I wasn't crazy about the idea, but my sister had a way of talking anyone into doing anything. She often had me doing things that I was more than a bit apprehensive about.
She got me to dance, which I considered to be more than a little bit 'Girly'. She'd play Mom's old 45's. The 'Big Bopper', Buddy Holly, Hell, even 'Kookie' Ed Byrnes! from "77 Sunset Strip". She had this entire routine choreographed to "Kookie, Kookie, lend me your comb". It was Hilarious!!!
On more than one occasion we entertained family and friends with that routine. She was in Heaven. I was just glad to be receiving some attention for something that didn't involve athletic prowess or intellect. The former of which I had too little, the latter of which I had a bit too much.
Anywho, the Halloween party for my Cub Scout troop was coming up and guess who was struck with a bolt of genius from the heavens? That's right, You guessed it. My evil genius of an older sister. Okay, she really wasn't evil, but it sure seemed that way to me at the time.
Her brilliant idea was for me to go as a 'Gypsy.' Not a male Gypsy with a headband and earring, possibly a gold tooth mind you, but as a 'FEMALE-type, Belly-Dancer-type Gypsy!!!
Well, Mom and Grandma thought it was a great idea. I still wasn't convinced. That is until I saw the dress that my Sister had in mind. It was PERFECT!!! I didn't even know that she owned such a thing. It was a peasant dress with full billowing sleeves, and floor-length for modesty's sake. (Thank God!) It was a small floral print with a blue bodice and swath around the knees and ankles. The rest was red with the same floral print.
I knew this would work.
By the time I was 'accessorized' I couldn't believe the reflection that stared back at me. The gold-hooped (clip-on) earrings, Mom's long auburn wig, topped off with a red silk bandanna, four or five gold bracelets on each wrist, and a beautiful gold sort of bangly-dangly belt around my waist.
It was stunning, in more ways than one.
They still weren't finished though. How much more could there be? Well that's when I had my first experience with make-up. Rouge, eye-shadow, mascara, lipstick, and even false eyelashes for God's Sake! They were having Way Too Much fun with all of this!
Some knee-high black leather boots (which required a bit of getting used to) And Mom's gold pendant completed "The Look".
I was sure I'd win the costume contest.
I didn't.
Some fool with a 'Nixon' mask did. How much creativity did that take?!!! The guy was being impeached!;0 Of course, I had no clue what that meant. I just knew he did something wrong.
One of life's lasting lessons. If you screw up, you'll be remembered.
My Scoutmaster confirmed the point. Bobbing for apples, I got dunked. In the process Mom's pendant was removed from it's chain.
I was devastated.
Not due to embarrassment, but 'cuz I broke Mom's necklace.
That hurt.
Comments
This is a great start Jonelle.
I know the pain of not wanting to post the things that haunt us to no end. Send me a private message and I will tell you what I was forced to endure for 5½ years. I say forced because at 12 years old it was way beyond my control to stop.
In Chrissie I have written about my life as a pre-adolescent. I had a lot of fun during those years. But mother took all that away from me. In book 2 is where it gets very painful and is taking a long time to get through. But I know the pain, and I know the shame. But I will write this book, if to only show the mainstream that their perception of "the system" is very wrong. But it will take me a while because of the demons that haunt me through and through. I know about the scars left on the soul and the holes that will never heal.
I do hope that you can continue, but for what it is worth, I know why you can't. Maybe someday like you said, you will be able to finish this. But for now there is no reason to relive what you went through. Thank you for sharing what you have though.
"With confidence and forbearance, we will have the strength to move forward."
Love & hugs,
Barbara
"If I have to be this girl in me, Then I have the right to be."
"With confidence and forbearance, we will have the strength to move forward."
Love & hugs,
Barbara
"If I have to be this girl in me, Then I have the right to be."
Scouts Halloween Party or (my first time 'out')
Jonelle, if telling the rest of the story is so painful, I will wait until you are ready to post it.
May Your Light Forever Shine
May Your Light Forever Shine
Dear heart
...none of us need to know anything. And you will write or not as you feel safe and comfortable. Don't feel obligated at all. You've already blessed us with your 'first time,' which is a great beginning for us as we grow to know you through your writing. My thanks to your for trusting us with your heart.
She was born for all the wrong reasons
but grew up for all the right ones
Con grande amore e di affetto, Andrea Lena
Love, Andrea Lena
Need to Know
RAMI
Unless you want to tell it, and feel comfortable doing so, No One Needs To Know. If you do answer any P.M.'s please be careful in revealing anything that can come back to haunt you.
The only real reason to reveal anything either in private or in public is if it helps you work through your stress, or helps to overcome the pain associated with what occurred to you.
We must be about the same age, because I was in Cub Scouts at about the same time, late 1950s. You weren't in my Pack because I do not remember any event that would have had costumes like that
;_)
RAMI
RAMI
story
jonelle;
it would be nice to know but private thoughts are just that. PRIVATE
robert
First time.
Firstly Jonelle, let me be another one to welcome a new author to Big Closet.
You'll find this mostly a friendly supportive site as many many others have had experiences of childhoods from just plain hurtful down to brutally traumatic (both physically and mentally.)
My advice is 'Take your time!' Don't do anything that you don't want to do.
You are by no-means obliged to post anything that wounds you or embarrasses you but as you get to know Big Closet and navigate your way around it, I'm sure you'll find it one of the most supportive and constructive sites on the web.
Loved the story. It's got potential if you're prepared to expand it.
Good luck and take care,
Beverly.
Dear One
Thank you for sharing. It is never easy to share things that have hurt. Hopefully this sharing of a little of it will help heal. we share our love and Light with you and the Blessings of the Goddess
3 out of 5 boxes of tissue(just from what i feel fo what it means to you ) and 6 gold stars
Goddess Bless you
Love Desiree
Goddess Bless you
Love Desiree
feelings
Your story has a lot of feelings that some of us go thru ... all the wierdos in my mind want to know . My Helloween experience was different .. but it was an awakeining of the inner self , a wanting , never to be fufulled .. if you can find the time to share so much the better .... inquiring minds want to know ... we share the feeling .. thank you for this start .. I hope you can come to gripps with your demons and find peace ..... Rone Welles oxox
Wonderful start
This is a wonderful start to what appears to be a fiction story (but clearly is not), and I guess most of us can visualise the ways in which sad, sad people might hurt you.
Two things to give comfort: The first is what many before have said: this is a nice place where fellow-minded people can come and expose as much - or as little - as they please, without the pain you can get in the outside world.
Secondly, I believe fiction writing is a superb forum for making things happen which don't happen in the other world. Maybe you could finish the story in a way you would like it to have happened, rather than the way it did.
Never forget, that some of the greatest social change has occurred through fiction writers such as Dickens and Twain, who expose the evils of the world and show all how it should be done.
We should all aspire to do that.
I PM'd but...
I wanted to post to this too. I really respect you writing about something painful and still being able to share with us here. You can write something down somewhere all day but it's not the same as letting it out into the world.
Bailey Summers
this part was good
sorry that what happened after must have been so bad. Hugs.
"Treat everyone you meet as though they had a sign on them that said "Fragile, under construction"
dorothycolleen