This week has been a staycation one of those times when you have to use vacation time to avoid losing out. We are saving up for a big vacation next year and so our time this year is spent at home. My wife was out of the house all day today and I had an early morning errand to run, so I got dressed in my feminine best and went out. (My wife knows I do this, so don't think I was sneaking out.)
After my errand, I went to my local J C Penney store and found the women's department under construction. I'm not sure just what they are doing, but things seem to be jumbled up and the usual fitting rooms were not available. The only fitting rooms were in lingerie area. Now I've been in the fitting rooms before, but usually, there's no one there to say yea or nay as to who goes in or with how much. Pretty trusting folks I guess.
Today I was looking for a skirt and wasn't sure of the brand I found, so what size I really needed was in question. Also there was also a pair of shorts and a top that seemed like it would be a nice. My usual practice in stores, if the fitting rooms aren't isolated as has been the case at Penney's before is simply to ask if I can try on and see where they send me. Years ago, at a K-mart when I had just decided to make it a rule that if I couldn't try on, I didn't buy, the attendant sent me to the men's fitting room. Likewise for a couple of other stores in my area. However of late, the women's fitting room seems to be for trying on women's clothes. Be that as it may, I'm willing to allow each store to send me to a room where my plumbing matches the rest of the shoppers, however, I'm not so sure I'd actually go. More likely, given the attitude of many stores I've been in recently, I'd just take my money else where. But I digress.
The check stand was right in front of the check out at the lingerie section, so I waited for the attendant to notice me standing there. She smiled and nodded saying she'd be with me in a minute. I think she saw me looking at the fitting room door and after only few moments, she looked at me, pointed at the door and motioned with her head, and whispered, "Go right on in."
Now, I know that I really don't look good enough to "pass" on looks alone. I've been "sired" even when wearing a very feminine top with good make up and a prominent bust line showing. However, it seems that when I simply act like I belong, I receive the acceptance of women, both store clerks and women shoppers alike. If I have any reaction it'll come from a man.
OPINION: I think that women are more likely to accept a feminine man than a man is. It seems they (the women) respect a man who wants to get in touch with his feminine side, but men seem to feel threatened by the idea a man could be feminine.
Oh well, I'm a happy feminine man... a male lesbian, if you will.
Comments
Staycations
I haven't been on holiday/vacation for a few years now (but then again I'm a student ... so maybe it's all a vacation? ;) )
I hope you're able to have a lovely time when you actually get to go somewhere exciting!
I'm not so sure on the idea that women are more likely to accept a feminine man. Perhaps compared to men, then the opinion remains just as true. But otherwise I think it depends on maturity level - a lot of people I have met seem to see anything challenging heteronormacy as an insult? I don't know. It's an interesting observation, though.
I hope that I may be bold enough to do as you do, but alas, for me it is the internet (the dominion of the shy, cowardly, or crazy? :p ) which allows me to spread my metaphorical wings. (I fear Kmart etc may be too close to the sun, as it were)
xx
Amy
I Suspect
That larger store managements have told their workers to allow nicely dressed, somewhat masculine shoppers to use lady's fitting rooms if they want. There is somewhat more publicity about children and teens transitioning and things like the Canadian model getting into the Miss World pageant.
Many of the largest corporations have become more sensitive to LGBTQ people, customers, their workers, etc. With the poorer economy, some of the conservative bias is ignored in order to gain more sales. If someone looks like she won't cause a scene, they let her into "wimyn's space" to hopefully have her make a purchase.
Hugs and Bright Blessings,
Renee
Corporate Policy
I know that Mervyns had a policy that anyone could use any fitting room they wanted. They even had a sign by the fitting room in the women's department stating that was their policy. I decided to test it one day and try on a kind of pushup bra that I'd not seen before by asking the attendant where I could try on the bra and she directed me to the fitting room right there. I was dress in male mode at the time.
Even before that, in the early nineties on my way home from work, I had to stop by Sears for something and as is my custom, I detoured through the women's department for a look-see and spotted a dress that really took my eye. It was about the time that I had decided to not buy if I couldn't try on. So in my very male work uniform, I took the dress to the counter and asked if there was someplace I could try it on. I would have been happy, at that point to be directed to a men's fitting room, however the lady pointed to the fitting rooms just behind the counter. I marched in in all my masculine glory and tried on the dress. Unfortunately, they didn't have my size.
In the early eighties, I was on vacation in Billings Montana, of all places, and happened to be at the local mall by myself. As I walked by the open Montgomery Wards (remember Monkey Wards?) I decided to browse through the dresses and wish. As I was looking a young salesclerk asked if she could help me. I replied, that I was just looking. As I continued to look an evil thought occurred to me. "I bet it would blow her small town mind if I told her I wanted to try on a dress." The more I thought about it them more I wanted to do it. Expecting a negative reaction and knowing I'd never see her again, I inquired about the possibility. She was more than happy to help pick out one that would fit and showed me to the fitting rooms right there in the department. She was so accommodating that even though I didn't really want the dress, I bought it anyway. That experience was the turning point in my deciding that I wouldn't buy anything I couldn't try on. If a young clerk in small town Billings Montana was willing to allow me to try on when in male mode then surely the bigger markets like Portland would as well. It took a few years for me to actually put that into practice every where.
Hugs
Patricia
Happiness is being all dressed up and HAVING some place to go.
Semper in femineo gerunt
Ich bin ein femininer Mann