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AND DON'T DO IT AGAIN!
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This is one of the messages I received re 'Goodbye Master Stokes' (from an anonymous reader on another site) when I looked at my inbox this morning.
I've been standing in the corner hanging my head ever since.
Incredibly well written. You are a real talent. Descriptions get me there in an instant (and I have never been in England), the main character is totally credible and natural. And the reading leaves a warm and pleasant feeling, gives a lot of food for thought. A dish that is both delicious and nutritious. I'd think this might not be the end of the story. Have the feeling that Peter will not surrender to being past that easily. It would be interesting to see the character evolution to understanding her/himself as a personality. Physical gender is easy, but the personality is far more complex than it, or even the self-perceived gender. From what is written until now, I'd guess that the character will accept being and feeling female, but wouldn't like to surrender a big part of what Peter is - a part that typically is perceived by most people as male personality. Probably she will try to explain this to herself in the easy ways first - will try to perceive herself as a tomboy, as one who fears the true transition, as some kind of "queer" etc. Probably there will be swinging back and forth between different degrees of gender mix, maybe including total denial of one of the genders (or another, at another time). And I'd guess that eventually she will come to the perception that she is a human being first, and the gender is somewhat secondary in her. That she has no problems being female, but as a personality would prefer to be part Carolyn and part Peter... or maybe all of Carolyn and all of Peter together. Just musing... :-)
As if that wasn't enough, another e-mail told me the story was shaping up really well and hoped I'd continue with it. This has been the theme of just about every piece of feedback I've been given on the latest chapter.
There are only so many times you can add two and two together and come up with an answer other than 'it isn't finished, dickhead'.
So as soon as I can prise the dunce's cap from my head I'll get working on a sequel.
Comments
Touch, you said it yourself,
from an anonymous reader on another site
They were not from ours.
However, from what I gleam from that person's feelings in what was written, they were probably hoping you would dig deeper into the psyche of the character for them. I think for that person, the "meat" of the story is in how that character's psychology plays out and their thoughts. I have to admit even I am curious.
So what I am trying to say is not to take this person's comment negatively. It is something akin to the type of comments I make, although I don't ask an author to change the story. To see how this person's comments are similar to mine, look at my rantings in the comments of The Taylor Project by Tracey Willows.
I love her story and it hits raw nerves in me left and right.
I am suggesting this person is similar to that effect towards your writing.
What I feel is you have a fan of your writing Touch. You sparked something within them and they are craving something within the story. I would suggest to look at this situation from a different more positive aspect perhaps?
You do write extremely well.
And this has all the hallmarks of a fan request or even a subtle challenge.
Sephrena
Agree with Sephy
I know writers who would kill to have this kind of feedback from readers. This person obviously likes your ideas, likes your writing, and loves your characters. They want to see more about the protagonist, and that is a good thing. When you get that level of involvement from your readers you know you are getting it right. You've triggered a hunger in your readers, whether you feed that hunger is up to you. These readers are confident in your ability to look deeper into your protagonist, they have a belief in your writing skills being up to the task.
This is a major compliment.
"Life is not measured by the breaths you take, but by the moments that take your breath away.”
George Carlin
In Case Anyone Else Gets The Wrong Idea
I took this message as a massive compliment. In fact I was completely blown away by its insightful analysis of the character I'd created. The shame I felt was solely due to having abandoned her before the story had reached its natural conclusion.
I'd never complain publicly about negative comments. Everyone's entitled to an opinion. As David Bowie said in his introduction to one of the episodes in the TV series The Hunger, if you want to change the world you must accept the judgement of the world.
In this case, that judgement seems to be that I've left a story unfinished. After the end notes to the final chapter I thought it only fair to explain why I've changed my mind.
You have the rappor
all authors crave to have then ^^
If both you and your fans agree something is unfinished, find the means, motive, and method to carry your character onwards in a new story or continuation.
Authors and readership should work together to make a story more than just "a story."
Make it an experience to be shared together.
Sephrena
your stories. You have a
your stories. You have a loyal following here and elsewhere. THAT is truly the best compliment you can get, to me.
May Your Light Forever Shine
Not a sequel ...
... merely a continuation of an unfinished story. Although 'merely' is a poor word to use for your output. I agree with everything your correspondent wrote.
Robi
Nice to hear you are seriously considering continuing...
the story or writing a second *book*.
DO take a little time to re-read what you have so far, plus any notes or incomplete bits not posted . Then and only then continue.
You have a golden opportunity here to FIX things if you think it necessary. Make sure your are not *painted into a corner* or other traps a writer may fall prey to. Treat what is posted so far as a first draft or a beta test.
I agree with your commenter, she will NOT be your average girl. Oh she is a pragmatist and knows she always WAS a girl, just one hurt by the cruel trick this drug did to her developing embryo.
But then she likely never would have been born without the drug sooo..
One thing... as this tale is inspired by the DES babies and other prenatal drug induced problems/scandals, your heroine's family would be well advised to get frequent PAID IN FULL heath screenings for as long as she lives as part of any settlement for their silence... Mind you offering to let the drug company see the data so they and the doctors will learn from it would make them far more eager to agree.
DES had a high risk of causing certain cancers, reproductive system cancers?, in babies exposed to it so I HOPE in your not quite real world this fictitious drug is less dangerous. Mind you not every unborn exposed to DES was harmed, but some were .'
You have us interested in your characters. No wonder we want more.
And is the special school for the victims/transformees a good one and the fellow student was kidding them or is this a place to hide societies embarrassing *mistakes*? IE will the school make or break our heroine?
But then us readers can be greedy.
As to Karen_J saying how some writers would kill for comments like the one you got... I would not KILL for a comment like that but I might be willing to maim a little.
-- grin --
John in Wauwatosa
John in Wauwatosa
This Was Never About DES
Thanks for your comment, John.
When I first conceived this story I'd never heard of DES, the drug I invented was based on a Wikipaedia article which stressed that there were no long-term effects and that the condition it caused was largely self-correcting. I therefore assumed it would be a convenient plot device to change my main character from male to female without too much extra baggage.
The school is employing a hands-off approach, principally because the staff have no experience of m to f transformations and are content to let their charges adjust to their new gender in their own way. They think they're being progressive when in fact they're just scared of being sued.
This was supposed to be a romp. Somehow I let the fun get away from me. I hope I can soon put that right.