by Edeyn Hannah Blackeney
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That's the cursor. My hands are on the keyboard. The text editor is open... and nothing is being written.
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Thing is, it's really hard to be "inspired" and make use of creativity, tap into that muse... when you don't feel like you deserve it.
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I used to be good at writing. I used to be able to crank out the stories and poems and just... enjoyed it.
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But then I was accused of doing something terrible, horrible, no-good, and really bad. Then it turned out that even though I didn't know I had done it, I was the one responsible for it.
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I did my best to apologize and even try to explain (though I really had no idea about it myself). Then... the theories began as to the why.
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One theory was that I did it all on purpose, with forethought and malice, to have material to write about. Since it was known that I was a writer, this seemed to be to most... kinda plausible.
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I haven't really been able to write anything of substantial volume since then.
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It's been more or less a year. And it's not getting any easier.
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I've written some.
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But just not a lot.
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I've even tried to begin the reworking of my older stuff to see if that helped.
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See how much it helped?
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I'm not sure if I'll ever recover from this downturn.
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But I do know if I don't...
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I'll really never be truly happy again...
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It's almost hypnotic.
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The cursor.
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Comments
Heavy
I really don't know what to say except SHIT HAPPENS! I have been at the edge of the abyss many times. Just don't let them push you over it.
Hilltopper
I know what you mean, but with me
it is my dyslexic fingers. I swear, it's the truth. I will write a good chapter and after editing it and posting I find more and more mistakes. Like omitted words, words running together, words turned around by someone who might be dyslexic, words that only have part of the letters. Then I go over the story again, only to find more mistakes. This is the second edit already, and I am ready to post, until I notice another mistake on the last line. So I go back to the top and re-do it again. Third edit. Finally after posting 3 or 4 times, I am finally done editing. No more mistakes. Phewwwww. That was exhausting.
So don't let not being able to write because your muse decided to take the day or week off. Perserverance pays off, but you have to keep at it.
This was a humorous write on a serious subject, but it all worked out well. The purpose of why we write in the first place is to entertain our readers. And that is exactly what you have done here. Thank you for sharing, and take care. :-)
"With confidence and forbearance, we will have the strength to move forward."
Love & hugs,
Barbara
"If I have to be this girl in me, Then I have the right to be."
"With confidence and forbearance, we will have the strength to move forward."
Love & hugs,
Barbara
"If I have to be this girl in me, Then I have the right to be."
Edeyn
WE all grow older. We all make mistakes. We all live thorough changes that seem to take away things that we knew were important.
There are consolations though. Being Smart, and clever, and talented helps. Mostly though, you just do your best. When you make a mistake, you apologize as soon as possible, you work to fix whatever you broke, and you
hope the people you hurt know this too.
We all grow older, but then... mistakes do too. That's the nice part
of aging. The people you hurt, they come around sometimes, in time. Sometimes, the hurts just don't seem as important.
Take care of you, Edeyn.
Sarah
Edeyn
You are one of my favourite authors here and I like your stories as you write them. You are the author, you are telling the story, not them (whoever they are), so don´t let talk into your writing. If they don´t like it, they don´t have read it. It is that simple. Everyone of us is little different and have a little different tastes. Thats human. What is sadly also human, is that people complain, talk behind your back and sometimes even humiliate you. There is no other defense than to say that their opinion doesn´t matter at all. You know the truth and many other see it too. Don´t let the minority opinion take away from something what you like to do and in what you are really good at.
So head up!!! I want to see another story from you! And kick those dumbasses to their asses!
Cheering
Robin
Bad
I can sure tell you that I know how you feel. Nobody wants to hear the details but after my attack I didn't write for almost two years. My muse left me and my love of writing died. It was Angel's challenge that tempted me to try writing again. Kind comments gave me a little confidence so I started writing Time Rip. I still don't have a lot of confidence but the desire to tell a fun tale is here now and I'm doing my best to please the readers.
Edeyn, whatever happened is in the past. Please don't beat yourself up about it. I have read some of your prior work and you have great talent. I hope that your muse will inspire you to write again. Maybe just a short story - a fun fantasy to get those creative juices flowing again. I would love to see your work again and I know that others would too.
Sorry for being wordy; just trying to help in my own clumsy way.
Good luck and my best,
DS
Long ago, I saw myself as a
Long ago, I saw myself as a writer. I suppose I was a writer. I wrote stories and poetry, even the odd essay. The thing was, I forgot to maintain my gift. Any skill, even one that comes almost as a talent, has to be practiced, or you can lose it. I started blogging off and on a couple of years ago, and I think I've recovered some, but the spark of inspiration is gone. I can write, but it's as though I have run out of ideas. I think I understand some of what you're experiencing.
Jaye
The most common form of despair comes from not being who you are. - Soren Kierkegaard
I'm sorry
you seem very sad, and that's never a great place to be in. Since I've been coming here I've seen some of your writing and looked back on some more of it as well. I think you're probably as clever a writer as I've seen here, and maybe elsewhere as well. Thank you!