

“My…” I wiped my tears from my eyes. “My names Kiara.”

“Why were you crying?” Ashley asked. I can tell she was worried about me.

“I only have one dress,” I explained “And there are lots of dresses in this...”

“You mean my dresses?” Ashley giggled.

“Their yours?” I was shocked. “Than that means… your my…”

“We're roommates!” Cheered Ashley. “And because we are roommates, if you want, you can use some of my dresses.”

“You do know that I am transgender, don't you?” I asked looking straight at Ashley.

“That doesn’t bother me,” Ashley giggled. “So am I.”

“You're transgender too?” I gasped. “But how can someone as pretty as you..?

“You're pretty too!” Ashley smiled.

“I am?”

“C'mere” Ashley took me to the bathroom to check myself out in the mirror. She looked pretty. I guess because she had cleaner hair. I looked like I haven't had a bath in weeks. Which is true in a way. I decided at that time, that I should take a shower. That was the only thing I dreaded. Every time I took a shower or a bath, I had to see something I didn't want to see.

My penis.

I wish I didn't have it. I wish I didn't have to look at it. I wish I had what girls had. I wish I was born a girl.

When I get out of the shower, I was freezing. Ashley gave me one of her sleeping wear to use for the night. It had Snow White on it. I believe she gave it to me, because Snow White was the fairest one of all. I blow dried my hair and for the first time, I had my hair brushed, which Ashley volunteered to do for me. It had lots of snarls in it, which I kept complaining.

It was almost midnight when my hair was finally brushed and was fully dried. I looked beautiful. This made me feel special. I never knew I could look this pretty. When it was time to go to bed, I hugged Ashley good night.

I wonder what tomorrow is going to be like. I wonder if everyone will like me as mush as Ashley does.

Also, what about school?