As I've explained elsewhere before, I'm a straight, married, male crossdresser. As a class, we're famous for living so deep in the closet, we can't see what we're doing. :) I've read the stories of those who, taken with a bout of guilt, stress, or recent threat of discovery, "purge" their entire collections of mtf goodies: clothes, makeup, wigs, shoes, everything.
Well, I've never had that problem.
I've been very protective of my "stuff". Early on, I found it incredibly difficult to acquire. Each acquisition involved massive anxiety, to the point I almost blacked out buying it. I'd always swear that was the last thing I was going to buy. Ha.
Truth is, until a few years ago, when I busted out of the closet, I didn't have very much stuff at all. It made some sort of sense to treat it all like unobtainium. Well, now that I'm out of the closet, my clothes are in! No more living in a nondistinct shopping bag crammed in the back of a metal cabinet. And, I have a lot. Like 15 pairs of shoes, a dozen dresses, a dozen skirts, twice as many tops, and drawers overflowing with lingerie, hosiery, shapewear, and nightgowns.
I go out these days. Not often, but I do get out, and some portion of my wardrobe really doesn't make the cut. And yet, each piece expresses a mood, or feels nice to wear, or was a fabulous buy that I'm proud of, or harbors the hope it might become an essential part of some outfit I don't have yet.
But, as Steven Wright says, "You can't have everything. Where would you put it?"
The fact is, I need to throw stuff away to make room for new stuff. How do I break my emotional attachment, this horrible instinct that got me through my deepest, darkest, most closeted days, and start throwing things away?
Thanks in advance for any advice.
Pippa
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Comments
find it a good home?
Know anyone else who could put it to good use?
The answer to your question...
The answer to your question will NOT be found in my replay...
I just wanted to point out that cross dressers are not alone in the "purging" though... Many TSs do as well, though likely for a different reason...
about a decade ago, I did my last purge... It was the beginning of an effort to fully suppress "Annette" and not let her out again. There were several other things done as well... Needless to say, it didn't work. *sighs* A few of the items would really have come in handy! LOL And the journal/photos - from my original shrink visits and Real Life Experiences (back in '86) would be nice to have now. *sighs*
Oh well. Perhaps the negatives to the pics are around. I'd really like to have the journals. Not going to happen though. I shredded them.
Good luck on finding homes for those things you need to get rid of...
Of course, you could donate those in good condition to good will or a thrift shop.
Anne
Clothes
Give them to Good Will or the Salvation Army, or even a second hand store. We have like a consignment shop that takes a percentage of the sale and sells it for you.
GO SHOPPING!!!
Form new attachments! Clothes may have emotional memories but you can have them without the clothes to trigger them!
Get over yourself. Retail therapy is all ypu really need.
So Pippa, what you're actually saying,
is that the real reason you've come out of the closet, is that there's no room for you in there anymore? Believe me, I do understand. The rod upon which my clothing hangs, is actually bending slightly from the weight of all my recently acquired purchases. I've no doubt that I will have to do a minor purge soon, just so I can access some things without messing up my hair/wig.
Sigh. It is, in truth, an embarrassment of riches, as it were, although I freely admit that some of the things I've purchased, were less than stylish, and some were acquired because of some mistaken impression I had that I was 25 instead of the 63 years on my odometer. Where oh where is that damned medallion that would allow me to wear, fashionably, the outfits that are totally inappropriate for a matron such as myself?
Still, is all, it is a wonderful problem to have, as opposed to the old days when all I had was a few garments well past their prime. Come to think of it, I have a couple of things that didn't work for you! Seriously, thanks love. Your confidence in me was indeed a factor in making the decision about going full time.
Love ya Pip.
Cathy
As a T-woman, I do have a Y chromosome... it's just in cursive, pink script.
Fashion changes
Remember that fashion changes inexorably over the years. What looked really good a couple of years ago looks a bit off today and is probably going to draw the wrong kind of attention to you if you wear it out.
I don't mean everything, you can probably getaway with most shoes and woolens, but certain things like the cut of blouses and skirts are going to look dated really quick.
I've long since learned that even if I really like something I see in the shops, it might not be a good purchase because it will have a short shelf life. I stick to things now that I am guessing will endure for a while. After all, we're not all made of money.
Of course, size changes also. I can't actually get into some of the things I bought a few years back... off to the charity shop with them.
Sometimes it's good to riffle through the wardrobe and examine everything dispassionately. After all, it's what real women have to do, isn't it?
Penny