I've been working slowly on a story over at Fiction Branches on Sapphire's Place. I had the basic idea for this sci-fi story universe some time ago, and I decided I could shoehorn it into the "You Are What You Wish" storyline, and then take steps to minimize the magic wishing stone's impact on my chosen storyline. I'm hoping to eventually move the "Futuretech" storyline to some sort of conclusion or at least a major chapter that can be posted here at Big Closet. I did get permission from the other contributors to do so.
I was hoping to inspire some of the regular contributors over there to run with my example and post more than single-paragraph PWP plot germs to my storyline. I did get a few nibbles, but interest seemed to peter out, and I'm currently stuck.
Here's the entire Futuretech story tree, including contributions by others to my storyline: Alternate Realtity: Futuretech.
The latest episode I've added and currently want to pursue is here: Chatroom Log. BTW, it might not be immediately obvious without a detailed reading of the earlier chapters: the "Senior Prank" is scheduled for the wednesday after spring break, and at that point in the story it's still late tuesday afternoon the day before.
I'm currently stuck for ideas on exactly where to take it from there. My nebulous goals include as little use of the stone and the ARDs as possible.
If you feel inspired to dive right in and start adding somewhere in that tree, go right ahead. :) Just one caveat: PeacockFeather's contribution, where Jon actually torqued the device and succeeded in making a girl with the Replomat, was very entertaining, but that's just not the storyline I want to work on. I wasn't able to secure PF's permission for reposting that segment elsewhere anyway.
Oh, and there's a virtual cookie for the first person who spots the various pop culture references I stuck in that last chapter. :)
UnSub
FutureTech World
I decided to start posting what I already had, and maybe get some more eyeballs on the story and contributors over at FB: FutureTech 01.
All those keywords I selected are what I have in mind for the story's eventual direction. Do they all belong on that first segment, or should I restrict the keywords to just the elements as currently posted? I understand that now that I have a story posted here, a mod will be along to change my account type and allow me edit access to go back into that story and fix things, right?
UnSub
UnSub
I looked it over
I don't know. The branch where there's a wishing stone that has incredible powers AND a machine that can change sex and create life seems to be completely bogged down in minutia. Logically, a stone like that and/or a machine that can make anything is too powerful for a story, and way too powerful for kids to play around with. Having god-like power requires god-like uses for it, and what they're doing with it is pretty trivial. I don't see anywhere to go with that story line -- there's no tension there.
The second storyline, where a class is thinking about changing sex for a photo shoot as a prank, is sort of "eh," too. In that world, changing sex is no big deal, so the whole event takes on the importance of everyone coming to school on that day in florescent orange shirts and blouses. Once again, as it exists, there is no tension to it. Whatever you do, I'd get rid of the legalese. It was boring and in the end it didn't matter anyway, so why include it?
There are a few storylines that come to mind, but I'm not so sure that a branch story could handle it very well. Branch stories, in my opinion, are more suited to action. Unless it's played for laughs, TG is personal and, as such, a TG story is a personal vision. To me, the real story starts when one becomes the other and has to deal with the changes. Others with a different vision find a story interesting when the central character understands that he or she should be the other sex and gradually takes steps to achieve that goal, or is led by the hand to that conclusion, or simply wants to be free to dress and "get comfortable" as the other sex for a while. It's pretty much whatever kind of TG floats your boat.
Since I'm the "change and deal with it" type, here are a few loose thoughts that more or less follow the "prank" storyline:
A plan is in the works to mess with the class shoot by dressing as the opposite sex. Most of the classmates go the cosmetic route, but one, deciding to be cool, decides to go all the way. The formerly wealthy parents, after a major financial reversal, are furious that their son just spent what they've saved for his college education on a full-fledged sex change. They can't afford to pay to have her sex-change reversed, and force him to remain as a girl for the rest of High School.
Here, you can go a variety of ways:
For laughs ...
