I've had some odd experiences with my family relating to writing.
One of my nieces has become an art historian, and sent me some things she's written. They were flawless, and I told her so in an email. I was very specific about her strengths as a writer and the way she built and supported her argument. Some time later I was talking to her father (my brother-in-law), and he said, "Your opinion meant a lot to her because she knows you're a good writer. And when she said that, it made me wonder: Have you written anything lately?"
Another brother-in-law (I have several) asked me the same thing. And my wife and daughter have wondered why I don't write.
Of course, I bite my tongue -- none of them know that I've written a fair amount -- all of it TG-related, and all of it here at BC/TS.
It's discouraging to have written all that without being able to show it to anyone I actually, physically know. I would love to be writing in the mainstream again, things that anybody could or would read.
So, last summer I decided to write a plain-vanilla romantic comedy. It took several months to work up a situation and a plot, and I was pretty pleased with it.
My daughter kept asking how the story was coming, so one day on a long drive I gave her the broad outline. When I finished, we were sitting at a table eating lunch.
"What do you think?" I asked.
She sighed and made a face. "It's okay, I guess," she replied. "But I really wish you'd write about when you and Mom were in that cult."
Well! That took all the air out of me. First of all, it wasn't really a cult. It was cult-ish. I sort of touched on it in Tabula Rasa, and she's right: I *should* put it all down in black and white. She was very small when we were involved, so it intersects some of her earliest memories, and it would explain (to her) some elements of her own life.
Second, I wish she'd told me earlier. I'd been talking for nearly six months about what I was doing, and we'd had several conversations about it. If she wanted me to write something like that, it would have been nice to know. I don't think I would have changed my plans, but at least I wouldn't end up feeling that the rug was pulled out from under me.
However, I *can* understand that she might not have known her own feelings until she actually told me. Maybe it was a vague, not-yet-articulated sensation that didn't come together until she was listening to me natter on about two imaginary people who stuggle through a series of misunderstandings and end up in love with each other. While she was listening, the feeling was probably taking more definite form and ended up as Why is he telling me this bullshit about these people who don't even exist?
Third, telling her the story made me see some pretty serious defects with the plot and missing motivations.
Anyway... I've been blown back to square one, but with a little difference. I still wish I could write something mainstream, something fun that would make people laugh and all that shit... something I could say to anyone yes, that's mine but my daughter is right: there is one book that only I can write, and it might be the only thing I could write that would make any difference to her.
And I have to tell you: I had no idea that I'd finish this blog entry feeling that way. I thought I'd just bitch about how my book idea got a flat tire. Instead, writing about the flat tire made me see it differently.
Comments
I get frustrated as well
Only one other person who knows me also knows about my other side. Thankfully she is very supportive when we get together we have a nice 'girls night in'. We have great fun giving each other a make over from time to time.
As for writing, my family know that I have a mild form of Dyslexia so don't expect me to write much. Actually I find that writing helps me overcome that problem. Still, I do have regrets that my Family don't know about the real me. They won't know either until after my Mother dies. I am sure that I'm not alone in this.
Writing is a creative outlet for me.
I think I understand...
My family actually knows I wrote a few things here, and one even read a bit. But, the only stuff they're INTERESTED in reading more of is mainstream... I got a little writing done this past August, but not much else in the past year (life has gotten in the way, as it tends to do). But, none of the writing I did in August was on my "mainstream" project. *sighs* (Though some here have seen, and apparently welcomed, part of the results of the August writing, and some more may see the light of day "soon".)
Frustrating. Best wishes to you, and I wish you could share the rest of your writing with at least SOME of your family.
For what it is worth ...
From my vantage point, your writing would be fit as a children's, or young adult fare. You don't do anything immoral at all. I think one of your stories has the boy actually being a girl and they found out when she started her menses. Or was it that other writer who was publishing about your time? I'll be darned if I can think of her name. She's Mormon. That's right Callie Way, or something. OH, yeah, Megan Campbell.
That's right, your character is in New York or some place in the house with the tunnel to the street. Hmmm Perhaps it is time for a re-read? Right on !!!
I love your writing.
Gwen
LBGT books...
are becoming more and more mainstream all the time. If you're talking about large New York publishing houses, no, not really. But the small/independent press, then yes, it's becoming more and more mainstream. Then there is the self-publishing world, if you want to try your hand at that.
I understand the difficulty with family and TG lit.
Some of my family members have run across my LinkedIn page, where I have my e-books linked, so my grandma and at least two of my aunts have grabbed copies of my published books. I've asked them not to read them, since I don't think they'd be comfortable with the subject matter, but they are members of my family who already knew about my gender issues, so at least THAT part isn't as big an issue.
Still, it's pretty nerve-wracking when you want to talk to family about your writing, but have to hide a critical element of the story.
Melanie E.
Flat Tire????????????
It would have been great if your daughter had loved your book's synopsis.
Great and rather coincidental. When you and your daughter go to Barnes and Noble do you buy the same books or even shop in the same aisles? What books have your daughter read in the last six months that you've also read and enjoyed? Does she normally read romantic comedies? What recently published romantic comedies have you read?
I've written a number of non-tg books (unpublished). I've allowed hundreds of people to read them and had good reviews from mostly all but my daughter and my wife. They loves sci-fi and I don't write sci-fi. That doesn't mean my writing sucks. It simply means two readers who I would love to entertain aren't interested in my genre.
There are many, many people who love The Great Gatsby and at least as many who think it stinks.
It could be you love to write character-driven novels and your daughter likes plot-driven books. It could be a dozen different things that don't add up to you tossing your project.
Fill in those plot holes and move forward. Do you really want to write non-fiction?
Good luck.
Jill
Angela Rasch (Jill M I)
You're right
Thanks, Jill - your comments made me smile, and yes, you're right. The story isn't anything like what my daughter enjoys, so it is silly of me to get blown out by her lack of enthusiasm.
I've got to follow my own sense of what to write.
Thanks.