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Gender Identity Protection (HB 3552/PA 99-0417): Provides that the written directions a person leaves regarding disposition of that person’s remains may include instructions regarding gender identity including, but not limited to, instructions with respect to appearance, chosen name, and gender pronouns, regardless of whether the person has obtained a court-ordered name change, changed the gender marker on any identification document, or undergone any transition-related medical treatment.
So if you are in Illinois, and your family doesn't approve, make a Will and be buried the way you want.
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Good to know
Too late for my Jeanne but this is a good thing.
Hugs,
Erin
= Give everyone the benefit of the doubt because certainty is a fragile thing that can be shattered by one overlooked fact.
New Law.
I don't know why, but the title of this post shocked me more than I thought it should.
Maybe it was the thought of Illinois lawmakers doing something worthwhile with their time. Or doing something at all. but I'm pretty happy right now. :)
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Trouble is
Most funerals take place before the will is found
Living will
In some states you can include these kind of instructions in a living will, which will be read before burial, as it includes end of life instructions.
Waterdog
And...
The funeral parlor will ignore anything they want to. Happened to me and Jeanne, we had domestic partner papers and a living will naming me as being in control of arrangements but the funeral parlor simply ignored that and went with the sister's wishes.
Hugs,
Erin
= Give everyone the benefit of the doubt because certainty is a fragile thing that can be shattered by one overlooked fact.
Who paid the bill?
I know it's kind of mercenary, but if I'm paying for the funeral arrangements the funeral director will damn well do what I tell him to do.
It's unfortunate that some idiot made a tough time for you even worse by ignoring both the wishes of the deceased, and the wishes of the person she chose to take care of her last act on this mortal plane.
I have always maintained that when I die I really don't care what they do with my body, but I can't honestly say that anymore. As the saying goes, funerals are for the living - but when I pass on, I want those whom I love and care for to be well treated and to remember me in the manner in which I lived and loved them.
Yeah, when I go I will have a cross of Vermont Granite and a nice patch of grass next to my comrades in arms. As my name is gender neutral and I am not changing it (well, not my first name anyway) the name they use will not be an issue; but I have already expressed my wishes that the proper pronouns and forms of address be used during the ceremony, and that I be buried in the proper uniform - the one with a skirt.
Hopefully the Navy will make sure of that.
D. Eden
Dum Vivimus, Vivamus
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Submitted by Da11asF on Tue, 2015/12/22 - 9:10pm
I know it's kind of mercenary, but if I'm paying for the funeral arrangements the funeral director will damn well do what I tell him to do. ]]
That's a very compelling argument for having pre-paid arrangements. Then no one else has any claim on any "say so".
All very well and good
How do you enforce it? With a lawsuit after the fact. If you don't have clear-cut laws that spell it out, you're not going to win or your going to be a test case and spend a lot on lawyers. Just because you have pre-paid does not mean that someone can't decide that you don't have the legal right to make the decisions.
I ended up not paying and in possession of Jeanne's ashes, and let her sister have an empty grave with a headstone with the wrong name.
Hugs,
Erin
= Give everyone the benefit of the doubt because certainty is a fragile thing that can be shattered by one overlooked fact.