So I get home this morning after slaving for the man. Delivering papers is harder than people would think (and I have one unaccounted for, damn it). My roommate tells me that about 5 cop cars were at the house at 5 a.m. All the cops asked was if she had called 911 and if she was alone. I have no idea what that was about, but me and the Tampa Police Department is like a marriage that ended in a nasty murder/suicide (Really, really, really bad). So, outside of worrying that the cops are out to fuck with me again, I don't know if there is anything to worry about. Maybe someone did call 911 and gave my address. Maybe they turned down the wrong street (Possible because the streets go 12th, 11th, Alaska, 10th, 9th) and I had them come out before looking for 10th street. Then I go to bed, I was really tired. Around noon there is pounding on my door, cop pounding. Cops take a door pounding class, because there is no mistaken it. If you've never had a cop pound on your door take my word for it. I was wrong, however. It wasn't the cops. It was the US FUCKING Marshall. On the badge it says on top US and on the bottom it says Marshall and in the middle in a script type font is actually the word fucking. As in, all that was going through my mind is "Fuck, I'm Fucked."

Turns out, the US Marshall has the right address. Damn! Can't I be left alone. But, they weren't looking for me. They were looking for those rat bastard thieving ex-roommates of mine. (Rat bastard thieving is actually a legal term that cops use all the time, look it up). Turns out that not only being wanted in questioning for molesting his 8 year old niece with a fork [he explained it to me, actually bragged, and yes it is as disgusting as it sounds], skipping a court appearance in Alabama, and general assholedness... he is actually wanted by the U.S. Army, and not in the way Uncle Sam wants people. Turns out he was stealing brass from the base there near Dothan Alabama. He told me about that too. Thinking back on it, I thought he was saying grass, as in pot (he is a big pothead) and I was wondering why the fuck would the army be growing pot and just thought he was high. Of course, I don't know where this moron is now, if I did I would be in prison again for another reason. However, now I will be on the lookout for the mother fucker. Maybe there is a reward. Maybe since he wanted to take the army's brass they will fill him with lead.

I'm not in trouble, but how the hell am I go to fall back asleep after I thought I was getting raided by the Marshalls. That being said, The Test Taker might be delayed further, or maybe not. I'm not wide awake but I see sleep eluding me. I got eggs boiled, and they will become a salad shortly.

BTW, if I suddenly vanish, come up with a good conspiracy, it will probably be true. I looked at the sheriff's website, I have no warrants. I don't know if that counts for the city PD as well.

TTFN.

The Outlaw,

K.T. Leone