The girls don't accept her as one of them, and the guys think she's "kinda gay." The old girlfriend is pissed and dumps him for a guy, his buddies start making passes, and any chance at a basketball scholarship is bye-bye. In desperation, she goes to another High School. There, she can never admit that she was once a guy. She tries out for the basketball team and makes it, and is good enough for a scholarship, which will provide her eventually with a good job that will allow her to afford a sex-change, but that forces her to stay a girl until she graduates college. While she is going to college, she begins to have these "gay" feelings, and she makes it with a guy in her senior year when she gets drunk. She comes to like him, but not enough to stay a woman. She gets a job and starts to make decent money, then reads a recent study that it's dangerous to switch back. Very grudgingly, she accepts the inevitable and gets married to the guy that loves her, figuring that if she can't be a guy, it's better than staying alone for the rest of her life. After the marriage, she discovers that the study was flawed and it's really okay to become a guy again, but she just spent all her savings on a down payment for a house. She starts planning secretly for a divorce, and starts working hard to raise the money again, but then finds out that somehow, despite her precautions, she's pregnant. She goes outside and screams for a while, then comes back inside. Her husband asks her what's wrong. She says, "Nothing," but obviously doesn't mean it and refuses to explain. He mutters something about moody women.
You could play it serious ...
He switches for the prank and can't get back for any number of reasons: his original DNA was lost through a screw-up; they find that his male DNA is flawed, and that he would suffer some degenerative disease if he returned to being a guy again; there is no money for him to turn back; his parents are punishing him for spending all their money; they are a little San Fransisco loopy -- they always wanted a girl and are holding out, hoping that she decides to stay one, encouraging her "feminine side" at every turn (which could be hilarious).
Initially, she fights it, but gradually:
After a series of events where she has to succeed as herself she realizes that life isn't so bad as a girl (gradual, mature reconciliation).
With the intervention of her former best friend she comes to terms with it (love story).
With the intervention of her former girlfriend, who refuses to be her girl friend until she accepts the inevitable, she comes around (a friendship bond that lasts through it all).
These are just a bunch of common TG ideas, but, who knows, they might work for what you have in mind. Good luck with it.
Aardvark
"Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony."
Mahatma Gandhi
"Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony."
Mahatma Gandhi
Thanks
Thanks for your feedback! Very much appreciated.
I'd like this story to be about Jon & Karyn, who are from our mundane reality. To them, the sex changing will be a very big deal, even if it isn't to the natives of this new world they're in. I think a story about them rather than about the natives of this 'verse would help alleviate some of your 'eh' feelings.
You're absolutely right about how the wishing stone is incredibly powerful, and tension-destroying. I'm moving towards just outright taking the stupid thing away from them, and probably the ARDs while I'm at it. That should help ratchet up the tension I think. :)
As far as the machine creating life... I've already restricted my branches away from that, and I won't be working on any of the others in which it turned out to be possible. I've got a few half-baked notions for the thread where it appeared like they had created an extension that can make a person, but it turns out they've really created a walk-in gender-changing machine. :) But even that's a lot more powerful than I had originally intended, so I won't be spending much time on it.
In my vision of this 'verse, the Replomat can make an amazing number of things, but it's not unlimited. They can't make this reality's version of an MAU, or even just another Replomat with it, for example. How would Hitek stay in business if people could? :) I started to build on that with the mention of "replicator-grade" products.
I'm sorry you didn't like the "legalese". Which part(s) of it did you find boring and unnecessary? I came up with that as background material, and elements that force Jon and Karyn into going along with the Prank. I wanted there to be logical reasons for this 'verse and the Prank to be "just so". I wanted the originators of the Prank to have their reasons for coming up with something more involved than the "orange shirts" idea, which I also more or less dispensed with when I had them consider the idea of faux-uniforms. "Been there, done that."
Most of the stuff that authors throw in their segments on FB tend to just come out of left field. They post a sentence or paragraph that matches their particular kink, and don't even give any thoughts to things like logic, character development, or plot. They hope their single paragraph will be enough for someone else to run with it and create a whole interesting story for them, but it doesn't happen. There are some beautiful exceptions to that general tendency, but they are hard to find on that site. :(
Your ideas for the 'verse sound very good, even though they don't quite match my vision for the tech. They'd work well as offshoots of storyline branches on FB from before I nailed down how much an MAU session costs and the easy availability of cosmetic-only Changes.
I'm thinking that in this 'verse, a full MAU Change costs about the price of an low-end car. It's something that most people can afford, but not on a whim. Under normal circumstances, no one will get stuck presenting as a gender they don't wish to be, even if they can't come up with the MAU fees, because there are cheaper cosmetic-only changes available. Now that former basketball star might still have a problem with his new shorter stature if he couldn't pay the full freight to get back to his former height... :) Major changes like that will remain in the MAU-realm for this 'verse. I've already touched on that in one of the other FB threads.
So anyway, what I'm really looking for is ideas for what should happen to Jon & Karyn in this 'verse, rather than natives.
UnSub
UnSub