In this season of Advent, a time of joy and peace perhaps for everyone, regardless of beliefs, I am so glad to be a part of this community. I was blessed several times this morning, even as it is pouring outside, with hope and joy from reading stories here.

I wanted to report that my wife is doing well after her surgery; she is walking without a crutch, but her knee is painful. The clutch went on our car, but we'll be able to get our other car on the road. My son blessed us last night. He received a refund check for the balance of his unused money at college and he turned around and gave it to us to repair the car.

My day is going to be a long struggle and I covet your thoughts and prayers. We'll be getting together with my brothers and my late sister's former husband and their families. Since our last meeting much earlier in the year I have had more flashbacks; my mother and father both had been sexually inappropriate to me and my father molested my sister, which was verified by her therapist. I am bound to keep my peace because of the hurt it would inflict on all of them if I shared what I know. My younger brother wants to visit my father's grave, which would be an extremely painful event for me but for the fact that I have forgiven my parents.

While the memories are painful, they are decreasing in strength as I do not allow the 'ghosts of the past' any room any more in my life. Letting go isn't easy by anyone's estimation, but it is possible. Nothing can change what my father and mother did or didn't do to our loss and pain other than what I can do. I forgave them a decade ago for what I knew they did. It makes it not easy but possible to forgive them now.

As we all celebrate in one fashion or another the holiday season, it is my fervent wish and prayer that we all enjoy the peace and joy of the times; an advent of healing and strength and peace for all of us. For my sisters and brothers here, may you all know love and hope. Buono Natale, mi sorella e fratello! Andrea